Poseur #4: All That Glitters Is Not Gucci (19 page)

“Wait!” yelled a voice from the doorway. Everybody looked. Even Snow. There, standing in the doorway, was Janie, in the single
most bizarre ensemble any of them had ever laid eyes on. The top was made of yellowish fur and studded straps, and the bottom was made of overlapping
scales of black cotton and blue velvet, broken up by flashes of gold. What was she thinking? What was she
wearing
?

“What are you wearing?” gasped Snow.

“Pretend you don’t know her,” Melissa whispered.

“And who
are
you?” added Snow.

“I’m Janie Farrish,” Janie announced, squaring her bony shoulders to the room full of incredulous stares. “I’m the fourth
Poseur girl.”

“It’s…” Snow began, staring at the way the nubby fur bodice gave way to shredded velvet. The way the flashes of gold flecked the black cotton.
“It’s…”

Call Sheet Girl turned to Snow in disbelief. He was never this verbose.

“Art,” he announced finally.

“Yeah, it is so beyond,” cooed his black-haired lackey.

Ted Pelligan beamed with pride from his throne near the minibar.

“What is this creation?” Snow inquired, reaching out to touch the hem of Janie’s crazy garment.

“I call it the Dogfish Dress,” Janie announced.

“The newest design from Poseur!” Melissa rejoined.

December 26, 11:17 p.m.

Fellow Winstonians, Fashionistas, and Fabulazzi:

How’s this for a Christmas/Hanukah/Kwanza/Festivus present? Poseur is not only gonna be in
Nylon
’s 20 Under 20 fashion issue, Poseur is gonna be on
Nylon
’s 20 Under 20 fashion issue! Yeah, you read that right. The painfully adorable Demi Lovato will be wearing Poseur’s sick-ass
new couture gown on the cover of
Nylon
’s February issue!

We here at Poseur would like to take this opportunity to say that we are oh so sorry to the creators of Schizo Montana for
jacking the cover from them.

…

…

Okay, fine—y’all know me too well. We are SO not sorry!

Ahahahahahaha!

So, since you are probably all itchin’ to know how we edged out the mangy t-shirt dudes who were supposed to have the cover,
here is the
411.com
: Our photo in the mag was originally set to feature Poseur’s now-infamous Trick-or-Treater bag, but Janie showed up to the
shoot (way late, but who’s counting) in Poseur’s latest and greatest couture creation and the staff at Nylon went so bananas
for it that they decided
to change the whole plan. Trust me—I couldn’t believe it either. Anyhoo, Poseur’s new Dogfish Dress (it’s capitals cuz it
is that major) is like nothing you’ve ever seen. For real, for real.

The design was inspired by the sound your garbage disposal makes when something is stuck in it. Just-Josh-(Duhamel)-in! You
know I love ya, Dogfish. The outfit is totally fab and although Farrish was the one wearing it to the shoot (and the one who
gets a serious shout-out in the upcoming article), we all collaborated on the look. Don’t get it twisted!

Aight y’all, I am off to celebrate—Bellinis or POMtinis?—so be sure to check back up on us at MoonWalksonMan soon. And if
you are just dying to know what madness we are up to every minute of every day—you know you are!—follow us on Twitter, fan
us on Facebook, and high-five us in the hall.

Happy ChristmaHanuKwanzaVus (or something!) from your besties at Poseur.

Yours with a cherry on top,

Melissa, Janie, Charlotte, Petra

They didn’t ask for fame.

They were born with it.

the
daughters

by JOANNA PHILBIN

As daughters of famous people, Lizzie, Carina, and Hudson were born into the spotlight, and when the world is watching, sometimes
the only place to hide is in the arms of your best friends.

Fourteen-year-old Lizzie Summers always expects fawning photographers and adoring fans to surround her gorgeous supermodel
mother. But when Lizzie is approached by a fashion photographer who believes that she’s “the new face of beauty,” Lizzie surprises
herself and her family by becoming the newest Summers woman to capture the media’s spotlight.