Poughkeepsie (11 page)

Mouse looked annoyed. “You’re lucky I have internet access on this phone.” He set down his magazine and called up a website instead. He disappeared out the door.

Beckett lounged shirtless on his love seat, wearing camouflage pants and combat boots. Livia couldn’t help but notice at least three small, circular scars. Beckett didn’t acknowledge the women as they entered. He swirled clear liquid in a rocks glass. Frank Sinatra crooned from unseen speakers.

“I found these chicks outside,” Eve said disinterestedly. “You know ’em?”

Beckett regarded Livia and Kyle with blurry eyes.

Livia silently begged him to remember her. She bore her eyes into his tattoo in an effort to ignite a memory.

“Maybe.” Beckett took a long, gulping swallow of his drink. “But I’m not in the mood. Kill ’em.”

Eve sighed and responded calmly. “Quit being an ass. Girls like this don’t come here. I bet they have a reason.”

She boldly took his glass. Eve gave him a half smirk and drained it, then threw it against the wall where it shattered between two mounted guns.

“I wounded a piece of trash and popped Dentist in the nuts a few times,” she informed him. “At least hear these two out.” She grabbed a bar towel, threw another one to Livia, and hiked her leg up on Beckett’s desk. Livia swabbed gingerly at the cut on her neck, which was mercifully superficial, as Eve wiped the blood off her spike heel.

Beckett slowly extracted himself from the couch. He looked like a life-size GI Joe doll with his rippling chest and army pants. He rubbed the back of his hand across his lips. “All right, what the hell are you doing here, Whitebread? And why did you bring Fairy Princess with you?”

“I want to talk about Blake,” Livia said.

Beckett rolled his eyes and let out a mighty sigh. “Hey, killer, take Fairy Princess to the waiting area.”

Eve gave him the finger and motioned for Kyle with her head. Livia’s hand remained clamped around Kyle’s.

Beckett raised his eyebrow. “She’ll be safe. I promise.”

Livia released her grip, and Kyle followed Eve out. Eve closed the office door, sealing Livia in.

“If I remember correctly, I asked you very nicely not to break his heart,” Beckett said, taking a seat behind his desk.

Livia couldn’t sit. Her limbs twitched with adrenaline. “Have you seen him?” she bounced on her toes, wringing the bar towel in her hands.

“No, miss. I have not. Looks like you put yourself through this exciting evening for no reason whatsoever.” Beckett dug through the top drawer of his desk. From the place where most people keep pens, Beckett withdrew rolling papers and a plastic bag.

Livia covered her face with her hands. “Damn it. What was I supposed to do? Tell him he was made of glass? I couldn’t look him in the eye and lie. Maybe that was a stupid mistake.” Beckett’s jaw tightened as Livia continued her tirade. “And you’re no freaking help at all—with your whores and your drugs and your evil goddamn lifestyle.”

Beckett looked down for a moment, then eyed her with absolute fury. He gripped the edge of the desk. “I’ve done my best to make sure my brothers have no blood on their hands,” he said with menacing quiet. “Do you know what it’s like to age out of the foster care system? I had no one. No one except Cole and Blake.” He stood and angrily swiped everything off his desk into a heap on the floor. He rushed to grab her by the arms. The bar towel fell to the ground. “Pretty, pampered Livia wants to lie with the dogs. I take it you’re some sort of expert? I’m going to tell you something I’ve never told a soul.”

Livia felt oddly calm. She recognized this Beckett—the one who’d begged her to protect Blake’s heart.

“I hit the streets first. So I knew what we were in for. I’m not a smart guy, but I can read a situation. To live in this world without a dime or a pot to piss in, you have to sell your soul or your body.”

He let go of her and took a step back, but Livia refused to let him get away. She took one of his big, rough hands in both of hers. He didn’t pull it back, but looked at the ceiling, rather than her.

“I wouldn’t let them face that choice. I had six months to become the baddest motherfucker who ever lived. So I fucked up piles of people. I sold my soul, Livia, and I sold other people’s bodies. But when my brothers stepped out of our foster home for the last time, I had respect. Respect enough to keep
their
souls clean. I’m going to hell, Livia,” he said.

He looked at her now, his eyes glassy with tears, and Livia knew she was one of very, very few to ever see him in this state.

“I’m going to hell for all three of us,” Beckett said defiantly. Only now did he pull his hand away.

“I think you might be a better man than you give yourself credit for,” Livia said, trying to catch his eye again.

Beckett seemed embarrassed. Livia let the emotion ease and stepped back. She finally felt able to sit and collapsed on the loveseat. After a moment Beckett settled on top of his desk.

“So what’s up with Eve?” Livia asked. “She can kick ass.”

“She’s hot shit, right?” Beckett looked at the closed office door as if he could see right through it.

“When I was here before wasn’t she a…um…” Livia didn’t know how to make the word
hooker
politically correct.

Beckett laughed. “So, yeah, I had to bang the whores that day. I always make sure the merchandise is quality, right? Well, the other two were these lifeless bitches that only moved when they freaking sneezed or coughed, so they were out.” Beckett shook his head. “Then Eve walks in, strips naked, and starts dancing like a goddamn showgirl. So I’m here, drooling, when she comes up behind me with a knife she pulled out of her fucking hair. It was insanely hot.”

Livia looked doubtful.

“So I’m sitting in that damn chair, ready to die, and I say to her, ‘You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. I’m so damn glad you’re going to kill me instead of some brainless, toothless druggie.’” Beckett smiled again at the memory of his almost-murder. “Then she traded the knife for her lips, and now she works for me.” Beckett put his hands behind his head and flexed his giant biceps. “She won’t tell me who hired her to come here. She’s the deadliest person I’ve ever encountered. I still think she might kill me, but I can’t stop looking at her.”

“Well, good luck with that,” Livia said. “I wouldn’t want her pissed at me. She saved us tonight, no thanks to you.”

“You’re lucky Eve has a kind heart. I would’ve just watched the show out there.”

“A kind heart, eh? And you would’ve just watched them do whatever it is they do to me and my sister?” Livia didn’t buy it.

“Before, maybe. Now, no,” he said.

In light of her new status, Livia tried again. “Where can I find him?”

“Whitebread, you won’t find him until he wants to be found. He’s the best in the woods—silent, quiet, and patient. No one can find Blake.” Beckett nodded, seeming to agree with his own words. Then he stood. “I can tell you no one will touch him. Not now. The only person who’s a danger to Blake is
Blake
. And maybe you.” Beckett headed to the office door, a signal that the conversation was over.

Livia stopped the door with her hand and insisted on hugging Beckett. He hesitated, but hugged her back. “An anonymous donor recently funded the purchase of an organ for Our Lady of the River,” he told her softly. “I’d find out when that’s going to be delivered.”

He stepped back to open the door, and Livia had to remind her feet to move. She was captivated again by this complicated man.

Perhaps he took her reluctance to leave as fear, but Beckett surprised Livia by walking her and Kyle to the car. Mouse closed his phone and stepped out of the way as Beckett opened Kyle’s door for her.

“Don’t come here again. Ever,” he said, but instead of a threat, this sounded like a declaration of affection.

As Livia looked up at him, she saw Eve literally watching his back. Her hard stare held a tiny layer of concern.

“Beckett, you can kiss my ass,” Livia countered. “I’ll be here if you need me—or if I need you.”

Beckett winked before growling angrily, surveying the parking lot, and turning to go back inside.

8

Midnight Mass

K
YLE
F
INALLY
L
OOKED
A
T
Livia when they’d driven a respectable distance from Beckett’s pulsating black hole of evil.

“Um…” Kyle looked pale.

“Yeah.” Residual fear backed up on Livia like a clogged sink.

“Okay.” Kyle put her eyes back on the road. “I feel like I want to puke. You?”

“I think I’ve tamped it down. Did we just witness something awful?” Livia rubbed the back of her neck.

“I don’t know what that was.” Kyle gripped the wheel and appeared to shrug it off.

“What did RoboBlonde say while I was in talking to Beckett?” Livia couldn’t imagine what Kyle had been thinking.

“I think she was practicing her cursing in Russian while she sharpened her throwing stars.” Kyle raised her eyebrows and shook her head. “I’m not kidding. What did the human steroid have to say? Has he seen your man?”

“You think Beckett’s on steroids?” Livia asked.

“I didn’t see a World Gym in there, did you?” Kyle answered.

Livia sighed. “Blake hasn’t been there and, according to Beckett, I won’t be able to find him,” Livia said.

“Well, great. I’m glad we dangled our asses over the jaws of death to earn that little nugget. You didn’t perhaps get Beckett’s cell number so we can avoid this in the future?” Kyle gripped the steering wheel again.

“Wait, I also found out Beckett donated an organ to Cole’s church.” Livia felt hope caress the sides of her heart.

“Yuck. Which organ?” Kyle looked horrified.

“A
pipe
organ. A musical instrument, dumbass.” Livia smiled, and her body considered relaxing a bit.

“Oh.
Oh!
Cardboard piano man gets a crack at a real keyboard. I get it now. You’re the dumbass,” Kyle said as she dug her cell phone out of her pocket.

“I guess it still has to be delivered,” Livia continued. “Hang a right here. I want to drive by the church and see if I can wake up Cole.” Livia barely finished the sentence.

“You sound more scared of Cole than you did of the drug den.” Kyle flipped open her phone and began texting with one hand.

“His boss
is
powerful.” Livia took a deep breath and tried to make herself feel lighter after the darkness that she and her sister had just experienced. It was 11:15.
What does a sort-of priest do at this hour?

Kyle’s texting consumed her as she pulled into the empty parking lot.

“What are you typing?” Livia did not share Kyle’s obsession with electronic contraptions.

“Currently, I’m texting Debbi, Michelle, Karen, and Sam. This incident boosts my street cred.” Kyle’s text was in all caps.

“Oh, pardon me. I didn’t realize you were straight-up gangsta,” Livia mocked.

“Whatever. I had some bastard’s finger in my mouth tonight. I’m milking this story for all it’s worth.” Kyle hit send.

“Don’t tell anyone about Blake, please.” Livia covered Kyle’s phone so her sister would look her in the face.

“I won’t. Listen, can I stay here while you frisk the Pope?” Kyle’s cell phone vibrated with replies beneath their hands like an anxious puppy.

“Fine, but we’re putting the top on the car.” Livia reached over Kyle to pop the rear hatch.

After much grumbling and some heavy lifting, Kyle was back in the covered car with her fingers flying over the minuscule keyboard again. Livia took a gulp of night air, and thoughts of Blake flooded her mind.
Is he cold? How are his hands? Where
is
he?

Livia put her concern for Blake on hold.
To help him I have to find him
.

Visiting Beckett had been a physical challenge; seeing Cole would be a mental one. As Livia headed to the church, she noticed the stained glass windows were hardly visible in the dark. She studied them for a moment. The windows had so many fragile pieces, yet fused together they were strong enough to keep the sacred things inside the church safe. As she contemplated, she saw a small glow light up the corner of the window directly in front of her.
Blake
.

She had no idea why one illumination in the dark night filled her mind with his name, but she ran to the front doors. Another light flickered inside.
The church is on fire
.
Blake!

Livia burst through the huge, creaky doors and grabbed the bowl of holy water off of the font in the foyer. Livia’s heart raced as she turned to see a man with his hands full of flames.

Livia threw the holy water on him and extinguished the candles he held. Cole looked curiously calm in the remaining light from the wall sconces.