“I sincerely hope you didn’t tell your mother that.”
“Yes, I did.”
“Oh, dear…she must have been terribly upset.”
Chloe bit her lip and nodded again.
Derek took hold of her hand, tucked her arm through his, and started to walk on toward the river.
A silence fell between them.
Eventually, Derek broke the silence when he murmured, “I am quite certain that it hurt her very much, Chloe, hearing this from you.”
“I suppose so,” she mumbled.
“I don’t understand you!” he exclaimed, sudden irritation rushing to the surface. “Why London? You could learn as much in New York. And there’s no one smarter than your mother. Being at the Fifth Avenue store with her would please her no end; I know that for a fact. It wouldn’t do you any harm either.”
“I think I would learn a lot more about stones and designing jewelry in London. The showrooms are bigger, so are the workshops, and there are many other kinds of craftsmen there, as well as lapidaries—silversmiths, goldsmiths. Anyway, Gideon would teach me better than anyone. He’s Power of a Woman / 115
one of the greatest lapidaries there is, and he’s the Crown Jeweller, the only person allowed to handle the Crown Jewels of England.”
“Yes, yes, I know all that,” Derek exclaimed irritably. “But look here, Chloe, you could work at Jardine’s, be it in London or New York,
after
you’ve graduated. I’m the last person to stop you from chasing your dream; didn’t I just say that to you?
Nevertheless, won’t you consider going to university? For yourself, for your mother, and for me too, but mostly for yourself. It’s so important for your future, whatever career you choose ultimately.”
There was only the slightest hesitation before she said, “I’ll think about it, Grandpa.”
The two of them walked on quietly, without speaking, lost in their own thoughts, still heading in the direction of the river that flowed past the house at the bottom of the gardens.
Derek was truly dismayed about his conversation with Chloe, and genuinely upset for Stevie. Knowing her as well as he did, he realized how terrible she must be feeling, hurting inside. Oh, the young, how carelessly cruel they could be with their rash words, usually uttered without a single thought. And no hurt ever intended, of course.
Selfish youth
. But then, hadn’t he been selfish when he was young? When he thought he knew it all, believed he had all the answers?
He was sixty-eight years old now, and in so many ways he felt as though he knew nothing, had 116 / Barbara Taylor Bradford
learned nothing, in spite of the multitudinous experiences in his life. The longer he lived, the less he knew, or so it seemed to him. He was always telling Blair that nothing surprised him anymore, because he always expected the worst. Yet he was constantly being surprised. Chloe had just done that.
They arrived at the summerhouse, which stood under the willows close to the river’s bank. Derek marched purposefully up the steps, saying over his shoulder, “Let’s sit in here for a few minutes; it’s nice to watch the wildlife on the river from here, and we’re protected from the wind. Anyway, I need a rest; that was quite a long walk.”
Dutifully Chloe tramped after him up the short flight of steps and joined him on the wooden bench where he had seated himself.
Slowly she unwound her scarf, pulled off her knit cap, and sighed as she ran her hands through her hair, pushing it away from her face.
“All the troubles of the world on your shoulders, eh, Chloe?”
She shook her head.
He looked at her intently and realized that she was on the verge of tears. Reaching out, Derek put his hand on her arm and murmured gently, “Now, now, what’s all this?”
“Nothing, nothing, Grandpa,” she said, shaking her head, and then she flicked her fingers across her eyes, swallowed hard, and tried to smile without success. Her bottom lip quivered slightly.
Power of a Woman / 117
“There’s nothing to cry about, Chloe. Was I too harsh with you, darling? I didn’t mean to be.”
“No, no, you weren’t. Honestly, you weren’t. It’s just me. I’m being silly, I suppose.”
“In what way?”
“I’ve upset my mother about not going to college, and you, too, Grandpa. And I guess I’ve really hurt her feelings, telling her I prefer to work in London.
I didn’t want to cause trouble. I really didn’t, and I didn’t want to hurt anyone either, especially Mom.”
“I know that, Chloe, and I’m quite certain that she does too. Anyway, you did say you would consider going to Oxford first, before embarking on a career, be it at Jardine’s or not. If you tell her this, you will please her, make her feel so much better, I promise you.”
Chloe was silent. After a split second she nodded and then, swiveling her head to Derek, she stared at him, biting her lip nervously. Quite unexpectedly, and much to her mortification, tears welled in her eyes, slowly slid down her cheeks.
“Chloe, Chloe, whatever’s the matter?” Derek asked, staring at her in concern, reaching out once more, taking hold of her hand this time.
When she remained silent, he asked, “Is there something you want to tell me? Do you have some sort of problem?”
Taking a deep breath, Chloe replied, “One of the reasons I wanted to come for a walk with you 118 / Barbara Taylor Bradford
was to ask you something—” She cut herself off and simply stared at him as blankly as before.
Derek nodded. “Go on, then, ask me. I’m not going to bite your head off, you silly goose.”
“It’s…it’s about…about my father.”
“What about him?” Derek asked, although he knew at once what she was going to say.
“Who was he
really
?”
Derek sighed heavily. “I don’t know, truly I don’t, Chloe.”
“Would you tell me if you
did
know?”
“I most certainly would.”
“I don’t think my mother is being fair to me. I’m grown-up now. Anyway, I’ve known about being illegitimate for years. I think I should know about my father, know about his background, who he was, what he was like.”
“I agree, Chloe,” Derek replied, and he meant this.
“Then help me, Gramps, please.”
“How, darling?”
“Talk to Mom. She listens to you. Tell her she should tell me everything about my father.”
“She won’t tell you.”
“Why not?”
“I’ve no idea.” He shook his head. “She’s always been very secretive about him.”
“You never met him? Never knew him?”
“No, I didn’t, Chloe.”
“And Grandma?”
“She didn’t meet him either. He was always…the mystery man.”
Power of a Woman / 119
“I don’t even know what my father looked like,”
Chloe whispered, her eyes filling.
“Don’t cry, sweetheart.”
“Grandpa, please talk to her.”
“First, let’s go and talk to your grandmother.”
B
LAIR STOOD IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SMALL SITTING
room that adjoined their bedroom, staring first at Derek and then at Chloe. She exclaimed, “You’re both looking very conspiratorial! What is it?”
Derek said, “Ask Chloe, my dear,” and walked across the room, where he positioned himself in front of the fire, stood warming his back against the flames.
“Is something wrong, Chloe?” Blair asked, searching her granddaughter’s face intently, frowning as she did so.
“I want to know about my father, everything about him. Mom has never told me a thing. Please, Grandma, you tell me,” Chloe said, getting straight to the heart of the matter. “
Please?
”
Blair was somewhat taken aback and showed it.
Then she sat down heavily in a chair and said, “But I can’t tell you anything, Chloe. For the sim-122 / Barbara Taylor Bradford
ple reason I never knew your father. I never met him, never even spoke to him on the phone.”
“But Mom must have said something about him, mentioned him to you.”
“She didn’t.”
“But how…how did she tell you about
me
, Gran?”
“She came to me one day and said she was pregnant. I was very happy for her, enthusiastic, because naturally I thought there was going to be a wedding.”
“But there wasn’t because—” Chloe stopped with abruptness. She went and flung herself on the sofa, looking disconsolate.
Derek and Blair exchanged pointed looks, and Derek said, “Because
what
, darling?”
“Because he was
dead
. She told me my father was killed in a car crash before they could get married.”
“Oh,” Blair said.
“Didn’t she tell you that, Grandma?”
Blair shook her head.
“Then
what
did she say?” Chloe demanded quietly.
“Nothing much, actually, Chloe,” Blair told her, and explained, “When I said something about her getting married, how happy I was for her, she said,
‘I’m not getting married. There won’t be a wedding.’
I’ve always remembered her words, remembered that particular day very clearly. It was a rainy day in London, and I recall walking
Power of a Woman / 123
over to the window, looking out at our garden. We lived in Hampstead in those days. Near the Heath.
I just stood there, feeling numb, looking out at the sodden trees, watching the rivulets of water running down the panes. And I thought, it’s like my tears, the rain is like my tears.”
“So you were upset then, Gran?”
“Of course I was upset! For your mother. After all, she wasn’t getting any younger; she was almost twenty-eight. I wanted her to find happiness with someone, have a second chance at life, a chance with another husband.”
“Instead of another husband, she got me. The bastard.”
“Chloe! Don’t speak in that way! You’ve never been made to feel unwanted or unloved, and certainly you’ve never been made to feel like a bastard.
That’s most
unfair
of you,” Blair chastised, her voice reproving, her face stern. “We’ve all loved you very much, Bruce Jardine included. And you’re a Jardine, don’t you ever forget that. Why, nobody’s given a thought to your father, or asked questions about his identity, for the past eighteen years. There’s another thing you should remember—” She paused, and her voice softened as she finished. “You’ve given us all a great deal of joy, and you’ve made a difference in all of our lives. As I just said, we love you, Chloe, cherish you.”
“Indeed we do!” Derek exclaimed. “And we want only the best for you. Your mother most of all wants that.”
124 / Barbara Taylor Bradford
Chloe said, “On my birth certificate it says my father was John Lane.
Who
was John Lane?”
“I don’t know. Your grandpa doesn’t know.” Blair leaned forward, an earnest look washing across her face. “Until the day your mother told me she was expecting a child, I didn’t even know she had a boyfriend. She worked extremely hard, and she was bringing up your brothers, and it seemed to me she didn’t have very much time left to conduct an affair, have any kind of personal life.”
“She had John Lane, Gran. Ask her. Ask her about
him
. Make her tell you.
Everything
. I’ve a right to know.”
“I understand how you feel; I really do. And I’ll gladly speak to your mother. However, I can’t promise I’ll be successful. She’s my daughter, don’t forget, and I know her better than anyone. Once she’s made up her mind about something, she rarely, if ever, changes it.”
Chloe sighed. “If she’ll tell anyone, it’ll be you, Gran.”
“Well, I don’t know about that,” Blair responded carefully, shaking her beautifully coiffed blond head.
“She’s kept him a secret since before you were born, so why should she divulge anything now? Not even André Birron knows about your father, and if she’d been going to confide in anyone, it would have been André. They’ve always been very close.”
“You’ve discussed this with Uncle André?”
Power of a Woman / 125
“A long time ago, yes.”
“And he had no clue?”
“No, he didn’t, and he actually told me to leave it alone. He told me my prying would do no good, only antagonize Stevie, possibly even cause an es-trangement if I wasn’t careful, if I persisted. Since I didn’t want that to happen, I took André’s advice.”
Derek said, “I feel for you, Chloe, and I know your grandmother does too. It’s only natural for you to want to know a little more about your father. If your grandmother is in agreement with me on this,
I’ll
speak to your mother this weekend. But you must leave it to me, Chloe; you mustn’t pester me. I’ll do it when the right opportunity presents itself.”
“Oh, thank you, thank you, Gramps!” Chloe cried, and jumped up, ran across the room, hugged him tightly.
Derek held her close to him, loving her. She was so young, so vulnerable. He met Blair’s eyes across the room, smiled faintly, and raised a brow. He had recognized the look on his wife’s face instantly. It mirrored what he himself was thinking: Stevie would tell him nothing.
Later that afternoon, Derek put down the script he had been reading and, looking over at his wife, he said, “Do you think all families are like ours?”
“What do you mean?”
126 / Barbara Taylor Bradford
“Dysfunctional.”
“How can you say that, Derek! We’re not dysfunctional!”
“We’re trotting along in that direction.”
“I don’t believe we’re having this conversation.”
“Believe it, darling.” Derek laughed hollowly.
“There’s nothing new about dysfunctional families.
They’ve been around since the Stone Age.” He glanced at the script on the ottoman next to his chair. “Take the Plantagenets, for example.”
Blair simply gaped at him.
Derek grinned, amused by her expression of mingled disbelief and denial. “Seriously, Blair, look at Henry Plantagenet and Eleanor of Aquitaine, their three sons, Richard, Geoffrey, and John, and Alais Capet, their French ward who was also Henry’s mistress. Now, that was a dysfunctional family if ever there was one. Things haven’t changed much since 1183, when Henry II was king of England and half of France.”
“Are you going to do the revival of
The Lion in
Winter?
” Blair asked, her eyes swinging to the script he had been reading.