“Annie.”
Her breath caught, and she spun around. There was Joshua, sitting on the porch swing. Funny she hadn’t seen him. But then, she hadn’t been looking. “Feel better?”
He shrugged. “Passable. I took another pain pill. It’s beginning to kick in.” He patted the seat beside him. “Kum here. Just for a minute. Then, we’ll go back to the barn.”
“And pretend to be the picture of wedded bliss?” She hadn’t meant to sound so sarcastic.
He winced. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to give the impression I didn’t care.”
How could he confuse an impression for reality? She knew he didn’t care. She frowned, took another glance at the barn, and then went to sit beside Joshua. Playing the part of the obedient little frau. After all, everyone would expect her to be submissive to her husband. He slid his arm behind her, resting it loosely on the back of the bench.
“I suppose I gave the same impression of not caring.” Except that she did care. Too much. And it tore her up inside to know that the wedding being celebrated—their wedding—was a complete sham. That she and Joshua would probably never be truly married, in the full sense of the word.
His hand closed around her shoulders and tugged her tightly against him, which caused her to jump slightly. Her heart rate escalated.
He set the swing to swaying, while his thumb started making circles on the sleeve of her dress. Then, he looked at her. Really looked at her, in a serious way. “What I was saying upstairs, before my daed called? I want to court you, Annie. If you’ll let me.”
“Court me? We’re married.” Did her tone sound as flat to him as it did to her?
A smile flickered across his face. “Jah. But it doesn’t change that I want to court you. I still want to woo you and win you.”
“I don’t know why you’d want to do that.” Annie looked down. “We were forced….”
He reached out a hand and touched her chin, then gently turned her face toward his. “Because my ultimate goal was to marry you, regardless. I hadn’t planned on its happening so soon, of course; that much is true. I thought maybe next wedding season, after we’d courted, because I wanted you to love me.” His smile grew. “But I’m not going to complain too loudly.”
“You wanted to marry
me
?” Her voice had squeaked, but she didn’t care.
“Jah.” His gaze dropped to her lips, and her breath hitched again. “And now, I want to kiss my bride.”
Her eyes widened. “But we’re in public! Someone might see us.” Yet she wanted it as badly as he apparently did.
“Please? It’s our wedding day. And no one is around right now.” He glanced toward the barn. “No one will see.” After her hesitant nod, he cupped her face with both hands, his thumbs gently sliding over her lips, with the effect of lightning bolts. Gazing deeply into her eyes, he slowly lowered his lips to hers. One hand slid behind her neck, fingering the wisps of hair that had escaped from her kapp, while the other hand drew her nearer. He twisted to face her fully, angling his mouth to fit hers. Then, he groaned, deep in his throat, and pulled her tightly against him, pressing her body to his.
Annie’s hands were crushed between them, flat against his chest, which was painful with her sprained wrist. She tugged them free, and then, not knowing what else to do with them, wrapped them around his neck, her fingers tangling in his hair. She heard herself make a little moan.
Then, his kisses changed, becoming a little harder, more desperate. Her knees turned to liquid; her toes curled uncontrollably in her shoes. His hands wandered down her back to her waist. “Annie,” he sighed. She didn’t expect him to wrench free as he did, moving away from her. “Ach, what you do to me.” His voice was hoarse.
But she didn’t want his kisses to end. She reached toward him, wanting, needing, to snuggle in his arms again.
“There you are. We were looking all over for you.” The familiar voice was an unwelcome intrusion.
Annie dropped her hands to her sides and looked up. Becky, holding Emma, stood with Jacob on the bottom step of the porch. Jacob aimed a smirk at Joshua. “Think you two had better go back to the singing before someone else misses you.”
Joshua stood. “Jah. Maybe so.” He took Annie’s hand and helped her to her feet.
“We’re going,” Becky said. “It’s Emma’s nap time.” She handed Emma to Jacob, then reached out to give Annie a hug. “I’ll be praying.” She pulled back. “You’ll still kum to my work frolic, ain’t so? You can do some work with one hand.”
“We’ll be there,” Joshua assured them. He draped an arm around Annie’s waist and held her loosely as they stood there, watching Becky and Jacob head to their buggy. Then, Joshua dropped a quick kiss on Annie’s lips. “They’re right. We need to get back.” He grinned at her. “It’s our wedding day.”
Annie nodded, feeling happier than she had in a long time. Maybe her wedding day would be joyful, after all.
***
Joshua held Annie’s hand all the way back to the barn. He hoped no one would peek out and ruin the moment. The strict rules regarding public displays of affection banned even the simplest of touches, such as holding hands. And he’d broken every one of those rules with Annie.
He didn’t care. Except that he didn’t want to cause her any embarrassment. It was enough that she’d allowed his advances on the porch swing. He wouldn’t force her to hold hands in view of their wedding guests.
He sighed, thinking of the Englisch wedding he’d attended. The groom had actually been encouraged to kiss the bride in front of everyone, and not just once. Often. In that case, it had made Joshua uncomfortable. But now, as the groom, he wished that the Amish allowed such behavior. Then, he’d feel free to act like a lovesick puppy around his frau. To kiss her with abandon, without having to worry who was watching.
As they neared the open doors of the barn, he released her hand with a smile.
She returned his gaze with the sweetest grin, one that almost melted him into a puddle of water, right there on the barn floor. He could have stood there and gazed into her chocolate-brown eyes all night. Grinning like a fool the entire time.
Jah, he was in love. Totally, deeply, forever.
And he seemed to be making strides toward winning her heart.
He found a place next to his cousin Matthew, sat down, and joined in the song, watching Annie as she sat down next to Shanna and began singing, too. Then, he looked away, scanning the faces of the guests who remained.
His gaze locked on a pair of angry brown eyes. He flinched when the redhead to whom they belonged made a rude gesture at him.
Luke.
Heading up to bed with Joshua that night was more than awkward. No one said anything, of course, since they were married, but Annie felt weird. Uncomfortable. Scared. And excited.
The moment became more awkward still when Joshua shut the door behind them. She eyed the bed, her eyes widening. “I’m nervous.”
Joshua glanced at the bed, too, then turned and trailed a finger down her cheek. “We can just kiss all nacht, if we want to. Nein rules against that.”
Oh, she wanted to. Kisses, she could handle. She went willingly into his arms. Welcoming his kisses.
The next morning, Annie awoke to the feel of Joshua’s fingers lightly tracing the skin of her arm. She stretched sleepily, then snuggled against him again.
“Ich liebe dich, Annie Esh,” he whispered.
A thrill worked all the way through her. He’d never told her that before. She wrapped her arms around him and smiled. “Ich liebe dich, Joshua Esh.”
His grin faded, and he lowered his head. She pressed against him, no longer feeling so awkward or embarrassed. She wasn’t sure why she’d been so afraid.
A few minutes later, she rolled out of bed. It must have been later than five o’clock, since the sun was now up. She hurried to get dressed, wanting to get downstairs and take on the day—her first as a frau. Unlike most newly married couples, she and Joshua would not be traveling around to the homes of various relatives. With Mamm and Cathy injured and out of commission, they’d stay home, instead. Annie needed to work, sprained wrist or not.
When Annie entered the kitchen, she saw Mamm leaning on her walker with one hand, trying to carry the teakettle to the stove with the other. Annie hurried to take it from her. “Gut morgen, Mamm. So sorry I’m late.”
“I think it’s understandable.” Mamm gave her a tender look. “I’ll let you take over, if you don’t mind. I’m a bit overtired from yesterday. Though it was beautiful. And, even if I might have changed the situation, I couldn’t have picked a better son-in-law.”
Joshua came into the room and kissed Mamm on her cheek. “And I couldn’t pick a better mamm-in-law. Is Isaac out in the barn already?”
“Jah, starting the chores.”
“I’ll go straight there.” He winked at Annie, then grabbed his shoes and went out the door.
Through the window, Annie watched him sit down on the porch swing to put on his shoes. “Did Cathy ever get up?” Annie turned to look at Mamm. Her sister hadn’t made an appearance at the wedding celebration, as far as Annie knew. But she supposed that was understandable, if she was taking strong pain pills, as Shanna had suggested.
“Nein, she’s still in bed. I think she’s had quite a shock, with the accident and all. Some people don’t handle them well.”
Annie put the teakettle on the stove. “You have a seat. I’ll be right back down to start breakfast, but I need to check on Cathy.”
Upstairs, she tapped lightly on Cathy’s door. She didn’t hear a response, so she opened the door and entered the dark room. She walked over to the window and adjusted the blinds to let in a bit of sunlight. Then, turning, she faced the bed. Cathy’s eyes were open, and also red, as if she’d cried all night. “Go away.” Her voice was raw.
Annie was taken aback. “What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong? You’re really asking me what’s wrong? I’ll tell you what’s wrong.
He
survived. And I’m so afraid David didn’t. Nobody will tell me!” Fresh tears rolled down Cathy’s bruised cheeks.
“Nein, Cathy. David’s okay. He’s alive, thanks to Joshua. He had some kind of blood clot in the hospital, after the surgery they did on his broken arm.”
Cathy sat up. “Really? You aren’t just making that up to make me feel better?”
Annie shook her head. “Why would I lie?”
“I don’t know. How did Joshua save his life? He isn’t a doctor.”
“I don’t know the details, but that’s what Bishop Sol’s wife said yesterday.”
“What was Bertha King doing here? I dreamed that Shanna Stoltzfus came by, and that she was trying to wake me up and get me dressed.” Cathy shook her head confusedly.
“It wasn’t a dream. She tried to wake you up for…my wedding.” Annie glanced at Cathy. She dreaded telling her who she’d married. But maybe the ensuing storm wouldn’t be as bad as she feared.
Cathy snorted. “You’re not serious. There is nein way you could have gotten married without my knowing about it.”
“I know it seems unbelievable. In fact, I have trouble believing it myself.” Annie smiled, remembering her evening with Joshua. “But I did.”
Cathy frowned. “Luke? I heard he was bragging around that he’d be marrying you sooner rather than later. Saturday nacht, someone told me that.”
Annie froze. “It wasn’t Luke.”
Danki, Lord.
“I married Joshua.”
Cathy snorted again. “Joshua Esh.”
“Jah.”
“Now that, I don’t believe. I’m sorry.” Cathy shook her head and looked away. “David’s okay? I’ll see if Daed will let me call a driver to take me to visit him.”
Annie shook her head. “He won’t. The bishop would take issue with your being in a bu’s hospital room.” That was a serious understatement, of course.
Cathy frowned again as she pulled herself out of bed. She held up her arm with the cast. “Can you help me get dressed? If Daed lets me, I’ll find some friends to go with me, so that we don’t upset the bishop.”
Annie went to the closet to pull out a dress for Cathy, her fingers sliding over the soft fabric of a green frock. Maybe it was time she bought some new material. Something other than drab brown. She’d have to plan a trip to the fabric store. She took the dress off the hanger and brought it to Cathy. It was kind of awkward to get Cathy dressed, with one of her arms in a cast, not to mention Annie’s wrist in a splint. She finally had to rip the sleeve along one seam so that it would fit over the cast. “We can mend it after you get the cast removed,” she said as she helped Cathy back into the sling, supporting the arm.