“I need you, too. What about us? Are you going to let your mother tell you how to love, who to love, and who to marry? We’re meant to be, you and I. Or have you forgotten?” She hated grasping at the last bits of hope she could find, but couldn’t seem to stop herself.
He only shook his head. “I haven’t forgotten our promise to each other. It’s not for long, Annie. Until I can graduate and come back here to claim my own life. Once I take over for Dad, there isn’t anything my mother can do. I only have to humor her, for a while. Play the game. Just for a while.”
He brought her to her feet, cradled her closer, pressed a kiss to her temple, her ear, working a path to her mouth. He whispered, “She doesn’t have to know. We can still see each other, and she’ll never be the wiser.” His lips brushed hers, using kisses to sway and persuade her.
She slapped a hand over his mouth, angry, yet resigned, as she pushed him away. “No. You’re not seeing the whole picture. I’m not even sure you’re able to.” She rubbed at the pressure behind her eyes. “Your mother will never let you go, not as long as you do what she tells you, even if you think you’re just humoring her.” Turning to face him, she held a hand out to ward him off when he would have taken her in his arms again. “Just stop, Travis, and listen to me. What if she decides it’s time for you to marry Catherine Cabot, and she gives you a ring and tells you to push it on Catherine’s finger? Or else she’ll disown you, drop her support of your schooling, ruin your chances of taking over for your daddy.” She spread her hands for emphasis. “You never thought she could do half the things she’s already done, and yet she has.”
Stepping back until she could reach the bedroom door, Annie opened it and held it wide. Her heart broke as she looked at the only boy she’d ever loved, now a confused young man who still thought he could use half-truths to outsmart the most powerful driving force in his life. It was just sad.
“I won’t be your little secret. You either love me out in the open for all to see, proudly, or you forget it.” She gestured toward the dim hall beyond the doorway and choked back a sob when he stood there staring at her. “You’d better go. She might figure out where you are, and make it worse for you.” Impatiently Annie jerked her thumb at the door when he failed to budge from his stance by the bed. “Go on, Travis. I mean it.”
He sighed and bent to pick up the clothes he’d strewn around. She kept quiet, her eyes closed in desolation, unable to watch him dress without wanting to beg him to take everything off again and jump back into her bed.
When he finally realized he couldn’t sway her, he walked through the doorway and descended the stairs. He looked back once at her as she stood in the upstairs hall. She crossed her arms and tucked her hands against her sides to keep them from reaching out. And hated herself for that lingering trace of weakness.
On the landing, he turned to her and begged, “Annie, don’t do this. Please, just trust me. Give me some time to figure things out.”
“Are you going to tell Catherine to go find someone else to marry? Are you going to tell your mother where she can stick all of her schemes and plans?” The words and tone were harder than she’d ever used. She saw him flinch at the sound of them.
“No. I’m—” He paused, took a breath. Swallowed. Looked away as he shook his head. “I can’t.”
“Then you’ve made your decision. And so have I. Don’t call me again. Don’t come back here.”
“You don’t mean that, Annie.” Panic showed in his expression as he swung back to her.
She kept the hardness in her heart. “Oh, yes. I do.”
Annie turned her back on him and walked into her room. Her body shuddered only once—when she heard the front door close behind him.
Turning Away
August
Annie turned sideways in front of the mirror and pressed a hand on her stomach, smoothing her sleeveless shirt until it molded to her hips. Still flat. But not for long.
Pregnant. The thought of it never failed to break her out in a sweat and set her heart to pounding. A month had passed since she’d gone to the free clinic over in Weston. Her family’s support eased much of her panic, and in time, she figured the shock would disappear as well. But she’d be lying to herself if she tried to pretend she wasn’t scared.
It was a staggering responsibility.
Her
responsibility. And she wasn’t yet seventeen.
Turning to her bed, she folded a few more tee shirts and the last of her winter sweaters, placed them in the open box on the floor, and laid underwear and socks on top. She hadn’t told her mama and daddy yet, but she planned on leaving for Roanoke as soon as she could. She’d live with her Aunt Nan in the big old Victorian house that had been in her mama’s family for the past eighty years.
In Roanoke, she could finish school at home. Aunt Nan said she’d help her. In Roanoke, nobody knew her and in such a big city, no one would care that she was a pregnant teenager.
In Roanoke, Ruth Quincy wouldn’t find her. Annie sank down on the corner of the bed, a nightgown bunched in her hands, and took deep breaths to keep from hyperventilating. She didn’t want to go, but she had no choice.
After the supper dishes were cleared, Annie took a seat next to her mama. “I think I should go live with Aunt Nan until the baby’s born, maybe stay there for a while after.”
“What? You can’t leave. What on earth brought this on?”
Her daddy placed a hand on Mama’s shoulder to soothe her, but his eyes showed his worry. “Annie, I think you’d better explain yourself.”
She tried to remain matter-of-fact. “I need to get away before anyone finds out about the baby. I don’t want to start senior year at Thompkin High wearing maternity clothes. You know how folks are around here, how they’d talk.”
“Yes, of course I know. But running away isn’t the answer.” Mama gave it some thought. “I guess you don’t have to go back to Thompkin High. You could home school right here. I could help you.” She appealed to Daddy. “Couldn’t we help her, Henry? How hard would it be to school Annie through twelfth grade?”
Before he could answer, Annie jumped in. “It’s not that. I can’t stay in Thompkin. Don’t you see? I don’t know what Travis’s mama would do if she found out.” She strove for inner calm. “I know something about the way the Quincy Legacy works. Travis told me a few years ago. The first-born son is the Quincy Heir.”
She laid protective hands over her stomach. “If I’m carrying a boy, he’ll be the next heir after Travis. Now do you understand?”
“Oh, Annie.” Her mama scooted her chair close enough to hug her. “I see what you mean.” She stroked Annie’s hair, then eased away and touched her cheek to gain her attention. “But you can’t hide. Sooner or later you’d have to come home. And what about Travis?”
“No. You can’t tell him! Promise me!” She clutched Mama’s arm for emphasis.
Her daddy gazed at her with sadness in his dark eyes. “Travis will need to know, honey. Wait.” He put up his hand as she started to protest. “Listen to what I have to say. This baby will be a Quincy. Travis does have a right to know he’s going to be a father. Even if the two of you never end up together, nothing changes his right to be a part of the baby’s life.”
“No. I can’t take that chance yet, Daddy. Mrs. Quincy hates me. She could threaten the baby. I’m too young to fight her if she decided to sue for custody. She’s got the kind of money to buy whatever she wants. What if she wants my baby? I wouldn’t stand a chance against her.” Her voice threaded out to a whisper. “If I have a boy, God only knows what she would do.”
She met her parents’ worry with new resolve. “You have to let me handle this my way. You have to tell the boys and Susan not to say a word.” She hesitated, but only for a few seconds. “I already spoke to Aunt Nan.”
At her mother’s exclamation of distress, Annie insisted, “Mama, I had to. She’s the only one who lives far enough away. I’ve never mentioned her to Travis, I guess I never thought about it. I called her yesterday. ”
In fact, her aunt showed more empathy than Annie initially gave her credit for. She loved Aunt Nan, but always felt a bit intimidated by her. Yet when Annie realized what was ahead for her and understood the urgent need to get away from Thompkin and Ruth Quincy, Aunt Nan became the obvious choice.
Travis’s baby. She still reeled from the ramifications of it and what it would mean to her life and the lives of her family. She could never regret making love with him. But oh, they should have been more careful.
She sat up straighter and moved out of her mother’s embrace. Fresh panic threatened to overwhelm her at the mere thought of what Ruth Quincy could do. And hard on the heels of that panic, the ever-present worry that Travis wouldn’t—couldn’t—fight for their love.
Carrying a few leftover coffee mugs to the sink gave her something to do. She could sense Mama’s concerned stare boring into her back as she stood there wiping her hands on a dishtowel.
She refused to kid herself that Travis would stand for her against his mother. And though trying to gain the upper hand against Ruth would buy her some time, eventually someone at Quincy Hall would discover her secret.
Turning, she faced her parents and scraped together what self-confidence she could. “I’ll leave for Roanoke in two weeks. I promise I’ll call you every day. I’ll write, too. Maybe I can talk Aunt Nan into getting a computer, so I’ll have email. I can create a fake name and everything.” Her chin wobbled, then firmed in a smile she hoped would reassure them.
When her daddy opened his arms, Annie ran to him.
November
Five days after Thanksgiving, Susan sat next to Annie in the back seat of her parents’ old station wagon and watched some of the pedestrians who bustled around downtown Roanoke. Occasionally, she turned to glance in concern at Annie.
It was finally sinking in. She was going to be an aunt.
Aunt Susan. It was surreal, that’s what it was.
An hour ago they all viewed the ultrasound monitor, talking in hushed tones. There was no mistake. Susan hoped and prayed for a girl. So had Mama and Daddy. If Annie had a girl, the Quincys would probably leave her in peace. However, Annie carried a boy.
Damn. Susan wanted to scream aloud at the unfairness of it all, but anger was pointless now.
“It’ll be all right.” Annie’s soft assurance brought Susan out of her dark thoughts. She turned toward her sister and formed a half smile as Annie gave her a thumbs-up sign. Susan caught hold of the thumb and twisted it playfully. They sat for a while, listening to the traffic outside and the low rise and fall of their parents’ voices in the front seat.
“Aunt Nan says you’re almost ready to take your final exam.” Susan played with Annie’s fingers as she spoke. With relief, she noticed Annie had finally taken off Travis’s ring, though she’d bet the stupid thing would end up on a chain around Annie’s neck. Her sister could be such a hopeless romantic.
“Yep. I can’t wait. Did I mention I already have a job lined up at the college bookstore? It’s minimum wage, but I can have all the hours I want. And I applied for a scholarship to Hollins.” Annie rubbed a hand over her stomach. It was getting rounder, although privately Susan thought she could do with a little more weight. Annie had always been petite and slender.
“Just so long as you don’t overdo it. You’re not Superwoman.”
Annie chuckled. “Don’t I know it.”
They both avoided talking about the obvious: the sex of the baby. Nobody had said much in the examining room while they watched the ultrasound. And in truth, what was there to say? Annie would stay in Roanoke indefinitely, and the family agreed to keep her secret.
“You know, there’s been a few times in the past six months when I’d have loved to get right up in Travis’s face and ask him what he thought he was doing, treating you the way he did.” At Annie’s sound of protest, Susan shrugged. “Well, that’s how I feel.” She glanced sideways at Annie. “He lied to you. First lie, hundredth lie, makes no difference. I used to really admire him, too.”