Pushing Up Daisies (13 page)

Daisy sat on the sofa in the living area, smiling smugly at her accomplishment. So what if it wasn’t their home in Staten Island…it would do. The eggshell-colored satin paint gave the apartment a clean, warm feeling. She hated that Jay would have to sleep in the room off the kitchen, but she refused to put him close to the front door and the street.

Daisy had managed to give the place a homey feel, but it didn’t feel safe at night. By day, it was quiet, but in the evenings it was loud and rambunctious, and filled with loiterers. She’d complained to Mrs. Janowski, only to be told that all the tenants had the same complaint. Daisy even called the police on several occasions to report the noise, to no avail. Apparently, a bunch of street people had decided to squat in front of their building. Mrs. Janowski assured her that they wouldn’t stay long; they tended to move from block to block. Whenever the police ran them off from one location, they’d find another place to congregate.

Still, Daisy tried to take solace within her own four walls. As long as she and Jay went out for what they needed during the day, they didn’t have to go out at night. She just wished her apartment didn’t face the front. More than that, she wished that she could catch up to Ming Li. She hadn’t spoken to her since Jay had told her what had happened that night Daisy wasn’t there. According to Gigi, Ming Li was out of town with Lucian. Eventually, I’ll catch up to her, Daisy thought.

A knock on the front door snapped Daisy out of her thoughts and off the sofa that doubled as her bed. It had to be Mrs. Janowski. Anyone else would have needed to be buzzed in. “I’m coming, Mrs. J.,” she hollered, then smiled. Mrs. Janowski had become as much of a presence in the apartment as the new paint. She was obviously old and lonely, needed someone to talk to as much as Daisy did.

But when she opened the door, Daisy got a surprise: Marcus.

“What do you want?” she asked.

“I need to talk to you. Can I come in?”

Reluctantly, she opened the door.

“I came to explain.”

She had better things to do besides listen to a grown man plead his case, but she decided to hear him out. “I’m listening.”

“Daisy, I don’t know where to begin. I know sorry isn’t enough.”

“No, it isn’t,” Daisy said drily, sitting down on the sofa. “So why don’t you just tell me the truth, Marcus? The truth shouldn’t require a lot of thought, so how about you start explaining?”

He grabbed her hand. “Daisy, I never meant to hurt you. Never. I just got caught in the middle. I mean, what was I supposed to do? You were my friend, and so was Jasper—”

Daisy snatched her hand away. “Yes, I was your friend, Marcus. I thought that meant something.”

“Daisy, it did—it does. Believe me. I didn’t know about Jasper being married until recently, about a year before—”

“A year? You knew for three hundred and sixty-five days and couldn’t take just one minute out of one day to tell me?”

“Daisy, put yourself in my shoes for a minute. Last year we were out in Jersey and this lady comes up and kisses Jasper on the cheek. I thought it was you—”

“I know, Marcus,” she interrupted. “I saw Camille already. I know we look alike. Don’t act like you don’t know.”

Marcus nodded. “Fair enough. But as I was saying, I thought she was you. I grabbed her and hugged her, and she pushed me back. It shocked me. I almost called her by your name, but Jasper interrupted me and introduced her as his wife. I was burnt, Daisy. Truly pissed.”

“So why didn’t you tell me then?”

“What was I supposed to say? ‘Daisy, the man you’ve been with for years is married to another woman who looks like your twin?’ Everybody knew Jasper was your world. I didn’t want to be the one to shatter it for you.”

Daisy stood. “So you mean to tell me that you were willing to just sacrifice our relationship, that Jasper’s friendship meant more to you—”

“No, what I’m saying is that no matter what I told you, you wouldn’t have believed me.”

Daisy wiped a tear from her eye. “That’s asinine.”

“It’s true.”

“But the house…you showed her where we lived.”

“No. When Jasper passed, all his affairs had to be settled—you know, his estate: properties, bills, and so forth. When Jasper’s lawyer gave Camille the paperwork, she discovered the property listed under Jasper’s assets.”

“The Escalade?”

“She had it towed from my apartment. I didn’t even know it was gone until she called to inform me that she had a wrecker pick it up.”

“I don’t know, Marcus,” Daisy said, running her fingers through her hair. “This is all too smooth for me. It just doesn’t ring true.”

“So what am I to do, Daisy? If I don’t tell you the truth, I’m wrong. If I do tell you, I’m still wrong.”

Daisy’s eyes dropped to the floor. Marcus was right. She bit her lip, trying to fight back the tears, but it was a losing battle. Marcus scooted closer to her and tried to kiss her on the forehead, but she flinched and pushed him away.

“Well, I guess I should go. I love you, Daisy. You’ve been like a little sister to me, and I honor that. I’m sorry I hurt you, but I can tell that you’re not ready to forgive me. I’ll give you some time. I’m here, always remember that.” Marcus turned to get up.

Daisy stood up. “It’s not a problem. I’m over Jasper. I’ve moved on, and I’m with someone else. As a matter of fact, he and Jay are at the movies right now. Jasper wasn’t man enough to make sure his son was taken care of. And now I’ve finally found someone who wants me as much as I want him.”

“Want who?” Marcus interrupted.

“It’s none of your business. But if you must know—and I can’t believe no one has told you—Adonis.”

“It’s not going to happen, Daisy.”

“Excuse me? What did you just say? I know you didn’t just sit here in my apartment and try to tell me—”

“What about Jasper? I thought you loved him
so much.
The man’s body isn’t even cold yet, and you’re plotting your life with Adonis?”

“Let’s get something straight here, Marcus. I can do whatever and whomever I want. Furthermore, get your facts straight. I wasn’t plotting out anything with anybody.
But,
if I were, that’s my business. Yes, Jasper’s gone, and, no, he hasn’t been dead long. But even if he were here, he still wouldn’t be doing right by me. Did you forget that, Marcus? Did you forget how your friend played me, how he left us with no money and no home? We won’t even talk about all the shit that Jay’s going to have to contend with when he gets older.”

“You and Adonis…” Marcus shook his head. “It’s not going to happen. How many times are you going to play the fool? Adonis is engaged, Daisy. Engaged.”

U
nable to reach Adonis by phone, Daisy went to his apartment building. She seethed, wanting to ring his neck just as she’d rung his line. The click of her heels against the clay-colored stone floor echoed frustration.
He knows I’ve already been played like a fiddle once. Who the hell is he? The accompaniment?
Pacing fluidly between the entry and the ornately carved limestone bench in the center of the lobby, she rubbed her hands on her jeans and nodded at the doorman for the umpteenth time.
How dare Adonis take Jay out for the day and pretend to be someone he wasn’t?
Yes, he was a man, and a gorgeous one at that, Daisy admitted. But he was somebody else’s.

Starting to feel as though the walls were closing in on her, she stepped out into the street for some air. Gratefully, she inhaled the cool breeze, which was quickly becoming a wild, gusty wind. Looking into the sky, she noticed the clouds rushing together.
Perfect,
she thought.
A storm.
Just what she needed: more tension. If it thundered, she’d be up all night comforting Jay.

She removed a candy bar from her pocket, opened it, and bit into it. Three more bites and it was finished. She’d been craving chocolate for the past five days, and she was retaining water. As inconspicuously as she could, she reached down and unfastened her pants, careful to make sure her shirt covered them. Her stomach ached, and a dreadful heat warmed her lower abdomen. Adonis had truly picked the wrong time to piss her off. Pushed too hard, a bloated, PMS-ing woman could be deadly.

“Hey, you,” she heard Adonis’s voice calling from behind.

She turned, sneering, “How dare you?” She hurried up to them and took Jay by the hand. “The next time you want to play nice guy, become an actor. Your show’s already old.”

Adonis held his hands up in surrender. “What are you talking about?” he asked, looking genuinely surprised.

“We don’t need sympathy,” Daisy said, just as the rain began pouring down violently. She shielded Jay with her jacket, then went on, “You don’t have to be kind to us. He’s not an experiment. This isn’t the Boy Scouts, and you won’t get a badge for being a Good Samaritan. So from now on, if you want to do a good deed, do one for your fiancée.” Daisy turned to walk away.

“Who?”

“Your fiancée—the woman you’re going to marry.”

“Christy?”

Daisy turned back to him, eyes blazing. His were bulging. Obviously, she had caught him by surprise. He stood stock-still, as if his feet were glued to the ground. “Oh, you forgot your fiancée already? Just stay the hell away from us!”

Propped on a few throw pillows, Daisy relaxed on the sofa with a warm comforter around her. Staring absently at the wall as the television watched her, she waited for the double dose of Midol to kick in. She wasn’t one for pain and didn’t care what the recommended dosage was. She needed immediate relief, not only from cramps, but from the strain.

She heard Jay padding around in his so-called bedroom.
It’s about time.
She needed to shower, and she assumed that he was now very clean; he’d been in the bathtub for over an hour. The wind whistled, and the window rattled. Daisy felt a slight breeze slip through the cracks. Wrapping the comforter tightly around her, she got up to make hot chocolate. Then a loud bump coming from Jay’s area startled her.

“Jay? You all right?” She walked toward his room and saw something fly past before she could reach the doorway.

“I hate,” he said, throwing another ball, “being here!” He started crying like a baby.

Daisy wasn’t ready for a tantrum, and she didn’t know how to console him if he was ranting about Jasper. “What’s the matter, baby?” She reached out to hold him.

He pulled away. “Why does
every
body keep leaving me? Why’d you tell Adonis not to talk to us anymore? I bet you said the same thing to Dad, and that’s why he died. You probably killed him!”

Daisy held her breath.
Not today.
The pain reliever hadn’t kicked in yet, and she was just as irritable as Jay was. “Listen. Not right now, okay? I’ll explain later. It’s an adult thing. Now, pick up this stuff and we’ll have some hot chocolate and watch a movie.”

She turned away, hoping the strategy she’d seen on TV would work. The show’s host had said that if the parent ignored the child’s tantrums, the child would eventually realize that his actions were pointless.

Not Jay. He cupped his ears and hollered as loud as he could. “It’s your fault!” he cried, pointing. “Yours!”

Daisy stood quietly and counted to ten, trying to calm her nerves.
If you don’t pick up this mess and clean this room, I’m going to bounce your ass like that basketball you just threw
was what she thought, but she said, “I said clean up your room, Jay. Now!”

“I’m not picking up a
damn
thing.” He ran into the living area.

“Jay, if you don’t do as I say
and
apologize, I’m going to warm your ass.”

Jay ran out of the apartment and into the rain, with Daisy trailing right behind him.

She jogged out into the heavy downpour, clutching her robe around her. The drops pelted her skin and seeped into her eyes. She could only see a few feet in front of her. Turning corner after corner, ignoring catcall after catcall from the loiterers, she pushed on. Rocks, and what she assumed to be crack vials, crunched under her feet as she continued searching in the dark. She had to find Jay.

Stopping to catch her breath, she leaned against a doorway, clutching her chest. Anxiety attacked her, rushed through her like the violent shower that blurred her sight. She couldn’t afford to let it get the best of her. Wouldn’t. She shook her head, rebuking the panic like the demon that it was. “Not now, damnit!” she ordered. She looked around and realized that she had no idea where she was. Gathering her composure, she headed back into the storm toward the nearest street sign, hoping she’d spot Jay.

Daisy sat on the radiator and vigorously rubbed her hands on her arms, warming herself as she looked out the window. She’d run in the rain for over forty-five minutes, searching for Jay, before she’d given up. She racked her brain.
Where did he disappear to so quickly?
It was as if he’d vanished the moment he stepped out the door.

She knew she should have phoned the police, but instead she’d called Gigi, who had taken it upon herself to bring the whole crew. Under normal circumstances, Daisy would have protested, but she needed them—even Marcus and Ming Li.
I’ll talk to Ming Li later,
Daisy promised herself.

“Does he know anyone in the neighborhood?” Gigi asked.

Daisy shook her head.

“Well, he’s not upstairs. Your landlady said she hasn’t seen him since yesterday.”

“I don’t know where he’s at, where he could be. It was like one minute he was in front of me, and the next…” Daisy shrugged.

Gigi patted her gently on the back. “Marcus will find him…let’s hope.”

“I’m going to stand on the stoop and try to spot them,” Ming Li said.

“Ming Li, you don’t have to go outside.”

Ming Li held up a cigar.

“Don’t worry about it,” Daisy said, beginning to cry as she sat down on the sofa. “Just smoke in here. Give me a sip of your liquor. I know you have some on you.”

Gigi sat next to Daisy and hugged her. “It’ll be all right.”

Ming Li pulled a bag from her knapsack. “Actually, I have a whole bottle. I was just coming out of the liquor store when Gigi called.”

Daisy wiped her eyes. “Give me one of those cigars too. I need something to do with my hands.” She held them up to show they were trembling.

Ming Li gave Daisy a glass and a Monte Cristo, then put a palm on her forehead. “Damn, you’re burning up.”

Gigi got up and started toward the back. “I’ll get you some medicine,” she said, then turned back to Ming Li. “Ming Li, go in the closet and get Daisy some dry clothes.”

Daisy sat and cried. She couldn’t lose Jay. What if something had happened to him? But then, she thought, he could be okay. He had disappeared quickly; maybe he had someplace to go. She gulped down the cognac and pulled nervously on the cigar. She didn’t feel the burn in her throat or taste the smoke. Numbness engulfed her.

The front door opened and Marcus walked in. He was as wet as she’d been when she’d first come in. “I don’t know where he’s at. I searched for blocks, went into every store, walked through an alley.” He shook his head. “Nowhere.”

Daisy jumped from her seat and stubbed the cigar out in a plant. She began to pace frantically, to the window and back. Panic raced through her, digging up a memory. She’d felt the same way the night that Jasper hadn’t come home.

“Go change, Daisy,” Ming Li instructed, while Gigi gave her a small dosage cup to drink.

“I guess I should.” Daisy walked toward the bathroom. “I have to get back out there and find Jay.”

“I’ll go back out,” Marcus said, then left.

Daisy sat on the closed commode with her head in her hands and listened through the doorway. Gigi and Ming Li were discussing what should be done. Apparently, they’d both decided that Daisy and Jay had no business living in that environment.
Gigi means well, but Ming Li’s got her nerve. Who’d made her the authority on children all of a sudden?

Daisy flung open the door, charging into the living area. She glared. “How dare you sit in my house and say that we shouldn’t live here! It may not be upscale—hell, it may not even be comfortable—but it’s ours. Jay’s had a better life here. At least he doesn’t have to hear you fucking all night. And, no, he’s not allowed to watch people fucking on television, either.”

“What?” Ming Li said, glaring back at her.

“Y’all stop. It’s not the time for that,” Gigi interjected.

“I said, Ming Li, that he’s safe here. He’s not huddled up in a corner, thinking that someone died because he heard moaning and screaming all night.”

“Well, excuse me for thinking I could screw in my own house—”

“It’s not about whether you can screw in your home or not. It’s that you volunteered to babysit him, and then not only had him around one of your countless men, but couldn’t control your hormones. I can’t say who can or can’t visit you in your house. But I can say, and any other responsible adult would agree, that a child shouldn’t be subjected to hearing adults fuck. What part of that is healthy?”

Gigi waved her hand in defeat. “Well, y’all just get it all out…get it over with.”

Ming Li’s face flushed red with anger. “Responsible? I know you’re not lecturing me on responsibility. Maybe you need to find another word, because you’re talking about something that you know nothing of. You sat on your ass for years and let someone dictate your life. You didn’t have a job, never paid a bill, and didn’t bring anything to the table but your appetite. But
you’re
responsible? Please! Jasper owned you from your panties to your pedicures. On top of that he used you—”

“Used me for what? Since you claim that I didn’t have anything, what could he possibly have used me for?”

“To raise his—no, I take that back—to raise
someone else’s
son.”