Rainbow Blues (8 page)

“Twenty-four.”

Jimmy flopped back on the bed, laughing. “Oh my God. As soon as you mentioned a son, I’ve been grappling with the concept of dating a guy with a kid. It’s a big responsibility and all, and I was worried about how it would all shake out, assuming we get serious. But I thought he was, like, ten. Maybe fifteen at the most.”

Relief flooded Luke. Not only was Jimmy assuming they’d be continuing this relationship, but the odd moments of hesitation he’d sensed in Jimmy could easily be attributed to his concern over Luke’s son.

“Nope. Zach is all raised up and on his own. Well, he graduates from college this year, and has a scholarship for grad school next year. Assuming he keeps his grades up, I won’t be on the hook for any more tuition, but I’m prepared if he needs it. I try to see him every weekend, if his schedule allows. Dinner or something. Sometimes catching a game. This week, it’s brunch on Sunday.”

“I guess you won’t need any advice from me about dealing with a sullen teenaged boy.”

Luke laughed. “Nope, although I could have used some back then. He could be a moody son of a bitch. Thankfully that’s long past.” Luke bit his lip. Maybe it was too soon to admit this to a man he’d only known a few hours, but those hours had been just about perfect, and the man himself was… right, somehow. Right for him, he was almost certain, and he wanted to find out where they could go, together. “I’d like you to meet him.”

“Meet him?” Jimmy gulped. “You don’t mean already, do you?”

“Well, no. But if you’re serious about seeing where this goes, probably pretty soon.”

Jimmy rolled over, draping himself over Luke’s chest, his slowly thickening cock nudging Luke’s hip. “I’m serious. I don’t want one-night stands, and I like what I know about you. I think we could be good together. But I think we need to stop talking about your kid before I feel like a total perv.”

“We can do that.”

Luke kissed Jimmy and let himself revel in a slightly less frantic encounter with his new lover.

W
ITH
HIS
arms wrapped around a nice warm body, Luke drowsed in those comfortable moments prior to falling asleep. The scent of Jimmy’s clean sweat and the musky scent of their sex lulled him into a deep contentment. It had been so long since he’d fallen asleep tangled up next to someone. He wanted to say he missed it, but lying next to Jimmy, skin to skin, the hard planes of their bodies merging like they were meant to be, well… he’d never had this. He’d missed the facsimile he had when he and Kelly were still pretending to be a couple. But this… if this was what it would be like having a lover like Jimmy, he wasn’t going to want to live without this.

Underneath Luke’s arm, Jimmy’s breathing became slow and regular, his skin warm, and Luke imagined he could feel the slow, steady thump of his heartbeat.

Slowly, Luke sank closer to sleep. Until a phone blared some music he didn’t recognize, and Jimmy sat straight up.

“What?” The word slurred out Luke’s mouth. “What’s wrong?”

Jimmy glanced at the clock, which displayed the ungodly hour of three in the morning, before leaping to grab his cellphone.

“Damian?” Jimmy didn’t sound nearly as awake as he appeared as he stumbled naked out of the bedroom.

Who the fuck was Damian?

Luke debated waiting in the bedroom. After the connection he and Jimmy had made—or he imagined they’d made—was Luke going to find out that Jimmy already had a man in his life? Surely no one in their right mind would be making booty calls in the aftermath of the snowstorm that had paralyzed half the city.

Perhaps it was insufferably rude, but Luke had to know. The evening with Jimmy had been so perfect, he had to know—right now—if he’d been imagining it all.

Jimmy murmured into the phone while making his way to the next room—an office. He sat down at a desk and opened a laptop. Luke stood in the doorway, watching, but he wasn’t able to hear enough of Jimmy’s side of the conversation to figure out what was going on and why some guy named Damian would be calling Jimmy in the middle of the night. There was nothing in Jimmy’s demeanor that would indicate an emergency or a death, which is what Luke always assumed when the phone rang in the middle of the night.

After a few minutes clicking on his computer, Jimmy sucked in a breath, his whole body vibrating as he read something on the screen.

“Thanks, Damian.” Jimmy let the phone drop on his desk, and he spun around, catching sight of Luke.

The smile on Jimmy’s face was like he’d won the lottery, and Luke couldn’t help but smile back. Then Jimmy launched himself out of the chair, right for Luke.

Wrapping his arms around Luke, Jimmy kissed him, a quick smack before he pulled back. “We’re a hit!”

“A hit?” What was Jimmy talking about?

“The show! There are about half a dozen reviews posted, and they’re all great.”

“That’s awesome, Jimmy. I’m not surprised, mind you. You were stunning.”

Jimmy grinned and kissed him again. This time, when their lips parted, Luke had a question. “Why did that guy call in the middle of the night? Isn’t that kinda weird?”

Even if Damian wasn’t making a booty call, was there some reason, some history between the two men that made him comfortable enough to call Jimmy at any time?

“No, not really.” Jimmy led him back into the bedroom. “I mean, Damian’s my best friend, and I’ve had to bail him out of some sticky situations in the middle of the night. But on opening night, this isn’t late. Normally, the cast will hang out together somewhere and wait until the reviews are posted. Back in the day, it was the morning paper, but now there are reviews much earlier online.”

Oh God. “Why didn’t you say something? We could have… gone out a different day.” Luke had been so caught up in the gut-punch of attraction for Jimmy it had never occurred to him that he was being selfish by giving in to his desire for Jimmy.

Jimmy wiggled his eyebrows and pulled Luke down on the bed. “Don’t be ridiculous. With the storm coming in, we’d already decided it would be better not to have our customary cast party. Even so, the second I realized you were gay and interested, I wasn’t going to let you get away that easy.”

Oh? If he hadn’t already come twice tonight, those words would have him raring to go again. He kissed Jimmy, long and thorough, and his cock gave a valiant effort to revive, but failed.

“Mmmm. I’m wired from those reviews, and you’re sexy as hell, but….” Jimmy glanced down at his groin. “The flesh isn’t as willing as I’d like.”

Luke chuckled. “Mine neither. Rain check?”

“I’ll hold you to it. But I don’t think I’ll be able to get back to sleep right away. If you’re tired, I can just go watch television.”

The thought of sleeping by himself in Jimmy’s bed… was better than sleeping by himself in his own bed, but he wanted Jimmy with him. “What about a nice long shower? We can get properly cleaned up, and the heat and steam might get you sleepy again.”

“You are brilliant.” Jimmy bounded out of bed, and Luke followed. Jimmy was getting a kiss for that; it wasn’t often people told Luke he was brilliant. Of course, if Jimmy was as sexy in the shower as he was out of it, Luke might be able to accommodate with a little more than a kiss.

L
UKE
STRETCHED
and kept his eyes closed, trying to hold on to sleep just a little longer, despite the light banging on his eyelids. The scent of Jimmy, indelibly imprinted on his brain after only one night, permeated the sheets. Flipping over, he buried his nose in the pillow and inhaled like a lovesick teenager. But he didn’t have to moon over Jimmy’s scent. Not when he could kiss and touch and taste the man himself. Eyes still closed, he reached out… and reached out. The sheets might still smell like Jimmy, but they were cold from a man who’d long since awoken.

Some of Luke’s comfort bled away. Sitting up, he opened his eyes. Jimmy was nowhere to be seen, and Luke had slept in later than he usually did at his apartment. A couple of energetic orgasms with another person were better than any sleeping pill ever invented. Waking up alone, though, was unexpected. The door to the bedroom was shut, and Luke was certain they’d left it open after their midnight shower.

Without Jimmy’s facial expressions to guide him, Luke was lost. Was he supposed to wait here? Leave? They hadn’t exchanged numbers, but if Luke had imagined the connection between them last night, maybe that’s what Jimmy wanted. In the cold light of day, Luke found it easy to understand if he’d misread the situation. After all, having an emotional connection so quickly was impossible, wasn’t it? That didn’t stop the jagged wrench of grief at the loss of something special, no matter how briefly he’d thought it had been a part of his life. Stupid. He was too old for this nonsense. Falling in love was something for young people. Boyfriends were for other people, not someone who’d been so repressed his whole adult life he was imagining hearts and flowers and forever after one spectacular one-night stand.

As he yanked on his clothes, he took a closer look at the mounds of snow outside the window. It was going to be a fucking pain to get a cab or trudge through all that snow to pick up his car, but he’d remember this lesson for next time. Like he’d told his son many times over the years, mistakes were regrettable but even worse would be not to learn from them. Luke would learn not to get so invested.

Right now, he was tempted to go home and burn the dress pants and expensive sweater Zach had made him buy for the play, since he’d been adamant Luke couldn’t attend in his customary jeans and T-shirt combo. Stupid, yes, because just as he’d rationalized when he purchased it, there were other places he’d be able to wear the outfit, like Zach’s upcoming graduation.

He raked his fingers through his hair and took a deep breath. This uncertainty was ridiculous. Even if he’d misread the situation, the only one who’d know it was him.

Didn’t stop him from noting the nice, homey touches Jimmy had made to his bedroom. Jimmy’s place wasn’t much better than the concrete bunker masquerading as Luke’s apartment, and yet, Jimmy’s didn’t seem quite as dreary. It wouldn’t kill Luke to buy a couple of paintings and a few colorful blankets.

With one last look around the room to make sure he hadn’t left anything behind, Luke drew in a deep breath and opened the door.

Music spilled out, cheery and bouncy. Luke wasn’t sure if the tune was familiar because it was something Zach and Ryan listened to in his presence or if he’d maybe just heard it on the radio. Frowning, he walked down the hall. He still needed his coat before he could leave.

Standing in the entryway beside the radiator where Jimmy had hung his jacket last night, Luke had a perfect view into the kitchen.

Shaking his lanky body, Jimmy stood by the stove and sang along to the fluffy pop song. No wonder he’d assumed Jimmy was so much younger. Between the guy’s energy and his upbeat and positive attitude, it was like he hadn’t aged past twenty, and Luke could only admire that.

Jimmy wore nothing but a pair of tiny red briefs and the ass beneath… one night wasn’t nearly enough time to have properly worshipped it. He salivated at the thought and ran his tongue along his teeth. Maybe just one last bite before he left?

Without taking his eyes off that firm ass, Luke reached out a hand for his coat and ended up knocking an umbrella to the floor. Both he and Jimmy jumped from the sudden clatter.

Jimmy whirled, and a huge smile split his face. “You’re awake. I was making breakfast. We can eat out here or we can….” The smile fell away, and his eyebrows drew together. “You’re dressed. Why are you dressed?”

With those few words, Luke’s insecurities melted away. Jimmy hadn’t been expecting him to leave. Hadn’t expected him to leave the bed even. Luke hadn’t misread things the previous night. But Jimmy’s frown deepened as the silence lengthened, and he had to answer Jimmy somehow. Please let him figure out how to answer without fucking this up any more than he’d done already.

He dropped his gaze to the floor, but raised it again when Jimmy sucked in an audible breath. Jimmy looked… crushed. There was no other word for it. Without any thought for himself, Luke closed the distance between them. Despite knowing Jimmy for less than twenty-four hours, one undeniable fact had lodged itself in the depths of Luke’s soul—a sad Jimmy was something that shouldn’t exist in this world.

Like they’d practiced for years, Jimmy flowed into Luke’s arms, fitting against him perfectly, solid and warm.

Jimmy pressed his face to Luke’s neck and mumbled something.

“What was that?” Luke asked gently.

“I thought you were… trying to sneak out.” Jimmy still wasn’t looking at him but had pulled back enough so his words were audible.

If Jimmy hadn’t turned around, yeah, he might have snuck out, like the coward he apparently was when it came to guys. “I thought you wanted me to go.”

This time, Jimmy did raise his head. “Why would you think that? I mean….” Jimmy breathed deeply. “I thought we’d agreed last night we were going to spend the day together.”

Luke slid his hands up from Jimmy’s waist and cupped that narrow-boned face, so unlike the broad planes of his own. Stereotypically, men didn’t like to talk about their feelings or weren’t willing to commit. He might even scare Jimmy off, but he’d spent so much of his life concealing his innermost thoughts and desires. So much time afraid of being himself. The spike of uncertainty when he’d woken alone had only cemented his resolve to stop hiding. If it scared Jimmy off, so be it, but he was too fucking old to play games.