Real Vampires Know Hips Happen (19 page)

Read Real Vampires Know Hips Happen Online

Authors: Gerry Bartlett

Tags: #Vampires

My stomach gurgled and I was suddenly afraid Mars had lied. Luckily the only thing I suffered was embarrassment when I tried to swallow a burp. Mars just laughed when I quickly covered my mouth with my napkin.

“I love to see a woman who appreciates her food. It was my pleasure.” He held up his glass, which had never seemed to grow empty. But then neither had mine though I’d drunk steadily. In fact, the room was swaying a little. “A toast. To firsts.”

“Firsts?” I let him clink glasses with mine but waited for an explanation.

“Your first meal with me. The first time I’ve sat like this with a woman and not lifted her skirt before dessert.” His grin was wicked. “You do want dessert, don’t you?” He nodded and a servant entered with a chocolate cake that I could smell from across the room.

“Now you’re just torturing me. I was sure I couldn’t eat another bite.” I rubbed my stomach. For chocolate, I’d make room. He cut a big slice of cake, chocolate through and through, and handed me a plate. Before I could pick up a fork, he broke off a piece and brought it to my lips.

“Open for me, Gloriana.” His voice had dropped to a husky demand.

“Mars.” I didn’t like the look in his eyes but couldn’t help myself. My lips closed over the delicate cake and frosting. Before I could stop myself I’d licked his fingers clean. Bad, Glory.

“One kiss. Just to see how a vampire tastes. Humor me.” He leaned in and I saw a touch of chocolate on his lower lip. It was enough for me.

“One. Then I must go.” I met his lips with mine, more intent on getting to that chocolate than on the kissing part. But he was a wily creature. He slipped his hand to the back of my head and moved his mouth over mine. He wasn’t just a god who was an expert on violence. Obviously he had a passionate nature as well. He toyed with me, explored my fangs and seemed to like the novelty as his tongue roamed through my mouth.

I was too far gone with the whiskey to do more than hold his shoulders, trying to keep some space between us. Before I knew it I’d jammed my fingers into his soft curls. His beard was soft too and tickled my face but in a pleasantly sensual way that encouraged me to keep this going.

“No!” I shoved him away, suddenly finding my sense when he slid his hand down to cup my breast. “I am not going to Olympus. No matter what you offer.”

“Really?” He stood and his shield, which had never been far from his hand, suddenly leaped into it. Magic. His spear moved too and he gripped it with his other hand. “This coy act isn’t as cute as you think it is. I find it irritating.” He gestured with his shield and suddenly everything on the table crashed to the floor. I jumped up and backed away. Obviously Mars had a temper.

“It’s not an act. I’m happy here on Earth. I have a vampire lover who I will not betray.”
Again.
“My mother must have misrepresented the situation.” I thought about dematerializing but one gesture from Mars and every power I had deserted me. Damned Olympus magic.

“I can take care of that vampire lover. It will be my pleasure.”
He gestured with his spear. “Your mother claims he was once a warrior. Though I’m sure he will be no match for me, I could enjoy a moment or two of sport with him before I take his head.” His grin reminded me of someone who thought drowning kittens would be a good afternoon’s entertainment.

“You won’t touch him.” I picked up an apple which had rolled across the floor and threw it at him. In a display of finesse, he caught it on the end of his spear. Show off.

“I will if I want to.” Now he sounded like a petulant little boy.

“Really? Is that all you have to occupy your time? Take women who don’t want you and kill vampires, who my mother assures me are well beneath your notice?” I lobbed a golden squash that had been used as part of the centerpiece at his head. This he slashed in two, dead center. I swallowed at his perfect coordination and the sharpness of his blade.

“It’s true I usually consider them little more than earthly roadkill.” He laughed, cracking himself up. “Get it? Dead, undead?”

“You think mocking what I am is scoring you points?” I really wanted to snatch his helmet off the table and break his plume.

“Watch it, woman.” He set the helmet firmly back on his head with a scowl. Then he slashed his spear through the chair that stood between us. Sparks flew, the chair fell apart, and I realized he had more than a sharp blade in that spear.

I dashed to the other side of the room. “Don’t you have real work to do, Mars? Right now in several parts of the world there are real wars going on. Bloody, hellacious ones. I’m sure you can find some interesting action there.” I saw him stalking me, kicking scattered fruit and dishes out of his way. He could paralyze me no doubt, like my mother could, but he probably didn’t consider that sporting.

“I told your mother I’d try to get you to Olympus. I find that an interesting challenge.” He leaped on top of the table.
“Admit it, Gloriana. You enjoyed that kiss. You were tempted by the feast.”

I had nowhere to run. He dropped down to within a foot of me, his eyes ablaze with the need to win. I recognized it; hadn’t I seen it in Jerry’s eyes when he’d fought in the past? I dared reach out to touch Mars’s chest. He was hard and warm, breathing rapidly and excited by my resistance. My fingers were shaking because I knew just how helpless I was to fight him.

“Are you the kind of warrior who carries away women as the spoils of war? Is pillaging and rape part of your scene?”

“You dare!” The blast of power from him knocked me flat on my back. I lay there for a moment, stunned. “I have never raped a woman in my life.”

“Well, that’s the only way you’re going to get me back to Olympus as your, um, consort.” I shook my head to clear it. Whoa. Whatever he’d unleashed in his temper fit had hit me like a body blow.

“To hell with you then.” He turned on his heel, throwing out his arms and sending the contents of the room into a swirl of destruction that left everything in bits and pieces. I held my hands over my head to keep from getting hit.

“Mars, please. I’m sorry, but I told my mother I wasn’t interested. It’s not you, it’s me.”

“Zeus’s toenail, woman, I can’t believe you just said that.” He whipped around, his spear close to my chest.

“It’s the truth. You want to be mad at someone, be mad at my mother. I…I like you. You’re charming when you’re not throwing a temper tantrum.” I got slowly to my feet, being careful of that really sharp blade. “And you gave me a wonderful gift.” I glanced at the total disaster of the room. “A meal I’ll never forget.”

“You are very like your mother, Gloriana. Most women after what I just did would be a sniveling heap on the floor.” He lowered his spear. “Damned if I don’t think I like you. Your warrior is a lucky man.”

“Uh, thank you.”

He smiled. “I only wore my old battle gear tonight to impress you. I can tell you like it.” He stepped closer, back to flirtation.

I held up my hand in a classic stop gesture. “Mars, I can’t go to Olympus. But my mother told me she has to follow through on whatever she promised you no matter what I decide tonight. Is that true?” I smiled to take the sting out of that, relieved when he seemed to take what I said calmly.

“Yes, it is. And she won’t tell anyone you turned me down.” He nodded. “I have some secrets of hers that I can use as leverage too.”

“There you go.” Olympus politics sounded even worse than American. “Seems like it’ll be a win for you.” I held out my hand. “Can we part as friends? I’d like to think that if I got in a spot of trouble, I could call on a powerful god like you for help. I figure we’re probably related in some way, if my research about Olympus is true. Seems like just about everyone comes from Zeus up there.” And wasn’t that an ick factor? I was afraid Mother had tried to fix me up with some really close relatives.

“Oh, yes, we’re definitely related.” He leaned his spear against the wall and took my hand. “I’d like that, Gloriana. To help you. Your mother will hate it.”

“There you go. Anything my mother hates, I love. We’re on the same page.” I gasped when he brought my hand to his lips and kissed it. “Or are we?”

“Just a courtesy, my dear.” He laughed. “I got your message. But if you ever change your mind or need me, just call my name. I will hear you.”

“What about my mother? She won’t tell me her name. Will you?” But he’d already disappeared. Damn. I turned on my heel and walked out of the room, only stopping long enough to pick up an unbroken bottle of that fine whiskey. I had a feeling Jerry would enjoy it and maybe it would help him remember something. It had certainly relaxed me and put me in the mood to jump all over him as soon as I got
back. I was feeling optimistic for the first time since he’d been stabbed. No more blind dates and my mother was supposed to be cooperating. If Mars had the magic to make me eat, then surely she could find someone with the mojo to help Jerry get his memory back.

My stomach gurgled again and I waited to see if my meal was going to reappear. No, false alarm, though I did feel like I could burp “The Star-Spangled Banner,” a trick my pal Rafe Valdez had taught me. I know, nothing to brag about.

I thought about that dense chocolate cake with the creamy frosting. Heaven on a fork. I had to admit Olympus did have its charms. Thunder boomed but I ignored it. Sorry, Mom, but I wasn’t about to give up Jerry for fine dining. And wasn’t that a revelation.

•  •  •

Two
nights had passed without a word from my mother or much progress with Jerry’s memory. Bart had tried hypnosis with Jerry again but they’d had no luck. We were leaving for Edinburgh to catch the plane the next night. Mag and Angus were unhappy about it but saw the wisdom in taking Jerry back to his more recent haunts. Plus, he could finally meet his daughter.

“I’ve got a surprise for you, Gloriana.” Jerry had seemed to regain his strength as he drank from me each night. Now he dragged me through the living room and outside into the cold night air.

“Oh?” I didn’t like surprises. History had shown me that they were usually nasty ones. A breakup. Unwelcome guests. I could go on. But Jerry’s eyes were bright with excitement so I hoped that this was a good one.

“Da and I have arranged a party for tonight. A going away bonfire and pipers are coming. Most of the clan that still lives around here are coming too.” He picked up the bottle of whiskey I had brought back from my date. I’d
explained it away, claiming my mother had given it to me as a bribe, trying to get back into my good graces. “I’ll take this with me.”

I held his hand, enjoying his firm grasp and happy smile. “Bagpipes!” I’d learned to appreciate their music long ago.

“Yes. Did you ever learn the dances here?” He swept his eyes down my outfit. I’d bought a short skirt made from the Campbell plaid in the village. I’d paired it with a low-cut black sweater and black boots. “You look ready for a jig or two.”

“Thanks, I wore it for you. Plaid isn’t my first choice. Makes my butt look big.” Now I’d done it. He turned me to check that big butt out. Of course he looked fantastic in his kilt and knee socks. Oh, but the man had great legs.

“Nonsense.” He gave my bum a friendly pat which turned into a squeeze. “I’m growing very fond of this ass. Besides, the Campbell plaid looks good on anyone.” He put his arm around my waist and pulled me close. “Are you going to dance with me?”

“You bet. I love to dance. You don’t remember but I supported myself for a while as a dancer. A few years ago. Before I moved to Austin. And when I was here last, the girls taught me some of the dances.” I grinned up at him. The air was crisp and smelled of wood smoke. This was beginning to feel like old times. “Lead the way.”

He held up the whiskey bottle. “If I drink enough, I’ll even get out the swords.”

“Oh, would you?” I kissed his cheek. “I’d love to see you sword dance. Ancient warrior style.”

“It’s the only way I remember, lass.” His smile slipped. “Come on.” He pulled me toward a clearing where we could see people milling around a large fire. Just then the pipes started. It was a merry song and a cheer went up.

“Look!” I pointed as Angus bowed to Mag, and Laird and Lady Campbell took a spot near the fire to begin a lively jig. It was fun to see them cut loose. The crowd clapped and
cheered as they whirled and turned, clasping hands and then dancing around each other. Finally, the song ended and everyone hooted and stomped their feet. Angus bowed, Mag curtsied then several other couples took their places as the music started again.

“What fun!” The voice came from the darkness. “It’s high time the Campbells entertained again.”

Jerry turned to face the couple walking from the car park next to the garage. “Mara and Davy! Well met!” He shook hands with Mara’s fiancé and kissed Mara’s cheek. “I’m leaving for America tomorrow so Da and I thought we should have some kind of send-off.”

“Leaving?” Mara’s face fell. “Are you all right? Have you got your memory back?”

“No.” Jerry glanced at the merriment around the bonfire. “I realize staying here is like living in the past. Gloriana has urged me to go where I have lived the last few years. It’s a good idea. We hope it will help me remember some of what I’ve lost.” He rested his arm on my shoulders.

“Gloriana’s idea, of course. Honestly, do you have to drag him away from his family so soon? But then I’m sure Mag and Angus won’t be sorry to see the last of you, Gloriana, will they? Too bad you’ve persuaded Jeremiah to go with you.” Mara had that pinched look around her mouth she got whenever she talked to me.

“My parents realize I need to meet our daughter. Lily, you said her name was.” Jerry tightened his arm around me.

“Yes, and she’s still in Austin. I got a text from her just yesterday. She’s wondering why she didn’t get her allowance from you this month. Apparently you’ve been supporting her, Jeremiah.” Mara frowned. “It’s ridiculous of course. She should be making her own way by now.”

“Like you did?” That popped out before I could stop myself. But the truth was Mara had married money and had never worked a day in her life.

“Gloriana, not all of us are willing to stoop as low as you
did to earn our keep.” Mara’s smile was cold. “After all, you will do anything to be independent, won’t you?”

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