Reckless Fear (The Black Vipers #1) (10 page)

“I’ll be seeing you soon. You and the rest of the Dark Riders. You’ll all die by my hand one way or another. Every single one of you will pay for the hell that Big Frank delivered to Gen one hundred times over. Make sure Maverick knows, I’m coming for him.”

I hacked one onto the patch he wore on his back and used the heel of my boot to smear it in good.

I pushed through the hallway door and into the parking garage, pulling Sasha behind me. She struggled to keep up but didn't complain. I knew she would never look at me the same again. I felt a small stab in my heart but pushed it away. That was the last thing I had time to worry about right now.

I turned the corner and stopped in my tracks. She ran ahead of me, looking over her shoulder like I’d lost my mind.

“Hurry up,” she whispered.

“That’s your car?”

I pointed to the brand new, all black and sleek as Hell, Dodge Charger.

“Come on.” She ran toward the car, looking over her shoulder to make sure I was following.

I unlocked the door with the key and she leaned inside, popping the trunk.

I slid into the driver side while she grabbed a large bag from the trunk and jumped in, holding it against her.

“This isn't exactly the car of someone who wants to stay hidden.” I said as the car roared to life.

Her eyes skimmed the underground garage for threats until finally landing on me.

“It’s not for hiding,” she said, “it’s for running.”

The underground parking for the safe house was dark and freezing. I rubbed my hands over my arms trying to warm myself.

Tight punched in the security code for the service elevator. The metal doors opened quickly and he pulled me inside.

I took a deep breath, leaning against the back wall and holding tightly to my bag. This wasn't the first time I’d been on the run. Danger liked to mix with my destiny on a regular basis. In this moment however, I felt safe and I let myself relax a small bit.

What would happen when the doors opened again was anyone’s guess.

The ride here was short but brutal. He didn’t speak, keeping his eyes focused on the road and gripping the steering wheel so hard I thought he’d leave indentations.

The elevator jerked to a stop but the doors didn’t open. Fear went off inside me like a flair. Yes, he saved me from the Dark Riders at the hospital, but he had just found out about the baby and wasn’t thinking clearly. His mind was clouded with emotion.

Bringing me here without a blindfold essentially gave him one of two choices. Kill me or keep me against my will.

I would never be allowed to live knowing the location of the safe house. After the emotional smoke cleared and he realized the hatred he had for me, the choice would be pretty clear.

I needed to figure out how to get away before that happened.

He lifted a panel in the door and punched in another security code. A loud alarm went off, announcing there was someone entering the room.

The doors opened slowly.

He stepped out as soon as he could, leaving me standing in the elevator alone.

My eyes scanned around looking for any hidden threats but in awe of what was in front of me. When we drove up to the old, rundown building, my anxieties had skyrocketed. I could not fathom how he thought this place would be safe from The Dark Riders. Now, as I stepped into the big open area that took up most of top floor, I understood.

The floor was lined with one way windows that looked in every direction. There was no way to sneak up to this building without someone knowing about it. Big screen TV’s were mounted around the room. Some flashed different camera angles from the parameter of the building while others were turned to major news channels.

Tight had disappeared into what I assumed was the master bathroom since I could hear water running. He was covered with Rip’s blood and I couldn’t blame him for wanting to get that shit off.

Goosebumps covered my body. I was stuck here. No way for me to get out. I had no idea what the code was to make the elevator work and it was too high for me to jump. I dropped my bag onto the table, grabbing my glock from inside and slipping in the clip. I would not go down without a fight. My chest constricted as I thought of what would happen to my family if I didn’t make it out of here alive.

At the safe house with Tight. No possibility of escape. Will contact when know more.

I hit send and quickly walked to the kitchen, opening every drawer until I found a meat tenderizer. I laid my phone on the counter, pounding the metal utensil onto my phone over and over until I was sure it was beyond repair.

Feeling his eyes on me, I looked up. Tight stood in the doorway watching. I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear, making no excuse for what I’d done. I lifted the gun in his direction. His eyes lingered on the gun for only a second before he started toward me.

“Stop. I won’t let you kill me. Tight, I will shoot you,” I warned as he closed the distance between us. Not one ounce of fear shown in his eyes as he approached. No concern for his life or my warning.

The air between us changed as he got closer. My throat suddenly constricted and I tried to swallow against it.  The gun I had so confidently pointed right at him, shook.

Suddenly he was there, pressing the end of the gun against his chest his eyes locked on mine. I covered my mouth with my hand, holding in a sob and laying the gun on the table.

Lifting me in his arms without saying a word, he carried me through the bedroom and into the bathroom. The room was filled with steam from the warm water running through the shower head.

Setting me down, he knelt in front of me, lifting each foot and forcing my shoes off. I grabbed at the t-shirt that stretched across his shoulders, trying to get him to stand but instead he reached up and pulled my scrub pants down.

I gasped as the air hit my bare skin. He growled as he ran his hands down the back side of my legs.

Without speaking he picked me up and stood me under the running water. I cried out, using my hands to try to block the water as it soaked my top.

“Tight, what the hell are you doing?”

He reached for the soap, and began rubbing it up and down my arms, holding me under the warm water to rinse it off.

I screamed, trying to turn my head away from shower head. “Are you crazy? What are you doing?”

“Stop fighting me,” he said.

Tears filled my eyes as the water ran over me and I struggled to get away. My voice cracked with emotion, “Why are you doing this?”

He rubbed the soap violently up and down my legs. I grabbed at his soaked shirt, trying to get him to look at me. He stood only long enough to pull the shirt up over his head and throw it to the floor.

His eyes were focused and hard. He wasn't here with me, some kind of dark emotion had taken over his mind. His neck muscles were tight and bulging. He soaped his hands again, ignoring my pleas and reached toward my neck.

I fought against him, pushing his soapy hands away. “Get the fuck away from me! What are you doing?”

He stepped inside of the shower with me and backed me against the wall.  Reaching again for my neck, he slipped his soapy hands over my neck and jaw.

Right where Rip had licked me.

I stopped fighting. His face was like stone and his hands were rough but a tear slipped down his cheek. I placed my hands over his and his frantic cleansing slowed but his eyes never left the spot where his hands were on me.

“He touched you,” he whispered.

My eyes closed and I rested my head on the wall behind me. I wished I could be his. To spend the time and understand this complicated man. I wanted to feel the warmth of belonging to him and promise of protection by any means. But I knew it could never be.

His thumb ran over my jaw line.

“He touched you and he tasted you.”

He leaned in, placing his forehead against mine.

Tears streamed down my face. “I’m alright,” I whispered.

He dropped to his knees in front of me, the quick movement making my breath hitch. He reached for the hem of my shirt, lifting it just enough to expose my bare abdomen.

His pressed a soft emotion filled kiss against my skin, sending his love to a child he would never know. He leaned his forehead against me.

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t there to protect you my little one.”

His shoulders slumped as he reached around my waist, pulling me as close to him as he could.

“I failed you Sasha. I’ve failed you both so horribly and I don’t know how to fix this.”

I threaded my hands through his wet hair, holding him close. His shoulders began to shake as his sobs echoed around the bathroom. I held him as tightly as I could, knowing all the demons he faced inside himself right now because I had faced them too.

The guilt and shame of not being able to protect his child would forever change him. It would make his life harder every day. There would be a part of him that would never be healed and would cause him heartbreaking pain daily.

I had no one to save me when our child was taken. No one to comfort me, no one to tell me everything would be okay.

I would do that for him today. I would be the strength that I had needed then and he needed now. Together we would heal each other by sharing our pain.

I blinked the last bit of sleep from my eyes and allowed the memories from yesterday to float back in.

She’d held me last night as I cried.

I clung to her like she was my last chance, my only hope of living through this nightmare.

I cried for the baby we lost, for all the pain Sasha endured alone and from the painful crush of reality that hit when I realized I was to blame for all of it.

The water ran cold and my tears ran dry before she helped me to my feet. We stumbled into the bedroom, quickly changed into dry clothes and climbed into the bed.

I knew in her heart, she wasn’t really mine yet. But my heart told an entirely different story. One that started and ended with her. So I’d gathered her into my arms and pulled her tight against my chest. Right where she belonged and we fell asleep as one.

I panicked when I woke and realized she wasn’t in bed with me, only relaxing when I heard her in the main room. At least I knew she was still here.

I felt weak and shaky. The last 24 hours had taken a toll on my physical health but also something else.  Emotionally I was fucking mess. Finding out about my child had brought me to my knees. It was more than I could take and I needed Sasha to help me figure out how to navigate it all.

I’ve always known life was nothing more than a spec of time given by an unforgiving and ruthless universe. I also knew all too well that karma could steal it back at any time. But this was the first time I understood the depth of destruction that happened to your soul when someone you cared about was harmed.

This was different from when Gen died. At that time, the need for revenge fueled me. But knowing what had happened to Sasha and our child was a completely different sensation. It felt as if someone had taken every fiber of strength I had as a man, stripped it of the protective coating and exposed it to the torture of my weaknesses. It was a stinging of electricity that kept me awake in the painful aftershock.

I walked into the kitchen deciding to regain some of my badass. Yes, I cried in front of her, but I would prove to her my momentary show of emotions did not define me as a man.

Her beauty was breath taking and stopped me in my tracks as soon as she came into sight. The reality was- no matter how badass I thought I was, this woman was my weakness and my strength all at once.

She wore the Black Vipers t-shirt she’d slipped into last night and those dark-colored leggings women loved to wear to show off the curve of their ass. And she looked good in them.

She was deep in thought. Her long hair hung around her face while she rummaged through the bag she’d brought, mumbling something to herself.

She paused hearing me come into the room but didn’t lift her eyes from the bag.

“Hey,” I said softly, rubbing the back of my neck.

She let out a harsh breath, lifting her eyes and settling them on mine.

An uneasy feeling began to crawl up my spine. Her softness from last night was gone.

“I need my car key,” she said.

I searched her face, trying to figure out why she would want to leave. “Where are you going?”

She continued to rearrange her bag, ignoring me and shoving a few bottles of water into the side pocket.

She was trying so hard to be emotionless but the small tremor in her hand gave away her indecisiveness.

“I’m leaving.”

I walked toward her, stopping on the opposite side of the table. I braced myself on the edge and leaned toward her. “I can see that, but where in the fuck do you think you’re going?”

She crossed her arms over her chest, shifting her weight to one foot. ‘It’s none of your business.”

I stood frozen, trying to figure out for the life of me what she had planned. I squeezed the edge of the table, not wanting to know the answer to the question begging to be asked.

“Are you the one who called Maverick? Is that how they found me?”

“God, no. Why the hell would I do that?”

“I don’t know. Maybe you’re working for them.”

“That makes no sense at all.”

“Maverick has a price on my head. Maybe you need the money.”

She shook her head. “I don’t.”

“Maybe its revenge and you want to see me dead for what I’ve done to you.”

“Nope.”

Not an ounce of anxiety flashed on her face. She was telling the truth.

“Then why are you set on leaving when we just found each other?”

She steadied her eyes on mine and the entire world stopped. There was nothing but her.

“Don’t you get it? I wasn't looking for you. I wasn't thinking about you or dreaming about you. We weren’t looking for each other, you just happened to end up in my hospital. Now everything has gone to shit and I’m back on the run. I need to go.”

“Are you crazy? Maverick is out there and I’m sure he is looking for both of us. I can’t protect you if you’re not with me.”

“You can’t protect me at all. Not before and certainly not now.”

I felt the sting of her words in every part of my being. “I guess I deserve that.”

“Yes you do, now give me my key.” She held out her hand.

Suddenly, it all clicked into place.

“You were leaving anyway, weren’t you? That’s why you said the car wasn’t for hiding, it was for running. You were going to leave and not tell me.”

“Yes.” Her face was hard, her hands in fists at her sides.

“Why?”

“Because I don’t want this. The two of us being together is dangerous. I’ve already put everyone I care about at risk by not being strong enough to walk away when I realized who you were.”

“Who the fuck are you hiding from?”

Her eyes slid over my shoulder to one of the TVs mounted to the wall. She gasped and then covered her mouth with her hand. I watched as the color drained from her face and tears filled her eyes. She fell forward, catching her weight on the table as her legs gave out.

“No. No, no, no!”

I rushed around the table, trying to get to her before she ended on the floor.

“Holy shit. What’s wrong with you?”

Her eyes were wild with fear as she stared at the screen. I steadied her against my body, trying to shelter her from whatever she was seeing but she pushed me out of the way. Walking on shaky legs, she moved closer to the television.

I grabbed the remote, turning the sound up and stepping behind her. Senator Richardson stood solemn and steady behind his usual podium, flanked by security guards and pretty blond intern whose eyes were strangely fixed on the ground. He spoke in a controlled manner but his voice was laced with vengeance.

“The monsters responsible for these heinous crimes will be found. They will be prosecuted to the furthest extent of the law. In the thirty years I’ve been in service to this state, I’ve never seen anything like this. I don’t care who these guys are, they will pay for this. Our thoughts and prayers are with the families of the victims.”

The station flashed back to a somber TV anchor.

“That was Senator Richardson talking earlier about the discovery of two female bodies believed to have been murdered over a possible turf war between rival MC gangs. Once again, I caution you. Even though the footage was shot with a cell phone and we have blurred the faces of the victims, there is no doubt these two suffered greatly. Watch with caution.”

The screen switched to a gravel road. Flashing lights from emergency vehicles cut through the early morning darkness. The road was familiar. My heart ramped to super speed.  I stepped closer to the TV, hoping I was wrong.

The amateur cameraman walked toward the two dark images making sure to stay hidden in the trees lining the road.

On each side of the road stood a wooden cross pounded into the dirt. A metal chain attached to the top hung down ending in metal cuffs that held each body suspended about a foot off the ground.

Though the station had blurred the images, it was clear to see both bodies were marred with slash marks, making their clothes hang off them. The faces were unrecognizable, beaten with something solid.

The TV reporter came back on the screen. “The victims have since been identified as Tanda Wilson, a local woman who has been arrested in the past for drug possession and prostitution. The other is Nancy Schnider, a nurse from a local hospital. Authorities have yet to speak on a possible motive or if there is thought to be a connection between these two women. They have also said it is too early in the investigation to theorize why they were found hanging on a road leading to the compound of the outlaw biker gang, The Black Vipers.”

Sasha started pacing, pulling at her hair. “Oh my God. I killed her. I killed her because I couldn’t stay away from you.” She turned and pointed at me.

I reached for her but she pulled away. “You didn't do this,” I said. “She chose to stay. I tried to get her to come with us.”

She continued to pace, her eyes on the ground. “Why? Why would they kill her? What would the purpose of it be?”

“I don’t know.”

She looked at me, her eyes were frantic. “I have to go.”

“No. Absolutely not. Look what they did to Nancy. If they figure out you and I have a connection, you will be dead for sure.”

She turned on her heels and came at me, pushing as hard as she could against my chest.

”We cannot be together. People die when we are together. People we love will continue to die if we don’t walk away from each other now! Those two women won’t be the end of it.”

I grabbed her arms, pinning them to her sides and crushed my lips against hers. She fought me for only a second before leaning even harder into me. Ripping her hands free from mine, she grabbed my hair and entwined her fingers pulling me closer.

I lifted her onto the table and pushed myself between her legs. She moaned as I rubbed myself against her. I had never wanted to bury myself inside of a woman as badly as I did her.

She slowed the pace of our kisses from a frantic taking to a soft and slow sharing of each other. Her soft lips rolled over mine, soothing and healing parts of me only she could.

She pulled away, breathless and flushed. Placing her hands on the sides of my face, she leaned into me whispering, “Tight, please listen to me. We’ll never be safe together. If you want me to be safe, you have to let me go.”

My heart stopped beating, my lungs stopped breathing and for a second I wondered if I had it in me to grant her request. Could she be speaking the hard truth? Maybe she would be safer away from me. A hurricane of emotions erupted. How could what she was saying make no sense and perfect sense all at the same time?

I stepped away from her as my head spun. She slipped off the table and I vaguely heard her footsteps heading toward the bedroom.

I rubbed my hands down my face, wondering what the Hell I was going to do. Clarity finally found its way into my head. I rolled my neck from side to side. Fuck that. She wasn’t going anywhere without me.