Authors: Scarlet Risqué
“Huh.” Mimi stopped biting her fingernails. “I’m not sure. I just couldn’t do it in that moment. I’m sorry Scarlet.” She grabbed my hand and held it tightly. “I guess I had some feelings for him. You know I don’t like killing. It’s all in the past. I don’t want to think about it.”
“I understand.”
I crushed the remnants of my sandwich in the wrapper and sipped my coffee. If Mimi could overcome her emotions and attachment to Vargen, why couldn’t I do the same?
Am I in love with Conan
?
Is that why I can’t bear the thought of losing him
?
Am I a fool fighting for a love I can never have
?
Blood Rubies
“It’s been a tough week.” Conan sighed. “There’s too much to do and too little time.”
“You can say that again. I’m glad it’s Friday,” I replied.
“I wish I could build a time machine. I’d be able to get all my work done and spend more time with you.”
“I’m here all day long five days a week,” I said, pointing at my desk. “What more could you ask for?”
“A lot.” Conan caressed my cheek and kissed my forehead. “You heal me Scarlet … right here.” He placed my hand on his muscular chest.
“Okay Mr. Mush.” My cheeks were burning with embarrassment. “Are we going to dinner?”
“Yes, but I have to come back afterward.”
“Why?”
“I’ll tell you about it at dinner.”
* * *
The limo pulled up to the Ritz-Carlton on Central Park South. Conan’s bodyguards escorted us into the aquamarine building and we took the elevator up to the Black restaurant.
Conan gave the maître d’ his name. We were taken to a private dining room and the bodyguards stood outside the doorway. The waiter took our order and left, shutting the door behind him.
“Why do you have to work tonight?” I asked sweetly.
“A very nasty situation has arisen. White Holdings is buying up too much Wilmar stock for comfort. I’ve called an emergency meeting of the board at nine tonight.”
“White Holdings?” There it was. The White Queen was making her next move.
“Are you telling me you’ve never heard of them?” Conan asked, raising his eyebrows.
“Um.”
Is he on to me
?
Did he bring me to this private dining room to dispatch me
?
It’s easy to get a corpse out of a hotel without raising suspicion
. “Of course I’ve heard of them. I came across the name when I was applying for jobs, but I wasn’t interested in working for them. I guess I just put the name out of my mind.”
“They’re a huge conglomerate headquartered here. They’re known for great pay and benefits across all their companies. Why wouldn’t you want to work for them?” Conan asked, staring at me.
“I’m not sure.” I clasped my hands and placed my elbows on the table. “Okay, I confess, I saw an article about you and your picture made me want to apply to be your secretary.”
“Is that right?” Conan smiled and looked down at the table. “Well I guess lady luck was with me that day.”
“It seems like lady luck is often with you these days, Mr. Casey.” I smiled and played with a lock of my hair, hoping to distract him.
“Sometimes. Anyway, we never thought of White Holdings as a direct threat until this week. I’m concerned that they’re going to try a hostile takeover.”
The waiter came into the room. He quickly served our entrées before rushing away and closing the door.
“That doesn’t sound good,” I said, poking my white fish fillet with my knife. My stomach began to churn.
“It’s not good at all.” Conan took a bite of his bloody steak. “Mrs. White, the owner of White Holdings, is more concerned with power than profit. That’s what makes her so dangerous, not to mention that she can be utterly ruthless. I’ve heard rumors. Anyway, if they get a majority stake in Wilmar it’s going to be very, very bad news for our investors, and our plans. White has a track record of screwing investors and upper management. It’s great for the employees because they don’t cut jobs, but upper management salaries, bonuses, and profits take a nosedive … and White Holdings usually ends up with some sort of monopoly.”
I couldn’t believe Conan was telling me all this for no reason. I was convinced that he was trying to get me to confess and turn on the White Queen … or worse. It was bad enough that I’d fallen for him. I could probably still get away with my life, but if I turned double agent—and the White Queen found out—she’d have me killed.
“Scarlet, I think we need to talk.”
“About what?” I asked with my best poker face.
Is this it
? I put down my fork and felt for the switchblade in my heel.
If he’s on to me I’ll have to cut his vocal cords and make the bodyguards believe I’m just going to the ladies, then I can make a run for it
.
“I know finding the ring last weekend was a shock. I’m sorry.”
“Thanks.”
Phew, I’m safe
…
for now.
“I’m sorry too … for reacting like a lunatic.”
“Don’t be. I understand,” said Conan. “I’m working on putting that whole ugly episode with my ex behind me, but it will take a bit of time. Can you be patient with me?”
“How patient?”
“I’m not sure, but I don’t want anything to change between us. I’d still like you to spend weekends with me. I’m just not ready to make any promises about the future.”
“Conan, I’m not really sure what you’re saying.” I wanted to ask him if we had a chance at a real future or not, but I couldn’t talk about that until I was free of the White Queen. I still had to find my mother, and that meant completing the mission.
“All I know right now is that I want to do something nice for you, something to show you how special you are to me.”
“Like what?” I asked in a sultry voice.
“Well, I know you don’t like diamonds. So which gems do you like? Rubies? Emeralds? Sapphires?”
“Thinking of showering your love with some expensive jewelry?”
“I love showering a ravishing beauty with the beautiful things she deserves.”
“Oh you’re good Mr. Casey.” I smiled. “I like red rubies. They remind me of my name.”
“Red rubies for my Scarlet Queen. I should’ve guessed,” he said, staring at me like a hungry wolf. “Will you meet me at my apartment later? It’s my turn to be in control and I’ve been thinking about what I’ll do to you.”
“Mr. Casey, control yourself,” I teased. “Don’t ever forget that you serve the Scarlet Queen.”
“I won’t. I’m sorry.” Conan blushed and stroked his water glass with his long fingers. “I can’t help myself. You stoke my desires … turn me into a wild beast.”
“As I should.” I felt blood rush down my spine and I ran my foot up his leg. “But I can’t meet you later.”
“Why not? Is something wrong? Are you still upset about the ring?”
“No, nothing’s wrong,” I lied. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with my knight before the White Queen put Wilmar in checkmate, but I wasn’t convinced that he didn’t know I was an agent. “I have to feed my cat, and I want to get an early night.”
“I’m disappointed, but I won’t hold it against you.”
“Next time,” I said, tilting my head and twirling a lock of hair behind my ear.
“I’ll hold you to that.” Conan smiled and ate the last bite of his steak. “So, when did you get your cat? What’s its name?”
“Her name is Milky. She was a stray who appeared at my kitchen window the day I moved into my apartment. I gave her food and she kept coming back. I eventually decided to keep her.”
“I’m not surprised that your powers of enchantment extend to animals.”
“My powers?” I laughed. “You flatter me.”
“Never,” he said, squeezing my hand in earnest. “Scarlet, I don’t think you truly realize the affect you have on me.”
“I’d love to hear more, but a cat’s got to eat and a man’s got to get back to work.” My stomach was still churning and I’d had enough of this game. I was anxious to get home … safely.
“You’re right.” Conan looked at his watch. “I must go protect the profits … so that I can buy pretty things for my Scarlet Queen.”
“You make that sound like a bad thing. Life without a good woman is pretty meaningless for most men.”
“I can’t deny that.” Conan smiled and kissed my hand.
“It’s eight forty-five. You don’t have time to take me home. I’ll just get a cab.”
“My driver can drop you off after he takes me to the office.”
“That’s all right.” The last thing I wanted was to be alone with one of Conan’s guys. Just because he didn’t knock me off it didn’t mean that one of his guys wouldn’t. “Poor little Milky must be starving, and I don’t want to risk pissing her off. She has her own ways of getting revenge.” “As you wish,” said Conan as we walked to the elevator.
* * *
I turned on the radio and closed the curtains as soon as I got home. Then I called Mimi.
“Hey Scar, what’s up?” Mimi asked.
“I think Wilmar could be on to us. We have to be extra careful.”
“What happened?”
“I just had dinner with Conan and he told me he’s having an emergency meeting with the board tonight to discuss White Holdings. It looks like the White Queen could be going for a hostile takeover and Conan’s calling battle stations.”
“Oh crap.”
“No kidding! I thought he knew I was an undercover agent for White Holdings. I think we need to stay in closer contact from now on.”
“Stay safe,” said Mimi. “I’ll let Vanus know and she’ll get the word out.”
“Thanks Mimi. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
“Night Janet,” said Mimi and she hung up.
Milky sat at my feet and started meowing. “Don’t worry Milks, I won’t betray you too.” We went to the kitchen and I gave Milky her favorite canned tuna.
Serving two masters was really starting to take its toll on me. I had to finish my mission, but I wanted a future with Conan—an impossible future. I needed to reconnect with real myself before I was subsumed by one of my fake identities.
I walked over to the large mirror in my living room and took off my clothes.
I spend more time in front of this mirror than watching television
…
oh well, I suppose it’s better to watch myself than an electronic box full of lies
.
I studied the shadows in the mirror before turning around and caressing the tattoo in the middle of my lower back. The two isosceles triangles were joined at their apices—one on top of the other—to make a simple red hourglass.
The tattoo was my graduation gift to myself. It was a testament to my new identity and my new life. I’d never forget the pain of the thin needle piercing my flesh. What I wasn’t expecting was the euphoria once my body began releasing endorphins. The mixture of pain and pleasure was ecstasy. Getting my tattoo introduced me to secret, dark pleasures. I would always be a marked prisoner, but I was a liberated soul.
I thought about the White Queen’s world. She inflicted pain on her enemies to protect the weak. Were her pure intentions made impure by her cruelty?
Sometimes you have to do evil to be good
…
I guess
.
I inspected myself in the mirror. My hair almost reached down to my slim waist, and all my muscles were toned. I rubbed the dark crescent scar on my left side. It was the only blemish on my perfect body—a permanent reminder of Mimi’s betrayal. I hissed angrily at the mirror.
I grabbed my notebook and lay on my bed.
“This is the stronger me,
Alone in this world.
This is how I feel.
This is who I am.”
I dozed off and woke up in a cold sweat. My life had been flickering before my eyes in slow motion.
I’d dreamt that I was back at the farm. I was sitting on the white glider bench, gently rocking back and forth. The sun was blazing and I was staring off into the sunflower fields. “Get up!” my stepfather screamed, slapping me across the face with his huge hand. “Get inside and do the chores!” he commanded in his booming voice.
The scene suddenly changed. Conan and I were standing on the roof of the tallest building in the universe. We were lost in space, looking down at the lights twinkling below us. We made love, sweetly kissing and caressing each other. “Do we have a soul link?” I asked. “Does our love transcend the physical? Does it exist beyond this dimension?”
I was transported to the White Queen’s office and she was a dressed like a huge snowy owl with flowing white feathers that covered the room. “It’s wrong to fall in love!” she squawked, pointing her long finger-like talon in my face. “Love is for the weak! You’re my Red Hourglass and you’re strong … too strong for love!” She ran her pointed nails along my cheek. “I made you into a deadly black widow, and all you have to do is finish your mission. You know you’re my best assassin,” she assured me softly. “Listen to me my darling, and you’ll never be hurt again … never feel pain again.” Her haunting voice trailed off into the distance as I jerked awake.
My notebook was next to me and two lines popped into my head.
“When life and death are a blade apart,
It’s hard to tell what’s real and what’s not.”
I got up and switched off the lights before stumbling back to bed.
The Plan
I had a voicemail from Vanus when I woke up. She said to report to the mansion immediately. I sent her a text as I was leaving my apartment.
I boarded the train at Grand Central Station and settled in for the journey. The carriage was empty and I didn’t want to be alone with my thoughts. I slipped my earbuds into my ears.
“Won’t you hold me now … nothing matters but the two of us …”
a song blasted. The lyrics clicked with me and my mind began to race.
What if I don’t really want to complete the mission
?
Could our love fight the forces of the White Queen and free me
?
Are we destined to be together in this lifetime
?
“If our love is a tragedy, why are you my clarity?”
the song continued.
If our love is a tragedy, why does Conan seem to be the solution to all my problems
?
Maybe our love isn’t a tragedy at all. Maybe it’s pointing me to something more
.
“You’re a piece of me I wish I didn’t need … still I chase you relentlessly … I don’t know why …”