Authors: R. E. Butler
Before he could say anything, she whispered, “Don’t tell me I don’t have to do this, James. I
want
to. I’ve never wanted anything more than I do right this moment. Give yourself to me the way I gave myself to you. Please.”
He caressed her lower lip with his thumb. “I would never deny you, love.”
She squeezed his shaft, and he pressed his hand harder against the wall, locking his knees to keep from falling. She licked the head tentatively, hummed in pleased surprise, and licked him again. Exploring the throbbing head of his cock with her tongue, she tasted all of him, swirling and flicking her tongue. When she opened her lips wide and took him into her mouth, he thought he might combust. Just burst into ashes right there in the bedroom. It was so good. She made little humming noises in her throat that drove him wild, and he struggled not to move his hips and force himself into her mouth.
She let go of his cock with her hands and gripped his hips, her fingers digging into his flesh as she bobbed her head on him. She looked so beautiful, taking care of him because she wanted to, her lips swollen from their kisses. He’d been close to coming when she’d climaxed, and now he was right back on the edge, torn between letting go and holding back.
She moved faster on him, her tongue teasing the underside of his cock as she took him into her mouth faster and faster. He remembered how sweet she’d smelled when she came, and the rush of heat around his fingers as her climax had taken over. He slipped his hand into her hair, feeling the silky strands as they wrapped around his fingers, and she cast her gaze up to his and he lost control. His muscles tightened, his balls drew up, and his cock throbbed as she took him deep into her mouth once more and he came. He groaned loudly, fisting her hair and pressing his other hand hard into the wall. She grasped his cock with her hands and drank him down with a throaty moan, letting him slip from her mouth with a satisfied groan.
He stared down at her. He didn’t move because he wasn’t sure he wouldn’t toss her to the bed, strip her clothes, and make love to her. The blue in her eyes slowly faded to green, the look of hot pleasure replaced by something that resembled guilt, but she smiled and the regret he’d seen disappeared, making him wonder if he’d seen it at all. She stood slowly, her body bumping his as her fingers trailed up his back, and she hugged herself to him. Kissing his throat, she said, “I want to say thank you, but that feels tacky.”
He chuckled and kissed her forehead. “You’re amazing.”
She lifted her head and smiled at him. “You’re not so bad yourself. I’m going to take a shower. Do you think there’s any breakfast downstairs?”
“If not, I’ll make us something. What sounds good?” He released her reluctantly. She walked over to her bag that he’d had brought from the hotel and unzipped it.
“Thinking about John and the kids hunting makes me want to have some red meat. Maybe steak and eggs?”
“You bet.”
She smiled at him and turned her attention to her bag, where she pulled out the short stack of clothes and a bag of toiletries. He pulled on his jeans from the night before, deciding to take a shower after they ate. As he watched her walk into the bathroom humming a tune, he wondered if what they had shared was a sign of her rethinking taking off with Dom.
He certainly hoped it was.
Rue shut the door to the bathroom and turned on the shower, and then she pressed her ear to the door and listened. After a minute, the bedroom door opened and shut, and she knew that James was heading down to the kitchen.
She opened the bathroom door and walked quickly to the nightstand where she’d seen James’ phone next to his car keys. It was still there and she breathed a sigh of relief, doubly thankful when she pressed the button and the phone activated immediately because he hadn’t set a passcode. Opening the contacts, she found Jackson Whitman’s name and opened a text message.
Would you bring Rue’s car back to the house tonight
? she typed and then pressed send.
She stared at the screen, keeping one ear tuned to the door in case James returned suddenly. It felt like an eternity before Jax responded.
“No problem.”
Thanks
, she typed back and then waited a few minutes to make sure that Jax didn’t text again. Then she deleted the message. After putting the phone on the nightstand exactly how James had left it, she darted back into the bathroom and shut the door. Relief and guilt twined together inside her like choking vines and her cat was right there, snarling in protest. She hated being deceitful, especially to the two males who had stood beside her when it could have cost them their lives, but she had to leave. They might believe that the threat against her was gone; they might believe that they could keep her and Dom safe, but the only thing she really knew for sure was that the only way to be truly safe was to leave. She wanted to have faith in what they believed, that her life could be different now, but the moment she let her guard down, something terrible would happen. She’d seen the vicious cycle. Every time she trusted someone, horrible things happened. She’d tested fate too many times and she couldn’t handle putting herself and Dom at risk again.
She stared at herself in the bathroom mirror. Her plan was to grab Dom tonight after everyone went to bed and sneak out, take the rental car, and run to Michigan and then go north. She needed to just walk away without any further physical interaction with them. If she let them touch her tonight, then she’d never be able to leave. It would be far less cruel if she’d just leave, even though she wasn’t sure she had the strength.
* * * * *
John led the boys back toward the house after their run. Henry was still getting used to being in his shift since he hadn’t been sixteen very long, but he was a quick learner. Dom, on the other hand, had been shifting for almost a year, but he’d never been allowed to hunt outside because it was too dangerous. John couldn’t imagine what it was like to be cooped up in a house when the natural instincts of the cat were difficult to ignore.
When John first shifted, their father had taken him out by himself and ran with him for hours. He’d shared all his knowledge and encouraged John to make the most out of his shifted form, including using his instincts when he was in his human form as well, which had helped him during the years in his job on the force. His sense of smell and his increased hearing abilities had benefited him in and out of the woods many times.
They’d been hunting for hours. The boys worked very well together, even though they hardly knew each other. He wondered about their connection. Paranormal creatures sometimes had unexplainable connections to each other, and he figured this was probably one of those instances. It strengthened his belief that Rue was meant to be his and John’s mate, since Henry and Dom were already treating each other like brothers.
John padded over to his jeans, shifted back to his human form, and dressed.
The screen door opened and Jilly walked out. “How were the woods?”
“Good,” he answered, giving her hug and kissing the top of her head. It felt so good to have his family all together in the same house.
Jilly chuckled and John looked over to see the two boys still in their shifts, stalking each other.
“Dom’s bigger than the other panthers, even Hanai who is the biggest one in their clan. Do you suppose it’s because he’s an albino? Is Rue bigger?”
“She’s larger than any females I’ve ever known, but I don’t really know how she compares to other panther females. Maybe it’s part of the genetic makeup to be larger.”
“It’s probably helpful to be bigger when you’re different in their culture, so they can fend off the people who would want to kill them for it.”
John grunted in agreement. Dom climbed up onto the picnic table and leaned over the edge, peering at Henry who was batting at a butterfly nearby. With no warning outside of a playful purr, Dom leapt at Henry and tackled him, and the two rolled together across the yard.
“How is Rue doing?”
“There are moments when I think she’s let down her defenses, but then she’ll slam them back up again.”
Jilly was quiet for a few moments while they watched the boys stalk and tackle each other. They reminded John of him and his brothers growing up. He’d never thought about how lonely Henry must have felt not having any brothers. He should have, he realized, after Alek had confessed to feeling like the odd-man-out himself. Alek had found Lachlyn, and he shared her with Jericho, but there was a long period of time when Alek thought he was going to be alone forever.
“I’d like to take her over to Callie’s.”
“Oh?”
“Callie fought her attraction to Ethan and Eryx in the beginning, too. I know the circumstances are different, but she still had two males who wanted to keep her when she had other plans, and that’s a lot like Rue. I kind of felt like that, too. When Wyked and Fate first marked me and I had all these new emotions and the release of my memories, I tried to go back to my old life and ignore what I’d felt with them. It was too hard for me, you know. I only lasted a week before I had to go back to them, but if Rue is determined to go back to her way of life, you have to show her that things can be different.”
“They
are
different and she knows it,” John groused. “She knows the banishment was lifted, Gerarli is dead, and her parents are like living ghosts, trapped in the clan for the rest of their lives. No one wants to hurt her or Dom anymore.”
“Dad,” Jilly sighed exasperatedly, “she hasn’t known anything for the last twenty or so years except hiding and keeping people at arms’ length. You can
tell
her she’s safe until you’re blue in the face, but until she
feels
it, she won’t believe it. Taking Dom out in his shifted form was probably a good start. She will see that he wasn’t chased through the woods by angry villagers with torches, but I think the best thing you can do is get her out of the house and let her experience life without the wigs and heavy perfumes she was using to hide her identity.”
“You’re talking about a date?”
She shrugged. “Why not? Dom told me and Fate this morning that his mom has never gone out on a date. That’s sad, don’t you think? So get dressed up, take her out, and show her off. When she sees that no one cares about her hair color, I bet she’ll start relaxing her guard a little.”
John watched as Henry sailed through the air and missed Dom completely. Dom made a sound that seemed a lot like a laugh, and the two chased each other again. He’d never had to be alone. He’d always had his brothers close by. When Jilly wouldn’t sleep through the night as an infant, Grant had come over and walked the floor with her for hours trying to soothe her while John got some much needed sleep. When he’d had to work the occasional night shift, James had taken both kids into his house and even given them a bedroom of their own so they felt comfortable there.
Rue had never had any of that. From age sixteen on, she’d been utterly alone. Scared to death to trust anyone, probably looking over her shoulder constantly. He had expected her to trust them when they said she was safe, but he realized now that he had no right to ask that of her. He couldn’t make her trust them; she had to come to that conclusion on her own. Spending time with the females was a good start, and so was taking her out on a date.
“I think taking her to Callie’s house is a great idea.”
“And the date?”
“I have to work tonight, but I’ll talk to James about getting reservations somewhere nice.”
Jilly went on her toes and kissed him on the cheek, waved at the two cats who looked like they were trying to high-five each other, and then headed into the house. Henry and Dom shifted at almost the exact same time, and John grabbed their shorts off the picnic table and handed them to each one.
“Melody is going down to her old home to visit her friend Scarlett with Micah and Tristan. She said we could come along if we want,” Henry said.
“When?”
“They’re leaving tomorrow morning and they’ll be back late tomorrow night. It’s just for the day. Micah said one of the brothers of Melody’s friend, Scarlett, is graduating from college and the pack is having a party for him,” Henry said.
John laughed. “You do need to go back to school, Henry.”
“Dad,” Henry whined. “It’s just another day. I’ve been keeping up with the homework that’s posted on the teachers’ pages on the school website. Please?”
“Yeah, Dad, come on…please? Melody said there would be lots of she-wolves there,” Dom said, wiggling his brows.
John laughed. “All right. It’s okay with me, but you need to check with your mom.”
Dom grimaced and then he looked at John with a calculating gleam. “You know she’s not going to want to stick around here. She’s been running too long.”
“I know.”
“You’re going to fix that, right? Help her to want to stay?”
“I’m going to do my best.”
“I don’t know what it’s like to feel connected to a female like a mate, but mom is fighting being around you guys because she doesn’t trust anyone but herself. The couple of times she has trusted people, they betrayed her.”
“You’re talking about your father?”
Dom’s face hardened. “He is
not
worthy of the title.” Dom shook his head as if he was banishing dark thoughts, and said, “Not just him, but back in the beginning with her clan. Her parents were the ones who branded her and rubbed some kind of metallic dust into the wound that made it heal slowly and painfully. They kept her chained up, naked, in front of the whole clan until the sun rose and then they gave her a bag and kicked her out, threatening to kill her if she ever came around them again or had cubs. It wasn’t just the guy she slept with who tried to kill her when he saw her white hair, but it was also her family turning their backs and wishing she had never been born. Family isn’t supposed to hurt you like that.”
He walked the boys into the house and left them rummaging in the kitchen and went to find Rue. He found her and James in the family room watching TV.
James said, “Rue is going to lunch with Jilly at Callie’s.”
“Good. How would you like to go out to dinner with us tomorrow night?” He looked at Rue as he sat down on the plush couch.
She turned her head slowly, her eyes regarding him carefully as if she still weren’t sure she could trust him. “Like a date?”
He smiled. “Exactly like a date.”
“Tomorrow?” she asked.
“I have to work until nine tonight.”
She seemed to be thinking very hard, pressing her lips into a thin line and furrowing her brows. Then she smiled, but it was one of her fake smiles that she seemed to plaster to her face whenever they were talking to her about anything relating to the future. “Sounds good, but I don’t really have anything to wear for a date.”
“I’m sure that Sam or Lisa would let you borrow something,” James said.
She nodded with the same fake smile on her face and stood. “I’m going to see Dom before I have to go with the girls over to Callie’s.”
She strode from the room and John looked at James when they were alone. “Dom said she’s never trusted anyone without being betrayed.”
“It seems like she’s always got one eye on the nearest exit.”
“I don’t blame her, but I sure wish she’d give us a chance. I wish there was something that we could do that would show her that we’re not going to hurt her or abandon her.”
James sighed and let his head drop to the back of the couch. “I don’t know what that might be, but I feel like our time with her is running out quickly if we don’t find a way to gain her trust.” There was a long pause while John thought about what they could do for her, when James said, “I touched her, while you were gone.”
John lifted his head and stared at his brother. “What?”
“It wasn’t planned. It just kind of happened. I didn’t want to keep it from you.”
A shaft of jealousy pierced John’s heart so fast that he almost gasped out loud. Grinding his teeth, he forced the jealousy away. The last thing that Rue needed was the two of them fighting over her like teenagers. After a long moment, he willed himself to relax and ignored the urge to punch James in the mouth.
“Something was off about it, though,” James said, thoughtfully.
“What do you mean?”