Redemption is Here (An FBI/Romance Thriller Book 9) (17 page)

Jax Armstrong relaxed. Being around this man was easy and something she could get used to.

Then, she realized they worked on opposite sides of the country. She needed to reel it in, and fast.

“So, you mentioned y
ou worked for a few governments. Care to share?” he asked, curious about the woman beside him.

Her hand paused halfway to her mouth.

Tony saw it.

It was right there on the surface.

Fear.

She lowered her hand
before taking a deep breath. He’d shared his past, and she had to do the same, despite what talking about it would do to her later.

“I mostly worked for
our government, but occasionally I was lent out on assignments to other parts of the world.”

He waited.

“The US would help smaller countries search for the victims of genocide and other atrocities.”

Tony knew what that meant. It was a part of their job that no anthropologist enjoyed. No one liked playing in mass graves to find countless victim of murder. The few times
that he’d done it for the FBI had been pretty damn horrible.

“Where have you been?”

She laughed sardonically. “Does it matter? If you’ve dug up one dead child, you’ve seen it all.”

He placed his fingers on her knee. “It does matter. Each and every victim matters, Jax.”

Taking a deep breath, she continued. “Chechnya, Somalia, Maguindanao, and Vukovar, to name a few.”

She didn't have to say anything else. He understood. Jax Armstrong was used to digging in the worst situations. All those places were where the governments of
questionable countries had buried their murdered. There were women, men, and children, and they were discarded like none of them had mattered. She’d spent years giving faces to victims of genocide.

It had to be hard.

“Can we talk about something less gruesome? I’m enjoying dinner, and I don’t often get to eat food that’s prepared for me,” she stated calmly.

Tony saw the pain and wanted to help alleviate it. “Absolutely. How about we talk about your family?”

That seemed to calm her down.

Sort of…

“I have a brother. He’s pretty awesome. He’s in the military, so I don’t get to see him often.”

“Which branch?” he asked, trying to
help her forget about the previous discussion. Tony could see the artery in her throat still throbbing in distress.

“
Jagger is a Marine. He’s off saving the world. We laugh, because it’s his job to keep people out of graves, and my job to dig them up after their dead. My parents would find that funny.”

Tony wanted to ask
, and she must have sensed it.

“My parents
are both deceased,” she offered, but didn't give him any more. She’d already talked about the graves. This conversation was ruining her mood.

Jax knew she’d pay tonight.

“How long have you been with the FBI?” she asked, changing the subject.

“Right out of school, so about twelve years.”

She looked up at him. “How old were you when you earned your degree?”

“Twenty six,” he replied. “I blew through my masters and was on a mission to earn those letters behind my name,” he offered, smiling. “If your next question is my age, I’m
forty one.”

She thought he was much younger. The man before her didn't look
any older than his thirties. While she was good at skulls and bones, if there was flesh, she was out of her element.

“How old are you, Jaxon?” he asked, finishing his chicken.

“I’m almost thirty two,” she replied. Yeah, he had a hell of a lot more experience in the field than she did. Almost double the time. No wonder his articles were so well versed. In over a decade, he’d lived a lot more.

Tony couldn’t help but be drawn to her, but now he had a few more concerns. The first being their age difference. He was older, and she was running from fear.

“How was dinner?” he asked, standing from the couch.

“Amazing
, and I’ll never forget it.” Getting up, she took his plate from him. “You cooked, so I’ll clean up. Why don’t you get ready for bed?” she offered.

He wanted to stay by her side, but Tony was smart enough to know she needed space. His worry was he’d screw this up and make her bolt. Now, he couldn’t back away. He was too damn curious for his own good, and he needed to know more.

“Thank you,” he offered, watching her walk away.

Tony did the smartest thing he could. He escaped to the bathroom to shower. If he stayed, he’d say something wrong and upset her. There was no doubt in his mind he’d screw it up. For now, a hasty retreat was best.

Jax didn't look up until she was in the kitchen. When he walked away, she wanted to cry. The old demons were dug up and her heart hurt.

She hated being alone, but what choice did she have? Death was her only companion
, since she’d chosen this road in life.

Still, it would have been nice to have him stay.

It would have given her a little light into the darkness of her soul.

Tony finished his shower and was working on his tablet in his room. He’d gotten a beep and
immediately knew who it was. Chris Leonard had found a few minutes to talk to him.

“Hey! How’s the honeymoon?” Tony asked, completely jealous.

“It’s great. Australia is fun. You’ll have to see it sometime,” Chris offered. “How’s work?”

Tony laughed
, and then told him all about it.

Chris’s eyes got huge. “MAN! I’m missing mummies? There’s a million jokes
that I could throw out at Elizabeth with this one,” he stated, laughing like a fool.

“Yeah, she’s all stirred up.”

Chris could hear the tension in his voice. “What’s going on with you?”

Just then, there was a soft knock on his door. Tony signaled his buddy to be quiet and darkened the screen. “Come in,” he offered, his heart skipping in his chest.

There stood Jax in her pajamas. His heart barely could take it. She was in tiny little shorts and a tank top. It showed off her well maintained body.

“I just came to tell you thank you for dinner and
say goodnight,” she offered.

He smiled gently. “If you need anything, come get me.”

With a nod, she closed the door.

Immediately, he plugged in his ear
buds, so only he’d hear Chris’s comment.

“Who the hell was that?” the man asked incredulously.

Tony lowered his voice so it was barely audible. “That was Doctor Jaxon Armstrong,” he said, and then told the man everything, including how screwed he was.

“Oh
shit, Tony,” was his only reply.

“What do I do?” he asked, needing some advice. When it came to his job, he excelled. With women, he was well out of his element.

“Buddy, I wish I could help you, but it was a miracle I caught my wife. You’re going to need reinforcements on this one.”

He closed his eyes. “You mean...?”

Chris laughed. “You better call in the cavalry. She’ll be able to help you.”

God
. He hoped so.

                                 *     *     *

Sleep wasn’t her friend.

Jaxon Armstrong was running from too many demons to get a good night’s rest. Instead, she laid there staring at the ceiling lost in thought. She was thinking about the man in the next room, along with the past she wanted desperately to escape.

While it haunted her sleep, he tormented her waking hours. There was something about Tony Magnus. Maybe it was his cool aqua eyes or calm demeanor.

Either way, she was tormented by being close to him. It was hard not to be attracted to
the man. He was handsome, wise, and gave her a sense of peace. It wasn’t like he was old enough to be her father, but just those few years of age difference was alluring to her.

She found it sexy.

In her life, she’d always been attracted to older men. Maybe it was because she lost her father young, and her older brother had filled his role. Now, she found herself drawn to the anthropologist next door.

When she couldn’t handle the silence anymore, she climbed out of bed. For now, she’d go sit out by the fire
. Maybe it would lull her to sleep.

She could only hope.

Creeping from her room, the door creaked, sounding like an explosion in the darkness. Then, as she crossed the room, her light footsteps echoed like gunshots. Well, so much for sneaking. She swore she could wake the dead.

Jaxon almost laughed at the irony behind that. Taking a seat on the couch, she sat there watching the flames lick at the charred wood.

It reminded her of some of the bodies, and she forced her eyes closed against the visual.

Great.

Now a simple fire was destroying her.

It was just more proof
that she was unsalvageable.

Tony heard the noise.

He wished he was asleep, but his talk with Chris only riled him up even more. It was all because of the woman in the next room.

When he heard footsteps through the living room, he reached for his weapon. It was rare
that he’d wear it, but he always had it with him.

Elizabeth Blackhawk liked her staff armed and ready for anything
. It was times like these that he was grateful. If they had someone sulking around in their cabin, he needed to keep them safe.

Leaving
the safety on, he headed out of his room. As he approached the living room, he could see her. Jaxon was seated on the couch, watching the flames of the fire. Only, she wasn’t at peace. From where he stood, he could see the lights flickering across her features. She looked…

Haunted.

Lowering his gun, he stopped behind her. “Are you okay, Jaxon?” he asked, softly.

It caught her off guard. “Yes,
Tony. I just couldn’t sleep.”

“Yeah, me either,” he admitted, coming around the couch to sit beside her. When he placed the gun on the table, she stared at it.

“I hate those things,” she stated.

“Yeah, I’m not big on them myself, but the
boss lady demands we carry them.”

She
understood. When in the FBI, do as they do.

“You’re not okay, are you?” he asked, taking a stab at it. From the look on her face
, to the lines etched in her brow, he was pretty sure she was all stirred up.

“It’s nothing I’m not used to, Tony. I’m sorry if I woke you,” she apologized.

“Like I said, I was up.”

Glancing over, she noticed he was shirtless and in only a pair of pajama bottoms. His chest was her focus. There was a light splattering of hair
, and she wanted to run her fingers through it. It went straight down his torso to what was hidden below the drawstring pants.

Good grief.

She was screwed.

             
“I’ve found that when I can’t sleep, I sometimes feel better if I get it off my chest,” he offered.

It was funny. She’d feel better getting ON his chest.

“You can trust me,” he said, pushing more.

Jaxon didn't doubt that. She just didn't know where to begin. Finally, she went with it.

“Sometimes, when I talk about the things I’ve seen, I have a hard time sleeping. It scares the hell out of me. I’m good with bones, but when the bodies are still somewhat fleshy, it creeps me out. When I see stripped remains, I can forget they were human. When I see scraps of hair, faces and other things, I can’t make them less than what they are.”

Tony understood.
At the beginning, he was like that too. Now, he didn't let it get to him.

“
I know how hard those jobs are. I’ve done a few myself, Jaxon. I’d like to say it gets easier, but it doesn’t. Each one is horrifying and scars us. You’ll get stronger and move past it.”

Using her fingers, she rubbed viciously at
her eyes. It wasn’t working. The visual wouldn’t go away. It never did.

“Is that why you decided to go into the FBI?”

She glanced over at him, baring her soul. “Yes.” He already knew about the pits of bodies. Why not go for broke?

“How’s that working for you?” he teased, hoping to lighten up the moment.

Jax laughed. “Well, since it’s two in the morning, and I’m not sleeping, I’m guessing not good.”

In that moment, he wanted to take a risk. Reaching over, he took her hand in his. It was chilly, but she didn't pull away. Instead, her fingers linked with his.