Redemption is Here (An FBI/Romance Thriller Book 9) (64 page)

Tony knew it wasn’t the time or place to whip out that word. “Attraction. Something about you makes me want to be with you, Jaxon. I think you’re overthinking all this. We met, there was that chemistry, we’re together. It can just be that simple.”

God,
she wished it was.

“When this is over, I know you’re leaving the FBI, but what about us?” he asked.

Her heart sank. “I wouldn’t worry about it, Tony. You’ll move on.”

Those meager words were all it took. His
control snapped. Slamming down the soup spoon, he spun toward her. “NO! I will not move on!”

She stared at him, mouth agape.
His anger was shocking.

“This,” he motioned to the two of them, “is not going to go away. So, the further you run, the harder it’s going to make it
for both of us. What do I have to do to prove to you that I’m not just pollinating another female flower in the garden of life?”

Moving toward him, she recalled her promise. She’d stay as long as she wasn’t hurting him. Wrapping her arms around his waist, she rested her head on his shoulder. Immediately, he relaxed and dropped his chin to the top of her head.

“I didn't mean to upset you,” she said. “I’m sorry if I hurt you with my words. I really didn't mean it.”

He sighed
, forcing the tension from his body. Tony knew this was going to be a battle, but like Callen said, he needed to dig in and show her he was going to follow through. No matter what, he was going to stick and chase if need be.

“It’s okay.”

Looking up, she went to her toes and laid a gentle kiss across his lips. It was soft, tender, and very loving. Jaxon was crazy about him, but she was worried. When this was over, what would happen? Could a burial rat and a refined doctor make it work? Yes, they both loved anthropology, but they were two sides of a large spectrum.

Tony brought his hand to the back of
her hair. “You’re worth something to me, Jaxy. How can I show you?”

Her eyes filled with tears.

Wasn’t that what she wanted? Her whole life, she only wanted to matter and come first to someone. Here, he was offering her everything she always craved.

It was hard to miss her emotion, and he wanted to keep it light. “Let’s eat, and then maybe we can curl up on the couch and relax for the rest of the night.”

She wouldn’t mind that at all.

Carrying their food to the coffee table, they each sat down. Jaxon tucked her feet up under her as she smiled at the man. He was sweet and gentle. There was that little glimmer of hope that she could do this with him every night, even if she quit her job.

“So, tell me about your family.”

She laughed. “My brother, Jagger, is bad ass. He’s this big scary Marine. I have no freaking clue what he does, but I think he’s good at it. His dress blues have all these pretty medals.
When I ask him what he does, he tells me,
‘if I tell you, I’ll have to kill you’
,” she replied.

He laughed. “Good to know. Is he going to kick my ass for touching his sister?”

“Oh, probably, but it will only hurt for a little while.”

Tony didn't expect that. Where he hoped she’d say no, he still found it funny. “Good to know. I better get ready then.”

Her heart skipped. Here, he was willing to get beat up, just to be with her.

“No siblings?” she asked.

“Nope. My mom was incredibly young when she had me. She was still in high school. Back then, that was a huge no-no. After she gave birth, my father bailed. He told her that he was going into the military, and instead never came back. I don’t know if he’s alive or dead.”

“Do you want to talk about your parents
?”

She laughed. “Oh, where to begin?”

“I would start at the beginning. That’s where all important stories start.”

Jaxon stared at him. “I guess you’re right. Growing up, I never realized
that my dad was a murderous bastard. In fact, he was just dad. I think I was about five when I figured out we weren’t a normal family.”

He sipped his soup.

“We had bodyguards. My guy was named Trey. He was bigger than Director Whitefox. I called him uncle all the time because at four, how was I to know? He was a really nice man. One day, I was at the park with him and another guard. Well, someone tried to kill me. Trey put himself in front of me and died to save me. The other guard got me out of there, but I was changed.”

He couldn’t imagine.

“In that moment, I knew I wasn’t normal. After that, my father put me in lock down. There weren’t any more trips to the park. Instead, he bought a fortress and gave me my own park. There was a pony, carousel, and anything else I wanted. I wasn’t allowed to have friends, people over, or public school. It was literally my mom, Jagger and myself.”

That had to be lonely.

“So, by the time I turned twelve, I had an inkling that something wasn’t kosher. Jagger is four years older than me, so we decided to do something we weren’t supposed to do. We did research on my father.”

“Uh oh.”

She laughed. “Yeah, you could say that again. We were never allowed to watch the news. God forbid if we were to find out our dad was a soulless monster.”

He ran his fingers down her leg.

“Jagger had just left for the Marines and my mom, who was the best,” she began, her eyes filling with tears, “had gone out to get her hair done. While my dad was super protective with Jagger and I, he wasn’t so over the top with her. Looking back at it, I can see that she wanted out, but wouldn’t leave us behind.”

“She died, huh?” he asked.

“Yeah, she was gunned down. My mother never had a chance. Jagger missed her funeral, and I went alone. My asshole father had ‘business’ to take care of. There was more proof that he didn't really love her.”

Tony knew how hard that had to be.

“So, when people find out he’s dead, and they ask if I miss him, the answer is no. He destroyed lives, and I’m glad he’s out of mine. If he was alive, I’d never speak to him again. My father was Irish mob and deserves his death. Are you religious, Tony?”

“No.”

“Well, I was at one time. My father reaped what he sowed. Justice was done the day he died. It set me free and now I can live my life.”

Tony moved closer to her.

“I know that sounds horrible, but it’s the truth.”

He appr
eciated that she’d share that. He knew it was time to do the same thing.

“My mom was working late the night she was abducted
. He left her car and purse, but nothing else. For a while, I honestly believed maybe she left because she didn't want me anymore, but as I got older I realized the truth.”

She rested her head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Tony.”

“I was too for a long, long time. Now, I just hope one day I find her. I want to put her to rest and release that demon. Then, I can go on. It’s the one part of my past that I can’t let go. Once she’s found, I’ll be free.”

She could hear the pain in his voice. While he looked secure and strong on the outside, there was no doubt he was hurting.

“My mom wasn’t the best or worst,” he offered. “She was a young kid, saddled with a child she didn't want. Yes, I had love and hugs, but there was always this sadness when she looked at me. I guess, I look like my father. I have his eyes,” he said.

Staring up,
Jaxon gazed into the serene pools of aqua. “I love your eyes. They’re absolutely beautiful. I’ve never seen a color quite like it before.”

He smiled gently at her.

“I would catch my mom staring at me. Then, sometimes she’d cry. I hope it was because she missed my father, and not regretted me, but I’ll never be sure.”

“What happened after she died?” she asked, hoping he didn't mind.

“Ah, well that’s a fun time. I went into foster care. I was a preteen, angry, and hell bent on being horrible. I went from home to home, never finding a permanent place. My only saving grace was I had a brain. In school, I became lost in learning. I soaked it in and tried to escape life.”

She moved into his lap. “I love that you’re smart. Intelligent men are sexy.”

His body reacted to her perched in his lap. “Yeah?” he asked, staring at her lips. God, he wanted to get lost in them too.

“Uh huh,” she said, moving closer. When she paused, just an inch from his mouth, Jaxon whispered, “Can I kiss you?”

His whole body was on fire that this beautiful woman wanted to do that, and that she was asking permission. Hell, she could do whatever she wanted with him.

“You can always touch and kiss me, Jaxon. I’m always willing,” he replied, waiting to see if she would. If she
took this little step, it would be one more string which bound her to him.

Jaxon moved in, bringing her lips to his. They moved over his softly, and then heated as the kiss progressed. Turning
toward his body, she moved to straddle his lap.

Tony moaned as her lips and mouth plundered his. It was delicious and crazed all at once. He’d never experienced this with anyone before.

Her body was pressed to his and fit perfectly. The key opened the lock, and his heart was hers.

It was nearly earth shattering.

Jaxon fought to kiss him and yet still remain afloat. Tony Magnus was incredible. Not only was he sweet and gentle, he wanted her for all the good and bad in her life.

He knew her past and still wanted her future.

Her heart soared.

When her fingers went lower, to the buttons on his shirt, he was e
cstatic. His brain kept screaming over and over, pleading for more. There was nothing like feeling her touching and wanting him.

As she began undressing him, he did the same thing.

“Tony,” she whispered, breaking the kiss.

He couldn’t speak. All he wanted was to give this woman everything in the world.
In that moment, he knew he’d love her until their last breath.

In fact, he was ready to tell her. He would begin planning their future, and the way to keep her at his side.

As she got him free of his shirt, he had done the same. Now, he was faced with the creamy swells of breasts and the beautiful form of her body.

God, he was lost.

Pulling her against him, he dove into another kiss. As she ground her body against his, he was driven mad with need. Tony wanted to have her over and over again.

Through the kiss, her fingers wandered over his chest, making him
insane. He was to the point he couldn’t handle it anymore. Pulling away, he stared into her eyes.

“Get naked,” he demanded, pushing her from his lap.

If he didn't have her, he was going to go crazy. There was something about the scent and feel of this woman.

Jaxon didn't hesitate. Jumping up, she dropped her shirt, and undid her pants. The entire time, her pulse throbbed as Tony watched her. He reminded her of some big cat, watching his prey in the wild.

His eyes traversed her body, heating her blood and making her want to do anything he asked. There was something so powerful about his eyes, and she was helpless to the lure.

When she was finally completely naked, he watched her. Jaxon’s body was amazing. There was something so alluring about the curves.

It made his mouth water.

Before he could stand and strip himself, she was moving
toward him. As she knelt before him, he watched, trying to keep his heart from exploding.

“I want to taste you,” she said, waiting for him to say something.

Holy hell! His brain was on overload. One minute she was a fiery storm, the next she was kneeling before him and asking permission.

Yeah, this woman was an enigma.

“Please,” he said, groaning as her hand set him free. With gentle fingers, she stroked, teased, and got him to shake. He wanted her in the worst way.

“What do you want?” she asked, staring into those amazing eyes.

What didn't he want? At that moment, he wanted to bend her over the arm of the couch and make her scream his name.

“I want your mouth on me.”

She didn't hesitate.

As Jaxon began taking him in and out
of her mouth, Tony could barely think. The hot wet glide of her tongue and lips over his erection was maddening.

He couldn’t stop thinking about how she was offering to pleasure him. It pulled the barbarian in him closer to the surface. Yes, he wanted
Jaxon to service his needs.

Did it make him a horrible person?

Here was this younger woman willing to offer him a world of pleasure. He’d be crazy not to accept it.

When she began working him hard and fast, his heart skipped in his chest. She was his.

There could be no other way.

“Stop!” he ordered. Part of him wanted to see if she’d obey and when she did, his heart pounded faster.