Regina (2 page)

“Hey guys!” I said.

“Regina, you didn’t get off at your stop?”
Jane asked with concern.

“I guess not. I think I fell asleep. What
are you guys up to?” I asked getting up and sitting in the seat in
front of them.

But they didn’t answer. Jane and Renee were
looking out the window, in a daze. I looked out the bus window and
felt connected with the scenes outside. I gazed at the mobile homes
and trucks as we drove by them. My vision was captured by the
livestock of cows, sheep, and horses. Sometimes, a deer would run
by. We passed large bales of hay, lakes and little ponds with tiny
docks. I’d never seen so much of the country. I’m a born and breed
New York City girl, this was something I was in awe of.

While I was in rapture with the scenery,
Jane and Renee got off the bus. I looked up after a few minutes and
they were gone. Their book bags and any traces of them were gone. I
was confused; I didn’t feel the bus stop for them.

Before I could think any more of it, I
looked out the window again and saw the familiar Fort Knox style
house passing us by. The house was dark brick with a ten foot high
brick fence. Its massive roof was peeking out over the top of the
brick. The bus was taking a sharp curve and slowing down. Ahead,
the fog was rolling towards us. Before I could worry about walking
thru that, the bus turned to the right, away from the fog. I let
out a breath of relief.

The bus stopped and I got off. I felt happy
that I made it to my destination. The bus drove away as I realized
that I had no idea where I was. The tree line indicated a forest
was fifty feet away. A deserted house stood in the distance. The
overgrown grass swayed with the wind. I began to feel a little
nervous and stupid. Why did I get off the bus? I started looking
everywhere for a sign of where I was or someone who could help me.
Panic was making my breath come faster and the night was growing
cold. Hugging my shirt close to me, I felt someone looking at me.
My eyes searched the dark tree line and scanned the road for signs
of a person. I couldn’t see anyone. It was so cold now. Someone was
here, I can feel it. Was I supposed to meet someone here? The snow
began to fall as I tried to remember. Not Jane and Renee,
definitely not them. I laughed; they would’ve gotten off the bus
with me.

Shivering now, I tried to remember. My life
depended on it. The snow kept falling like someone was shaking it
hard on the world. Arrgh! If only I could remember. I think it was
a man and……..

I woke with a soft start and groaned with
pain. I began to wonder about my situation when I realized I was
aching from the stupid airplane seat. I must’ve fallen asleep, I
thought pleasantly. But the pleasant feeling fled quickly when I
realized I was closer to Lee.

How long was I asleep? How much longer till
we get to Austin? I was about to freak out again. I hadn’t mentally
prepared myself to get off the plane yet. I needed a few more
minutes to deal with this whole getting off the plane idea.

“Don’t worry sweetie, we still have an hour
till we land.” Mom whispered gently to me.

I looked over at my mom and saw her sweet
smile. Her golden blonde hair reminded me of Sleeping Beauty. Her
brown eyes were full of love as she smiled at me, which was easy to
see. But not so easy to see was her pain. Those eyes held lots of
tears and pain. Her petite body looked strong but was about to
break. Her whole outside looked together and strong, but it wasn’t.
After all, her mother just died.

“Thanks mom.” My voice was a delicate whisper
and my smile was sincere.

The funeral notice for my grandmother, Lydia
Underwood arrived by email two days ago. Mom cried for hours and
wouldn’t talk to anyone except dad. They stayed up in their room
for the whole night, talking and planning. I didn’t care to know
because I didn’t think their plans affected me. I didn’t know I had
grandparents, and I’m fifteen! I figured mom and dad would leave me
in New York while they went to the funeral. The whole thing would
take three to five days and mom would cry for a while but be ok. I
would definitely be there for her anytime she needed me. After all,
she never talked about them or showed she cared. Things should be
normal again.

But that didn’t happen. I was completely
wrong and still in shock over the whole thing.

I smiled at my mom and gave her a nod. Dad
was fast asleep on her shoulder. They must have moved seats when
they finally realized I was sitting so far away. Maybe this trip
would be good for them, like daddy said. They needed time together
to have some romance. The last thing my parents have had in these
past years is romance.

My dream journal was in my carry oncarryon
bag. A dream journal, I smirked at the thought. I had this thing
for a couple of years now. It practically jumped out at me when I
saw it in the bookstore. Back then, it was a brand new green
leather book with crisp golden pages. Now it was a beaten up
darkened thing with yellowed pages. I took it out started writing
about the dream.

Dear Diary, I had another dream. This time
it was on the ‘lone country road’. Same as always, I was on a bus
with Jane and Renee. It was night and I was fascinated with the
country setting……

I stopped writing and closed the journal. I
needed a minute to think before I wrote my dream in my journal. I
ordered another cola from the stewardess and sipped on it, clearing
my thoughts. The sky was amazing at night. I couldn’t see the stars
too well but the darkness reminded me of a scary movie. I opened my
journal to the first page and began reading from the beginning. My
younger handwriting was messy but easy to read.

Dear Diary. Is that what I’m supposed to
write? Or is it, Dear Journal? Hmm… I suppose it doesn’t matter. I
bought this journal to help me keep track of my dreams. So, I hope
I won’t be writing in it much. I haven’t told anyone about my
dreams. Everything began when I was around 9 years old. I didn’t
take much notice to them at first but now….. now I can’t shake the
feeling I’m being watched and manipulated in my everyday movements.
WTF is going on and what could that mean? Maybe those books are
right and dreams are nothing images of things we see every day. I’m
not sure, so this journal is going to hold my dreams.

Anyway, my dreams began with a house. A big,
beautiful house that I will run away from, screaming in horror if I
ever step into! I don’t know what the downstairs looks like, but it
is the upstairs and backyard where my dreams occur. Then, my dreams
started to include these long, dark and isolated roads. I assume
the dreams take place outside of the city; there are lots of trees,
grass, livestock and no one for miles. Plus, the oddest occurrences
have happened with my boyfriend Jeff. I use to feel sweet to him;
want to do things to show him how much I love him. Now, I find any
reason to fight and push him away. But, I feel that something out
there is happy for our fights and pushes me to do it. I swear I’m
not crazy! I just feel this pull…….

Let me start from the beginning, a long time
ago I started dreaming of a house. I don’t know where it’s located,
but I will never forget it. The upstairs is open with large windows
running along the wall that faces the backyard. The room has wood
paneling and feels like a cabin. The backyard is large and open. It
is enclosed by a long line of pine and oak trees. The woods. I feel
that something is there. It’s coming for me. The house won’t
protect me, in fact it feels as if the house is an intricate part
of someone else’s plan. What plan that is I have no idea. But, my
dreams return to the house consistently. I can be driving down a
country road and pull into my “home”. Then my dreams go crazy.
There’s an explosion, I’m running from something, trying to hide
from it. I usually end up at the house. I look out the large
windows and feel that something horrible is coming for me. Like a
runaway freight train, it is barreling towards me and it is
unstoppable.

I paused. Reading the first entry was
fascinating and a little frightening. When I started this journal,
I wanted to keep track of the weird dreams I was having. Not every
dream was the same all the time but the house, scenery, and roads
were. I could feel something chasing me there as well. No matter
how many years went by or how many times I dreamt, ‘they’ were
always there. I continued reading.

Um, Dear Diary? Ohhh, who
the hell cares!!?? It happened again! My dream, well nightmare,
took me back to the house. I was upstairs, looking out into the
forest. I felt something coming. Confused, I ran back inside to
hide in a closet. But when I opened the door, I was no longer in
the house. The dream shifted into a large office building. Before I
could get a sense of where I was, something shook the building
violently and the ceiling started to crash in. I ducked to avoid
the debris and ran to find the way out. Though I’m not sure how I
found it, I ended up in a bright, spectacular lobby. The entire
front was faced in glass panes, clear as can be. The beautiful sun
was shining and casting a beautiful glow into the lobby. The
escalators went from one story to another. From what I can
remember, the lobby had to be at least four stories high. Light
blue tiles and archways made it beautifully open.
But the windows exploded, another violent shake
sent most of the beautiful architecture into crumbles.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, we are now descending
into Austin Texas. Temperature is a warm 97 degrees with clear
skies…..”

He went on but I didn’t hear him.
Ninety-seven degrees!

“Great, I’m literally in hell.” I muttered
with a mad giggle. I began putting away my journal, locking it up
tight in my bag. My worst fear was someone would get their hands on
my journal and read it. Or worse, that I would actually find the
house of my nightmares. Thank goodness they were only
nightmares.

Chapter Three

I have no idea what Austin was like because
the airport was located outside the city. Lee is so small, the
closest airport is Austin, which was a whopping 50 miles away. So
we had to drive the last hour of the trip. I was beyond bored!
Everything was closed at the airport. We got our luggage and rental
car quickly due to the lateness of the day.

We stopped for dinner at a rundown little
diner in a town called Bastrop. The décor was a depressing yellow
and vomit 70’s green. Black and green bar stools lined a dark faux
wood bar. I looked for cowboys wearing spurs and Stetson hats.
Hmmm. I didn’t see any. Where were the southern bells with the hoop
skirts? Some guys were sitting on the stools at the bar started
looking at us. Did they have guns? I wondered. We chose a booth
that looked the cleanest and sat down. I wasn’t ready to talk yet
so I kept the ear buds in. I was grateful to mom and dad for
keeping the peace and not yelling me for not being a part of their
conversation. They knew I would talk when I was ready but I wasn’t
ready yet!

“What ya’ll want to drink?” The waitress
asked. It sounded like she said it ‘What cha’ll want to drank?’

I giggled and felt dad’s elbow poke my
ribs.

We gave her our drink orders. When she left,
my dad turned to me.

“So, I have deduced you’re listening to us
but not on speaking terms yet. Am I correct?” Daddy’s voice was
smooth and controlled.

I couldn’t help but laugh. He smiled his
handsome smile at me. My father’s sweet blue eyes are full of life
and humor. Soon, mom began laughing too. I’m sure we were quite a
sight, a couple of New York City slickers in Southern territory and
laughing madly at each other. It felt good. It felt normal.

Then I started crying, bawling right there in
a hillbilly diner. I wanted to feel normal with mom and dad again.
My world was turned upside down with one email. Overnight I’m
separated from everyone and everything I love. Feelings of panic,
hopelessness, and denial crowded my everyday thoughts. But here I
was, laughing with my parents as if things never happened.
Grandmother Lydia didn’t die and Lee was an unknown place that
didn’t exist in the perfect fairy tale bubble that I lived in.

“Baby, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to make
you cry.” He said gently. He stroked my arm and handed me a napkin.
I wiped my eyes quickly.

“No daddy, it wasn’t you. This feels like
being home with you guys.” I said it quickly too. I didn’t want to
admit I was over my anger but I longed to feel like a family again
with them.

I felt mom and dad looking guiltily at each
other. I didn’t mean to make them feel bad. Taking a deep breath, I
swallowed the rest of my teenage anger and looked at the menu. Mom
was analyzing my movements and decided I was ok. She gave her menu
a glance as well. I gave mom a little smile when I asked her if she
was hungry.

“Well, I do feel like I should eat something.
I’m not sure what, though.” Mom said looking at the menu in
confusion.

I understood her confusion. What the heck was
a Chicken Fried Chicken? And what, if any, similarities did it have
to the Chicken Fried Steak? Oh, wow, fried okra! Ewwwww! Was
everything in this place fried? For goodness sakes they even fry
the bacon. I was very surprised there wasn’t anything I could eat
on this menu that wouldn’t ruin my weight. I continued looking thru
the menu and found the burger to be the safest to order.

I think my parents were having the same
problem. We looked at each other and said “Burgers” in unison.

The burgers were very good. Mom and I split a
second and dad had three burgers total. I don’t know what it was,
but our moods were much higher after dinner. Daddy had us laughing
at the menu. We loved it when he went thru the items and giving a
country twang to them. Mom looked happier, her cheeks were rosier
and her spirit seemed lifted. Daddy naturally has that effect on us
but something about tonight enhanced his charisma and charm. I
could be mistaken, maybe it’s the light but daddy seems so happy
he’s…glowing.