Remember Me (6 page)

Before long, she fumbled at his jeans, flipping open the button and pulling down the zipper.

After a few seconds, however, he moved back and looked down, amused. “What
are
you doing?”

“The zipper’s stuck.”

He had a go himself but couldn’t free it. Cursing, he struggled out of the jeans and threw them to the floor irritably before he rid himself of his boxers. Snatching up the condom, he came back to her and gave her a warning look as she tried to hide her laughter.

She bit her lip. “Sorry. I was just wondering if someone’s trying to tell us this isn’t a good idea.”

“I don’t give a fuck.” He opened the packet and rolled the condom on. “I’m going to be inside you in minutes come hell or high water.”

She caught her breath at the heat in his eyes and then turned her head to let him kiss her neck and suck her earlobe as he moved his hand between her legs. She’d never been wanted like this before. His fingers slid easily into her slippery sex, and they both groaned at how turned on she was.

“Nice,” he murmured, starting to arouse her with firm strokes.

“Mm,” she agreed, drowsy with pleasure. “That’s...um...oh… I’m losing...the power of...speech...”

He gave a short laugh and kissed her deeply before lifting her. He wrapped her legs around his waist again. “I wanted to make this last for hours, but I don’t have the self-control, and you’re too gorgeous.”

“Here?” She gasped as she ran her fingers up the tight muscles of his arms, amazed at his strength.

“Here.” He lowered her until the tip of him parted her soft flesh, and then he slid inside her, right to the hilt. He rested his forehead on her shoulder. “Fucking hell.”

Impaled on him, she tipped her head back against the wall. “I think that sums it up.” She could feel him all the way inside her, thick and hard. “Oh Hamish, you feel incredible.”

 “You too, honey,” he said, his deep voice husky. He began to thrust inside her. His eyes were like hot blue flames, clearly enjoying watching her desire grow.
Ohmygod.
He was going to watch her as she came, as drunk on her bliss as she probably was on the wine.

She caught her breath, overwhelmed by his need. Sex had never been this hot, this passionate, before. She’d loved Lee, but he’d never set her on fire like this. Hamish had only to look at her to turn her on. Sliding her hands into his hair, she kissed him deeply, grazing her teeth on his bottom lip, and his answering growl reverberated all the way through her.

It wasn’t long before pleasure began to build in the pit of her stomach, and she closed her eyes. “Hamish...”

“Let it come, honey.”

“Oh...” Everything tightened around him, and he caught her mouth with his and captured her cries as she came. The muscles of his back tensed beneath her fingers, and he gasped as he reached his own climax, thrusting hard as her orgasm continued to roll over her in wave after pleasurable wave.

She returned to reality gradually, his skin damp beneath her fingers, conscious of him covering her face with small, light kisses on her cheeks, eyelids, temples, ears, and finally her mouth. There he lingered, and she sighed as his lips moved across hers and he stroked his tongue deep into her mouth, making her murmur appreciatively before he lifted his head.

“Hey.” He smiled at her.

“Hey.” She brought a hand up to his face and brushed his stubble with her thumb. “That was nice.”

“That’s the understatement of the year.” He kissed her again as he lifted her away from the wall and walked over to the bed. Still inside her, he lowered her down, his weight heavy on her. “It was sublime. Thank you.”

“Oh, you’re very welcome.”

He touched his nose to hers. “Sorry it was so quick. As I said, it’s been a while.”

“Jeez, don’t apologize. You may have noticed me beating you to the finishing line.”

He laughed. “I did notice. Even so, next time it’ll be better, I promise.”

Next time?

Better?

The cold night air cooled the sweat on her skin, and she shivered. He withdrew and disposed of the condom, then pulled back the duvet and threw it over her.

He sat on the edge of the bed. “Will you stay the night?”

She met his gaze, which was hopeful, almost pleading. “Okay.”

He looked relieved. “I’ll just let Brandon out and then I’ll be back.” He disappeared.

She visited the bathroom, and as she washed her hands, she stared at herself in the mirror above the basin.
You should go home now. Before you get in any deeper.
But she was fooling herself. As Hamish had said, even if they had only three weeks together—even if he only wanted her tonight—she’d take it. Leaving him would be hard, but at least she’d have these wonderful memories to keep her warm.

She dried her hands and returned to bed. Having dealt with Brandon, he came back to her, slid in, and wrapped his arms around her, warm against her back. “I’m so glad I met you,” he murmured.

“Me too.” How could she not be? He’d resuscitated her—brought her back into the land of the living. She couldn’t regret that. She swallowed down the bitter taste at the thought that this couldn’t be forever.
Everything must come to an end.
She wouldn’t grieve over something not yet dead. She’d enjoy it while she had it and worry about the consequences later.

They made love several more times that night, and again in the morning, and by then it was clear that wasn’t going to be the end of it.

Over the three weeks of Hamish’s leave, they practically lived together at the beach house. When he visited friends and family, Rose went with him, and it seemed their fingers were constantly linked, as if he couldn’t bear to let her go. When her holiday finished and she returned to work, he waited for her at the school gates at the end of the day, ready to whisk her away to the beach house again so he could keep her to himself.

They made love often, and he hadn’t been joking about making it better. He spent hours worshipping her body, taking time to arouse her, and introduced her to new positions and heights of pleasure she’d never dreamed possible. It was wonderful and heavenly, and at the end of the three weeks, Rose didn’t want to let him go.

But she had to. The last night they spent together was both exquisite and agonizing. At one point, after they’d make love, she cried. She tried to wipe her tears away, but he saw them and kissed them as he held her in his arms.

“What’s the matter?” he asked.

She shook her head. “Nothing.”

“Rose...” She knew that tone—his soldier’s command meant he wouldn’t rest until she told him.

“It’s just...it’s been good.”

“And that makes you cry?”

She pushed herself up and frowned at him. “Aren’t you sad it’s coming to an end?”

To her surprise, he laughed. “You really think I’m going to let you go, after all this?”

Uh-oh.

He rolled away from her. “I was going to save this for the morning, but I can’t have you in tears.” He retrieved something from the bedside drawer, walked around to her side of the bed, and dropped to one knee. He held out the small velvet box and opened it to reveal a glittering diamond ring. “Rose Nicholls, will you marry me?”

She stared at him. Thoughts and emotions spiraled and knotted inside her. He wanted to marry her. The stupid idiot. Hadn’t he listened to a word she’d said?

Without a word, she scooted across to the other side of the bed and got up. As she started pulling on her clothes, he rose and came around to stop her. “Wait. What’s the matter?”

“I told you at the beginning.” She shoved her feet in her jeans and buttoned them up, then picked up her shirt. “At the end of the three weeks, it comes to an end.”

He laughed. “I know that’s what you said, but you can’t seriously tell me you want this to finish.”

“No, of course not. But it’s going to.”

“Hey...” He caught her arm, turned her to face him, and cupped her face. “Perhaps there’s something else I should have said first. I love you.”

She bit her lip, hard. “Don’t.”

“Don’t you love me?”

“That’s irrelevant.” She stepped back and shoved her feet in her shoes.

“Wait. Come on, don’t be daft. This is
not
coming to an end.”

“Sorry, Hamish, but it is. It was always going to, and I told you that at the beginning—you should have listened.”

“Rose.” He cursed and pulled on his jeans as she walked out. “Where are you going?”

“Home,” she said miserably as he caught up with her. “I knew this would happen. It’s just...I’d hoped you understood—that this would be amicable.”

His face darkened. “This is ridiculous. This is the best thing I’ve ever had, and I know you feel the same way. I’m not going to let it finish.”

“It’s not up to you!” She glared at him. “Hamish, I am
not
going to be married to an Army man. I told you at the beginning and that hasn’t changed. I won’t do it. I’ve been there, remember? Moving around from base to base, changing schools, listening to my parents argue about it.” She couldn’t explain how unhappy her childhood had been. Her mother had been desperately lonely when her father went away for weeks at a time, and when he was home, she’d spent most of her time pleading for him to leave the Army. Neither Rose nor her mother had found it easy to make friends, and the frequent relocations had made it even harder. “I’m not going through it again.”

He caught her hands and brought them up to his lips. “I understand, and I know it wouldn’t be easy, but we’d have married quarters. We’d just have to make the most of the time we’d have together.”

“You’re not listening.” Anger bubbled up inside her. “I like it here. I have a good job—I don’t want to leave, certainly not to be an Army wife anyway.”

“Then stay here, and—”

“And what? See you when you come home on leave every six months?”

He stared at her helplessly. “I’ll do whatever you want to make it work.”

“Except leave the Army,” she said softly.

He looked confused. “I... I can’t. It’s my whole life. It’s my job—my career. I’m an Army man, Rose, it’s in my blood. I don’t think I
can
do anything else.”

She nodded, smiling through her tears. “I know. And I’m not asking you to.” She touched his face. “You’re a good man, and you’ll find someone else who won’t mind following you around the globe. But that girl—it’s not me. I’m sorry, but it’s not.”

Resignation settled over his features. “I don’t believe it.” His shoulders sagged. “I don’t believe it’s over. I can’t lose you.”

“I’m sorry.” Tears streamed down her cheeks. She slid her arms around him, and he tightened his around her and rested his chin on the top of her head. She buried her face in his chest. “I should have said no that very first night, I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s my fault,” he said, his voice filled with sorrow. “I thought I’d talk you around and you’d see we were meant to be together.”

He thought she didn’t love him enough. He couldn’t see how much this was tearing her up inside. “I love you, Hamish,” she told him.

He kissed her head. But she knew he didn’t believe her.

Chapter Seven

Even at eight o’clock, the warm, humid January air caused a trickle of sweat to run down Hamish’s back. He shifted on the lounger and tried to ignore the ache in his right leg. Brandon stood and shook himself, then trotted along the sand for a pee. Hamish took a swig of his beer and studied the girl curled up beside him waiting for his reaction to the story she’d just told him.

“So,” he said, “the first time I saw you, I nearly had concussion. I sense a theme here.”

Her lips curved. “Maybe.”

“We must have had something good going for me to propose.”

Her eyes returned to his, full of sadness. “Yes, we did.” She looked out to sea. “I regretted it, you know—saying no, I mean. Many times afterward. I missed you, very much. You must understand, I’d never done that before—slept with a guy on the first night I’d met him. You were something special.”

“Thank you.”

She bit her lip, obviously wondering whether to say something. She dropped her gaze to her hands and fiddled with her nails for a moment before raising her eyes to his again. “You didn’t believe I loved you when I said I couldn’t marry you. You thought it meant I didn’t love you enough, but that wasn’t it. I think that’s what cut me up most of all. I couldn’t make you believe me.”

His heart ached from her tangible pain. What a crazy situation to be in. He didn’t blame her at all—what woman would want an Army life, for Christ’s sake? Why had he even asked her? He must really have felt something for her.

His gaze caressed her long, brown hair, her fine features, her womanly curves. Yes, he thought he could understand why. Even though he didn’t remember her face, he felt a deep affection for her he couldn’t explain. He couldn’t recall their time together, but something deep inside him knew this girl was special.

Their eyes met, locked. He wanted to reach out and take her hand, but would she want that? They’d been close, but she’d ended their relationship. She’d turned down the soldier, the fit, athletic, whole man. What hope did the memory-deficient cripple have?

 A wave of desolation swept over him, and he dropped his gaze and shifted again on the lounger. His leg throbbed, and he had a headache. He got them a lot since the accident, which was to be expected, he supposed, considering he’d had half his life knocked clean out of his skull. He needed some painkillers and a good night’s sleep, and he’d feel better in the morning.

“You’re tired,” she observed. She stood and brushed briskly at her shorts. “Come on, you’re going to bed.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Now you’re being bossy.”

“Yep. Get up, sunshine. The body mends itself when it’s resting.”

Resentment at being treated like an invalid made him scowl, but at least she was staying a bit longer. He swung his legs over the lounger and pushed himself up with the crutches, then followed her indoors, Brandon trotting behind him.

She walked through to his room, obviously knowing the way, and pulled back the duvet. He hesitated in the doorway. “I’ll just get some painkillers.”