Remember to Breathe (Book One of the True Desires Series) (7 page)

“But you survived.”

“You're damn right I did. 'Cause I'm a survivor! Actually, you know what? You should let a professional handle this.  I'll be over in ten minutes.”

“Ha! Thanks but I think I've got this,” Allie says.

“You sure? Oh...well. Thanks  for calling the scary dangerous penis hotline anyway, friend...or whatever we are now. Friends are supposed to share you know,” Gina says.

The last thing Allie wants is a reminder of her dalliance with Gina's ex-boyfriend. Gina was always playing pranks on her but still, Allie isn't sure if Gina had considered the score settled or not and she was beyond reluctant to find out. At least not right now.  “Love you!” Allie says before hanging up.

“Can you hear me Nick?” Allie asks softly. “Are you having a nice dream?”

“Hmmm of course, Gina. I love you,” he says.

“Gina? No, this is Allie. Your wife? Allie?” Worry races through her stomach.
You and Gina? No....way.
Her first instinct is to slap him awake and confront him but  he  speaks again.

“Love you... Allie.”

“That's better,” Allie says, relieved. He's lost in a dream world after all- one obviously much nicer than what she experienced.  Now is definitely not the time for a fit of jealousy over something mumbled in a drug-influenced dream. She begins kissing him softly over his face and chest.  “Do you want me to join you?”

Allie frowns when he doesn't answer.  She strokes his side from his ribs to his thigh, eliciting a long, peaceful sigh as his eyes open. He blinks and smiles at her.

“Hi there,” Allie says.

“Hi,” he says. “I'll have two carrot pies. One. Two.”

“Shhh,” she says, chuckling.  He is obviously still under the influence of the pill. She runs her fingers along the length of his erection over his boxer briefs.  Allie giggles with pleasure- it is long and of average thickness.  It also has a nice curve to it- probably good for hitting all the right spots.  She salivates over the thought of it inside her.

“Sweet dreams always?”

“Maybe,” she says.

“Good dream,” he says before yawning. He smiles and closes his eyes as she strokes the length of his hard cock. “I got one of...those oh umm...oooh.” Allie is delighted. Never before had she seen him so relaxed when she touched him. Her skin warms.

He groans as she takes him in her mouth.  She swirls her tongue around the head while sucking on it and then removes herself, a string of spit connecting her lips to its throbbing head. His pupils are  swimming in lust.

“I'm going to drain you,” she says before running her tongue from his balls to the tip of his dick. Her panties are  already sticking. She bunches them and runs them up and down and from side to side over her slit. She touches the juices that spill out of her and gives him a sample. “ A taste of what you've been missing,” she says. His enjoyment is obvious as he sucks and licks  her wet fingers .

She mounts him as though to find a brief escape from the rising heat, legs clamped to his sides. She parts her wet panties for the tip of his hot cock which she swirls around her clit and her lips before taking him inside her, exhaling as though to make room.
Oh yess.

He reaches forward with both arms-one hand caressing the side of her breast under her bra while massaging and pressing her clit with his thumb. He is good at it.
Suspiciously good for a celibate man
, Allie thinks, but the electricity of his movements overwhelm this line of thought.

She grabs hold of her ankle, leans back and closes her eyes as she grinds and bounces on him, gasping from the pain and the pleasure, savoring the suction sound her pussy makes from riding his cock up and down. She cups his balls which had tightened up close to his groin.  Allie keeps him inside her while she leans over to bite his lower lip, her hair falling around his face. He reaches around and fumbles with her bra, then tries to pull it off. She unclasps it herself, letting it fall down as she rights herself back on his lap. He squeezes her breasts with increasing pressure as she increases her pace. They moan in unison.

“You like that?”

“I like to go fast with the carrot pies, yes I do,”  he says.

Allie pauses.
What?
And then she laughs out loud.  All of this pleasure had made her  temporarily forget that he had taken the pill.
Oh well, too late to stop now...

His hands go to her legs to spread them out and then to her waist where he presses in. He hoists her above his pelvis and thrusts into her, working the the top of his cock into her like a jackhammer. He pauses. Allie squirms as her nerve endings register the ecstasy flooding though them.  “Fuck me!” she commands.  She  tries to bounce down on him but he holds her firm. She squeals and reaches down to rake his chest. This- this holding her up while he surreptitiously pounds away at her for minutes on end is a feat of athleticism and stamina she wasn't aware he was capable of. Allie braces herself on his wrists.

“Ooooooooooooooooh!!'

He falls out out of her. She puts him back in and they resume. Allie wails louder and off key.  Every fourth or fifth thrust, he slams her down on him, forcing a staccato burst from Allie and making her eyes pop wide open in pain and ecstasy. Just as she is ready to announce that she wants to go at a slower pace, he pulls her in and sits up. She wraps her legs around him and flings her bra off. Moist skin slips against moist skin in controlled chaos, pulses pound even more chaotically. She feels an arm around her and her hair pulled, his hot breath on her neck as they grind their bodies together in a syncopation that is at once perfect and disjointed. Allie is losing the feeling in her hands and feet, her head is getting light and woozy and stars are winking around her vision but she doesn't care. All that matters is this...this
melding.

“I want you to come,” she says, sensing he is close.

“Hi, ” he says. “What are we doing today?” He grins.

She runs her hands through his hair. Her concern for his well-being grows. She kisses him and feels him withdraw somewhat. He pauses, before giving a rapid series of shallow thrusts, then a deep one. He shivers and clenches and groans as he erupts inside her. She closes her eyes, exhales and whimpers a little. They fall back to the pillows and lie together, hearts racing, the energy they found still cycling though their bodies. He kisses her long and slow and then moves her head to his chest. “I love you Allie,” he says. 

Allie exhales. She could count the number of times he'd said that to her on one hand. As she listens to his heartbeat, a sense of calm comes over her.
Things are going to be okay,
she thinks. He is- or was- just dealing with a little temporary fogginess from the pill is all. She brushes her matted hair off her face and  kisses him on the cheek.

Within an hour, Kevin is in his favorite chair, engrossed in a pile of prospectuses.
Always working.
He
seems
to be back to normal, but Allie isn't totally convinced so she tests him by asking what he wants to do for lunch. “Carrot pies maybe? One. Two? Go fast with the carrot pies?”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“So what did you dream about?” she asks. “Was it me?”

“Maybe.”

“You don't have to lie. I won't get jealous- unless you were dreaming about Gina. Then you should lie.”

“ I dunno. I kept slipping. I don't remember. But I do know that it was hard to tell what was real and what was a dream. Both were very good though, I can tell you that.”

“So it
was
about Gina!” Allie jokes.  “Well played,” she says, remembering that her dream had evaporated too.

They try sleeping in the same bed. And they make love twice more but both times, it's short lived and he seems distracted. On the night of the second lovemaking session, she wakes up from an inadvertent blow to her chin. He thrashes in his sleep the next night too, this time calling out Gina's name.

Gina.
Maybe he had only been celibate with her because Gina was fulfilling his needs all along?
Allie decides to confront him in the morning. But when she awakens, she finds that he and his Mercedes and most of his clothes are gone. There is a note on his bed that says simply:

Went to my brother's house.

Allie is racked with fear and suspicion. She had never met his brother.  Kevin's parents had died in a car crash a few years before she had met him and he wasn't close with any of his remaining family, especially not his brother. She doesn't even know where he lives, only that it is somewhere in the West.

She calls Kevin and then his office but no one answers. She calls Gina.

“
I don't know what's wrong,” Allie says. She describes what had been happening and what had just happened  and then her tone suddenly takes a caustic turn. “Is it you? Have you been fucking him? Trying to get back at me for that stupid thing I did in college?” The severity of her words surprises even Allie.

“WHAT?”

“ Don't play dumb.”

“You're being paranoid. You just need to get some rest.”

“No. You need to tell me what's going on. Right now. I know how you flirt with him. It's all starting to add up.”

“Yes Allie. I've been fucking him. Is the sarcasm in my voice thick enough?  I hope so, because if you're going to make an accusation like this, I want you to choke on it bitch. Goodbye.”

Allie grabs her keys and drives to Gina's house, bracing herself to see Kevin's car in her driveway. It isn't. She drives to his office. He isn't there either. Maybe he really is at his brother's? Allie calls Gina and leaves a non-apology apology on her voicemail.

Allie and Gina are reconciling the next day when Kevin beeps in. He is apologetic and explains that he is in Utah and is feeling better. Allie can hear the miles and exhaustion in his voice.

Allie thinks they have an understanding. She suggests  dinner out in a day or two.

“There's that new sushi restaurant on Park,” she says.

“ It will have to wait. I can work from here, no problem. I just need to be away for a little while. Take a few weeks to clear my head in the outdoors. Hopefully the place will still be in business by then,” he says.

Allie lets him know that if he wants to talk, it will be up to him to make contact.

“I'll call you in a couple days,” he says. But he doesn't.

A few weeks turn into four months. She misses and resents him.

Gina applies pressure for her to move on. Without asking, she signs Allie up for dating websites. “Let's face it; not just any man will do for my Allie and you're not getting any younger my dear, so we need to cast as wide a net as possible. At least one new website a week, ” she insists.

Allie protests but knows it's of no use. Gina is a force of nature, and Allie feels she at least owes Gina this after having accused her of sleeping with Kevin.   Gina seems to relish dispensing  selective updates on the latest with the online love life she has created for Allie. Allie thinks she knows Gina very well so it surprises her that it had taken so much time to  realize that she should be concerned about one particular aspect of online dating.

“Just tell me you're not having me do any cyber-sex.”

“....”

“Gina.”

“Whaaaaat?”

“GINA!”

“That term...cyber-sex...It's just such an..anachro-”