Remembering You: Pushing the Boundaries, Prequel (4 page)

But finally Davis merely raised an eyebrow. “That guy is a hell of a police officer. And a military legend. You related to him?”

Coming from an officer like Davis, that was pretty much a declaration of love…for the general, anyway. And if he was going all chick-flick over this person, General Lang must really be something big. In a trained-in-deadly-combat, highly regimented kind of way.

Davis was like that.

But Ben wanted to laugh. It was clear Nina disliked even the idea of the police. No way was she related to an apparent paragon of both the police force and the army.

So it was no small shock when she nodded tightly and said, “Yeah. He’s my dad.”

Chapter Four

Thank God Ben had told his friends to fuck off—in a joking way, of course—as soon as she’d admitted to her relationship to her dad.

Because Nina was about to snap.

If this is what being back home was going to be like from now on, having to hear all kinds of great things about him from people and not being able to tell them the truth about it, then conscience be damned. She’d be outta here so fast her tires would burn up the pavement.

Ben’s SWAT friends proceeded to ignore them and went back to joking around as Ben slid onto the stool next to her.

Please don’t ask about my dad
, she silently begged, trying not to gulp down her drink.

She should have known Ben would be SWAT. The first guy in years she’d been ragingly attracted to was, of course, in a profession that would regularly expose him to high-stakes danger.

Just like her dad, and look at him now. Look what he’d done to himself because he hadn’t been able to stay away from danger.

That was exactly why she had to stay away from Ben.

He was dangerous.

She shouldn’t get involved with him.

Of course, he hadn’t asked her to. But she could feel the pull, the attraction between them, and she didn’t doubt he felt it too. So for now, she wasn’t going to outright ignore him, but after this drink, she was going to get up and walk away and never see him again.

What a shame.

Few men of her acquaintance were this genuinely sexy. And she knew a lot of men. Compared to his freshly shaven, buttoned-up look of this morning, this version of Ben was much more disheveled. His sleeves were rolled back, he was sporting a distinct shadow along his jawline, and the way he was leaning against the bar made her think of stepping between his legs and allowing him to support her as she kissed him.

She was going to inhale this cocktail. Better than fantasizing about a guy who was the non-military version of her dad. The man who’d left her and her mother biting their nails in fear for his life for nearly two decades while he was stationed all over the world, was not someone she looked up to.

Some military families traveled with the spouse or parent, but not the Langs. Especially once he became an officer, her dad could have gotten housing for them near to wherever he was stationed, but he’d refused to do so, and the distance made their constant worrying over him even more stressful.

Ironically, it was because he’d wanted the American Dream for his little girl that he’d insisted Nina and her mom stay behind in Greenbriar while he hoisted the flag and kept order on the other side of the world. When he came home on leave, once or twice a year, he never failed to tell her how important it was to cherish the white picket fence she’d scratched her initials on, the friends she’d had since grade school and all the other things this kind of permanence provided.

But it was all tainted. He’d stay for a couple of weeks, until Nina would finally relax, being able to see him and hug him every day, and then he was off again to put himself in danger and send his wife and daughter into an emotional tailspin.

She’d never said anything to him about it, though. Neither had Mama. Once, when Nina was seven and had complained she was having nightmares about her dad dying, Mama had told her, “It’s because you love him so much. But never say anything about it to him. He already feels guilty for not being with us. It would only make things worse.”

Nina had been about to go to college when Mama died—ten years ago—and the time and distance between her and her dad caused them to drift apart, speaking only occasionally on the phone. He sent her money, but she’d refused to use it. Instead, she’d socked it away in investment accounts and forced it out of her mind. She’d worked her own way through college to supplement the scholarship she’d gotten, and Jerry had helped her get some contacts in New York right after graduation. From there, she’d earned her stripes as doggedly as Dad had earned his. They might have been different badges of honor, but at least she stood on equal enough footing now. She could tell him how afraid she had been as a little girl, yell at him for making her love him so much and then abandoning her to go risk his life so far away.

Except, even though she was all grown up and finally had her chance, none of those words would even register with him.

Most days she was lucky if her dad even knew her name, and yet he was the reason she’d come back to Greenbriar.

After all these years, she’d gotten the permanence she had craved from him as a girl. But it had come with a price.

“So. You’re a journalist. That’s…uh…really interesting.” Ben’s voice pulled her out of her reverie.

She looked at him askance. “Why do I get the feeling you don’t actually think it’s great?”

That earned her a grin. A real one, not forced.

“Reporters often get in the way of operations. When things are high pressure and tense, they usually only add to the stress, not make it better.”

She rolled her eyes. “That means you haven’t worked with very good reporters.”

He barked out a laugh at her response, and even though she knew it sounded cocky, it was true. She never took a risk with anyone else’s life, and she never put more people in danger just to get a story.

Her own life? Her own self in danger? Sure, plenty of times.

He shrugged. “I guess.”

“Maybe you don’t like letting others see you sweat.”

But he didn’t laugh, and she couldn’t help but wonder if maybe she’d hit too close to the mark. Reporters were part and parcel of high-profile crimes. If Ben was SWAT and he’d been on the front lines in the past, chances are he’d been under the watchful eye of a journalist or two.

She wanted to ask him about it. What kind of work he did, exactly. What his specialty was…

“Can I buy you another drink?”

His question made her look down at her glass. It was almost empty. Wow, how did that happen?

She smiled gently. Ben was a nice guy. She was only upset about his being a police officer because she had allowed herself to imagine, for a brief moment this morning, she might be able to act on her attraction with him and ask him out. She hadn’t been on a real date in…oh, ages.

But then he’d told her what he did for a living, and she couldn’t.

Sure, intellectually she knew just because Dad had finally come home wounded didn’t mean all police officers were going to get hurt, or even killed. But emotionally, she had a hard time accepting it. Not after all those years of worry over his safety had culminated in such a horrible injury.

No. Ben Crewes would just be that guy who ran into her twice in one day.

“Thanks, but one was enough. I needed something to take the edge off this day,” she replied. “Besides, I have to drive home. But why don’t I buy you one to remember me by? I’m about to head out and get some sleep in before another long day at work tomorrow.”

He chuckled. “I don’t think I’ve ever had a woman offer to buy me a drink before. And certainly not as a souvenir of our acquaintance.”

She winked at him. “I’m not like most women.”

He laughed loudly this time, drawing a few eyes in their direction, including those of his buddies. She’d forgotten they were there. But the whiskey was already working, and she was relaxed enough that she didn’t rush to leave right away.

In fact, maybe she was feeling a bit too relaxed. Ben’s lazy smile was making her feel all warm and fuzzy, and her hand itched to reach out and slip her fingers inside his shirt.

Forget it and go home. You’re lonely. And more alone than you’ve ever been, when it comes down to it. Don’t make a mistake because you’re feeling a bit off kilter.

Funny. She rarely felt the way she did now, like she was in danger of losing something special in her life. There had been one time, three years ago, when she had finally come home for a few weeks to take care of her house. She had kept the one she grew up in even after Mom had died, hiring a property management company to rent it out. But the renters at the time had apparently done so much damage to one of the bedrooms the management company wanted her to see it to decide whether to repair it or tear out the section completely and rebuild.

The renters had fled in the night. But Nina hadn’t cared. She’d only stared at the remains of her childhood bedroom, the walls smashed and spray-painted, the hardwood floor buckled with water damage, and felt the stabbing pain in her chest of some deep emotional loss.

But she’d kept her cool, even when the acute pain moved lower into her abdomen, and all during the walk-through. By the time she’d told the property manager the room should be ripped down and rebuilt, she could barely talk from the pain.

That was when she’d been rushed to the hospital for an emergency appendectomy, though she swore to this day it was seeing her childhood destroyed that had caused it to rupture in the first place.

“You sure you have to leave?” Ben asked softly.

Strange that she was thinking of that night right now. She’d been wheeled into a shared room after her surgery to rest, fallen asleep from all the pain meds she’d been on, and had woken up in semi-darkness just in time to hear a woman say,
I can’t see you anymore.

She’d felt so bad for the poor guy who’d been left right after some kind of procedure. She’d imagined him alone and hurting and hadn’t been able to resist saying something through the curtain separating them.

Something about the guy she’d ended up talking to for hours that night had pulled at her in a way few people had ever been able to do. Made her want to be with him, to stay with him, even though ever since she’d finished college, Nina had never been able to stick around for long in one place.

Like father, like daughter. It was what had made her such a successful reporter—the willingness to pack up and go at a moment’s notice. So why did the words she was about to say to Ben make her feel stupid?

“Yeah, I do. I have to leave.”

Disappointment flashed across his face, quickly replaced by an understanding nod. But she’d seen the regret before he’d covered it up, and she wanted to kick herself for hurting him. The instinct that had time and again saved her life as a reporter was now telling her that she should have known better than that.

Walking away felt wrong. Cowardly.

You’re crazy. You met him only this morning. It’s not like he’s your soul mate.

But how else were soul mates supposed to meet? Maybe this morning’s accident had been the universe’s way to get them together.

“I’ll walk you to your car,” he offered, gesturing to the bartender and pulling out his wallet, but she protested out of habit.

“It’s okay. I’m used to taking care of myself. And I’ve already pulled you away from your friends for too long,” she assured him.

But he gave her a weird look in reply. The same kind of assessment the bartender had when she’d first come in.

“What’s that for?”

He turned, his eyes pointedly scanning the room. “You realize you’re the only woman in here, right?”

She didn’t even bother turning on her barstool to see for herself. She was sure he was right, for God’s sake. But it upset her that she hadn’t actually realized it when she’d walked in.

Fuck, I’m usually more observant.

“I’m sure you are, but it looks like you’ve had a rough day.”

“Did I say that out loud?”

Ben laughed at her surprise. “Yep. Definitely a rough day.” He put some money on the bar and she started to object when she realized he had also paid for her drink, but he stopped her.

“It’s not every day I get to treat a beautiful woman to some much-needed relaxation.”

I have a much better way you can help me relax.
The thought accompanied an image of Ben, naked and thrusting into her as she convulsed around his cock, and heat flooded her body, making her feel suddenly threatened. She shouldn’t have been surprised, given how attracted she was to him, but the intensity of it caused her to stand upright a little too fast. She stumbled, her foot catching on the last rung of the stool, and she pitched forward.

Warm, strong arms closed around her. “Steady there, sweetheart,” his soft voice caressed her ear.

Steady? Well, definitely not now. Not anymore. She was pressed full length against him and she could feel the heat of his body beneath hers. Her hands were resting lightly against his hard chest, and she couldn’t stop herself from moving them down, ever so slightly, stroking the tight muscle underneath. His body flinched at the touch and his grip around her tightened almost imperceptibly.

Shit. What are you doing?

Her cheeks heated and she sprang back immediately.

“I’m—I’m sorry, I’m usually not so clumsy, either,” she insisted, but it came out weak. She was certainly doing a lot of apologizing today. He probably thought she was a dimwit and a klutz. But he didn’t say anything, just shook his head, and Nina was suddenly very aware of his friends watching them surreptitiously.

One of them—Brewer, she thought his name was—turned to her. “You heading out?”

“I am. But it was so nice to meet all of you, and good to run into you again, Ben.”

She’d meant it as a brush-off, to send him the message she’d get to her car all right on her own, but he grabbed his jacket from the barstool he’d been sitting on earlier and walked toward her.

“I said I’ll walk you to your car.”

She stared at him for a moment, wondering whether to argue with him in front of his friends, but luckily one of them—the one with the lazy bedroom smile and shining blond hair—spoke up.

“No use denying Crewes what he wants, girl,” Goldilocks told her. “If you refuse, he’ll still walk a few feet behind you until he’s sure you’re safely in your car and driving away.”

No use denying him what he wants.

He wanted her, she could tell. And she wanted him, probably just as obviously. That brief touch when she’d fallen against him had only whetted her appetite for more. She wanted to feel him again, this time without clothes between them.

Maybe one night wouldn’t hurt. It wasn’t getting involved. Just…sex between acquaintances.