Rescue Me (30 page)

“Are you sure?”

Monica took a frustrated breath. “Are you seriously this hardheaded? I swear, you and your brother are two of a kind.”

“Hey,” Eli said with an affronted snort.

Monica rolled her eyes at her husband, then turned back to Alex. “They’re going to X-ray her head just to make sure everything’s okay—”

Alex cut her off. “I thought you said she’s going to be fine.”

“It’s customary with a head injury,” Renee provided. “It doesn’t mean there’s anything serious.”

“Thank you,” Monica said. “At least I’ve got one voice of reason here.”

Eli cleared his throat, but Monica ignored him. “Are we clear?” she asked Alex.

“Yeah,” he said with a relieved sigh. “So, what am I supposed to do now?”

“Look, if you really want to help, go to the blood bank on the third floor and donate blood,” Monica suggested.

The door flew open.

“Dr. Gardner Holmes, we have an MVA pulling in,” a nurse called.

Monica turned back to them. “I have to go. After you’re done at the blood bank, come back down to the ER waiting room. I’ll give you an update on Jasmine as soon as I can.” She looked directly at Renee. “Will you be here for a while?”

Renee nodded. “I’m not leaving until Alex does,” she said.

“Good. Keep him away from radiology. They don’t need him pestering them.”

After Monica had left and they were alone, Renee tugged on Alex’s arm. His face was devoid of emotion, though his apprehension was so thick it was practically another occupant in the room.

“Alex, they’re going to need this room. We have to go,” Renee urged.

He looked down at her, the pain in his eyes causing her chest to ache in sympathy.

“I’m sorry about overreacting.” Alex’s voice broke. “It’s just that … she’s everything, Renee. She’s the reason I breathe.”

“I know, Alex, but Jasmine is going to be fine.” Renee tugged at his arm. “Come on. Let’s go down to the blood bank.”

“You know you can go home if you want to.”

“I don’t want to,” Renee said. “Not until you do.”

Alex cupped her face in his palm and stared into her eyes. “Thank you for standing by my side.”

She covered his hand with her own. “There’s no other place I’d rather be.”

Alex could hardly recall the trek from the ER to the blood blank, then back to the ER waiting room. His mind was still clouded by a fog of uncertainty too thick for the surrounding environment to penetrate. All he could think about was his baby lying on the ground, not making a sound. That trail of blood trickling from her ear.

For a moment, before she’d awakened in his arms, his mind had jumped to the most horrific of conclusions.

There was no such thing as life without Jasmine. She had been the center of his universe from the moment she was conceived. He could not remember his life’s purpose before she was born. Any personal dreams or goals he’d held instantly dissipated the moment he laid eyes on that tiny, precious baby sucking her fingers in the hospital’s nursery ward.

Now his little girl was stretched out on an X-ray table with a two inch gash on her head.

“I can’t take this,” Alex whispered. “I need to know what’s going on.” He pushed up from the chair, but Renee caught his arm.

“Alex.” Her calm, sensible voice reined him in again. The doctors of Methodist Memorial had Renee to thank for him not barging in on them a half dozen times. She had been a rock at his side, offering support in the way she lightly squeezed his hand or rubbed the small of his back when he leaned over with his head bowed to pray.

Alex settled back into his seat. He hunched his back, placed his head in his hands, and tried to stave off the tears that had been threatening to fall. Other than the one he’d allowed to escape back in the emergency room, he’d been pretty successful at it. Renee started rubbing his back in sure, soothing circles.

“Do you need anything?” she asked.

He shook his head. He wanted to say he was okay. But
that lie was too far from the truth for him to pull it off. He wouldn’t truly be okay until he held his baby girl in his arms.

Alex stopped her with a hand to her shoulder. “Renee, you know you don’t have to stay here. You have work tomorrow.”

“Alex, if you tell me to go home one more time, I’m going to punch you. I told you I’m not leaving until you do.”

“But you don’t have to st—”

She pressed two fingers to his lips. “I want to stay,” she said. “If I went home, I would have you on the phone every five minutes for an update. I’d rather just stick around so I can get the news firsthand.”

Alex brought her into his arms and squeezed. “Thank you,” he said, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head.

“You’re welcome,” she answered, pulling him even closer to her body. She raised her head from his chest and looked up at him. “Now, are you sure I can’t get you anything? Some chips from the vending machine, maybe?”

“I can’t eat,” Alex admitted.

“Promise you’ll let me know if you need anything.”

Several minutes later, Monica came through the door. Alex stood. The relieved smile that broke across her face caused Alex’s heart to catch in his throat.

“Her X-ray came back negative,” Monica said. “They’re stitching her up right now.”

Relief rushed through his veins at a startling rate, turning his muscles into mush. Alex sank down, grateful there was a chair to catch him.

Alex turned to Renee. “I want you to go home,” he told her.

She punched his arm. “I warned you I would do that if you said those words again,” she said with a laugh.

For the first time since he had seen Jasmine lying on the ground with a trail of blood flowing down her face, Alex allowed himself to feel something other than pure misery.
Renee was the only one who could elicit a smile from him at this moment.

“Sorry,” he said.

“How long before we can see her?” Renee asked Monica.

“It shouldn’t be too long.”

“I just need to see her with my own eyes,” Alex said. He had to know for himself that his baby really was okay.

Monica was paged to the ER.

Alex put his arm around Renee’s shoulder and pulled her closer into his body. “Would it be inappropriate to kiss you in the middle of a hospital waiting room?” he asked.

“Probably,” Renee said, “but I doubt we’d be the first to do so. Receiving good news tends to put people in the mood,” she said.

Alex lowered his mouth to hers and eased into a slow, thorough kiss. He had been alone for over two years, had handled his share of scrapes and bug bites, but Alex sent up a special prayer of thanks that he had not had to face this by himself. Just being in the same space he occupied, Renee had offered a sense of comfort and strength Alex hadn’t realized he’d been missing.

“Thank you for not listening all those times I told you to go on home,” he said.

“You’re welcome,” she answered.

She wrapped her arm around his waist and cradled her head against his chest. They sat that way for a long time. Now that Jasmine was out of the woods, he could finally relax.

The waiting room door opened. Alex looked up from where he rested his jaw on Renee’s head. Dread shot up his spine at the cautious look on Monica’s face.

“What happened?” Alex asked, bounding from the chair.

Monica looked from Renee to Alex. “Uh, Alex, can I speak to you in the hallway?” she asked.

Instant fear held his gut in a Vise Grip, tightening with each nanosecond that passed.

“What is it?” he asked.

“Alex—”

“What’s happened to my little girl?”

“No, she’s fine,” Monica said, and Alex shuddered with relief once again. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. Jasmine is still being stitched up.”

“Then what’s wrong?” Alex asked. “Alex, please just step into the hallway with me.” “I’m going to tell Renee whatever you tell me, so just say it,” he said.

Monica wiped her palms on the sides of her white lab coat. “It’s about the blood you donated to the blood bank,” she said.

“What about it? Is there something wrong with me?”

“No, no,” Monica said. “Lord, how am I supposed to do this?”

“Monica, what in the hell is going on?” Alex yelled.

“Your blood type is AB positive.”

“I know that.”

“Jasmine is O-positive,” Monica said. She looked at Renee, who’d squeezed his fingers with one hand and covered her mouth with the other.

Alex shook his head. “So? What the hell does that matter?”

Monica’s eyes were filled with sympathy. “Those blood types don’t match up, Alex. It’s medically impossible that Jasmine is your biological daughter.”

Chapter Twenty four

 

Renee felt the jolt that seemed to shoot through Alex’s body at Monica’s announcement. He dropped her hand.

“You’ll need to take a DNA test to be sure,” Monica continued.

“That’s… no… something got mixed up,” Alex said,
backing up, as if he could physically distance himself from his sister in law’s words.

“Alex.” Renee went for his hand, but he shook her off.

“That’s bullshit,” he said.

Monica held her hands out, pleading. “Alex, don’t you think I checked and rechecked before coming to see you?”

“You got something wrong,” he said. “Somebody’s got something wrong.”

“Alex, please,” Monica implored.

He brushed past her and burst out the door. Renee went after him, but Monica caught her arm.

“Maybe he should be alone for a bit,” Monica said.

“I don’t think so,” Renee said, and took off after Alex. She saw him turn the corner, and she ran down the corridor after him.

“Alex!” Renee called, but he ignored her. “Alex!”

He entered a door at the end of the hallway. Renee was there in a matter of seconds, pushing through what she realized was the entryway to the stairwell. She heard Alex as he bounded down the stairs.

“Alex!” she called.

By the time she got to the bottom of the stairwell, Renee knew there was no way she would find him. But when she pushed through the door that led to an alley, she found Alex facing the hospital’s exterior wall, his head resting on his arms as he leaned against the brick.

“Alex?”

“Just leave.” The words were barely audible.

Renee took a cautious step forward. “Alex, please talk to me.”

He whipped around, his handsome face contorted in anger and heartbreaking anguish. “What the hell do you expect me to say?” he asked, bearing down on her. “You were there. You heard Monica,” he said, his voice rising with every word. “My baby girl isn’t really mine. The child I’ve raised for six
years—who is my
life
—isn’t my daughter. What the hell do you want me to say to that?”

He picked up an empty crate and slammed it on the ground, the wood splintering into a dozen pieces.

Renee jumped back. Shock and fear stalked through her at the aggression radiating from Alex. It pulsed through the air surrounding them. She’d witnessed the look in Alex’s eyes before, years ago, on an almost daily basis. Memories of the violence she’d been subjected to at her father’s hand pummeled her.

“What’s the matter, Renee? You can’t think of anything to say, either, can you?” Alex asked.

“Alex, don’t do this,” she said.

He took another step forward. “What? I’m just looking for a little help here. You want to help, right?”

He backed her up against the wall, his large body framing hers.

“Help me out, Renee. What’s a guy supposed to do when he finds out his whore of a wife had another man’s baby? There’s not really a book on how to deal with this situation, is there?” he yelled, slapping the building next to her head.

Renee jumped. She brought her fist to her mouth, fighting back a scream. She would not cave to fear. Not again. Never again.

But she couldn’t fight this.

Ducking under Alex’s arm, Renee escaped his hold. And ran.

Alex covered his face with his hands and sank to his knees, the fight draining from his body in a rush, leaving in its wake a sense of emptiness that filled every chamber of his heart.

Was he really expected to function after this? Was he supposed to walk and talk? Breathe? Exist? How could anybody expect him to behave like a normal human being after having his world shattered?

His baby girl.

How could his baby girl not be his? How could he not know?

God, he would give anything to have the chance to face Chantal right now. He wanted to feel his hands wrapped around her throat. He wanted to look into her eyes as he slowly drained the life out of her.

“Alex?”

His back stiffened at the sound of his brother’s voice.

“Just leave me alone, E.”

“Alex, you can’t sit out here all night.” This from Monica.

He was not dealing with the two of them right now. “I told you to leave me alone,” he said.

Alex flinched when a hand gripped his shoulder, but he didn’t have the strength to knock it away. “Alex, come on,” Eli said. “We can go to my office if you want to.”

“I don’t know what I want to do,” he answered. Except possibly die. Maybe then the pain would go away. But Alex doubted even death could ease the ache coursing through him.

“Come on,” Eli encouraged.

At his brother’s urging, Alex finally stood. He stared at Eli and was nearly brought back to his knees by the understanding on his brother’s face.

Eli opened his arms. “I’m so sorry, man,” he said.

He couldn’t shoulder this on his own a second longer. Alex fell into his brother’s arms and sobbed like a child.

Chapter Twenty five

 

Renee swiped viciously at the tears that continued to stream down her face. She looked in the rearview and snorted at the vision that stared back at her. Eyes red and puffy. Nose the color of a bing cherry. Cheeks soaked with an onslaught of tears that would not stop.

She stopped at a red light and leaned her head back against the headrest. She shut her eyes, but quickly opened them when Alex’s enraged face popped into her mind’s eye. Cold fear raced down Renee’s spine at the thought of the hostility she’d witnessed; violence she didn’t think Alex was capable of.

She’d been on the receiving end of what happened when that type of rage was released. Her fingers trembled as they traveled idly along the scar behind her ear. It was her reminder, her one true anchor that kept her grounded in the harsh reality of what people who supposedly loved you could do when they turned violent.

Behind her, a car horn blew.

Renee pressed on the accelerator and told herself to put Alex out of her mind before she cracked her car against a tree.

Just like Alex’s wife had done. But not before she’d lied to her husband about who had fathered her child.

“Oh God, Alex.”

He had every right to rage. It was the ultimate betrayal. To discover the child he’d raised and loved as his own was a product of one of his wife’s affairs. Even though she’d seen it in his eyes, Renee knew she would never comprehend the pure anguish Alex must be feeling at this moment. For a second, he thought he would lose Jasmine to night. In a way, he had.

“And I left him to deal with it on his own,” Renee whispered. After everything Alex had done for her, when it had come time for her to be there for him, she’d left. And what was her excuse? He’d shattered a crate on the ground? He was justified in doing that and more. But there was no excuse for her cowardice. She’d allowed her past demons to rule her decisions, and in doing so, had allowed her father to win yet again.

“Not this time,” Renee said. She turned into a gas station and pulled back onto the street she’d been traveling, heading in the opposite direction back to the hospital.

Ten minutes later, Renee pulled into the hospital’s covered parking garage. She didn’t have a clue as to where to find Alex, but knew of at least one person who could help. She walked past the room labeled triage and spotted Monica coming from behind a curtain.

“Monica,” Renee called.

Monica came out of the room. “Renee—”

Renee grabbed her wrist. “Where’s Alex?”

“He’s with Eli,” Monica answered. “His office is on the fourth floor.”

Renee took off for the elevators. She fidgeted as she watched the numbers illuminate one by one above the door. It dinged at the fourth floor, and Renee ran to the large nurses’ station that sat in the middle of the massive space.

“Can you point me to Dr. Elijah Holmes’s office?” she asked the woman behind the desk.

“I’m not sure he’s here,” the nurse said. “Dr. Holmes’s shift ended a half hour ago.”

“His wife said he’s still here.”

“His office is down the hall and to the right. Room 426.”

“Thank you,” Renee threw over her shoulder as she headed in the direction the nurse had pointed. She turned the corner, and nearly ran into Eli’s chest.

“Whoa, hold up there.”

“Eli, is he in your office?” She gestured down the hall.

Eli shook his head. “Probably in Jasmine’s room. They decided to keep her overnight for observation. It’s not unusual with a head injury. I’m headed up to Pediatrics right now.” He took her hand and they walked to the elevators. As soon as the doors closed, Eli turned to her. “You know the whole story?” he asked.

Renee nodded. “Eli, how is he?”

The doors opened to the sixth floor. Eli held it open and gestured for her to go ahead of him.

“Heartbroken,” he finally answered.

Her own heart constricted even more. She followed Eli
into the room that was divided by smaller rooms with glass walls. J
ASMINE
H
OLMES
was printed in bold letters in the slot next to the fifth door on the right.

Renee entered the room after Eli, but when she walked in, the only other occupant was a sleeping Jasmine, a square gauze bandage taped to the left side of her head.

Renee’s chest tightened as she watched Eli lean over his niece and whisper, “Hey, Sunflower,” before placing a kiss on Jasmine’s forehead. This child was so loved.

The door creaked opened, but it was only a nurse.

“Hello, Dr. Holmes,” she said. She nodded at Renee.

“Hey there, Cheryl,” Eli returned. “Have you seen my brother?”

“The chapel,” the nurse answered. She read one of the machines and made a note on the clipboard that hung on the bottom rail of Jasmine’s bed, then left the room.

“It’s on the bottom floor,” Eli said. “Take a left once you get off the elevators.”

Without another word, Renee left the room. She wasn’t sure what reception she would get from Alex when she encountered him. She’d left him at the precise time that he’d needed her the most. She wouldn’t be surprised if Alex refused to speak to her. It would be no less than she deserved.

When she arrived at the bottom floor, she debated turning right, toward the hospital entrance.

Stop being a coward
, she told herself. Whatever Alex’s reaction, she would accept it, and they would move on, but she would help him get through this whether he wanted her to or not.

The door to the chapel was closed. Renee laid hands on the smooth wood and pushed. The room was small. It held about a dozen folding chairs, arranged in two rows of three on each side of an aisle.

Alex sat facing the tiny altar, his elbows on his thighs, face in his hands. His broad shoulders heaved, and his back
shook. Renee covered her mouth, her heart breaking as she watched the silent sobs that racked his body.

She walked over and put a hand on his shoulder. He jerked up, his body instantly stiffening. He looked up at her with reddened, tear soaked eyes.

The ache in her chest was almost more than she could bear. The pain coming through Alex’s eyes was so profound, it touched the very depths of her soul.

Renee crossed her leg over his and lowered herself onto his lap. She wrapped her arms around him, and buried her face in the crook of Alex’s neck, fitting perfectly in the hollow between his jaw and shoulder. After a moment’s hesitation, Alex’s arms circled her, his uneven breathing making his chest rise and fall.

She wanted to reassure him that everything would be okay, but it was an assurance she could not guarantee. There were too many unknowns, the span of uncertainty so vast she could hardly wrap her head around it. The only thing Renee was sure of was her vow to remain by his side through whatever he faced.

Cocooned in his embrace, she offered the only gift she could, the silent promise that she would never leave him again.

Locking her arms around him, Renee swallowed her own sobs as Alex cried in her arms.

Alex didn’t know how much time had passed. He only knew he wasn’t ready to leave. He wasn’t ready to cope with the world outside the walls of this tiny chapel. A world where his daughter had been conceived by another man.

Pain and disbelief slammed through him once again.

He couldn’t stay hidden in this chapel, despite his body’s insistence to remain wrapped in Renee’s soothing embrace.

“Renee?” Alex whispered in her ear.

“I’m here,” she said.

“I know. Thank you,” he answered.

She lifted her head, the streaks down her cheeks somehow adding to her beauty; maybe because they had been shed for him?

“I’m sorry I left,” she said.

Alex shook his head. “You’re not the one who’s supposed to apologize.”

“Yes, I am,” Renee countered. “I won’t do that again,” she said.

“Those are supposed to be my words.” He ran a hand down her back. “I’m sorry for what happened outside. I’ve never lost it like that before.”

“Who could blame you, Alex? After everything you’ve been through in the last few hours? Who could blame you for wanting to beat up the entire world?”

“I never would have touched you,” he said, needing her to know that. “I may have smashed every car window in the parking lot, and punched every wall within striking distance, but I would never raise my hand to you or any other woman.”

“I know,” she reassured him. “I knew it seconds after I left.” She ran her hands up and down his arms. “The memories just bombarded me. In that instant, all I could see was my father’s fist coming toward me.”

Alex shut his eyes, a sick feeling gripping his stomach at the thought of her facing those memories once again. “I am
so
sorry for scaring you, baby.”

Renee leaned forward and rested her forehead on his. “It’s over,” she whispered.

Alex’s chest tightened. He was humbled and overwhelmed by her swift forgiveness.

“What are you going to do?” Renee asked. She was talking about Jasmine. The question had entered his mind, but the thought had been fleeting, because Alex knew there was only one thing he could do.

He took a deep, lung cleansing breath. “I’m going to sit by Jazzy’s bed and hold her hand,” he answered. “When she
wakes up, I’m going to tell her how much I love her, and that she’s a princess. Same as always.”

Alex wiped the tear that ran down Renee’s cheek.

“She’s my little girl,” he said. “She will always be my little girl. I don’t care about the man who fathered her. God created her for me. From the minute she was born, I knew my sole purpose in life was to love that little girl. No blood test is going to change that.”

“She is so lucky to have you for a father, Alex.” It wasn’t the first time Renee had uttered those words to him.

“I’m just as lucky to have her as a daughter,” Alex said. He cradled Renee’s cheeks in his palms and pressed a delicate kiss to her trembling lips. “I’m lucky to have you as the woman I love, too,” he said.

Tears ran down her cheeks in earnest. Alex used his thumbs to wipe them away, but the trail continued to flow.

“Alex, I love you so much,” Renee choked on a sob.

He couldn’t contain his smile. “I told Jasmine she could be there when I asked you to marry me.”

“Then let’s go to her room,” Renee said. “Right now.”

“Does that mean I’ll get a yes?”

“Oh yes,” she said, holding his face in her hands and placing another kiss on his lips. “I’m dying to say yes to you.”