Return of the Jerk (Sweet Life in Seattle, Book 2) (21 page)

Before she knows it, Road’s strong arms are wrapped around her, and she’s completely enclosed. Her head is pressed against his shoulder as she continues to cry.

He’s murmuring something, but Blair is too miserable to pay attention. One of his hands strokes her back, and all she can think is,
I’ve lost her.

After a little while, she starts to quiet down, though she stays in his arms, her own wrapped around his waist. She pulls back and looks up at him.

“Guess that car means something to both of us,” he says softly.

Blair nods, sniffing, still trying to pull herself together. “Yes,” she whispers.

He tilts his head to the side a little, considering her. His hand comes up to her cheek, and she feels him gently wipe away some of her tears with his thumb. It’s a sweet gesture, but then he does something surprising.

Road puts his thumb to his lips, tasting her tears.

Blair’s breath stops at the sight. Stunned. She stares at his mouth, the same mouth she’s stared at a million times with wanting.

His expression is intent, laser focus turned on. He pulls the thumb away from his lips and brings it back to her face, slides his fingers into her hair, holding her head still.

Road’s eyes drop to her mouth, and she knows exactly what he’s going to do. Blair is almost dizzy. She’s imagined this moment so many times that it’s like it isn’t even real. A hazy mirage. An unattainable place she’s always dreamed of traveling to, but never thought she would.

He bends toward her and the mirage becomes solid at long last as Road leans in and kisses her.

She’s too stunned to respond, to even breathe. His mouth is so tender on hers.

The kiss stays soft at first, but then his lips move and Blair opens her mouth to his with a breathy whimper. He seems to like this because his kiss grows stronger, deeper. Their tongues explore each other as his hand continues to hold her head still for him.

Without thinking, Blair’s arms move up and slide around his neck, pulling him closer. A storm of desire crashes through her and she knows she should pull back, shouldn’t let herself go all in, but the rest of the world has ceased to exist. The taste of Road, so exquisite. Clean and unvarnished. This kiss is the most erotic experience of her life.

Until she remembers why he’s kissing her. Why she’s crying to begin with.

Isadora.

In a daze, Blair draws away from him.

Road’s mouth is open slightly and she can still taste his breath, so close, intoxicating, like every lovesick dream she’s ever had. Road’s hand moves deeper into her hair, his other hand on her ass. He’s resisting her attempts to pull away.

It occurs to her that he doesn’t want to stop. He wants to keep going, and why shouldn’t she, too? She’s finally getting what she wants—Road. Her desire for him knows no bottom. But then something else occurs to her and her heart sinks because she realizes they don’t want the same thing. Not at all. He can’t give her what she really wants, and being with him will only hurt her more.

Blair sighs in disbelief at the crazy decision she’s about to make, but like a junkie finally facing her addiction head-on, she knows what she has to do.

If I’m ever going to get over him, I have to have the strength to start somewhere.

Nathan senses it. The moment Blair stops responding to him, her body stiffening.

He’s confused by it because a moment ago, he could tell she was one hundred percent into it. She wanted him. So, why the sudden change?

At first, he doesn’t want to let her pull away, wants to keep tasting her because she tastes good. So sweet. Her elegant curves fit into him just right. Once again, he wishes he remembered more from that night they had. He’s been thinking about it all day, trying to remember.
Can’t even remember what her breasts look like.
He imagines they’re as pretty as the rest of her, though.

Blair breaks their kiss. His hand is on her ass and he’s wondering if there’s some way to convince her this is a good idea. Part of him knows it’s a bad idea, but the part of him touching her ass isn’t agreeing.

“I’m sorry,” she says, not looking at his face. She lets out her breath. “I can’t be with you. Not like this.”

Nathan thinks back to last night and how she was so drunk she’d actually offered herself in exchange for Isadora. Crazy. But then he remembers all the rest of it, too. Her telling him he was the worst lover she ever had.

“Why?” he asks, curious.

Blair doesn’t give anything away, though. It occurs to him that, in some ways, she’s as taciturn as he is, and maybe he’s misinterpreted some of her shyness in the past.

He wonders if it’s because she thinks he’ll be a disappointment in the sack again.

Christ, it’s hard to believe that’s what she thinks of me.

Those pretty hazel eyes are looking at him now. Even her brows have an elegant arch to them and he moves his hand up, running his thumb over the left one.

Her eyes drift shut at his touch. He wants to kiss her again, and so he does. He runs his tongue along the seam of her mouth, hearing her intake of breath. But she opens to him, letting him inside. They kiss some more, and Nathan wants her. Wishes he didn’t, but he does. He feels himself go even harder, trying to forget why this is a bad idea, and trying instead to figure out the logistics on how to make it work.

Blair breaks the kiss this time, too. Turns her head to the side and appears to be struggling with something.

“You okay?”

She doesn’t reply, and he wishes he knew what was going through her head.

There’s something about Blair that keeps pulling at him, despite everything. She’s uptight, but he’s beginning to see there’s more to it. All her lists and tidy ways, always trying to smooth out the rough corners of life, trying to make things better. He saw her doing it at his mom’s house the other night. Rearranging all the food so it was easier for people to get at, cleaning up the selfish mess others had made.

She’s thoughtful in a way few people notice. Not just a good girl, he realizes, but a good woman.

He thinks about that dude who came here earlier. Right away, Nathan saw he was exactly the type Blair should be with. Clean-cut. Straight as an arrow. The kind who wears a suit to work every day and doesn’t have a single relative who’s ever been in rehab or prison.

Shouldn’t have chased him off.

Nathan knew it was a dick move. He was being an asshole, but couldn’t stop himself. He has no claim to Blair, none at all, but for some reason, it bothered him seeing her with that guy. Though he has to say, the dude split way too fast.
Must be dumb as a stump
. If that guy was into Blair, he should have listened to her, given her a chance to explain things.
So, maybe I did her a favor.

He knows that’s bullshit, though.
Shouldn’t have done it.

He felt bad laying down the law about his car with her, too. Hated the hurt expression on her face, those tears. Blair crying like a tragic beauty over Isadora. What a terrible sight.

It had to be done, though.

Uncle Lance is the closest thing to a father he’s ever had, and Isadora was an extraordinary gift. No one’s ever given him a gift like that. Not ever. That car is not something he can sell or part with and unfortunately, no amount of tears can change it.

Blair slips her arms out from around his neck. “I need to go to sleep,” she says. “I keep baker’s hours.”

Nathan nods, part of him wishing there was something he could say to change her mind, though he knows he shouldn’t want it to begin with. “Guess I’ll get some work done.” He needs to check his site stats, make sure everything is running smoothly, and sort through the email from James, his assistant. Needs to get some work done on his book, too.

And then she turns away and leaves. He’s standing in the kitchen alone.

He sighs to himself, reaches for the laptop on the counter, and heads into the office he set up. Right away, he sees something missing.
What the hell?

“Where the hell is my computer?” Road is standing in her bedroom doorway, frowning.

“Uh . . .” Blair’s hands fidget with the night clothes she was ready to change into.

He watches her, looking more mystified than angry, though she suspects this might change.

“I have it.”

“Where?”

Blair gives him a sheepish smile, puts her pajamas down and goes over to her underwear drawer. She can feel Road’s eyes on her as she shifts stuff aside. She pulls out his computer, notices Isadora’s title in there, too, but realizes she can’t let him see that.

He’ll know I went through his stuff. I’ll have to sneak in there and put the title back when he’s not around.

“Here you go,” she says, handing him the computer.

He takes it from her, then motions with his head over to where she’d hidden it. “What’s in that drawer?”

Blair pauses. “My underwear.”

Road’s brows go up and he grins. “You hid my computer with your panties?”

Her face grows warm.

He chuckles, but doesn’t seem bothered. “Damn, babe,” is all he says.

It occurs to her that he’s probably dealt with plenty of over-the-top Skank Factor X antics over the years, and this is tame by comparison.

“I’m sorry,” she says. “I was angry.”

He nods, a grin still tugging at his mouth. “Guess I know where to look next time you get angry.”

Blair ran her fingers across Road’s chest, over his Metallica T-shirt. His body was solid, but she already knew that from all the times she’d observed him shirtless. As a teenager, it was after football games or in his yard at home, and as an adult, it was when he occasionally helped his mom by mowing her lawn. Twice, she’d been lucky enough to be there when he was out front, cursing and fighting with their worn-out lawn mower. She’d spied on him discreetly through the living room window, though it had never fooled Tori. “Stop ogling my brother. It’s grossing me out.” Understandably, Tori never wanted to know too many details about Blair’s passion
.

“What are you doing?” Road asked in a lazy drawl, as Blair’s fingers continued to trail over the letters for Metallica.

Her eyes flashed to his face and she could see he was watching her, but in a mellow drunken sort of way.

“I’m touching you,” she said softly.

He nodded slowly and closed his eyes. “Feels nice.”

She smiled to herself and continued stroking, wondered who was getting more out of this, certain it was her.

Eventually, she changed position. Road’s eyes opened and he took another swallow from the bottle, offering it to her. She took it from him, but instead of drinking, she placed it on the coffee table.

Road watched her in silence.

And when she leaned over and whispered, “I want to kiss you,” he stayed silent then, too. His eyes drifted down to her mouth and lower to her body, but that was all.

Excitement drummed through her. Working her nerve up, Blair moved closer. He was still watching her, and she assumed this meant he was willing. Finally, she made her move and leaning in close, she put her mouth to his.

I’m kissing Road!