Risking Ruin (20 page)

Chapter Thirty-four

On Monday morning Marisa called in sick to work.  She couldn’t remember the last time she’d missed work to mope.   A long run and a good binge of Bravo hadn’t cured her blues by Sunday afternoon.  Around ten o’clock she checked her emails.  Five new ones since yesterday from [email protected].  Her phone rang.  Marisa sighed with relief that it was her office calling.  She’d screened about fifteen calls from Trip in the past forty-eight hours and was in no mood to see his name and number flash on her screen again.

“Hello,” she said, trying to get herself together as she stood up from her bed.

“Marisa,” huffed Jane.  “Are you well enough to come in?”

“No, I’m not feeling great.  Is there an emergency?”

“Trip Brannon has called six times this morning and says he needs to speak with you.  He says it’s urgent.”

“Send him to Stacy.  She’s done some work with Branco and will be able to handle anything he needs.”

“I tried that.  I offered Stacy, Rod, and Stephen, who are all in.  He says that he has to speak with you, not any other lawyer, as soon as you’re available.”

Fuck him for dragging my secretary and law firm into this.  This is personal. He has no right.  Zero right to involve my secretary.
  Marisa’s indignation grew and fire filled her belly.
   I was perfectly clear. He needs to drop this.

“I will call him.  Thanks for letting me know.”

Marisa set down her phone, put on her game face, and dialed Trip’s office line. 
Like hell I’m calling his cell.   This is no longer personal.  This is business.

“Trip Brannon.”

“Trip, it’s Marisa.  I understand you’ve been calling my office this morning.”

“One moment please.   I need to close my office door.”  Marisa paced around her living room, trying to anticipate and plan the hundreds of ways this conversation could go.  “Okay, I’m back. Are you okay?  What happened?  Why did you leave like that?”

“You have to ask me?  Really?  There is girl stuff all over
your
bathroom and you ask
me
what is wrong?  I don’t cheat.  That is not me and I’m done with whatever this was.”

“Marisa, sweetheart, you don’t understand. . . “

“
I’m
the one not understanding?  No, Trip. 
You’re
the one not understanding.  I’m not seeing you again.  I don’t want crap in my life.   We will work together, but that’s it.”

“Please, Marisa, please.  Just listen.”

“No.  You need to hear me.   I’ll be in touch when we hear from Vanessa and about any other matters I’m handling for Branco.  I’m hanging up now,” said Marisa, as she hit end.  She emailed Jane. 
All is well.  He just had some questions about a matter that I’ve been handling.  Under control.  I’ll be back in the office in the office tomorrow.

Marisa flopped back on her bed and stared at the floral papered ceiling.  She was tired. 
He’s a shithead. 
She dialed Erica’s mobile. 
Crap.  Voicemail.
  “Erica, I can’t even talk about it right now, but I’d love to see you, if you’ve got time.”  Marisa closed her eyes and her phone chimed with a text message.  She looked at the screen. 
I’m sorry, but you’re wrong. You are the only one in my life.
   Marisa switched her phone off, laid it on the bedside table, and got dressed for a run.

Marisa beat herself into a stupor.  She wasn’t sure how far she’d run or how long she’d run.  It didn’t matter.  She focused on her breathing and moving, placing one foot quickly in front of the other until her brain could only process her exhaustion and physical pain, leaving the confusion and anger and sadness behind her.  Near the zoo Marisa could run no further and walked toward home
. 
She arrived at her building hours after she had left.  She made her way through the building’s doors and towards the elevator.  The doorman in his navy blazer and white shirt looked relieved. 

“Miss Tanner, I’m glad you’re okay.”

“Why wouldn’t I be okay?  I was just out for a long run.”

“Well, a couple folks have stopped by for you. Both insisted you were in, but not answering your phone or the door.”

Marisa froze in her tracks.  “Who stopped by, Thomas?”

“Well, your friend, the one with the curly dark hair,” Thomas fumbled on his desk and picked up a piece of scrap paper.  “Erica.  She told me to ask you to call her when I saw you next.”

“I’ll do that.  I hope I didn’t worry her.  Who else?”  Marisa had more than a suspicion that Trip was the other unexpected visitor.  Thomas’s eyes shifted toward the small sitting area in the corner of the lobby.

“Me,” said Trip, standing from the chair and rising to his full height.

Marisa’s face turned to stone. 
Didn’t he listen to a word I said? 
She spun on her heel away from Trip. The running shoes let off a loud squeak on the tiled lobby floor.  Without a word, Marisa moved toward the elevator.  She felt Trip close behind her.  She knew that if she looked at him, she’d start crying. 
He doesn’t deserve my tears.  He’s not worth crying over.
  The elevator doors opened and Marisa stepped inside.  Trip followed her into the elevator and stood a respectful distance from her.  As the elevator ascended, neither one spoke.  The ding at the arrival on Marisa’s floor broke the harsh silence. Marisa marched out to her door with Trip on her heels like a puppy following its master in hopes of a tasty treat.

She unlocked her door and paused before opening it. Trip crowded behind her.  She could feel his body’s presence inches from hers. 

Without moving her eyes from the doorframe she calmly announced, “You can come in. I’m going to clean up.  I expect you to leave very shortly and, for God’s sake, I need you to give me some freaking room.  Back up.”

Trip took two steps back and let out a large puff of breath.  Marisa could feel the air swirl around her sweaty skin and it sent tingles down her spine.  She pushed the feeling out of her mind, opened her door, and walked toward her bedroom without a backwards glance.  

Marisa stayed in the shower until the hot water ran out.  She didn’t want to argue with him.  She also wasn’t sure she had the energy to deal with him, but she knew she’d have to come out eventually.  She combed out her hair, but didn’t blow it dry. 
I’m not trying for this guy.
 
He doesn’t deserve it.
  Marisa slipped into a blue and white polka dot short-sleeved blouse and a pair of dark skinny jeans, making sure that absolutely no more skin than necessary was exposed.   She grabbed the handle to her bedroom door, took a deep breath, and walked out.

Chapter Thirty-five

When Marisa walked into the living room, Trip rose from the sofa.  He looked at her with big soft blue eyes and she immediately knew he was going to apologize.  “I made a post-run snack for you,” he said gesturing to the dining room table.  Marisa’s eyes followed his hand to a PowerAde Zero and a simple sandwich.  Marisa’s stomach rumbled.  “You need to get some fuel in you,” said Trip, urging her to sit.   Marisa sat at the table and picked up the sandwich. 
Peanut butter with banana?  How did he know?
  She downed the sandwich and PowerAde without comment.  Trip sat across the table from her. 
Good, he’s keeping his distance. 

After wiping her mouth with her napkin, Marisa took a breath and started.  “Thanks for the snack.  I needed that.”

“You’re welcome.  I’m sorry.”

Marisa stood up from the table and began walking to the front door.   “Thank you for apologizing.  I’m just fine.  I’ll see you next week.”

Trip did not move a muscle.  “I’m not leaving, Marisa.  I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life but this is not going to be one of them.   So, you want to know why there was eye cream or whatever the hell it was in my bathroom?  Well, because a woman left it there.” 

Marisa’s stomach turned into a knot. 
Well, at least he’s being honest unlike Paul who just decided to fuck that bartender behind my back.
 

“I told you I was seeing Amelia last year.  So, don’t freak out on me that there might be some stuff of hers in the bathroom.  I don’t really take care of the house.  I hadn’t noticed the stuff and I guess Ophelia either didn’t notice it or didn’t get rid of it.  Either way, that’s a long time ago.” 

Great, now I look like a crazy person.

“I’m just going to lay all of my cards on the table and ask you to listen.  Just listen to me and if you only want to have a professional relationship going forward, then I’ll deal with it.  Okay?” 

Marisa gave Trip a quick nod, but remained mute.

“Thank you.   I think about you all of the time, Marisa.  I told you that I stopped seeing Amelia last fall.  And that is absolutely the truth.  What I didn’t tell you is that I was very close to asking her to marry me.  She’s nice, but she doesn’t make me laugh and we don’t have anything in common.  But I was thirty-six, so I decided I needed to settle.  I’m emphasizing settle.  I even went ring shopping.” 

Marisa’s stared at her hands, which were folded on the table in front of her.
 
She knew that if she looked at him, she would cry.

“I told my parents I was going to ask Amelia to marry me after dinner one night.  My dad was fine with it.  Something about how she’d make a fine wife and mother.  My mom kicked my dad out of the living room and made me sit down on the sofa next to her.  She wanted to know why I wanted to marry Amelia.  I told her that I was getting older, that Amelia came from a nice family, that we could have holidays with the Duquettes and certainly she’d like that, and that I wanted to be able to give her grandchildren.

“Then my mom started crying.  She asked if I was doing this for her.  I denied it, but she knew.  She told me that she didn’t want me settling for anything less than a woman who made my heart sing.  My mom knows me better than myself sometimes and I think she knew that my heart just wasn’t in it.  She said I was the most precious thing in her life and she doesn’t want me for one minute to be unhappy or to spend the rest of my life with someone who I don’t truly love.  I’ll admit that seeing her like that and her saying those things to me, I started crying, too.  I just want to make her happy and she assured me that the only way to really make her happy was for me to be happy myself.   She asked me if I thought about Amelia all the time. She asked if Amelia made me happy.  She asked if Amelia made me laugh.  She asked if I loved her.  I could only shake my head to all of her questions.  She had nodded and told me that when I meet someone I can’t get out of my head and can’t stay away from, then I need to be an absolute angel to that girl because that is the girl she wants for a daughter.

“I went back to the house that night and Amelia was there.  As you’ve figured out, she’d pretty much moved in around Labor Day.  Listen, I never asked her to move in.  It just kind of happened slowly and I never pushed back.  I thought this was just how things were going to be.  Anyway, if you want details you can have them, but I ended it.  It wasn’t pretty.  There was a lot of crying and anger and then she marched upstairs.  I thought she was getting her clothes and things.  She came back downstairs with a couple of bags and threw a box at me.  So, you’re not the first woman to throw something at me in a fit of rage, Marisa,” said Trip, trying to interject some lightness in the conversation. 

Except it failed. Marisa remained a statue, eyes down on her hands. 

“It was the box with the ring I’d bought for her.  I’d kept it my study, so I’m not sure why she was in there digging through my desk drawers, but she’d found it.  She kept crying hysterically, called me names, and eventually I just called George and asked him to help her get home.  It was one of the worst nights of my life, Marisa.  Until the PI caught her at that support group meeting, I didn’t think Amelia was a bad person.  Hell, I didn’t even think she was very smart.  And she’s never been you.

“You’re who I thought about when my mom asked me about whether I thought about Amelia all the time.  I didn’t think about Amelia.  I thought about you all the time, but in some screwed up fantasy way.  You were this really pretty and determined woman who ran by my house nearly every day.  It even snowed in January and there you were running by.  I think you even had on hiking boots or something because it was really slick out.   Anyway, I didn’t know you and wasn’t sure how to meet you without coming across as a stalker, so I just let you be my unknowing breakfast companion.

“Then, when I took over John’s role, he was getting me up to speed on the pending litigation, the legal side of the business transactions and tax issues, and going over all of the firms the company uses.  He really said wonderful things about you and your firm, Marisa.  About how smart you were, how you were determined and creative and how you got great results for us.  He told me that you were one of the very few lawyers that he didn’t mind being stuck with in a windowless conference room for a day.  If that isn’t high praise, I don’t know what is. 

“So, back in my office later, I was pulling up attorney profiles on firm websites to get a little more bio information on folks.  When I pulled yours up, I wasn’t quite sure how to react.  I knew it was you and I really wanted to meet you.  So, I set up a meet and greet with my dad.  I’d booked a table for lunch at company cafeteria for three people. Then, I remembered my mom telling me that I’d better be good to you, so I called Paulette’s and made a reservation for two.  Yes, I completely kicked my dad out of lunch with you.

“You walked in my dad’s office and it was over for me.  You weren’t wearing an engagement or wedding ring.  I had to talk with you and didn’t give a damn about what you said about the law.  With John’s glowing praise, I already knew I was going to keep your firm and I knew you would have the new lawsuit under control, so I just wanted to get some one on one time with you.  I really like you, Marisa.  I always have a good time with you and I’m not talking about sex, or no-sex, either.  So, that’s it.  I’m being completely honest with you.  I really want to give us a try,” he concluded reaching over to enclose her hands in his. 

“What else can I tell you?”

“How did you know I liked peanut butter and banana sandwiches?,” Marisa said in a voice barely above a whisper, but without removing her gaze from her hands.

Trip snorted and turned beet red.  “Well, that’s easy, but also embarrassing,” he said, firmly grasping Marisa’s hands, “but I promised you honesty, so here goes.  I kind of plugged the guys for every detail they could tell me about the triathlon.  Bert said that you were a double-knotter of your shoelaces and ran your ass off to fend someone else from crossing the finish line before you did.  Sid said you had brought some snacks in your bag and shared them while y’all were having beers afterwards and you’d sworn that peanut butter and banana sandwiches were the perfect food for post-run. Have I sufficiently creeped you out now?  I’m the first to admit that I’m chasing you hard and if I’ve crossed into stalker territory, I’m not really
that
sorry.  I don’t like losing.  I like winning, Marisa, and I like you."

They sat in silence for a minute.  Marisa wiggled her hands out from underneath Trip’s and stood.  She looked at him her face a frozen mask.  Trip’s head fell and his broad shoulders slumped.   Another long moment passed.  Marisa walked to stand behind Trip’s chair.  She bent down near his ear and whispered.  “Sid was wrong.  Peanut butter and banana sandwiches are the best anytime you need energy.”

Trip’s head shot up.  He spun around to face Marisa.  “What,” but before he could get another word out of his mouth, Marisa captured his lips with hers and ran her fingers through his fine blonde hair. 

Trip swept Marisa into his chest and held her tight against him.  “Please say this means that we still have a shot.”

Marisa laughed into Trip’s neck.  “Yes.  I’m sorry about before.  If you want details, I’ll give them to you, but let’s just say that I also thought I was about to get engaged and then I came home to find him in bed with someone else.”

“Are you kidding me?  What asshole would do that?  Sucks to be him and I’m happy for his piss-poor judgment.”

“Man, you really know how to woo a girl,” said Marisa. 

“You know what I mean.  Unless, you want me to tell you again.”  Marisa blushed. 
He is just so irresistibly charming.
  “I’ll take that pause for a request.  So, yes, Marisa Tanner, you are quiet lovely.  You take my breath away with your beauty.  You make me laugh.  You’re smart and determined.  You are always on my mind.  I want to be with you all the time. And most of all, you just feel like home to me.”

With that Trip cupped Marisa’s chin and drew their faces together.  As their lips touched, Marisa melted into him. 
I’m head over heels for this guy. When did this happen? 
“Now, let’s get you some real food in you and you can tell me about your long run.  It must have been long.  I’ve been sitting in your damn lobby for three hours.”