Rocky Mountain Haven (12 page)

“No.” The word shot out so fast she surprised herself.

Mom raised a brow. “Okay.”

“I’m not.” Her cheeks heated even more, and she scrambled for what to say to throw her suddenly very attentive mother off the track.

“All right. Relax. If you’re not ready to talk about it, that’s fine. But I was going to remind you that if at some point you get involved with someone and need a few days alone, you give me a call. Grandma has wheels and loves to travel.”

She forced her mouth closed. In spite of the fact her mother was close to the truth, Beth had no desire to confess anything quite yet. “Mom, what do you think I’m doing out in Rocky Mountain House?”

“Hopefully you’re starting to live a little again. Doctor said you could leave the brace off more often, right?”

“What does my brace have to do with…?” Beth bit her lips. She was not going to continue this conversation. She was twenty-nine years old and talking about sex with her mother had stopped when she was sixteen.

Mom rose and grabbed the coffeepot, refilling both their cups. She sat back down and let out a huge sigh. “I know you don’t want to talk about it, but I’m going to talk and you can listen. Honey, you lived with an abusive man for ten years and kept it from us for most of that time. Now that he’s gone, you’ve been making changes I think most women with your history would be afraid to attempt. You’re taking charge of your life and trying to make sure you’ve got nothing but the best happening for your boys.”

Her mom reached over and clasped their hands together. “I applaud your decision to make a fresh start in a small town, even though it means you and the boys are farther away from me. I want to help, okay? I love you, and you deserve to smile again like you used to when you were young. You are one of the strongest people I know, no matter what Samuel used to tell you. You are beautiful and trustworthy and valuable, and I’m very, very proud of you.”

Beth watched with tear-filled eyes as her mom squeezed her fingers then fussed at the table for a moment before sipping from her coffee cup. Silence surrounded them as Beth took her time to process what her mom had shared. The shattered pieces of the past had cut everyone involved, and the lacerations went far and deep.

“You’re proud of me?” She sniffed and wiped her mouth, taking a deep breath to slow her pounding heart.

Her mom nodded. “Very.”

Beth closed her eyes and soaked in the familiar sounds of family. The boys’ laughter, their Grandpa’s deeper boom and the noise of the television mixed together and poured from the room next door in a kind of harmonic soundtrack to her life.

Her world had changed so much from the rose-coloured future she’d imagined as a newlywed. Samuel’s demands rose so slowly that she wasn’t even aware he was abusing her. Controlling her, yes, then making her dread making a mistake. He’d never physically threatened the boys, but they had quickly learned when it was time to stay out of sight and sound of their father.

And when the day came he finally hit her…

Beth stared out the window. There were a few leaves left clinging to the branches. Brown dead things swinging in the breeze. She was tired of being dead.

Daniel made her feel alive.

“Daniel is…” She puffed air, her bangs wiggling. “He’s special.” Beth lifted her gaze to see her mom smiling, the corners of her mouth twisted a tiny bit.

“You seeing him?”

Beth shook her head at first then grudgingly shrugged. “Kind of. He’s been around a fair bit. Supportive, caring, fabulous with the boys.”

“Good looking?”

“Oh, Mom, you want a physical dossier?”

Her mom grinned. “Why yes, yes I would. So if he’s not an instructor at the pool, what’s he do?”

“He’s one of the Coleman boys, from the ranch next door.”

The smile on her mom’s face faded. “Oh.”

Beth frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Mom wiggled her nose. “I see why you said you felt as if you were taking advantage of them.” She took another drink before putting the cup down firmly. “Still, there’s nothing wrong with it. You feel…comfortable around him?”

Beth flushed at the thought of the last time they were together. Comfortable? Oh yeah. She dragged her mind out of the gutter and concentrated on what her mom was really asking.

“I took it slow at first, only seeing him in public, but he’s been nothing but trustworthy. He’s actually very gentle. It’s kind of confusing. Even when Samuel was nice, you know at the beginning, he always added that underlying ‘I’m the man, you’re the woman, my way or the highway’ component to our relationship.”

“Daniel doesn’t do that?”

Beth hesitated. “He’s confident, and a naturally take charge kind of guy, but I never feel as if he’s pushing too hard. It’s like what he wants the most is what I want.”

Her mom made one of those
hmm
type sounds. “Then I’m going to be even nosier and ask. If you feel comfortable around him, are you planning on giving him a real chance? Or is this going to be something that you need more time on?” She shook her finger in Beth’s direction. “Don’t make that face at me. You know what I’m talking about. After all those years fighting, striving to keep your identity when all Samuel wanted to do was make you into the image he wanted to see…it’s got to be hard to know when you can really trust a person.”

Beth lost the logic in that one. “You think I can’t trust him?”

“I didn’t say that. I said maybe
you
think you can’t trust him. Or anyone except yourself, yet. There’s a time coming when you have to expand your radius of trust farther than simply your father and me. I’m not suggesting this man is someone you’re going to be with forever. I don’t know anything about him except what you’ve just told me. Still, you need to think about it. If he does become someone you want around more permanently, you’ll have to show him that you’re ready.”

It was a lot to consider, so all Beth did was nod, then come around the table to give her mom the biggest hug possible.

A soft pat landed on her cheek. “Now, about another matter. We were wondering if you wanted to have Christmas at your place. Then you won’t have to drive the winter roads with your bad leg and the three boys. I worry about you on the highway.”

In one swoop, she was back to being the child and her mom taking care of her. “Mom, it’s only a couple of hours.”

“We’d love to see where you’ve landed. You didn’t want any help getting settled and I can respect that, but for Christmas, we want to come to you.”

They ironed out the details and another small section of the ice in her heart thawed. It would be their first Christmas without Samuel. Having a house full of family and being in a new location would be a good thing.

Chapter Ten

The light tapping on the door made her heart start pounding. Every time she swore she wasn’t going to let it happen and it still did.

Beth opened the door then frowned in confusion.

“Hey, Ms. Danube.”

Instead of Daniel, whom she’d expected, the tenth-grade student who usually babysat for her stood there, backpack slung over one shoulder. The girl slipped into the house and peeled off her bag and jacket, looking around the house in anticipation. “Where’re the boys?”

“They’re upstairs getting their pyjamas on. Sandy, why…?”

“Beth.” The door opened again, and Daniel stepped in, his eyes flashing as he swept a glance over her body that heated her up in an instant. “Sandy’s going to babysit for the evening, if that’s okay. I have something I want to show you.”

Sandy called out from the kitchen. “You want them in bed at the usual time, Ms. D?”

Beth answered without thinking, watching Daniel stalk her across the room. That was the only way to describe what he was doing. He took slow, deliberate steps toward her, his heated gaze melting her defences. Then he was standing right there, inches away from her body.

She yearned to touch him.

“I want to kiss you,” he whispered. “I
need
to kiss you.”

She glanced at the stairs. The boys would be down in only seconds, but if this relationship had any chance of moving on, like her mom had suggested, maybe it was time to see how the boys reacted.

She tilted her head back and leaned in, letting him close the final distance between them so their lips could touch. Light. Gentle, a simple press together that still made her body sing.

They drew apart before anyone arrived. Except the fact she’d initiated the kiss, here where they could get caught—he’d noticed. He beamed at her and stepped back. “Hey, no brace. Doctor say things are fine?”

There were two questions in his voice. “My leg is doing much better. He wants me to use the brace as little as possible. And everything else is good too.” No condoms needed anymore, if that was the other part of what he was asking.

The smile on his face grew. “That’s great about your leg. I bet it will make it easier to get around, but you be sure to let me know if I ever need to help you, okay? Oh, and me too.” He pulled a folded paper from his pocket, displaying the edge.

They stared at each other for a minute. Beth tried to decide if the X-rated thoughts racing through her mind made her evil or if it was a good sign.

“You got a coat?”

She nodded, curious what he was up to. The boys poured down the stairs and surrounded him, shrieks of joy ringing out at his presence.

“Daniel. You going to read to us?”

“Did you see my bruise? It’s huge.”

Beth held on to the back of a chair as Daniel gave complete attention to the trio of wet-headed boys. He knelt down and talked to each in turn, and Beth shook her head to fight off the urge to picture this more permanently. That was too soon and not what she’d asked for.

Her heart didn’t care.

Daniel stood. “Well, guys, that’s all very fascinating, but you know what? I’m not here tonight to see you. I’m stealing your mama away for a bit, so Sandy is going to take care of you.”

Lance narrowed his eyes, and Beth held her breath as she wondered how he’d react. “You going on a date?”

Daniel looked at her, waiting for her to respond. Letting her make the decision of what was said. Three more pairs of eyes stared her direction and she hesitated for a second. Damn it, it wasn’t fair to anyone to hold off on moving forward. She smiled brightly. “Yeah, it’s a date.”

Her littlest one wrinkled up his face. “Mommies don’t date.”

Beth laughed. “It’s a way of saying we’re friends and we want to spend some grown-up time together. Sandy is here to take care of you.”

Nathan tugged on Daniel’s sleeve. “You still going to be our friend and play with us?”

“Of course.”

That was enough for him. Nathan bounced off, dragging Robbie out of Beth’s arms where he’d crawled for a kiss.

Lance exited the room slower, staring over his shoulder, and Beth hesitated. Looked like her oldest son was having the most trouble with the idea, but any conversation with him would have to wait until the morning.

He led her through the trees, rubbing her hand with his fingers where it lay on his arm. The leaves underfoot crackled as they stepped through them, tall grasses lying flat on the ground and the smell of winter coming closer. They walked in silence for the longest time, and Daniel wondered how best to continue their discussion.

Beth tugged lightly on his arm, and he slowed, turning her to face him. The warmth of her body spread, flowing over his limbs and driving into his heart.

“You okay with what I told the boys?” she asked.

He lifted her chin and took her lips under his. She tasted sweet and needy, pressing closer to him like she wanted to weld them into one skin. He’d already decided he had to know where they were headed in the future. Maybe not asking her now, this instant, but soon.

“I told you from the start I wanted to see you for more than just sex. Although there’s some wicked memories running through my brain—”

“Me too.” She grabbed his face in her hands and grinned up at him. “I have no idea how you came up with that shower scheme, but holy smokes. You don’t know how hot the whole situation was for me. How freeing and so much what I needed right then.”

He stared into her eyes, the sincerity and intensity of what she said clear. Still…

“It wasn’t very romantic.” If he could pick her up and carry her to the king-sized bed in her room, he would be in heaven. Cover her with his body and bury himself deep while he watched her face every second.

There were some positive things about sex with a lady flat on her back.

She snickered. “It was totally hot, and I told you before I’ve done romantic and I’ve done slow. What I’m looking for is more. You delivered, totally and completely.”

“Really?”

She slapped his shoulder. “Yes, really. I want to know what you’ve got planned for an encore.”

“Your wish is my desire.” Daniel tilted his head to indicate their direction.

She glanced down the trail in confusion. “Sex outdoors? Okay…” Her enthusiasm faded, and he laughed.

“It’s a little chilly for that, don’t you think?”

“I’m game.”

“I think I can figure out something else that’s not vanilla but still warm. Come on.” He tucked her under his arm and kissed her temple before guiding her through the trees.

They broke into the open just past the barns and outbuildings, close to where the heavy equipment was lined up neatly for the night. He sensed Beth’s confusion as they continued to walk, as he guided her over the rough sections of trail to where the small guest cabin sat behind the main house. He opened the door and led her in.

“This is where Jaxi lives, isn’t it?”

“Jaxi and Blake, but they’re on their honeymoon. They’ll be home next weekend. I cleaned it out a little and we’re good. They won’t mind at all.”

Beth raised an eye at him. “There’s a bed in here.”

“Don’t hold it against me.”

“Don’t hold me against it…”

He laughed. Damn, he loved her sense of humour. “I told you, I have a million things I want to do with you. It’s warm and cozy and private here. You ready to play?”

Her grin lit up the room.