Authors: Sabrina Riley
Chapter 5
Nicole
It was becoming clear to me that it was going to be harder living with the guys than I had thought. After everything going on, I just stuck to myself. I met a few new friends at the beach and spent most of my time there. I left before the guys were up and I didn’t have to see Rocco half dressed in the kitchen again. He was bad news and though my body didn’t know any better, I did. There was no way that I needed to get involved with a guy like that.
School started and I finally found a job bussing tables at a small seafood restaurant at the Marina. It was decent money and they gave me a flexible schedule, so everything was going as it was supposed to. It was almost too perfect and it made me worry that something was going to go wrong. It always did, but after a few weeks, my new life was as close to paradise as I could make it. Living with Carl and Rocco wasn’t so bad. They were really nice, maybe a little too nice, but for a couple of jocks, it wasn’t near as bad as I had thought it would be.
“Nicole.”
I looked back in the kitchen and Rocco was in there in the fridge again and it was hard not to laugh. The man ate all day long. I had never lived with men before and it seemed like both of my roommates were constantly in the kitchen. I hadn’t cooked yet and I started to wonder if I should. I may never be able to get out of it again. If they knew I could cook, I may never get out of the kitchen.
I was musing too much and I had to physically shake the thoughts from my head. They didn’t need to know how much I was affected. Rocco in particular could make my mind jelly within minutes it seemed like. There was something about him. “Yeah Rocco?”
“Are you going down to the beach today?”
After class that was pretty much where I went every day unless it was storming out. It would be far too soon that the winter was there and the weather would keep me indoors, so I was taking advantage of the warmth as much as I could. Shaking my head that I was, he asked if he could come with me. “If you want to. I figured that you and Carl would have a party to go to or something.”
The men were so different than I was. It had become clear from the first night at the house, that they liked to party, a lot. The theme hadn’t changed the last couple of weeks that I had been there. The time had been flying, but I wasn’t so unnoticing to not see that. They were the life of the party, while I was content swimming in the ocean at night.
“I mean, I am just going down there to do some snorkeling. I don’t know how much fun it is going to be for you.”
“Getting wet is always a good time for me.”
I ignored his cheesy pun and the way he undressed me with his eyes. I was used to it by now, but it still affected me more than I liked. “Well you are more than welcome to come. I usually just walk down there. It is not too far. Do you need time to get dressed?”
“Nope, I have shorts on so I am good.”
I didn’t mention that the khaki was going to go see through so I hoped he had something else on. I wasn’t going to say anything, wondering more than once if the steroid look had ruined other parts of his anatomy. There was always a bit of a bulge in the morning, but never enough for me to know. And I was the kind of girl that was curious. He may be a heartbreaker and a mess, but Rocco was damn sure pretty to look at.
“Okay, well why don’t we invite Carl?” I started towards the man’s room in the back and he stopped me.
“No, he had a good night last night and won’t be up for a while. Why don’t we leave him to sleep?”
I just nodded. I was starting to wonder if he just wanted me alone again. Rocco was a lady’s man. It was clear with all of the girls that hung all over him at school. But I wasn’t going to be one of them and his little antics wouldn’t help. I was sure that I wouldn’t succumb to the man, but when I looked into his dark eyes, I knew that he thought he already had me.
“It’s up to you. I don’t care either way. I am surprised either one of you can walk with all of the partying you do.”
“It’s what school is for. Trying new things and seeing what happens.”
I had a feeling that he was one of the new things that I was supposed to try. The man was tempting, I would give him that, but I wasn’t strong enough for another heart break and Rocco was the kind of guy that a girl could fall for. The question was if he could fall too and I doubted it. Why would he when he had every other girl at his disposal? I knew I didn’t have a chance beyond a night and that wasn’t enough for me. I wanted more than just a roll in the hay.
“Okay. I was just going to check on some of the sea life around here. Have you ever gone snorkeling before?”
He shook his head that he hadn’t and it didn’t surprise me. If I had grown up there, you couldn’t have gotten me out of the sea, but the natives took it for granted in a way. “Well I have some extra equipment. Let me go get it.”
Rocco nodded and the followed me into my room. I was very aware of his presence and his eyes on the messy room that I hadn’t picked up the day before. His eyes landed on a bra that was on the dresser and I felt my face growing hot from embarrassment. “Sorry. I should have picked up this morning.”
He just waved me off, watching me pick up the undergarment causing me discomfort. He liked having me disconcerted and I would have stopped if it wasn’t so easy to be bothered by him.
“It’s okay. I never clean mine.”
“Then who cleans up around here?”
“Carl’s girlfriend.”
“Do you have a girlfriend?”
He shook his head. He had many girlfriends, but apparently he didn’t count them. He asked if I was seeing anyone, but I think we both knew that I wasn’t. They knew everything about me from living together and whether they could see it or not, the dry spell was driving me crazy.
“No, I don’t have time for boyfriends. The classwork is harder than I expected.”
“You know what they say about too much work and no play.”
“Yeah, I may actually graduate. I don’t know how you guys do it. I would be useless with all of the partying you do.” It was clear he was smart though. Rocco had a little of everything and it was hard not to see that. I say what every other girl saw in him. The man had a lot to offer someone, but he was more worried about quantity than quality.
“I always make time for pleasure.”
I shivered with his words and the look in his eyes. He was suddenly too close and I took a step back from him. Grabbing up the masks and extra flippers, I didn’t look back at his dark needy eyes. He knew exactly what he was doing and though I knew that, I still wished that he had given me a kiss. His lips had been so close and looked so soft. But then it was over and I was left breathing a little heavier than usual.
Chapter 6
Nicole
Something I had learned about Rocco was that he was a charmer when he wanted to be. We spent most of the day together and he was rather adept at using the mask. He helped me get some starfish to the surface to look at their colors and though I doubted he could have cared less about any of it, he at least pretended to care for my benefit and it was hard not to be pleased with him.
The shorts had gone see through and paired with no shirt, it was hard to breathe around him. Rocco didn’t seem to try much more to seduce me and I was torn on it. While I had told myself that his gaze was bothersome, it was even more so with the absence of it.
At the end of the day, I felt differently about Rocco. He wasn’t just the dumb jock that I thought he was. There was more to him than what met the eye and I was starting to feel myself having feelings for him. It was what I had feared and now he was the one that didn’t seem interested. Aggravated I went into my room and made a call to Annie. I wished she was there with me. She always knew just what to say.
“I don’t know what you are even talking about Nicole. You were the one that told me he was just a jock. You know, the kind of guy that you hate? Full of himself and thinking he is God’s gift to women.”
“I know. You are right.” But I wondered then if he actually had been sent down for all of womankind. I smiled to myself and listened to my friend telling me all of the right things. She was telling me the same thing that my head was telling me, but I didn’t want to hear it.
“Nicole?”
“What?”
“You aren’t even listening to me, are you?”
I told her that I was. I just had a lot on my mind. I didn’t want to talk about me anymore and I asked her how her classes were going. Thankfully that got her started on her own dilemma and then she dropped a bombshell that I wasn’t prepared for.
“So I went out with this girl last week.”
“Wait, what?”
“Come on Nicole. We both know that I was in love with you for the last couple of years we stayed together. I know now that you just weren’t interested, but it also made me realize that I am just not that into guys.”
I nodded to no one else in the room. I had always known, but I felt happy for her for finally accepting it. She came from a good family, one that would not understand the way she felt and if they did understand, they would not understand why she couldn’t just pretend for the rest of the world like they did.
“I am so happy for you Annie. You deserve to be happy.”
“Thanks Nikki. I didn’t know if I was ever going to get over you.”
“You seemed to have done so pretty quickly.” I stopped, wondering why I felt a weird feeling over her getting over me. I didn’t want her for more than a friend, but I didn’t want to lose her as that. The distance was further away and it also made me realize that I wasn’t fitting in as well as I would have liked. I certainly hadn’t gone on any dates. With the two roommates that I had, it was hard to think of another guy.
“Are you jealous?”
“A little. I am not fitting in the same here. I have met a couple of friends, but the guy situation is a mess.”
“Well if you keep drooling after your jock roomie, you are never going to find a guy.”
I knew she was right. I had to stop thinking about Rocco, but there was something that pulled me to him. I started to wonder what would happen if I just went to him, just once. I knew that he didn’t want a relationship, all he wanted was those few minutes of bliss and then he would forget about me. But would I forget about him? That was the real question and I wasn’t sure of the answer.
“I am not drooling at him, but I swear, the guys here are built different. He is so hard and…”
She started laughing a little and I felt my face getting red. It was so unlike me that I couldn’t believe I had fallen into such debauchery. “You’ve got it bad. I want to meet the man that has my friend hyperventilating.”
I denied it, but we both knew that I was wasting my breath. She knew me far too well.”
“Well I am not the one that sounds like she is in love.”
Another chuckle. “No I guess not. You sound like you are in just pure lust. You should go for it Nicole. Get that guy out of your head so you can focus on finding you a good man.”
“Alright, well I got to get off of here. I got work in a little bit until ten.”
“Don’t work too hard Nicole and tell me all about it.”
I said that there would be nothing to tell, but I suddenly wished there was. Why couldn’t I just do as she said? I wanted him and I knew that he wanted me. Why couldn’t it just be that easy? I tried to convince myself that I wouldn’t get attached. And I tried to convince myself that it was all that I needed. All I needed was for him to take me like his eyes promised to just once and I was sure then that I could get him off my mind.
“I don’t think there will be anything to tell you, but if there is, you will be the first to know.”
“You better Nikki. Don’t wait so long to call me next time. It’s been a week and I miss talking to you.”
“I miss you too. I am really happy to hear from you and hear that you finally are being true to yourself.”
“I would drop this girl and take you in a heartbeat. You know that Nicole.”
I paused. She had never really come out and said it before and I wasn’t sure how I felt about it. Annie would always be my friend, but there was no attraction there on my side. “If I was into girls, you would be the first one on my list.”
She giggled a little. “I know Nicole. You never once gave me a look that I thought was anything more than friendship. But I always hoped. Maybe this Rocco jock will break your heart and send you to my side.”
I had to laugh at that. It was the way she thought and no big deal to have my heart broken I suppose. “Well I guess we will have to see. Take care of yourself Annie. I will talk to you soon.”
Hanging up I just shook my head and sighed to no one in particular. I missed her and sometimes I wondered if the small quaint town was worth it. I liked my job and new school, I even didn’t mind the roommates that partied more than they slept. But I missed having someone who knew me like Annie did. I didn’t have to explain things to her like I had to everyone else.
Thinking about what she said, I thought about the man in the other room. I didn’t know what his plans were but I had some plans that involved something I knew I wasn’t supposed to be doing. Why couldn’t I just try and see what happened? Maybe Annie was right and I just needed to seek out the lust that I was feeling for him.
After a time, Rocco was all I could think about and I decided to put something tight and short on to get his attention. I just needed one time, a few moments with the devilishly handsome man and I was sure it would all be better. I just needed to feel that hard body I had been seeing around the house on me, in me, just once.