Authors: Alyssa J. Montgomery
âJust one more thing.' The fancy hairpiece holding her hair up simply had to go. Finding it, he exerted a little pressure on the clip and it opened up to let all her gorgeous wavy red hair spill down her back.
She arched an eyebrow and smiled. âYou wanted me to let my hair down?'
âAll the way, honey.'
Logan's hands were compelled to drift over the softness of Sophie's body while his mouth melded with hers, tongues tangling, lips seeking to give and receive pleasure. His fingers smoothed across her back and down her spine under the thick curtain of her loose hair. He loved her hand-span waist and the flare of her hips. Her silky skin was a stark contrast to his limbs. She was beautifully feminine and curvy, and his arousal ached as her nakedness pressed against it.
Oh, man. His shaft jerked and strained as she increased that pressure and began to rotate her hips, grinding herself against him in the most tantalising torture known to man.
The shift of her warm breasts against his chest as she raised her arms around his neck diverted his attention and ramped up his desire. His lips left hers to trail a pathway of hot kisses along her jaw and down her neck, stopping only once he got to the little area above her collarbone that he'd discovered was hypersensitive and a highly erogenous zone for her.
Arching her back so her head fell backward, Sophie whispered his name like an invocation.
While his thumbs slid under the swell of her breasts and his hands moved to cup her, he dropped his mouth and revelled in the sweetness of one erect nipple. Her breasts were perfect and he filled his mouth with the peak of one and then the other.
âI can't wait, Logan. I want you now.'
âNo. Not yet,' he husked against her breast. He hadn't had nearly enough of her.
He raised his head so he could look into her eyes as he reached and stroked the soft down between her legs. Moving rhythmically, playing with her, parting her delicate folds, his arousal jerked again as he breathed in her intoxicating essence. Her eyes darkened, her pupils dilated and each muscle in her body tautened in response to his stroking.
âLogan!' Her voice was urgent and her nails bit into the skin of his shoulders. âDo you have protection handy?'
She barely gave him time to get the rubber and sheath himself when she used the granite bench top to lift herself up and wrap her legs tightly around him.
âI'm desperate to have you inside me!' she rasped, angling herself for his entry.
âI want to be there.'
Her hand was on him, guiding him to the centre of her need. She was slick and ready and her legs tightened around his body, urging him to thrust forward into paradise, to stretch and fill her and fuse their bodies together so they could resonate as one.
The blood roared through his veins as he gripped her thighs and urged her into a counterpoint rhythm against him. Her internal muscles clenched him and she grabbed his shoulders for support.
âBetter slow down, baby, or this is going to be over real fast.' He was boiling over in his new kitchen.
âNo. Not slower,' she panted. âFaster. I want all of you, hot and out of control.'
His body craved completion, yearned for that intense primal rush that went beyond rational thought.
Sophie whimpered, her head was thrown back and she used her hands against the bench to push her pelvis harder against his. Watching her climax, seeing her caught up so strongly in wonder that she forgot to breathe for several seconds was the most profoundly humbling experience for him. Extreme ecstasy was mirrored in all of her features.
âOh!' she gasped as she shuddered.
Then his world exploded and he felt the heated flow of his ecstasy spilling out of his body as he was set alight with sensation. Nothing had ever been this good.
âWonderful.' The word was a sigh of completion as her limbs went heavy and she pushed against the bench so she sat on it but her body moved forward, and she could drape her arms around his neck once more and snuggle against his chest. âJust awesome.'
It sure had been. Hugging her tightly to him, he inhaled the sweet fragrance of her hair. His frame shuddered as another aftershock of pleasure surged through him. Still joined together in the most fundamental way a man and woman could be, he wanted to stay like this forever, just holding her close and running his fingers through her hair, placing tender kisses at her temple and across her forehead.
âWell, that's the kitchen christened! Which room's next, Mr Jackson?'
âAre you ready for the tour of the master bedroom now?'
âI just might be.' He loved her dimples as she gave him a starry-eyed smile. âDo you think I might stay for a sleepover?'
âMm. That would be great. Just don't bank on much sleep.'
Lifting her up off the bench, her legs still wrapped around his hips, he began walking out of the kitchen. Each step he took while he was still inside her sent up a delicious friction, making him hard all over again.
As they approached the staircase that led up to the bedrooms, Sophie said, âI don't think we're going to make it to the bedroom.'
âHave to, honey. I need another condom. I can assure you I'm healthy, and I'd pretty much guarantee you're clean, but unless you're using some other form of contraceptionâ¦'
The jerk of her body and the sudden stiffness of her limbs was impossible to miss.
Drawing his head back to look down at her, his heart stilled as he saw the pallor of her complexion.
âSophie?'
âI probably can't have children.'
Her bald statement had him tensing.
The arms that had been wrapped around his back drew away and she pushed at his shoulders a little as she eased herself off him, out of his arms, and stood facing him. Her hands crossed defensively over her breasts.
âWow. I've never felt quite so naked,' she said, but didn't look at him.
Her skin went from unnaturally pallid into a flush, her embarrassment palpable.
âCome here, sweetheart.' He swept her up once more, this time cradling her to his chest, one arm around her shoulders, the other under her knees.
His heart shattered as he saw the tears pooling in her eyes, but he walked up the stairs with her, all the way to the master bedroom. He didn't pause, didn't speak until they were both in his bed under the linen, Sophie secure against him â not sobbing, but the tracks of her tears making his chest moist. Every now and then she sniffled.
The advantage of wealth meant his new home was completely ready to move in to. Whoever it was who saw to such matters had placed a box of tissues on the bedside table. He'd noticed all these small details earlier when he'd stashed more condoms in the top drawer of his bedside table.
Passing her a tissue, he said, âWant to talk about it?'
She sat up. After wiping her tears and blowing her nose, she explained. âI had an accident while I was horse-riding. I broke my pelvis and my fallopian tubes were damaged. The doctors have said that even if they harvested eggs from my ovaries, my pelvis may not be able to take the weight of a full-term baby.'
It wasn't often Logan didn't know what to say. She'd never told him the cause of the scars that she'd been embarrassed about the first night they'd been together, and he'd never asked because he didn't want to intrude on her privacy or make her think that they made any difference to him.
Sophie gave a self-conscious laugh and looked away. âMy God. This is awkward.'
He reached out and took her hands in his. âI'm sorry you've been through all of that.'
Sending him a watery smile, she said, âSo you see, I'm not a good candidate to be anybody's wife for real. I'll never be able to give any man sons or daughters.'
Logan frowned. âHaving children isn't important to me.'
âWell, the problem doesn't apply to you, does it? You only want a temporary wife anyway.'
The words stabbed at him and in a split second he found himself re-evaluating his priorities. He still wanted to marry Sophie, but he wasn't sure whether it was a temporary marriage he desired. When he'd said earlier that he could picture her in the kitchen and hear her laughter ringing through the house, he hadn't been kidding. The fantasy of her living here with him didn't seem a transient thing. He could picture them in this house together for the long-term.
âAre you sure you can't have children?' he asked gently.
âI haven't been recently to a specialist, but that's certainly what I was told.'
Medical science was always improving
. He trailed a hand through her hair. âAnd if you could have children, would you want them?'
âYes.' There was no hesitation in her response. âI told you once before that I didn't want any children, but I was lying to myself and to you. There's nothing more I'd rather in the entire world than to have children of my own.'
He shifted his body so they lay side by side and he could look straight into her eyes. âWe're so good together, Sophie. I don't think temporary would be enough. Marry me for the long haul, sweetheart. Be my wife and Charlotte's mother.'
Her intake of breath was audible as she registered and seemed to think over his words. âTaking you up on that would be selfish. I've been an only child, Logan. I would've loved a brother or sister, or both. It would be great for Charlotte to have siblings.'
He shook his head. âIt's more important for Charlotte to have two adults raising her who care about her and each other.'
âDon't you want children of your own?'
Fleetingly he looked away from her. âI've never wanted children.' He swallowed. âI told you I didn't have the happiest of childhoods.'
âBut now that you're going to be a father figure you might reconsider.'
Oh, hell. He lifted his hands, palms up. âGod, Sophie. I haven't thought that far through this. Scott's death, Charlotte needing a guardian â it all happened so quickly, but I haven't reconsidered having children.'
âOf course. You hadn't even considered getting married, had you?'
âNo.'
âBut that changed, and so might your desire to have kids. Iâ¦' She faltered. Her voice broke and she took a huge gulp. âI'm not the woman you need to be your wife.'
He got up out of the bed, confused and restless. Why was she so darned intent on putting up obstacles to their being together? One hand went to the back of his neck, kneading the muscles that were tightening there. Turning back to her, he told her with utter sincerity, âI've never wanted kids, but I do want you.'
Her tears started flowing again. She hung her head and buried her face in her palms, crying in earnest. âDamn you, Logan! I built up all my barriers for a reason. It's not fair that you come storming into my life and start crashing through them. I can't handle being vulnerable and exposed.'
Sitting on the edge of the bed, he drew her against him again and let out a long breath as she wrapped her arms around him and clung tight.
âYou and I are good for each other, Sophie. We've each built up defensive walls and I'm beginning to realise they're not protecting us â they're imprisoning us. You're living in a fortress of your own making the same way I am, and something's telling me that we need each other so we can be free.'
Drawing away from him, she looked up at him, her eyes a sea of watery green. âThat's pretty deep.'
The sound he made was one of self-consciousness. âYou bring out a depth in me I didn't know I had.'
Sophie got up from the bed. âI can't be here with you tonight. I need some space.'
As much as he didn't want to let her go because he wanted to be the one to provide her with comfort when she was feeling so bloody low, he understood she wanted time out to think.
He nodded. âDo me a favour, Sophie?'
She raised one eyebrow in enquiry.
âDon't shut me out.'
Seconds dragged.
Finally she inclined her head in agreement.
âBathroom is through that door,' he told her. âWhy don't you go and wash those tears away while I go downstairs and get your clothes?'
âThanks,' she answered very quietly.
The lines of strain were etched around her mouth and eyes, and it was hell walking away from her, but he knew she was feeling raw and he had to respect her need to pull herself together in her own time and in her own way.
Six o'clock. Just another half hour and Logan would pick her up. Then she could forget all the problems and pressures of her workday and indulge in her fourth successive night of sensual bliss. Her lips curved into a smile of satisfaction. Logan was an incredible lover and she had no regrets. The second night they'd been together, he'd challenged her about how many times he'd made her laugh. There'd been plenty of laughter between them since then, plenty of sexy banter and flirtation and many, many sighs of sensual satisfaction.
Wednesday night something had shifted between them. He'd been serious in his suggestion that they make a go of a real marriage rather than the temporary arrangement he'd first advocated. When she'd confided in him that she couldn't have any children he'd tried to reassure her that it wasn't important to him, and offered her the chance to be a mother to Charlotte, but had also respected her need for distance. He'd phoned the following morning to make sure she was okay, asked her to see him again last night and she'd agreed. She simply hadn't been able to stay away.
The news years ago that she wasn't likely to be able to have children had been a devastating blow. Her coping mechanism had been to throw herself harder into her work for children's charities and to convince herself that being MD of Carlisle Mining was going to bring her all the fulfilment and satisfaction she needed in life. For a while, she'd believed her own spin. Now she'd met Logan, all the convictions she'd tried to instil about what she wanted out of her future were crumbling around her.