She listened as he strummed a few chords of
Maybe Tomorrow
. Like their physical relationship, their musical partnership had disintegrated this past week into nothing but one argument followed by another. The notes, the melodies and harmonies, the words, had stopped coming and, as she lay on the bed staring at the ceiling, she sighed and wondered if he’d bother looking for her if she just stayed in bed all day. She was tired of forcing herself through the motions and she was homesick for her family.
She heard him hit a bad note and cuss, and then she heard the guitar hit the ground and the front door slam.
Great, another perfect day here in paradise.
107
Mari Carr
She rose slowly and threw on her robe. She shuffled out to the living room where Sky’s blanket lay twisted in knots at the end of the couch.
At least he isn’t sleeping any better.
The thought was petty and mean, but she didn’t care.
She walked to the coffeepot in the kitchen and poured herself a cup of the strong brew Sky liked to drink. It was bitter on her tongue, but she needed any jolt of energy she could muster. Carrying her cup back to the couch, she set it beside the electric keyboard they’d set up their first night in the cabin. She turned it on and tapped a few notes.
Soon one of her favorite Billy Joel songs came to her and she started playing the haunting, lonely melody. She closed her eyes and began to sing the words to
And So It
Goes
, the lyrics and music matching her feelings. She’d driven Sky away. She’d given her true feelings away somehow and he’d shut down. She wasn’t surprised by his response—he’d warned her repeatedly he was only interested in casual affairs, but the idea that she’d been such a coward tore at her insides. She’d tried for weeks to pretend nothing had changed for her, tried to convince him—and her—that she could handle the playing, the casual touches, the meaningless kisses. She’d lied to both of them. The song ended and she reached up to wipe away a tear.
“That was beautiful. One of my favorite songs.” Sky’s voice from the doorway startled her. She tried to wipe her nose covertly on the sleeve of her robe. “Me too,” she said, keeping her back to him.
“Teagan.”
“Sky.”
They’d both spoken at once and they laughed as she stood and turned to face him.
“Are you crying?” he asked.
She shook her head once then shrugged. Why hide it?
“Dammit,” he mumbled miserably.
108
Ruby Tuesday
“I’m sorry,” she said.
His face reflected his confusion. “Why?”
“I’ve put you in a position that really isn’t fair to you. I told myself you were just a rock star, convinced myself you were a caricature and I’ve held on to the stereotypes attached to that persona like a damn life vest.” He took a step closer. “I think I did the same thing.”
“How so?”
“There are some labels attached to virgins over the age of twenty.” She laughed. “I suppose there are. The thing is, Sky, you aren’t just a rock star.
You’re so much more than that and despite my attempts to avoid it, I think…I mean, I know…I’ve fallen in love with you.”
He opened his mouth to respond, but she waved his words away with her hand. “I don’t expect you to say anything. You’ve told me from the beginning how you feel about serious relationships and I know you aren’t looking for love. My feelings are my problem, not yours. I just wanted you to know how I feel. Maybe someday, somewhere down the road, you’ll remember me and you’ll be glad to know how much I cared about you.”
Sky stared at her, like the lost fool he was, his words failing him for the first time in his life. She’d done it, captured his heart, beaten down every crumbling structure he’d tried to erect against her. Worst part about it was, she wasn’t asking for his love. She would never do that. She’d spent her life giving of herself and never once asking for anything in return. And, like an asshole, he’d taken everything he could grab for free with no regard for what it would do to her when he left. She was the bravest woman he’d ever met and with that realization the blinders fell away.
Unfortunately so did his words.
“I-I don’t know what to say.”
109
Mari Carr
She nodded and he could see the effort it was taking her not to cry. “You don’t have to say anything, Sky.”
“Mitch.”
“What?”
“My real name. It’s Mitch Adams.” He wasn’t sure why he was offering her such a stupid fact at that moment, but all he could think was that he wanted her to know the real him. The normal man who wanted to live a normal life and love her until the day he died.
“It suits you.”
He stepped forward, relieved when she didn’t move away. Christ, she should be slapping him, hitting him, twisting his freaking earlobe after what he’d put her through the last couple of weeks. Reaching over, he placed his hands on her face, caressing her cheeks as he pulled her closer. She stood motionless as he bent to kiss her. As his lips touched hers, he knew all his excuses, his stupid ambitions paled in comparison to what this woman would mean to him. Be to him. He loved her.
For several moments, he tried to convey with his lips the feelings his screwed-up head was too afraid to confess. She pulled back.
“I can’t be casual with you anymore,” she whispered, her lips moving against his as she spoke the words, rife with pain.
He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her head to his chest.
“There’s nothing casual about this, gypsy. It’s earth-shattering, traumatic, amazing, disturbing—perfect.”
She laughed as she tightened her grip around his waist. “You realize those words don’t really go together.”
“I love you, Teagan. And believe me, in my screwed-up mind, every single one of those words applies.”
110
Ruby Tuesday
She pushed away so that he could see her lovely freckled face, a single tear sliding down amongst the light brown dots. “Will you make love to me?”
“Forever,” he vowed.
He took her hand and together they walked to the small bedroom. She led him to the bed again and he was amazed by the lack of haste. They undressed each other at a leisurely pace he could never have imagined. For weeks he’d burned for her, wanted until he thought he’d go mad with the craving. Now, as he slowly pulled the robe from her shoulders, he wanted nothing more than to savor every second, every sweet note.
He wasn’t merely writing a song with her. He was writing a symphony.
He pulled the T-shirt she wore over her head and smiled when the lovely pink flush he’d seen so many times painted her face and chest. “Still shy with me, Ruby?” he asked.
“It’s hot in here,” she said and he laughed at her obvious lie.
“Yeah, well, it’s gonna get hotter.”
She unbuttoned his shirt and he watched the slight quiver in her hands. Despite all they had done before, this was her first time and he wanted it to be special. Once she’d tackled the last button, he shrugged off the shirt before taking charge, pulling off his own shoes, socks and jeans.
Once they were completely naked, he stopped for a moment. He needed to catch his breath, calm his racing heart. “I love you,” he murmured again and she grinned.
“Trying to convince me or you?” she teased.
“No convincing needed. I’ve acted like a fool these past two weeks, trying to cling to a lifestyle I can’t stand. I want you beside me, Teagan, for as long as you’ll stay.” She placed her fingers on his lips. “I believe you. You don’t have to say anything.
Just love me.”
He kissed her again, using his lips, his hands to guide her back onto the bed. He covered her with his body and she groaned as his cock brushed against her pussy.
111
Mari Carr
He moved his lips from her mouth to her cheeks and ears, working his way along her neck and down to her breasts at a leisurely pace. He wanted to taste every part of her, mark her as his. He drew quarter notes on her nipples with his tongue and she giggled at the tickling sensation until he wrapped his lips around the tight nub and sucked.
“God,” she cried. Her legs wrapped around his waist and he was surprised by the strength of her need. “Inside me.”
“Soon,” he whispered, rubbing his lips against her fevered flesh. He pulled her legs away from him, drifting down her stomach with a long, luscious lick. When he got to her pussy, he was starving, ravenous. He’d intended for his teasing and continual soft touches to drive her insane, increase her desire, but in reality they had claimed
him
, made him a victim of his own tormenting, and he dove in with haste, tasting her sweet dew. She shook above him, her body in overdrive as he tormented her clit with his teeth before pushing his tongue inside her pussy. With his tongue, he mimicked the motions his cock was begging for until she jolted against him as if touched by a live wire. She screamed and he grinned at her incredible loss of inhibitions when in the throes of orgasm. She didn’t hold anything back.
He crawled over her, impatient to find his own release. He placed his cock at the entrance to her body and cursed.
“Fuck. Condom.” He moved rapidly to retrieve his wallet from the bedside table, pulling out the foil package and donning the damn rubber with shaking hands. He needed to be inside her. She laughed at his haste, using her own hands to still his as he slid the condom in place.
Once he was covered, he returned to her pussy, pushing the head in just an inch. He looked up at her face, determined to see every nuance of her expressions as he claimed her for the first time.
“You sure?” he asked, the words dragged from his lips by some unforeseen force—
his promise still hovering in the back of his mind.
112
Ruby Tuesday
“Positive.” She wrapped her legs around his waist again and this time he let her drag him to heaven.
He pushed in slowly, consumed by the extreme heat, the almost unbearable tightness of her body. She held on to him, guiding him inside with a level of trust that nearly broke him. She was his to care for, to love, and once he was seated to the hilt, he made a silent vow to himself that he’d always protect her.
“Ready to rock and roll?” he asked lightly, hoping to distract her lest she was in pain.
She gave him a thoughtful, considering look for a moment. “Well, I guess. If we have to.”
He laughed. “Hey, we could make this a slow country ballad. I just thought you might like the hard and fast beat of some heavy metal for a change.” He punctuated the words “heavy metal” with a short, firm thrust of his cock and she moaned.
“Heavy metal,” she gasped. “Definitely heavy metal.”
“Good choice,” he whispered as he placed a long, hard kiss on her lips. She wiggled impatiently after a few moments to let him know he was taking too long. He broke off the kiss and introduced her to his style of music—his thrusts hard and deep and strong.
She screamed louder than the most adoring fan as she came, but he continued to play the song, to love her with everything in his body. When she came again, he was helpless to resist the pull of her pussy on his cock and he gave himself up to the music, to her.
For several moments they lay perfectly still, connected in ways Sky couldn’t begin to fully appreciate or understand. All he knew was this was right. Very right.
Teagan’s eyes were closed and he grinned as he studied her flushed face. She looked good with some color in her cheeks. He was surprised when her husky voice broke the silence.
“I can’t wait to see what you do for an encore,” she said.
113
Mari Carr
The bed shook as they laughed, but soon the chuckles turned to kisses and the kisses gave way to touches.
It was an impressive encore. Even if he did say so himself.
* * * * *
Teagan opened her eyes, surprised to find the room cast in darkness, only the soft glow of the moon providing a bit of light. She and Sky had spent hours in bed, exploring each other’s bodies…and hearts. She still couldn’t quite make herself believe his professions of love. It simply seemed too good to be true.
She’d spent too much of her life convinced she was happy and content, pushing away any feelings of loneliness with a vengeance. One day in Sky’s arms, in his bed, had blown that misconception out of the water and she knew beyond a doubt she’d never truly known happiness until today. As far as first times went, she grinned with the certainty that she perhaps had just experienced the best one in the history of lost virginity.
“That’s a cat who ate the canary look,” Sky said, his voice husky, deep with sleep.
“Actually I think it would be more correct to just come out and say I look like a cat in heat,” she joked.
Sky’s eyes narrowed and she could see the hint of desire her words sparked. “I want you.”
She grinned. He’d said the exact same three words at least four times during the day. “You’re insatiable.”
He shrugged. “Part and parcel of the image.”
She laughed at his jest. “I better not show up in some tell-all book thirty years from now.”
“No promises there,” he said with a laugh. “Roll over onto your stomach.”
“Why?”
114
Ruby Tuesday
“Because there’s something I’ve wanted to do for two weeks and by God, I’m not waiting any longer.”
She turned over, surprised when he quickly covered her, his chest pressed snugly to her back. His cock prodded at the vee of her legs and she started to open them until he used his knees to trap them together.
“Keep your legs closed.”
She was instantly reminded of their first night in the cabin. The night they’d pushed their sex games too far.
He began to thrust between her legs, his thick, hard flesh rubbing against her clit until she thought she’d go mad. “Come inside me,” she whispered.
“Not yet.” He rose up on his knees and gripped her hips. “Raise your ass.” She obeyed, marveling at the fact she felt entirely comfortable despite being completely exposed to him.