Authors: Nichole Matthews
Rubbing his hand over his face,
he suddenly felt very tired
, but also very much alive
. Staring at the ceiling, Declan fell asleep with a satisfied smile on his face.
Absence from those we love
Is self from self—a deadly
Banishment
A Midsummer Night’s Dream
*William Shakespeare
W
hat have you done?” Poppy burst into Parker’s study and stood in front of his desk.
She had reached her wits ends. She believed women to live by their emotions, or so men would have them believe, but now she realized that it was truly men who had no control. Men who lived by passion without thought or without reason of the consequences.
Parker sat back. “I beg your pardon?”
“Where is Declan?”
She swallowed and looked at her hands, trying to keep her tears locked inside.
“Did you run him off?”
“I’ve done no such thing.”
He said, lifting his hands.
“No one has seen him all day.”
“Perhaps he has no desire to be found?”
Poppy stood staring at her brother as if he had sprouted a second head.
“When did you last see him?”
“Last night.”
Her voice was shaking badly and she tried to cover it by clearing her throat.
“As I recall, he arrived home quite late last night.”
Parker’s eyes bore into Poppy’s searching for what she wasn’t saying.
“I ran in to him quite unexpectedly after our performance.”
She shrugged.
“Poppy?”
Poppy skirted the side of Parker’s desk and stood beside him.
She blinked some more, desperate for the tears and the lump in her throat to recede.
“Please find him.”
***
Declan sat at a corner table in the shadows
,
a full days growth of beard marring his ge
n
er
ally smooth shaven jaw. He nursed
the same pint of ale he had started well ove
r an hour ago. It didn’
t matter. He had already drowned his racing thoughts with enough ale to
kill a normal
sized
man but he
had to put some distance between them before he convinced himself that he was truly good enough for her when he so obviously wasn’t.
For the past few days, in the face of his undying lust, he’d managed to convince himself again and again that he was not d
o
ing anything wrong, then the library occurred.
How had he let things proceed so far? He wasn’t used to denying himself, he also wasn’t into seducing innocent virgins.
And that was exactly what she was. And innocent. A virgin.
She was young. She barely knew anything of the world. The tragedies. The sacrifices one was forced to make at times. She needed gentile living with wildflowers at her fingertips. Not a man hardened by his inability to forgive himself and move forward.
What was shocking him to the core, what was at the heart of the matter, was that he no longer wanted to fight his feelings. He no longer wanted a different woman in his bed night
after night. He wanted but one and there was the rub.
His head fell forward and he sighed. A deep sigh that he felt all the way to his toes. He should have listened to Parker and left his sister alone.
When had he lost control of his disc
i
pline? And now here he was alone, unable to gain control of his emotions, and most definitely unable to gain control of his cock.
“I didn’t ask for company,” Declan said without bothering to raise his head from where he stared at the
time-scarred
table.
“Good thing I didn’t ask your permission.” Seymour slid down in his chair after lifting his finger to indicate he needed a drink.
He glanced up when someone sat in the chair opposite him
, not bothering to smile, a
l
lowing his scowl to remain a prominent fixture upon his visage
.
“Why must you hound me, Seymour?”
Declan lifted his pint and took a lusty swallow. His
pewter
mug made a loud thud as he set it hard on the table, wiping the foam from his upper lip with the sleeve of his costly jac
k
et.
Seymour’s brow rose disdainfully. “Dudley will not be pleased you are abusing your coat so egregiously.” He was surprised to see
how drawn Hawksley’s face was and the puffy redness that surrounded his
fuzzy
eyes.
“You and Dudley can go to the very devil where you have sprung.”
Seymour bit back a smile.
“Because you’re acti
ng like an ass.” He lifted
his brow
at D
e
clan’s disregard for his attire
and his atrocious attitude. “Poppy has
turned the entire hous
e
hold
u
p
side down seeking your whereabouts.”
“She needs to stay as far away from me as she can.”
“She will do that of her own accord with you pushing her away if you do not cease with feeling sorry for yourself.”
Declan was quiet for a second while he sipped his beer and considered the benefits of lying to his friend.
“I took advantage of the chit.”
“Excuse me?”
Declan’s
voice l
ow, laced with
angst
. “I’ll not repeat myself.”
“Then perhaps you would be more comfortable repeating yourself to me?”
Declan groaned at the sound of Parker’s voice.
He turned toward the third intruder at his once tiny table of solitude.
“Goddamn it, Hawk,” Parker growled. “We had an a
greement no one would be disho
n
oring
my sisters.”
Parker leaned down, palms flat on the table, nose to nose with Declan. “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t be
at
the shit out of you?”
Parker’s gaze chilled him to the bone. “I love her.”
“Then you bloody well better do something about it.”
Parker growled at him in warning
. Perhaps after the haze of alcohol has dissipated, you might use the brain God gave you and quit this infernal whining and crying.”
Parker narrowed his eyes on Declan.
“Grow up,” he added
before he
turned and stomped his way out of the tavern.
CHAPTER
EIGHTEEN
Doubt thou the stars are fire,
Doubt that the sun doth move,
Doubt truth to be a liar,
But never doubt I love.
Hamlet
*William Shakespeare
T
wo
days later Poppy stepped from her room only to stop at the sight of
D
eclan
lea
n
ing
back
;
one shoulder resting against t
he wall
across from her bedchamber
with his arms crossed
over his chest as if he hadn’t just disappeared without a word.
She was tired, tense, and too aware of him
which only added to her ire.
Hearing the
door unlatch, he straightened
a
ntici
pating
his first glimpse of her for the day. He knew he was acting like a complete fool but he did
n’t
care.
She was a vision in soft pink
sprigged muslin
and it did nothing to ease his attempt at indifference
, especially when she visibly stiffened at the sight of him
. “Good morning
,
beautiful.”
He offered her a tentative smile, not certain what her r
e
ception might be after he ran off with his tail between his legs.
The
deep
sound of his greeting was
s
eductive as she emerged from her room. Her pulse leapt at t
he velvet timbre of his voice she looked up. H
er
deep blue
eyes traveled the length of him
,
assessing the lean,
well-muscled
,
boot
-encased legs that were in front of her
u
n
til
finally r
eaching the breathtaking emerald
eyes t
hat seeming
ly
held
her
s
ca
p
tive
.
He felt an instan
tan
eous heat
when he locked gazes with her.
Just as he suspected, the sun rose the moment she bestowed him with one of her br
eathtaking smiles.
How could he have thought otherwise?
A wider grin spread over his lips when
he glimpsed her charming dimple peeping out. He was still amazed at how the sight of her caused his heart to race.
He stared
at her
rose
pink bowed
lips that
begged for his
kiss
, feeling
a lump form in his throat
at the uncontrollable physical response that came as a sweet shock.
A slow flush covered her face as memories from the library surfaced. She attempted to subdue the restless sensations that had settled in
the pit of h
er stomach
knowing her feelings were there for anyone to decipher
.
Irritation rose.
How could she be happy to see him when he held little concern for her feelings?
Declan push
ed himself away from the wall;
one corner of his mouth lifted
a little higher
as he crossed to her side. The urge to pull her into his arms was so strong that he curled his hands into
tight
fist
s
at his sides
to control his
carnal
impulses.
He took a final step toward her, so their bodies almost touched before l
eaning in,
touching
only h
is lips to hers
. Slow nibbling kis
s
es
that
sent shivers down her spine.
“Good
Morning,”
Poppy
whispered
back
, the kiss ending before she was able to touch him
. Gazing up at Declan, she once again felt hypnotized by the intensity of desire reflec
t
ing back at her
.
“
How
did you know that I would be exiting
my room
at this exact m
o
ment?
And
why are you making it a ha
b
it to startle
me?”
She could feel her eyes darken. She wanted to scream at him. How could he stand in front of her as if he had done nothing wrong?
He lightly ran
his fing
er down her nose and flashed
a slow, devastating smile that stole
her breath
.
“Oh, I have my ways
.”
He
winked
, even though inside he was concerned with the look in her eyes
. “I was hoping you might like to take a stroll with me before breakfast?” Threading his fingers with hers he raised her hand and pressed
a moist kiss to her palm,
inhal
ing
her
evoc
a
tive
scent deep
ly before tucking
her hand possessively in
the crook of
his arm, they chatted
ea
s
ily
as they
made their way to the garden.
As soon as they exited the house, Poppy turned on him. “How can you chat with me about inconsequential subjects when you disappeared for three days without a word?” Her hands planted firmly on her hips.