Sal (The Ride Series) (9 page)

Axel was also sort of scary. It was as though he carried a barely contained fury with him wherever he went. And when I’d asked Sal what he did for the club those many months ago, his answer had been quick and succinct.

“He’s the enforcer when we need it. You don’t fuck with Axel and live to talk about it.”

That had been the last time I’d asked for details about Axel.

“Sure, thanks,” I smiled as he took a seat next to me.

“You holdin’ up okay?” he asked.

“Yeah, I am,” I nodded. I saw Sal’s eyes snap over to us and narrow as he watched Axel. They’d always had some tension between them. I wasn’t sure the cause, but immediately grew concerned this could be the catalyst for a fire I did not want to be in the middle of.

Axel shifted in his seat and cleared his throat as though he was about to ask me something.

“What the
fuck
are you doing?” Sal demanded, suddenly towering over us, his face a picture of menace.

Axel looked up with narrowed eyes. “If you hadn’t interrupted, I was about to catch up with Kat,” he replied, completely unbothered by Sal’s anger. “The guys and I, we got used to lookin’ out for her,” he glared, shocking the hell out of me.

Judging from the look on Sal’s face, this was coming out of nowhere and was unlikely to end well.

“Come again?” Sal growled.

“Yeah, man,” he stated as though Sal was slow on the uptake. “This is a good woman you’ve got here. Do you know she fucking slept at the garage?” he demanded.

Sal’s eyes grew wide in surprise before creasing in question toward me.

I looked away, unable to meet his gaze.

“Didn’t think so,” Axel muttered, shaking his head as Wes and Mack wandered over to assess the tension.

“You got something to say?” Sal demanded, his fists balled at his sides.

“Sal man, you’re my brother,” Axel replied, his tone decidedly calmer. “But fuck man, take care with this one.” He cocked his head in my direction. “She didn’t deserve that shit. And with or without you, she’s part of this family,” he added firmly.

Well, hell. I was still new to the MC lifestyle, but even I knew it was huge that Axel was making such a statement.

The two men eyed each other, the tension so thick it was stifling. And then, Sal took a deep, measured breath. He tore his hand through his already unruly head of hair and sighed. “No argument from me on that, man,” he agreed. “I should have been here.”

I felt my head spin with confusion.

I was suddenly so angry at Sal. How dare he leave the way he did and then come barreling back into my life making such proclamations?

“This is so fucked up,” I muttered quietly to no one in particular.

“Kat,” Sal’s deep voice rumbled, clearly not wanting to have this conversation here.

Well, too fucking bad!

“No!” I shook my head as I stood up, not caring if people were staring. “You have the audacity to come bursting back into my life and act like you have some say over it. You cannot be believed!” I exclaimed, yanking my arm away when he tried to hold onto me and stalked toward the street. I didn’t know where I was going, but I wasn’t staying here.

I got a half-block away before strong arms grabbed me from behind, stopping me in my tracks. I immediately tried to get out from his embrace.

“I’m sorry, all right? Really fucking sorry,” his deep voice murmured in my ear. His words were enough to make me freeze up completely, and I stood stiffly in his arms.

I turned to him and pushed him away. “How could you do that to me?” I choked. “You turned me inside out. And now what? You’re back to try to do it again?” I ranted, wiping the tears that had started to fall with the back of my hand. “I tried hard enough the first time and it was never good enough!” I exclaimed.

“It was never you, baby,” he said as he shook his head sadly.

“Oh, so this is the ‘it’s not you it’s me speech’? That’s rich,” I scoffed.

“It’s different now. I’m different,” he said quietly, his dark eyes piercing mine.

I stared at him, my eyes wide with shock. Of all the things I’d expected him to say this wasn’t it.

“How? How’s it gonna be different, Sal?” I demanded hoarsely. “You couldn’t even hold my fucking hand when we were out together. You never even took me out on a freaking date! Not once! Do you have any idea how that made me feel? But I accepted it; I knew it was how you were. Along with all the walls so thick, I had no hope of breaking them down. And then what did you do?” I demanded, surprised at the venom in my voice. “You walked out on me!” I cried, all of the anger and hurt I’d felt for months rising to the surface in a tenacious wave. “And you expect me to believe all the reasons why you left have changed in six months? That I’m suddenly the girl for you because I certainly wasn’t before.” I demanded.

“Why didn’t you ever say any of this before?” he demanded, his own temper flaring.

“Because I didn’t want to try to change you! And I didn’t want to push too hard. I thought we had
time
. I tried to be patient because I loved you.”

Oh, shit, I hadn’t meant to say that.

“I’m sorry, you
what
?” he asked incredulously.

“Nothing, never mind,” I shook my head adamantly.

He took another step toward me and put his hands gently on my arms, peering down at me. “That was not nothing,” he pressed, his eyes glowing with warmth.

I remained silent, there was no way in hell I trusted my tongue at this point.

“I’ll get you to say it again,” he said more to himself than to me.

I simply shook my head in order to get a handle on the tumult of emotions raging through me. More tears spilled down my cheeks and I cursed myself for allowing myself to be this raw.

He pulled me into his arms in a tight embrace, and I gripped his shirt with my fists. I was so angry with him, but I loved him so much. He had me turned so inside out I didn’t know how to right myself again.

I felt him kiss the top of my head and squeeze me tighter still. “I’ve got you,” he whispered.

“You keep saying that,” I complained, my voice muffled by his shirt.

He chuckled. “Well, I do,” he said. “Haven’t you figured that out yet?”

“Sure of yourself,” I muttered.

“I’m sure of you,” he amended. “That has never changed,” he said as he peered down into my face. “Look,” he started with a sigh, “I learned a lot about myself while I was gone. I worked a lot of shit out. I’m still working it all out. And I want to tell you about it. I’m just…I’m still getting there. But, I want you to know I want to try. For you, for us, I want to try,” he told me earnestly.

That was big for Sal. No, that was
huge
.

“Let’s go home,” he suggested before I could ask him one of the million questions on the tip of my tongue. He put an arm around me and led us toward his bike. I didn’t miss the fact he’d called his place “home,” but I was too tired to argue semantics at the moment.

He handed me my helmet and swung his leg over the bike. The sound of it roaring to life sent an unexpected thrill through me.

“Ready?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I nodded, trying unsuccessfully to hide my enthusiasm at getting back on the bike.

“I’ll take the long way,” he chuckled.

We rode through the warm night, the air caressing my face. Despite all of the questions still unanswered, I felt a surprising sense of peace. I’d told Sal I loved him, something I’d always been scared to death to do. And he didn’t run for the hills. Instead, he seemed determined to have me say it again. I knew without a doubt, with this glimmer of hope for Sal and me, that I needed to take the chance. I’d grown up with next to nothing and had lived most of my life focused on survival. I wanted so badly to be happy, to be loved, and I wanted those things with Sal. Maybe he hadn’t changed. Maybe I’d get hurt again. But anything was better than never knowing, or trying to keep him at arm’s length when all I wanted to do was let him in.

Except now I didn’t know how to tell him about my new found epiphany.

We’d gotten home, taken turns getting ready for bed, and were now both lying in Sal’s bed. There hadn’t been any discussion about him sleeping on the couch, and I was glad to avoid it. He was lying on his back with his arm behind his head, the muscles in his arms on prominent display.

“You went to the garage?” he asked quietly through the dim light.

“Yeah,” I murmured, staring up at the ceiling.

“Why?”

It was such a simple question, and yet the answer was so confounding.

“I was so mad and hurt when you left,” I swallowed audibly. “But I couldn’t sleep. Couldn’t get my bearings. Somehow, being there, feeling close to you, well, it helped,” I admitted.

I heard his pillow rustle as he turned to face me. “Thinking about you sleeping in that empty garage will break my heart for the rest of my days, babe,” he rasped.

I turned my head to meet his heated gaze, surprised and warmed by the passion I saw reflected in the dark depths of his eyes.

I looked back up to the ceiling. “So where were you?” I asked, feeling finally brave enough to ask the question that would lead us into uncertain territory.

He sighed and I heard the familiar rasp of his hand moving over the whiskers on his chin. “Spain, for a while anyway. I went to go track down my father and his family,” he told me.

My eyes opened wide, that wasn’t what I had been expecting. All he’d told me in the past was he’d never met his father. His mother, who was American, had a one-night stand with his father while on vacation. She came from money, and it was a huge scandal when she’d let a Spanish man knock her up after one night. She’d then had Sal here in the U.S.. His dad had never been in the picture.

“And, were you able to?” I asked quietly.

“Yeah,” he nodded, rubbing his hand along his jaw as though lost in thought. “I met him and my grandma, some of my aunts and cousins, too.”

“What’s your father like? How was it meeting him?” I propped myself up on my elbow unable to hide my curiosity.

He shrugged and I could tell he was already shutting down. Part of me felt deeply disappointed, hungry as I was for knowledge about him, while the other part felt relieved he’d opened up at all.

If I was zeroing in on my question threshold for the night, I had one more I had to get out.

“What made you come back?” I asked somewhat hesitantly.

He rolled to his side, his warm eyes only inches from mine. “Isn’t it obvious by now? I came back for you,” his deep voice replied. “I thought I couldn’t breathe before - all my life I felt that way. I knew I needed to try to figure my shit out. But it wasn’t until I left you that I realized all the good air’s with you,” he admitted with a half-smile before turning back to the ceiling.

I stared at him in shock at his admission. Not only at what it meant, but the fact he’d admitted it. It was so honest and sweet.

But I was still confused about something. “If you came back for me, if you thought about me, then why didn’t you call?” I asked.

“I couldn’t.” He shook his head sadly. “If I heard your voice, I knew I’d lose my focus and head straight back home. I had to finish what I started, and I had to do it alone,” he explained. He looked at me with wide, earnest eyes. “Do you think you can forgive me? Can you come to a place where you can try to understand?”

Could I? I knew if we were going to make another go of it, I couldn’t hold this over his head. I had to try to move past it and forgive him for leaving the way he had. It would take time, but I was willing to do it for him. I swallowed and looked off to the side before I nodded slightly.

He blew out a relieved sounding breath as we sat in contemplative silence.

“That Gavin guy, did you like him?” he asked, surprising me with his train of thought.

I sighed. “He’s a great guy. But, no, I didn’t have any feelings for him.”

”Good,” he answered simply.

“While you were away, were there---?” I swallowed audibly, unable to finish my question about other women.

“No, baby,” he said as he shook his head firmly.

We stared at each other for a few intense moments before I rolled to my back, needing a minute to collect myself. Plus, I was too chicken to make the first move and I knew he was waiting for me after everything between us tonight.

I believed him about the other women. Oddly enough, for Sal and I that had been one of the few things we’d never had issues with. I knew he’d been with his fair share before me. I saw the way the unattached women at the club clamored for his attention. But, once we’d hooked up, Sal’s eyes had never strayed. He’d never paid a moment’s focus to any other woman except me.

“Let’s get some sleep,” he suggested after a while.

“Okay,” I agreed, quietly wishing like hell he’d roll his beautiful body over mine and take me. I’d never had to make any moves with Sal. I was in unchartered territory.

I tossed and turned for hours, not even close to sleep. I tried not to disturb Sal with my movements.

Finally, hours later and exasperated with myself, I got up to get a glass of water. I stood by the sink drinking, and when I started to move, I backed into a hard, bare chest.

I spun around with a small shriek, surprised. I looked up at him and my panties were immediately wet from the carnal expression on his face.

“You’re never going to do it are you?” his deep voice asked, sending tingles down my spine as he backed us up against the counter.

“Do what?” I asked breathlessly.

“Make the first move,” he answered.

I bit my lip and shook my head.

“Tired of waitin’, baby,” he growled as his lips slammed down on mine.

Thank
God
.

Suddenly, my ass was on the counter and he’d moved in-between my legs, devouring my mouth like a man starved. I moaned quietly, relishing the connection, and wrapped my arms and legs around him to pull him closer. I could feel his erection at my core through my thin shorts. I’d never wanted anything more in my life than to have him inside me.

His tongue conquered my mouth, his lips kissing and sucking at my lower lip. I pulled him deeper into me with my heels, and he groaned into my mouth. Suddenly, I was airborne, and he was stalking toward the bedroom with me still wrapped around him.