Sara's Surprise (15 page)

He wagged his finger at her. "I never run from an unbuttoned woman."

"Well, relax. Surprise. I don't breastfeed."

Kyle leaned against a wall near the door, making certain that he was standing where Noelle couldn't crane her head and see him easily. Already she was waving her arms and looking around. "Oh? Why not?"

"It hurt too much each time I boiled my nipples." When he looked at her blankly, not quite certain why anyone would boll nipples, their own or otherwise, she laughed again. "I can see that you know as little about feeding babies as I did." She smiled, her green eyes alight with affection. "That's all right. To answer your question, I didn't have enough milk to make the effort worth Noelle's trouble. So after a couple of months of dedicated misery for both of us, I started giving her a bottle."

He shook his head. "A scientist and an expert mother. Now when I talk to you I can feel ignorant on two levels."

"Believe me, being a scientist came easier to me than being a mother. I always trusted facts rather than instincts. But now that I've got the hang of motherhood, I think my instincts are pretty reliable."

"I'd say they're terrific."

She blushed with pleasure. "Would you like to be introduced to Noelle?"

"Later."

Her eyes clouded. "Is anything wrong?"

"Nah. I just thought I'd go down to the security guard's office and check on Daisy. She might have fallen asleep and been mistaken for a doorstop during the night."

"All right, but come here and say hello first." She reached into the crib, her eyes gleaming with pride as she studied the baby. Slowly she lilted Noelle out. "She's not quite herself, so don't expect any smiles yet. Kyle? Kyle?"

He had already left the room.

Sara's confusion and worry grew when he waited an hour before returningand came back then only after sending a nurse's aide to make certain that Noelle was napping. He strode in quickly, looking brusque and formal even though he was still dressed in yesterday's sweat pants and a faded football jersey.

"Daisy survived the night," he announced, "but two doctors and a lab technician were hypnotized watching her sleep. They're lying on their backs on the floor, snoring, with their arms and legs in the air. It's not a pretty sight."

Sitting on the bed, Sara shifted Noelle in her arms and was dismayed to see him take a step back, as if wary. "She is asleep, isn't she?" he asked.

"Yes, Kyle," she answered, frowning.

"I've taken care of the checkout process. As soon as a nurse comes to wheel Noelle downstairs, we can leave. I thought I'd let you and the baby have the back seat of the car, and I'll put Daisy in the front with me."

"Does your car have a trunk? Noelle and I could sit in there if you're really ashamed to be seen with us."

He looked so stunned and then so apologetic that she regretted her barb. "I'm not ashamed," he said hotly.

"Then what is it?"

"Nothing." Noelle stirred, yawned, and rubbed her eyes. "I'll be downstairs in the car," he said, abruptly leaving the room.

When they returned to the keep he went to the kitchen to fix a late breakfast.

"I've unlocked the doors to the back," Sara told him after she had finished settling Noelle in her crib. "You're welcome to come see the lab, the greenhouse, and the nursery too. If you're interested."

He studiously pushed strips of bacon around on a griddle. Sara noted that his bacon was laid out in neat, orderly rows. It was military bacon, a sign of an organized mind. When she cooked bacon she usually spent too much time trying to see where it cooked fastest in the pan, or which end curled first, or how the amount of shrinkage related to the heat of the stove. Usually she ended up with burned bacon.

"I'd like to see the lab and greenhouse," he told her.

But not Noelle's nursery
. Sara sat down at the table and watched him carefully. He was either worried about Noelle's reaction to his. scars, or he wasn't too pleased to have a baby around in general. There was one way to find out.

"I'll be back in a minute," she said pleasantly.

"Not too long. I'm scrambling the eggs right now."

By the time she returned, carrying Noelle, he was dumping the finished eggs on a plate. He pivoted, saw the baby staring at him, and froze.

Her heart in her throat, Sara glanced at Noelle's equally startled eyes and prayed for good results. "Kyle, meet Noelle. Noelle, meet Kyle. Ky-ul."

The coaching over the past few days paid off. Noelle's head bobbed toward Sara, then back toward Kyle. "Cal." she said distinctly.

Sara tried to smile despite the tension Kyle radiated. "Congratulations," she quipped. "Your name is now Cal. Don't feel bad. My name is Mop. At least yours is flattering."

"She's going to cry."

Sara glanced at Noelle's puckering mouth. "Probably. Later on she'll also soil her diapers, throw her toys, and argue when I try to get her to take a nap. All perfectly typical of a day in the life of a baby. It won't have anything to do with her like or dislike for you."

"Cal," Noelle said again, with more emphasis. She reached out with a small hand, curling her fingers at him.

"Why is she doing that?" he demanded. "Look, she's getting teary."

He was right. The tears slid down her cheeks. She turned her head and burrowed into Sara's shoulder. With sinking hopes Sara watched Kyle's expression stiffen into a mask. Only his eyes revealed his humiliation and sorrow.

"I can pretty much guarantee that it won't get any better than it is right now," he said grimly.

"I think you're wrong," Sara said. "But for now well drop the subject." She turned to leave the room.

Noelle was now crying softly, making tired little noises. But her hand shot out over Sara's back, toward Kyle. "Cal!" she called plaintively.

Sara swiveled back to face Kyle. "She wants you or something you've got. Since you're a stranger, I suspect 'Cal' refers to scrambled eggs. Why don't you bring her a spoonful?"

"And see her retreat completely?"

"No, that only seems to be what you're doing."

"Yow. That went right to the heart."

He got a teaspoon and jabbed it into the pile of eggs. Slowly he advanced toward Noelle, the spoon clasped tightly in his big, nimble fingers. Noelle stared at him without blinking, without breathing.

"I feel as if I'm watching a lion tamer trying to sneak up on a lion," Sara teased gently. "Kyle, you look as if you think she might roar."

"She might," he said in a tense, hushed voice.

She opened her mouth, but only to accept the eggs. In her usual fashion she ate half and let half decorate her lower lip. His fingers trembling, Kyle wiped her mouth. She pursed her lips at him in gratitude and made a smacking sound. She held out her arms.

Sara's throat burned with tears. "She wants to give you a kiss. Do you mind?"

"Are you sure that's what she wants?"

"She might ask for a date later. But I think you're safe."

He moved closer by inches, alert for any sign that Noelle was going to recoil the second she discovered that he didn't look like other people. Sara realized that until today Noelle had seen very few people besides herself and her mother. For all Noelle knew, every man had funny lines and ridges on his face. And what girl, of any age, could resist Kyle's big blue eyes?

He placed his face within kissing range. Noelle grabbed his hair with both hands and planted a tiny, soft pucker on his cheek. A look of wonder came into his eyes. "Can I hold her?" he asked hoarsely.

"Of course. But don't be upset if she doesn't like it. You're a stranger."

A beloved one, apparently. Noelle put her arms around his neck and sat very still inside the crook of his elbow. His face, perhaps because it was unusual, mesmerized her. She gave him a sudden smile, bright, dimpled, and totally unafraid. And then she kissed him right on one of his scars, like a tiny enchantress releasing him from an evil spell.

Sara put her head on his shoulder and looked away so that he could stop fighting the moonlight that shimmered in his eyes.

For the rest of the day he and Noelle were inseparable. He carried her around the castle, listening solemnly while she described things in terms no one but another baby might understand. He helped feed her and laughed when she threw stewed apple at him. He read Zane Grey to her. He held her while she slept.

And the whole time Sara said silent prayers of thanks and other prayers that this was just the beginning of a dream so wonderful that nothing could ever destroy it. She watched Kyle with so much love that she knew he couldn't help but notice; she floated effortlessly through the day in a haze of affection and desire and finely tuned anticipation.

As a chilly mooncast autumn night settled around the keep, they built a fire in the great room. The smell of it permeated the castle with a cozy feeling of comfort and happiness. In the kitchen Kyle fixed dinner while Noelle babbled at him from her high chair and Sara simply sat at the kitchen table, smiling.

Afterwards they sat on the couch in front of the fire and quietly watched Noelle pester Daisy. "I never thought I'd like dogs again," Kyle murmured. "But I guess Daisy's unique. She's not a dog. She's an ottoman that slobbers."

Sara wanted to slide close to him on the couch, but she sensed some reserve. It wasn't going to be easy for him to relax, to believe that she saw so much more than the scars when she looked at him. She smiled and sipped from a mug of cider laced with brandy, confident that everything would work out.

"I didn't want a dog," she told Kyle. "I didn't want anything to remind me of that day in the courtyard. But Daisy was so opposite from those monsters. She reminded me of the good that balances all the bad."

"Not all of it," he corrected her, frowning thoughtfully into his own mug. "But enough."

"Noelle is a balance."

"Yes." His expression softened. "You're right about that. She's your best revenge."

"My what?"

"The compensation for what Valdivia put you through. The only good thing that came out of the situation. Do you understand what I'm saying? Because you were in Surador and you met Noelle's father, you have a wonderful little girl." He hesitated, then said grimly, "No. I'm sorry I put it that way. I won't give Valdivia any credit for bringing Noelle into the world. I don't even like to think of the bastard being indirectly responsible for you having her."