Savage Conquest (44 page)

His words were as physical blows. Tears welled in
her golden brown eyes, and her face became the color
of fire. "You need not be cruel, Blazing Star. I've
never chased any man, and I surely won't start with
one who despises me and deceives me. I didn't mean to give you the impression I was the whore you called
me. But I can understand why you would think such
evil of me after the way I behaved when we first met. I
don't need or want you as my friend. I won't inflict
my repulsive company on you again or trouble you
further," she told him then fled.

Before Miranda reached the teepee, Tom Fletcher
met her, saying he needed to escort her back today as
he was leaving on a scouting mission tomorrow at
noon. This timely rescue was welcomed, and she told
him she was ready to leave and would fetch her
belongings. When she entered the teepee, her
grandfather was still asleep. She decided it would be
better to leave without awakening him, for he might
read her turmoil, and she wanted the painful matter
between her and her tormenting love kept private.
She took the small bundle of her possessions. She
wondered who could give her farewell message to her
grandfather. She could not ask Sitting Bull or Crazy
Horse, as both had left camp. Whom could she trust
to be kind and gentle?

Yellow Bird, wife of Fox Eyes, was the perfect
choice. She took one last look at her grandfather, love
and sadness filling her. It was best to avoid a painful
good-by, and it was vital to avoid Blazing Star.
Perhaps Fate had kindly provided this gentle
departure. She left the teepee, clutching the little
burden under her arm. She explained to Yellow Bird
why she wished to leave secretly, to spare her
grandfather's feelings and hers. The woman did not concur, but agreed to pass along the message when it
was too late to follow or stop her. Yellow Bird sensed
there was more to her hasty and furtive departure, but
she did not feel she had the right to pry.

Miranda and Tom walked to the edge of camp to
mount their horses and ride away. She suppressed the
anguish which plagued her. She told herself she was
doing the right thing for everyone. She wished
Blazing Star had remained a mystery, a lovely
fantasy. They set out in the direction of the tree-lined
gully where she had awaited the response from her
grandfather a few days past. She would never regret
riding brazenly into his camp. It was done; her quest
was over and her dreams had vanished. Perhaps she
would visit her grandfather briefly again before
returning to Virginia.

For two hours, Yellow Bird fretted over the girl's
departure. Finally, she could restrain herself no
longer. She went to find Blazing Star, as she dreaded
to tell Sun Cloud of her part in this matter. When the
warrior heard her tale, he told her not to repeat it to
Sun Cloud, that he would explain Tamaha's actions.
It was too late to catch up with her, to change her
mind.

After repeating the astonishing tale to Sun Cloud,
Blazing Star revealed that he was going after her. He
said he would sneak to her cabin during the night
and speak with her, to make sure she was home safely
and nothing was troubling her. Sun Cloud could tell
that the warrior was concerned for his grand daughter. It almost seemed as if Blazing Star
suspected another motive behind her secret departure.

He did. Blazing Star could not forget the look on
her face or the sound of her voice when he had
scolded her. He had not meant to make it sound as if
he despised her, scorned her. He had to see that she
was all right. He quickly mounted his horse,
knowing he could not allow her to leave this way. He
must have hurt her deeply.

To prevent the discovery of their trip, Tom and
Miranda rode hard and fast until they neared the
outskirts of the fort shortly after midnight. They
dismounted and spoke for a few minutes, as talk had
been impossible along the trail. Miranda did not
realize the effect she had on Tom when she caught his
hand and thanked him as she smiled genially and
gratefully. It had been an innocent and friendly
gesture for her, but one which stirred Tom's blood
and passion. As she sneaked to her cabin, Tom
guarded her. He had sensed a sadness, a conflict
within her, and he wanted to comfort her, but he was
afraid of alarming or offending her. At that moment
Tom knew he must have her, and knew a path to such
a victory was near.

When Miranda was inside, he left with no one the
wiser about their actions. Miranda was relieved that
Jane had left yesterday for a scouting trek southward
and would be gone for several weeks. Once Tom left
tomorrow, she would be alone for a time. Frankly,
she didn't care; she was glad to have solitude. She secured the door, went into the small bedroom, and
began to unpack her belongings.

As she lifted her nightgown, she felt something
hard and heard a strange noise. She opened the
bundle to find a tormenting and baffling gift. It was a
wanapin, a special necklace. There was a long, sharp
bear claw suspended on a leather thong, and there
were five rattler-rings separated by six sets of blue
beads between twelve white beads, strung on either
side of the unforgettable weapon of the grizzly. It was
evident who had made the necklace and hidden it in
her bundle. It was also evident who had taken her
first souvenir, though she had presumed she had lost
the rattler-ring from her dress pocket that awesome
day.

But why had he made it, and why had he concealed
it so she would find it after their separation? Did he
want her to have a remembrance of their meetings, of
him? She began to cry softly. If he cared about her,
why had he been so cruel and cold?

Miranda placed the haunting necklace on the table
near the bed. She changed into her nightgown and
flung the covers aside. Before she could get into bed,
she heard a soft tapping at her door. At first she
tensed in panic then decided it must be Tom with a
message. She went to the door and called softly,
"Who's there?"

Knowing she would not open the door to him,
Blazing Star muffled his voice and said, "Tom," in
an undistinguishable whisper.

When she asked what he wanted, he muffled his voice so that she was compelled to open the door to
hear his words. She stood behind the thick door and
peered around it as she said, "I couldn't hear you."

"Tamaha," he called her Indian name as he
pushed the door aside and entered. "I must speak
with you."

Miranda turned and stared at him. "What are you
doing here? Get out before I scream for help. As I
recall, we have nothing to say."

He stepped forward, pinning her between his
iron-muscled arms and the door, which he closed and
locked. "Why did you sneak away like a cunning fox
in the night? Sun Cloud worries over this behavior."

She looked up at him through tear-soaked lashes.
This time, she did not want to see him or talk with
him. She did not want him maliciously toying with
her emotions again. She should not have trusted
Yellow Bird. How dare he come here to torment her!
She pushed his confining arm away and walked into
her bedroom to retrieve something. He followed her
to the doorway. She snatched up the necklace and
flung it at him, sneering, "I don't want your gifts! I
don't want anything to remind me of you! Just stay
away from me, you beast!"

He had ducked to avoid the forcefully thrown
necklace. He came toward her, closing the short span
which separated them. When she attempted to flee
past him, he lunged at her and reached for one wrist.
She fought him wildly, cursing and berating him in a
quiet tone. When he attempted to imprison her arms,
she shocked him by seizing his arm and whirlingand flipping him to the floor with a thud. As he
scrambled to his feet, she kicked him in the abdomen.
Unprepared for such a blow and action, he was
knocked backward to his seat in the middle of the
doorway. He stared at her as she assumed a crouched
position, ready to ward off his next attack. As he
grabbed the doorframe to rise, he observed her stance
and hand positions.

"Where did you learn to fight this way?" he asked
warily. No one had ever thrown him, not in a contest
or battle! How could this fragile girl do what no
warrior had done? "You are a trained warrior in
skills many men cannot master. But if you continue
this battle or scream, others will know of my presence
here. You will be trapped by danger and shame, and I
will be captured and killed," he advised her, hoping
to settle her down so they could talk.

"I know skills which can bring a quick death or a
slow one. Come near me, and I will show you," she
warned. "Return to your camp. Don't waste time on
a white girl with whorish ways," she sneered coldly.
"And thank Yellow Bird for her betrayal."

She was full of anguish and fury. He had to deal
with her carefully. "Your grandfather is sad you left
this way. Will you return?" he asked, trying to
distract her from their personal battle.

"It was not wrong to refuse to say farewell to his
face. Perhaps I will try to visit him before I return
home. But I will never return while you are there,"
she vowed, relaxing when he did not retaliate.

"Then I will go away to allow your grandfather this time with you," he offered seriously, for the
white war council meeting to the west might prevent
it later. "I accept your terms. Let us go swiftly."

"No. I haven't decided if I will go back to his camp.
When and if I do, I won't need your escort! You were
right; I should not have come or remained. It is better
for both of us that I left this way."

"I will tell him why you left. I will speak the truth,
Tamaha," he informed her. "He will be hurt that I
drove you from his side. I spoke falsely and cruelly,"
he confessed contritely.

"To you, my name is Miranda Lawrence. But if
you're really concerned about him, you'll lie to spare
his feelings. You've certainly had plenty of practice
at deception! Explain how the scout came for me. I
didn't run away. He doesn't have to worry about me.
I can defend myself, and I have a gun."

"I will tell him all that happened between us," he
declared.

"No! I want you out of my sight," she told him.
"And take your gift with you. I don't want anything
you've touched and nothing to remind me of you. I
wish you'd never come home while I was there. I
would rather have remembered you as ..." She
halted the confession and cried, "Go away! I hate
you, you bloody savage!"

. Her icy tone and expression alarmed him. Had his
game succeeded beyond his wishes? How could he
tell her that his words had been meant to free them
from this trap they faced? How could he say there
could be no love between them, when they both felt such an emotion now? How could he claim their
lives could not mingle, when they already had many
times? "My words were harsh, Tamaha. I was angry
when I heard you pulled the eyes of Crazy Horse to
you many times. Why so after you showed desire for
me? It is dangerous to desire you when you have
offered your heart to our chief. Return to camp. I will
not hurt you more, but I cannot remove the pain I
have inflicted."

"That's ridiculous! Crazy Horse is a stranger; he's
married. We've only talked a few times. I would never
flirt with him. And I didn't go there searching for
you. I never expected to see you again, and I wish I
hadn't!" she vowed angrily, but her revealing gaze
belied her words. She scoffed, "What makes you
think I have such feelings for you, you conceited
rogue? And the only reason you caught and held my
brief interest was because you enticed it! What female
wouldn't be curious about a handsome and mysterious stranger who saved her life two times? But I'm
not a she-bitch in heat! I never asked you to desire me!
I never asked you to do anything for mel"

Her voice altered as she confessed, "Yes, you did
hurt me. You hurt me because I thought we ... were
friends. First you said we must talk; then, you
claimed there was nothing to say! You offered
friendship and comfort; then you behaved as my
enemy and tormented me. I don't understand youl
Play your games on someone else, Blazing Star,
You're a wicked devil; I'll never ... like you again."

When he did not respond, she asked sarcastically, "Would you explain a few things? Who told you I
was chasing after your chief? And why would you
believe such lies? I'm not in love with him and never
could be. You sound as if it's a crime or a sin to find
me desirable. Even so, why punish me for your
feelings? I didn't try to entrap you. I only wanted to
know why you were avoiding me and being so cold
after behaving so differently the other times we met."

He inhaled deeply. "The wife of Crazy Horse and
others think you desire him and he desires you. To
become his second wife would cause much trouble in
his teepee and much trouble in camp. Perhaps envy
blinded their eyes to the truth. When I said I must not
desire you, it was for your happiness and safety, and
mine. You were to leave on the new sun. If you
desired me as I believed, it would be wrong to take
you to my mat knowing our union would make you
think I was claiming you as my woman, my mate. If
you yielded to me, it would change nothing between
us. When you learned this, you would hate me; you
would think I used your desire to trick you to my mat.
You are beautiful and rare, Tamaha. You strip a
warrior's mind of reason and place wild thoughts in
his head. You cause a man's blood to run swiftly and
his body to hunger. I cannot help wanting you. I
thought it wiser to cool the heat which burns within
us."

"You think I'm a whore, Blazing Star? You think I
would sleep on the mat of a stranger? That you and I
would ... Even so, when does a man unselfishly
reject a woman he finds desirable? Besides, I would never sleep with a man I didn't love," she told him
bluntly.