I shake my head, trying to ignore the emptiness of not having Jazz and the memory of her death. I have enough on my plate, no sense in bringing even more ghosts to life. I take a deep breath and look at Dragon.
“I still don’t understand why the club got involved.”
“Dance, they’re your family, whether you acknowledge it or not. That was why. Still, you haven’t finished looking at the last picture.”
I look back through the folder to find the photo in question. My body breaks out into a cold sweat and my breath stalls.
Fuck me. Why? What would be the point?
I pull it from the rest and look. It is a picture of me covered in the blood of the man I had killed. Carrie is crying and reaching for me as the police pull me away. I remember that night easily. It is engrained in my brain and frozen there in stark clarity.
I remember the feel of the knife in my hand, the breeze in the air, the stink of the dark alley, the way the moon shone down on Carrie’s auburn curls, the lust in the fucker’s eyes as he ripped the shirt off her shoulders and put his fat, dirty hands on her small, pale breasts. I remember everything. Every. Last. Thing.
Yet, there is one thing I had somehow forgotten. Maybe semi-forgotten, but just the same I didn’t remember it as strongly—until right now. The dim memory of how it felt to have Carrie in my arms when I promised I would protect her. For a moment everything in my life had been…right. It hadn’t lasted long, because minutes later men were tearing me away. I could do nothing but listen to her cry out my name.
I turn the picture over, read the writing on the back and my blood runs cold. My heart freezes.
Vengeance shall be mine. Phoenix.
“Who the fuck is Phoenix?”
“If you had been around here sooner, that would be one of the answers you would know. Dance, I told you the club needs you. We’ve got crap to take care of since the mess with the traitors.”
Dragon never used Irish’s name. He hadn’t since the day it happened. When he came to the prison to tell me about it, he used the man’s name once and after that it was never used again. I understood it, hell I felt the same. It was bitter shit to know that a brother we trusted as one of our own would do that shit. Twist wasn’t that hard. Neither Dragon nor I had emotions tied up in the man. Irish had been a brother. If I had room for more nightmares, Irish might have been in them.
“I’m here now. Tell me who the fuck it is that’s been coming after Carrie.”
“I’d watch my tone, Dance.”
“Bullshit, if some fucker was coming after your woman you’d be worse. Now tell me who the fuck I’m dealing with.”
“Well don’t that beat all,” Dragon says and leans back in his chair, his eyes raking over me and instantly making me uncomfortable. Dragon sees more than the normal man, it is one of the things that makes him such a good leader.
“Drag…”
He holds up his hand to stop me from going on and then pulls himself close into the table.
“After the shit with Nic and her girl I went after Skull and his men full force. All roads led to them and I was ready for heads to roll. Only, it seems Tiny had just signed on with Skull’s crew a month out. He came recommended by their parent charter.”
I nod because while I figure this shit has nothing to do with me, it will eventually lead me to what I need to know.
“Skull swears he didn’t know about Tiny and what the fucker did.”
“You believe him?”
Dragon shrugs, but eases back in his chair.
“Skull’s a smarmy son of a bitch, but he has a code and top of that code is no hurting women or children.
“So who is this fucker?”
“Some ass wipe having a ball toying with me and mine,” Dragon growls.
“So you’re saying we have no idea who this asshole is?”
“I didn’t say that. Got to wonder though, if you’re so done with the club and you hate Red so much, why you care?”
“Drag, psycho-analyze some other motherfucker, I’m not playing.”
Dragon gives a half laugh, looks me over once more and rubs his chin and the side of his face, as if he’s deciding something.
“The cop you gutted, turns out his dad has some pretty powerful connections.”
“What’s that mean?”
“This motherfucker is the father of the man you killed.”
“If that’s true, I could see him coming after me, after Carrie even, but why the club?”
“Because you are the club and it’s not a secret I pulled in every marker I had to try and get your ass out of trouble.”
“So why can’t we just find this guy and put a bullet in him?”
“Damn, why the fuck didn’t I think of that?” Dragon asks sarcastically and then flips me off. “Because, the man is like a fucking ghost. I can’t find him. His bank accounts, his house, hell any of his assets haven’t been touched since the shit with Twist and company. We’ve got surveillance in place; we’ve added someone in the bank to watch over things. Fuck, I’ve even had Freak mess around and freeze his account with a fake levy. We’re coming up with nothing.”
“All this over a sniveling piece of shit that didn’t deserve to take his next breath of air.”
“No, motherfucker. All this and more is because you went off half-cocked. Dance, I got your back man, but you have to be smart this time. This man wants you dead. Fuck, he wants all of us dead. We have to work to make sure at the end we’re standing over the son of a bitch and spitting on his grave. You feel me?”
“So where’s Carrie at now?” I ask before I can stop myself. It’s fucked up, I admit it. I’m mad at her, I blame her…well mostly, but I’m not exactly crazy happy she’s off somewhere with Bull either.
“Bull took her out to the safe house in Manchester.”
“Is that necessary?”
“She has been staying at the club, but the girl is pretty innocent and I have the Atlanta Charter coming in tomorrow for a few days…a big party.”
I don’t know what to say to that. Several things run through my head, but none of them I want to voice so, I let it go.
“This fucker got a real name?”
“Francis Owsley.”
“
Francis
? Jesus, no wonder the fucker is ripping off names from Greek mythology.”
Dragon laughs and I almost do too, except all this talk of Carrie has me feeling like I’m crawling out of my skin.
“He hasn’t made any moves since the day your woman was hurt?” It was tricky wording that question since bringing up Irish was bad, and saying Nicole and shot in the same sentence seemed to set Dragon off even more.
“Not a damn thing. He went underground as soon as we got his name. Something will give soon. I can feel it.”
I don’t roll my eyes, that shit would get
me
shot, plus I know from years of being in the service with Dragon that he has a pretty good sense for when things were about to get all fucked up. That means his surety that things are about to go to hell is bad, fucking bad.
“Well I better get back to the hotel,” I say getting up to leave.
“I expect your ass here tomorrow night,” Dragon orders and there’s no doubt that it is an order.
I grunt and walk out without giving him a solid answer.
Carrie
I
listen to
Lips, Dani, and Nic laugh, and I have to smile. I love these women. I’ve never had sisters, but since the first time I walked through the doors of the Savage MC almost four months ago, these girls have made me feel part of them. Nic and Dani are best friends and as different as night and day. Nicole is head over heels in love with Dragon and a complete fool could see that from miles off. Dani is hilarious and she makes you laugh. She seems to flirt with everyone, but I get the feeling men are the last thing on her mind. Lips is a club Twinkie (a woman all the brothers seemed to share), but she is different from the rest. I don’t really know how to explain it. She is just different. Of course the last month she has been dating Six exclusively. Six is a new member of the club. I’d heard the men refer to him as a prospect. He is funny and easy-going and he really seems to care for Lips. I’m hoping it works out for the two of them.
“I still don’t see why you can’t be at the party tomorrow,” Dani complains while sitting on the couch beside me. Her legs are folded and crossed under her. Nicole and Lips are in chairs across from the couch. Alexander, Bull and Six are sitting at the kitchen table talking quietly to each other, but every time I glance up they are watching us. It is unnerving, but after having the club watch over me for the last two months, I am slowly getting used to it.
Dragon had his men come get me after the car accident. Nicole and Dani were hurt and recovering. Dragon seemed to think it was the same man after me. Maybe the three of us bonded over that, I don’t know. I just appreciated the way they made me feel like part of a family instead of an outsider. After what I had lost, it was a welcomed feeling.
“She’s not going,” Bull speaks up and I turn to look at him.
We haven’t talked since he kissed me. That wasn’t unusual, Bull doesn’t talk. This morning at the hotel was definitely not his norm.
“Why can’t I go?” I ask confused. Maybe the club is tired of having me around?
“Red, some things are better not asked,” Bull says and turns back to his brothers effectively dismissing me. I want to be assertive and demand to know the real reason, but I’m just not that person and it sucks.
“It’s because of the Atlanta chapter. Last time they were here, the place was rowdy. They’re protecting you,” Nicole offers, putting her hand on mine.
I look up at her. She is beautiful. She has these blue eyes that just light up a room. Her hair is a golden blonde and has grown longer since I’ve met her. She is wearing these black leggings with matching high-heeled boots and a long burnt orange sweater. I almost feel dowdy next to her—to all of these women really. Dani is like a runway model, tall, skinny, perfect bone structure and this dark chestnut hair that is long, silky-smooth and gorgeous. Lips, whose name is actually Vida, is just as gorgeous. Her dark skin looks like warm, creamy coffee and her hair is long with purple color woven in. You’d think it was black until the light hits and you have to do a double take. They are all dressed kind of like Nicole, casual to be sure—but totally different from my faded blue jeans and baby pink t-shirt. My hair is pulled up high in a pony-tail and I spent the morning taming my curls and straightening them. Whereas, all the women around me have on makeup, I hadn’t bothered. I seldom do. It just seems too much effort. If I made myself up and wore more stylish clothes, would Jacob notice me more then? I hold in my groan. It doesn’t matter what I do, Jacob will never notice or care. Well, unless I died. He might notice then. At least long enough to celebrate.
“Earth to Carrie!” Lips says and I smile.
“Sorry, was just thinking.”
“I mean it honey. It’s not you. The men love you. They’re trying to protect you from the party and everything that goes on,” Nicole reiterates.
“I know,” I say quietly, but out loud this time. “I don’t understand why, I mean I know what sex is,” I grumble and curse at the way my cheeks fill with heat.
“I’m with carrot top,” Dani adds in. I hate that nickname, but I let her do it. Dani seems cold-hearted at times, but I think she has a lot going on inside of her. I’m horribly shy, so I’ve done a lot of people watching over the years. I honestly think that Dani uses being outspoken as a defense. I wonder if anyone has ever seen the real her? I’m not even sure she’s shown Nicole.
“You’re not going, Red.”
I hear Bull over my shoulder and I screw up my face mocking his dour look I know he has right now. I don’t need to look to know it’s there. The girls automatically start laughing and I join in, but quieter.
“Have you and Dragon set a date yet?” I ask because I know they’ve been talking about it and I’m anxious to get the conversation off of me.
“We were hoping for Valentine’s Day, but that’s not going to happen,” she says her face hid behind her hair. She’s looking down at one of her nails like it holds the secrets of the universe.
“Why not?” I ask.
“Dragon’s being a jerk,” she grumbles.
“What do you mean?” I ask confused, because I’ve seen them together and he seems to dote on her.
“He won’t ask his men to wear monkey suits,” Dani explained.
“It’s just for one day. I don’t see what the big damn deal is! I mean really, I’m pledging my troth to the big dummy!” Nicole complains.
Dani busts out laughing and it’s so hard that she’s snorting. Eventually, we all join in.
“What the fuck is a troth anyways?” Dani asks wiping tears from her face when we finally stop.
“It’s like you’re pledging your loyalty,” I explain with a grin.
“It sounds like something you hold for a pig to eat out of,” Nicole says with a giggle.
“You could always let him eat you and get him to agree to the suits while he’s busy with other things on his mind,” Dani says sagely.
“Um… if Dragon is going down on me the last thing I’m going to be thinking about is other fucking men and what they’re wearing,” Nicole explains.
“Maybe you can compromise,” I suggest, blushing, because her words immediately bring to mind a picture, but it’s not her and Dragon I see. No, it’s me and Jacob and my body instantly reacts.
“Compromise?” Nicole asks and I look down because I’m afraid she can see the fact that I’m thinking of Jacob. Realistically I know she can’t, but still…
“Yeah, have them wear black slacks or something with a dress shirt.”
“I personally think a man looks sexy in a suit,” Lips grins and her eyes lock over at the table. I look up and see Six giving her a knowing smile. It’s a look a couple gives each other when they are close. I want that. I’ve only read about it in books and seen it between my parents and now among my new friends. I don’t think I’ll ever have that. I want it, but being totally real, I can’t see me getting it with Jacob and I can’t see myself opening up to anyone else. Maybe someday, but I am starting to really doubt that. If a man can hate you and you still want him, there’s not much else you can do.
I must have sighed aloud, I don’t know but I sense the change of vibe with the girls around me.