Say You Want Me (10 page)

I look at him, waiting for some kind of explanation, but he just watches me. I see something in his eyes then. It’s there, but it’s guarded. That knowing feeling sits heavy in my gut as I wonder if I imagined it. Could we both be starting to feel something more?

I don’t want him to fall in love with me.

I don’t want to want him.

I want for us to be friends.

I want to
not
fall in love with him.

But there’s a very good chance I’m not going to be able to stop it.

Mrs. Hennington clears her throat, breaking the trance. “Have you considered what we talked about, Angie?”

What we talked about? I scramble through the conversations we’ve had and finally land on what she’s talking about.

The bakery.

“I just don’t think it would be right.” I shake my head. “I would really feel terrible when I have to go back to Philly.”

“I’m sure Becca could use the help,” Macie says, handing me a piece of pie. “With being short staffed and all, she’s a bit overwhelmed. Even if it’s only while you’re here.”

I want to help. It would be great to have something to do back in the bakery, but I don’t know if I should. Why put down roots when I’m not planning to let the tree grow? My mind goes back and forth over the pros and cons and if I were to take her up on her offer it will give Wyatt false hope.

“Oh, I would love some help,” Mrs. Kannan says with a smile. “Especially with the festival and the weddings I have comin’ up.”

“I’m honestly not sure that I would be much help, Mrs. Kannan. By the time I got the lay of the shop, I’d be leaving. It wouldn’t be right.”

Mrs. Kannan and Mrs. Hennington share a look. I’m not too sure what they’re conveying, but I’m wishing that it’s in support to let it drop. “I understand, but I sure hope you change your mind.”

Crisis averted.

We talk a little more, and Wyatt sits next to me with a grin. He looks confident, as if everything is going according to plan. It makes me wonder what else he has up his sleeve. So far, the first two weeks have been almost too easy. We’ve laughed, had tons of dates, had a pretty fantastic kiss, and gotten along great. If things continue at this rate, in a few months, I’m going to have a hard time convincing myself to go back to Philly.

And that would be a bad thing.

W
YATT TAKES MY HAND AS
we walk back to our house, and I let him. It feels comfortable, which leaves a very uncomfortable feeling in my chest. It shouldn’t be as easy as it is. I’ve never liked guys who were touchy-feely, and it makes me wonder why with Wyatt I almost crave it.

Is it because he’s so sweet? Is it because this is how it’s meant to be? I don’t know about any of this, and Presley is no help. She just smiles when I explain how I feel. It makes no sense that I actually
like
him as much as I do in such a short amount of time.

We continue down the path, and I admire the set up the Hennington’s have. They all live on the same piece of land, but they’re not on top of each other. His parents live in what he calls the main house. I call it a freaking mansion. Trent, Wyatt, and Zach all have homes on the property, but Zach’s original place is no longer occupied since he and Presley built their own home.

“Hey,” I say, stopping dead in my tracks. “Why am I staying with you in your house when Zach’s house is empty?”

“Because it’s not where you belong.” Wyatt stands in front of me, and I remove my hand from his.

That makes no sense. He wants me here, but he could at least let me have my own space. I’m kind of pissed at him . . . and Presley. Neither of them thought about how much I would maybe need some separation. “Why? Why would you do that?”

“Where is this coming from? You never said a word when we were makin’ arrangements. So why are you suddenly pissed?”

“I don’t know, but I am.” Probably because I didn’t think of it sooner, which isn’t the damn point. “You never gave me a choice. You said I would move here and stay with you. It was decided for me. I still could’ve gotten to know you while living down the road.”

“No,” Wyatt says with finality.

“No?”

“No. You were staying with me. It wasn’t mentioned because it wasn’t an option.”

My mouth falls open. “And why not?”

“Because you’re pregnant and you gave me limited time. You’re exactly where I need you.”

Once again, he renders me speechless. Where he
needs
me? What does that even mean? I start to think back to some of the comments he’s made and try to decipher any hidden meanings. Wyatt didn’t protest after he got over his shock. He went into “man mode” and wanted to fix it all. I chalked it up to him being a good guy and wanting to take care of me, but I wonder if there’s more. “So that’s all I am?” I ask. “I’m just the girl you got pregnant who needs you to take care of her? This is why you went all commando and tried to tell me we were getting married?” I shoot the questions off in rapid fire.

“No!” He steps forward. “Maybe when you first said that you were pregnant, my mind went there. But shit, Ang. We’re not kids, and this isn’t something new between us. I don’t understand why you won’t see that you’re not some obligation. I like you. I like bein’ around you. I didn’t offer Zach’s place, because I wanted you close to me. I wanted to see if we were more two years ago, but neither of us were going to move, so I let it go. Why won’t you put down your guard?”

Because once upon a time when I believed in fairy tales, I
was
the girl who wanted to be married and have a family. I believed that it would happen, yet it never seemed right. No man seemed worthy of my time. No prince ever showed up, and I learned the hard way that a lot of men would treat me like shit, so I let go of that stupid dream and lived in reality. I built my own damn castle with really high walls. It was a fortress, sturdy enough to ensure I could never be hurt. Now, here Wyatt is with his cannon, finding ways to break my armor. He’s finding cracks in the foundation, and I have to stop him.

That girl can’t be uncovered.

That girl is stupid.

That girl will get her heart broken because this man only wants her because she’s pregnant.

“Because . . .” I trail off. “You’re . . . such an . . . Ugh! I don’t even know!”

Wyatt steps forward, and I have to lean back to see his eyes. The sun is setting behind me, shining on his face, and the way he looks at me . . . leaves me breathless. It’s as if I’m the center of his world. It reminds me of how Zach looks at Presley. “I’m doing what’s right. You can call me whatever you want. But you’re pregnant with my baby, and that means I’m takin’ care of you.”

“I’m completely capable of taking care of myself. I’ve been alone and been perfectly fine.”

“It means you belong with me,” he carries on as if I haven’t spoken. “I’m gettin’ pretty tired of explaining this to you. I’ve made it clear to you that I want to make whatever this is work. You’re so hell bent on doin’ this on your own that you won’t even see anything else. If I gave you space, it would solidify your point that you should stay away. You can do this on your own, I know that. But why would you want to? Why are you so adamant about being alone? Why won’t you see that there’s a whole lot of people who want to be a part of your life?”

“Because it never stays that way!” I yell and cup my hand over my mouth. A tear falls from my eyes as the truth comes out.

And there it is.

In my heart, I know why. He’s the kind of guy I want to want me. He’s strong, sexy, caring, and so much more. There are layers to Wyatt, and I want to peel back each one of them. It was why I kept finding ways to be around him when I visited. It was why I practically jumped at the chance to sleep with him. Because Wyatt makes me feel alive. He’s excavated the parts of me I’ve buried under sarcasm and attitude, the girl who wants a man to love her.

But fairy tales don’t come true.

People die.

And I’m destined to be forgotten.

Wyatt’s thumb brushes the tear away. “You’ve been through a lot of shit, but you haven’t actually dealt with it, have you?”

I shake my head. “No, you don’t get it, Wyatt. I’m happy. I’m genuinely happy alone. I like my life, my job, my apartment, and now everything is changing. I’ve kept things exactly the same because they work that way!” Another tear falls. “I don’t want to like you. But you’re making it impossible. You’re going to realize I’m a giant pain in the ass. I’m stubborn, and I won’t give up my life for a man. I can’t do it. Because when you do realize I’m not worth the effort—You’ll go.”

“I’m not leavin’ you. I’m not leavin’ my kid. You’re going to have to get used to that.”

“You don’t know that. You can’t possibly know that.”

He pulls me against his chest and holds me there. My fingers grip his shirt, and I hold on. I want to believe that he means it. But I’ve never had a guy stick it out with me. I’m moody, more so with a kid wreaking havoc on my hormones. There are girls like Presley who have epic loves, then there is me. I’m not the type of girl guys love. I’m the type they fuck and move on from. I’ve been fine with that. Happy even.

Wyatt lets out a deep sigh. “I’ll prove it.”

I sure hope so, because I could use a Prince Charming rather than the frogs I’ve been kissing.

We make it the rest of the way home without anymore outbursts. I mull over everything he said and try to put it into categories.

The reasons why I should keep myself guarded.

There’s all the pros of why I think Wyatt is great, which is slowly making the former column damn near obsolete.

My world has pretty much been flipped around, so it’s likely I’m a little off my game. Normally by now, I’d have found a hundred reasons why he’s the last man on earth I want to be with. It doesn’t usually take long. I find things annoying pretty quickly, but that list . . . is tiny.

Sure he is too damn sweet, he doesn’t really cook much, and he seems to have issues with leaving the toilet seat up, but that’s about it. I genuinely like being around him, and I find ways throughout the day to see him.

We both seem to be lost in our own minds as we muddle around the house. I get changed, he puts some things away, and we both climb into bed.

“Wyatt?”

“Hmm?”

“If I wasn’t having the baby, would you still want me?”

His body goes still and then I feel him move quickly. The light turns on, and he stares at me. “Why would you ask me that?”

“There’s these things I wonder about,” I admit. “It’s why I keep holding myself back. One of them is how you feel about Presley, the baby, and then where I fit into all that.”

It’s an honest question, but I don’t know why I’m asking it. I just know if I don’t, it’s going to eat me alive. Wyatt and I have spent the last two weeks being open, getting to know each other, and talking about almost everything. My feelings are growing stronger with each day that passes, but the worry that my feelings are because of the baby won’t go away.

“I don’t know what I would feel. I liked you a long time ago, but we had our separate lives, Ang. I do know that we
are
having a baby, and I care about you. I don’t think there’s a real way to answer that.”

I know what he means, but if there were no baby, would we even be having this conversation? The answer is no. The baby is the reason I’m here. The baby is the reason all this is happening. Wyatt and I might have hooked up whenever I came for a visit. Maybe we would’ve spent a few hot and heavy nights together, but I would’ve gone back to Philly.

To my life.

He would’ve stayed here—where he belongs.

“Let me ask you a question,” Wyatt says. “Why did you agree to come here?”

“Because you asked.”

“No.” He sits up. “That’s bullshit.”

“No, it’s the answer.”

He releases a sarcastic laugh. “Why did you agree?”

“I told you!” Now, I’m getting frustrated.

“Was it because you wanted to see what this was? Was it because you wanted to know me better? Why, Angie? Why come here? Why would you give up three months of your life?”

The pit in my stomach grows. “Because!” I sit up, anger and confusion flowing through me. Why is he pushing me so hard?

Wyatt doesn’t stop. “What was your goal? Why would you change your entire world and come here? Just like you have fears, I got them too. I’m trying to get you to see that I’m not playin’ around. I’m giving you all I got, and you’re holding back.”

“I’m scared.”

“I am too, baby. I’m livin’ with knowing you’re packed up and gone with my kid in a few months. I’m going to make you see that what you’re willing to give up is more than what you got back home. I’m doing my damn best to ensure you see who I am. I don’t know if we’d be doing this if you weren’t pregnant. Hell, I know we wouldn’t.” He lets out a laugh devoid of all humor. “We’re both stubborn assholes, and we’d let that game play on for years. We don’t have years. We’re running on borrowed time.”

“Exactly! Without the baby, there would be no us! This is my whole damn point.”

It’s what keeps me holding back. Neither of us would move for the other. Not for the kind of feelings we had. Wyatt and I were dynamite in bed, but outside of that, we didn’t talk much.