Authors: Latika Sharma
“I . . . I . . . really did not pay attention . . . to what went in my mouth . . . I . . . just . . .” For once Anjali was lost for words.
“Sorry Kabir!” I looked at him. There was nothing that came in my mind as well. I looked from his empty box to our filled one, nestled in his hand. We had almost finished his sandwiches.
“Hmm . . . I was not going to ask for a bite though Anjali!” Kabir was rubbing her nose into it.
“Still . . . you can eat these too now!” He handed her, her box. Anjali took it reluctantly and looked outside the window. I stood up.
“Kabir she is sorry you know . . . please don’t be hard on her!” I tried to diffuse the situation.
“Sure. I was just being mean to her intentionally. It’s not every day that we can catch Anjali with her foot in her mouth . . . besides . . . there is a bit of something on you . . . here . . . I cleaned it!” Kabir wiped a crumb off effortlessly from the corner of my mouth. I just stood there, electrified by his touch. What was wrong with him? Din’t he care at all that there were others around us, watching us like hawks!
I noticed that Anjali had not seen this little display. I sat down beside her, quietly resuming my book from where I had left it.
“Let go of it Anjali, and please learn to be a bit more friendly! He is a good boy, really and you too can mess up at times. It is never good to be that estranged with anyone. You never know who you would need in life.” I placed my hand on hers.
Someone in the back row began singing.
“Kabir, your turn to sing now!!” Madhuri spoke with pure joy in her voice.
“Oh yes . . . go ahead Kabby!” Dev insisted. Kabir took his time.
“But what should I sing?” He was relishing his spot light. All the girls were obviously over the moon just sitting next to him he was wearing sharp royal blue jeans with a high neck black sweater. He wore a smart black wrist watch and his hair was gelled, rather smartly. He wore simple black sneakers that surprisingly looked dashing on his feet. His perfume or cologne, whatever brand it was, did wonders to a girl’s imagination.
“C’mon. Sing now Kabir . . . ok here it is . . .” Ayesha had finally used a bit of her brains. “You must sing the song you would to impress your girlfriend!” Ayesha definitely was playing her cards smoothly.
I did not turn around, but my ears were glued to what would pour out of his mouth now. It must be said, I was not having that high an opinion of Dev and his guitar playing abilities as he claimed. But I totally did not expect Kabir to be a singer! Because I was shell shocked when I heard him serenade Brian Adams . . . imagine! In a time when people sang nothing but Shah Rukh Khan Songs, Kabby went ahead to sing Brian Adam’s old classic song, “Everything I do I do it for you.”
“Well . . . he’s good isn’t he?” I turned towards Anjali. I was hoping to cheer her up as she had been sulking for a while now.
“Yeah! I bet Ayesha is swooning over him!” Anjali looked at me finally seeing something besides her novel. She was reading the Edward Cullen series now. We called it that intentionally.
“Let’s look at the fun then, come . . . get up, and lets count how many birds did Kabir Sharma, shoot with his one song arrow!” I pulled Anjali up on her feet and turned around. The sight left me breathless.
Riya sucked in air as she lay on her bed, alone. Her husband was to return from work in two days, he was out on business, something he did frequently. But this was going to be his final project. Then, he had promised to spend time with Riya and Raibir.
The expression on Kabir’s face was intense. He was serenading and all the girls were looking at him. Dev was sitting proudly next to him. It wasn’t long before Kabir had gotten up and slowly walked towards me and stood next to me. I did not realise it when he did it, but surely he grazed my hand and that was when he turned towards me and completed his song . . . ‘I do it for you’.
He had paused for a few seconds and my heart stopped beating as well in those few minutes. It began beating again as he smiled meaningfully, touched my hand properly and left for his gang again. No one knew what passed between us, yet my life had taken its first turn towards change, towards the man I would fall in love with and love with a madness unquoted by anyone, towards my destiny.
My heart has played his song ever since . . .
“W
here is the hot water tap?”
“My bed had no quilts!!”
“Let me dress up first! Move aside, you are standing right in front of the mirror!”
The resort staffs were running from end to end to meet the requirements of us demanding city children. All of us were now in our rooms and the fanfare was to begin soon. Despite the long and almost giddy bus ride to the destination, none felt tired at all. Rather every room had girls and boys dressing up for the evening dinner and dance.
I must mention about boys here. What I always thought was that it was us girls who stood in front of mirror making poses and stances to evaluate how we looked. We were the ones wondering if this dress would catch the attention of that someone special or if this lip gloss would accentuate my assets. But . . . boys were equally conscious, if not more. I could make out guys hurdling and tossing one shirt after the next in an attempt to be the perfect Mr. Grasim International or something like that! Thetenacity with which they shaped their manes was absolute joy to see!
“If he did that with his book just twice in a week, he would beat us all in studies.” I reacted to Dev trying to set his electric look again.
Not to mention that I too was rather conscious tonight, Kabir would be there, and for the first time in my life I was confused at what to wear.
“Just put on anything Riya. You look good in every attire.” Anjali spoke after I asked for her suggestion.
“Still, pick something for me! I am blank tonight!” I replied.
“Ok then, lemme see what all you have . . .” And Anjali swiftly went through my luggage and selected one item for me, which I happily put on.
The dinner was simple and none of us bothered to relish it as all were too hungry to stop and ponder that the vegetables were a bit too fried and the egg curry had a tiny bit more salt. The food was consumed before the staff could replenish the empty chaffing dishes.
The teachers were a bit relaxed too. It was a treat to watch Ms. Payal Suri in jeans. She looked just like us! Most boys were spell bound when she had walked into the lounge! She was obviously enjoying all the mesmerised glances. And even the strict Ms. Gayatri, our biology teacher, looked very smart in her trousers and a crisp white office shirt with an overcoat.
After the dinner it was time to rock n roll! The bon fire was outside the cabin huts and all of us were gathered there. Winters in a rural area are not only cold, they are icy! A gentle breeze can make one shiver to the bones.
“Your hands are shivering,” I heard a sudden voice behind me. I knew it was him.
“Yes. I feel the cold more.” I replied without facing him.
“Hmm . . . you must wear gloves then.” He spoke. I knew he was close to me; I could feel his presence and inhale his cologne.
“Perhaps later . . .” I replied, my heart had picked up pace and I had completely gone numb to the cold air.
“In the meantime, let me help.”
Without waiting for me to react, Kabir placed his hands, warm and soft, on mine and encapsulated my tiny hands completely.
We stood there, holding hands for the longest time. I was facing him and he stood tall in front of me. The light from the bonfire was crackling and reflecting in splashes across his clean and washed face. I knew he was breathing fast too.
“Kab . . . bi.iir!” I was fumbling! My god! Was this the impact of his holding my hand? I was too embarrassed to utter anything more. What was happening? This was the same boy who borrowed my notes!
“What?” he was calm as a swan, or too good at hiding his tremors.
I just could not stand his love struck gaze anymore. There was so much ecstasy and emotion in those eyes. I was shaking! My legs would give way any minute; I knew it and this fear gripped me.
“I . . . I . . . have . . . to . . . go . . .” I tried to release my hand from his grasp, but he would not let go. He was savouring the moment.
“Hmm . . . my flightless bird!” I looked up at him. He had always called me that. But today, it sounded different. It sounded . . . passionate, dreamy, a lover’s enchantment.
I pulled my hand forcefully and fled.
It took me a long while to steady my nerves again. I returned back to where Anjali was sitting.
“Where were you? And . . . Riya, what is the matter? You look pale!” Anjali was quick to notice.
“I’m fine.” I replied, not looking at her. Anjali did not reply, she knew something had happened and I was just not discussing it.
It was then that Kabir joined us. He looked at me and Anjali could see the same look on his face. I need not mention again how smart the girl was, as it took her no time to link those two expressions.
“Want to dance?” Kabir extended his hand towards me.
“No! I’m . . . not . . . in the mood!” I did not even look up at him. Every girl was watching us and hating my guts for being the one Kabir choose to dance with. But they were equally amazed at my nerve and foolishness for refusing.
“You sure . . . Riya?” Kabir asked again. My stomach did a somersault when I heard my name from his lips, there was a magical jingle to it.
I simply nodded my head in denial.
He went ahead and danced with every girl in the garden! Ayesha was the lucky one; she got to stick to him as much as she pleased. It was rather irritating and I was sulking inwardly. I don’t know why but seeing him laugh at their jokes was driving me mad with anger! I knew he was doing this intentionally! What was he expecting from me? He surely did not expect me to have danced with him like that in front of everyone! Especially when people already called us a couple! Yet . . . he was deliberately infuriating me and making all those moves!
“Stop fretting Riya, we all know why he is doing it!” Anjali must have seen the stroppy look on my face.
“Well . . . who does he think he is anyway? And what do you mean he is doing it to bother me? I can dance if I wish to . . . I just don’t feel like it!” I knew I was behaving as if caught with my hand in the cookie jar, but I was not thinking, I was just watching that Ayesha run her hands on his arm.
“Ahmm.” Anjali’s monosyllabic replies meant more than many lectures at times. They hit home effectively.
I don’t know what came over me, but I got up and with determined steps like a soldier walked up to a bunch of boys and asked rather huffily, “Care for a dance? No is not an option . . . COME NOW!” and I extended my hand, adamantly.
I was told later, that Kabir had stopped dead in his tracks when he had seen me on the dance floor. He was rooted on his spot, burnt with rage and boiling temper when he had seen me dance, and that too with none other than Tejas Ahluwalia. Dev had to pull him away from the crowd after I had laughed on one of Tejas’s jokes.
My revenge was taken. Sometimes all it takes is one shot, to kill the mocking bird!
I
am tempted to say that I had not the faintest idea why I asked Tejas Ahluwalia, Kabir’s rival for the dance. Even Joy would have seen the white lie. I knew why I did it. It was as clear as water.
“Let’s go from here.” Dev pulled Kabir’s shaking body away from the bon fire site. Anjali saw him drag Kabir to a different area of the resort. Kabir had turned once or twice to see if I was still flirting around with Tejas. And then no one saw him the whole night, up until the sleep time.
“Riya! Did you see his face? I think he was drunk!” Anjali was speaking as we both changed and slipped on to our beds. The weather was cold now and we were bone tired. My eyes were drooping with fatigue and the call of slumber. I barely heard her.
“Yeah! Suits him.” I yawned and pulled the blanket up till my chin.
“But Riya . . . why did you do that?” Anjali was obviously more awake than me.
“Sleep please, Anjali. . . will . . . tell . . . later . . . nite’!” I must have dosed off mid-sentence.
I think it was the chill that woke me up in the middle of the night. I must have remained drowsy for a while as I looked around for my blanket. It was there all right, encircling my warm body.
Then what had woken me?
I was about to switch off my bed side lamp when I heard it. There was a light tap on the door.
I saw Anjali snoring lightly by my side, her tiny body moving rhythmically in slow waves. Deep sleep, I said to myself.
Then it was there again, a tapping followed by a bang, I think I heard someone call my name as well.
Gingerly, but too anxious for sleep now, I walked softly to door and turned the knob slowly peeping outside in the darkness.
“Who is it?” I said. A part of me was still asleep, it was 4:00 in the morning and I was still very tired. But the other half was wide awake and a bit scared as well.
“Riya. It’s me, Kabir.”
“What? Kabby? What are you doing? Do you know it’s . . .” I looked at my empty wrist.
“I know. Its 4:00 in the morning. I could not sleep. I had to see you Riya.” “Why? What’s wrong?” I was a bit tensed now.
“First you put on your shawl. It’s very cold outside. Here, let me help.” With that Kabir covered me with his own shawl.
“Why? What . . . Kabir . . I don’t understand, why are you here now?” I was completely in senses now. Some thing was not right; I could see his face in the night lamp outside my cottage.
“I am here now because you did not leave me . . .” Kabir took his time, but when he spoke he was firm.
“What? I was . . . I did not even see you after the . . .” I was hesitant, cognisant of what I had done.
“Exactly. You did not see me, but all I did was see you! You were with me when Dev dragged me away. I tried, but I could not get that image of you dancing with Tejas out of my head! Why Riya? Why can’t I get you out of my head?” Kabir looked so childlike, I was lost for words. I looked down at my hands.