Scoundrel (34 page)

“You have my word that I will not treat this marriage as a sham,” he said at last.

Lily frowned. “You needn’t play at devotion, or even pretend to love me. If nothing else, I simply hoped you would respect our friendship enough that you could give me your loyalty.”

He looked into her eyes, his expression grim. “You have my loyalty.”

“I don’t think we are talking about the same thing.”

“Yes, I think we are. I intend to be faithful to you, Lily. I will not betray the vows we made today.”

He made that pledge of devotion without touching her, without revealing any emotion at all. The reason finally dawned on her. She shook her head, thinking she must be wrong. “But you think I will?”

There was a slight tightening around the corners of his mouth, but he didn’t answer the question. He didn’t have to. “You don’t trust me.”

“Yes, Lily. I do.” He reached out and brushed a lock of her hair over one shoulder. “I’ve seen enough of your loyalty to know that even if your feelings for me change someday, you will remain faithful to your vows. That is one of the reasons I wanted to marry you. I see qualities in you that are rare beyond price, traits I value above all others.”

Touched by his speech, she still felt obliged to correct his mistake. “I know you didn’t want to marry me, Remmington. I’m not so vain that you need to lie to me and say that you did.”

One dark brow rose and the trace of a smile touched his lips. “Do you honestly believe I would give my name to a woman I didn’t want to marry?”

His words made her hope for too much. She tried to explain them away. “Well, perhaps you wanted to marry me because you felt it was your duty, but that is different than wanting to marry someone because… well, for the usual reasons. I know that duty and honor are very important to you.”

“Those are very good reasons.” He nodded a stern approval, and she knew he was teasing. “However, they aren’t the right ones. I think I knew this day would come from the moment we met, when I first looked into your eyes and saw the reflection of a man I hadn’t seen in a very long time.” His fingertips caressed the high curve of her cheek and he smiled. “You don’t have the slightest idea what I’m talking about, do you?”

Lily chewed on her lower lip and lifted her shoulders. “It sounds very nice.”

“The night you believe you lured me into this marriage, Lord Holybrook’s untimely arrival only made me realize that I wanted the right to speak with you anytime I pleased.” He lifted her hand and placed a gentle kiss in her palm, then another on her wrist. “I wanted the right to touch you, to hold you without a hundred eyes upon us.” She suddenly found herself on his lap, his arms wrapped around her, and she released a small, contented sigh. “And I wanted the freedom to kiss you without worrying that it would go too far.” He cradled her face in his hand and lowered her head until he spoke against her lips. “Indeed, with the hope that our kisses would go much farther.”

He didn’t tell her any more of his reasons for a very long time. Yet he told her everything she wanted to know with his kisses. They went on and on, dreamy, unhurried, as if he wanted nothing more than to kiss her forever. Then she shifted restlessly in his arms and his body went suddenly rigid. A little alarmed by the abrupt change, she leaned back to study his expression. “You look a bit… flushed.”

He made a sound deep in his throat that might have been a laugh. “You don’t know the half of it.” He studied her for a moment, as if looking for something in her eyes. “But I think you are ready for the next lesson.”

She gave him an indulgent smile. “Have you appointed yourself my tutor?”

“That has a very appealing ring to it.” His smile turned gentle as he removed the fragile bridal wreath from her hair and carefully set it aside, then he lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bed. He placed her in the center and stretched out next to her, drawing her down until they lay side by side, facing each other. “The first rule is that you must tell me everything you like, and anything you don’t.”

“I like puppies and I detest snakes.” She was trying her best to be lighthearted, hoping she could hide her nervousness and uncertainty about what would happen next.

As if he could read her mind, he pursed his lips and his expression turned thoughtful. “Did anyone tell you what would happen tonight? Lady Bainbridge, perhaps?”

Lily felt her cheeks bloom with color. She shook her head.

His thoughtful expression turned into a scowl. “Do you have
any
notion of what takes place between a husband and wife on their wedding night?”

She hadn’t thought it possible, but she felt her face turn even redder. “We spend considerable time in the country, and it’s almost impossible not to witness certain events that take place in the barnyard.” She made a face, then her gaze slid away from his. “I have the feeling this will be very embarrassing for both of us.”

She felt the bed shift as he rolled away from her. He lay on his back and stared at the ceiling, his hands laced together over his forehead. “I assumed someone would enlighten you, at least with the basic information.”

“I’m not completely ignorant. I’ve translated any number of Greek manuscripts, and certain love poems were… specific.” She bit her lip and her voice became a whisper. “Sophie’s cousin told her that it hurts a great deal the first time. Is that true?”

He turned to face her, drew her closer until her head rested against his shoulder. “I think I’m glad you saved your questions for me.” He began to stroke her back, soothing motions that encompassed the curve of her hip and waist. “Do you like the way you feel when we kiss?” He waited for her nod. “When we make love, it will involve many of the same feelings, only better.”

She gave him a dubious look.

He smiled back at her. “Do you remember how we like to touch when we kiss?”

“I am unlikely to forget.”

“I will want to touch and caress you when we kiss, and I hope you will want to return those caresses, to touch me just as intimately.”

“What do you mean by ‘intimately’?”

The corner of his mouth lifted and one eye narrowed as he considered his response. “You know, rather than explain everything before it happens, it might work better if you asked me questions along the way.”

“I’m not so sure. You haven’t told me yet if it hurts.”

“It might hurt at first,” he admitted, “but I will be very gentle, and I will tell you when that time comes so you won’t have to worry about it until then.” His expression softened. “Nothing we do will be frightening or unpleasant, Lily. I promise.”

She reached up and stroked his cheek, then smoothed her hand over his white silk cravat. “I have a feeling you are being very patient with me.”

Remmington thought he should receive an award. “I have a feeling the wait will be worthwhile.” He smiled and lifted her hand to press another kiss against her wrist. This time he teased the sensitive pulse point with the tip of his tongue. Lily sighed in response. She was so beautiful, so innocently sensual. She sighed again. The fabric at the front of her gown stretched enticingly over the soft swells of her breasts and he lost his train of thought.

“Should I put my nightgown on now?” She sat up and pulled several pins from her hair, sending a waterfall of fiery tresses over her shoulders and down to her waist.

Lying beside her, he propped his head up on one hand and reached for her hair with the other. He captured a thick strand and rubbed the silky stuff between his fingers, always amazed that it could be so soft. He knew her skin was softer.

She looked at him expectantly. “My nightgown?”

He shook his head. “You won’t need a nightgown tonight.”

Her eyes widened and she shivered. He couldn’t resist teasing her. “Cold?”

“No. Well, perhaps just a little.”

He smiled and opened his arms to her. “Come lie down with me, Lily.” He managed not to groan when she landed on his chest. His fingers brushed through her hair and found the small pearl buttons at the nape of her neck.

“What are you doing?”

“Loosening your gown. That high neckline looks uncomfortable.”

“It isn’t terribly uncomfortable. The bruises are almost gone.”

He frowned over that reminder. He unbuttoned the gown to her waist, then rolled her onto her back and carefully folded down the neckline of her gown. The bruises were no more than faint yellow marks that would disappear entirely in a few days. He stroked the elegant line of her throat with his fingertip, then he leaned down to do the same with his lips. “I won’t let him hurt you again, sweetheart.”

He’d promised to be gentle, and he showed her that consideration when he kissed her. She fit her mouth to his just as he’d taught her, then her tongue touched his and he forgot all about promises and consideration. The kiss deepened and he possessed her mouth completely. Even as he tightened his arms around her, he felt her body grow stiff. He knew instinctively that she wanted to give herself to him, that he was taking what she offered too quickly. He couldn’t help himself. His hips pressed against her soft body and his hand went instinctively to her breast, squeezing her until he heard her startled cry of alarm. In an abrupt movement, he tore his mouth away and rolled to his side. He lay on his back and gazed up at the ceiling, trying to calm his breathing. This patience business would take some getting used to.

She suddenly leaned over him, her hair spilling around them both, a curtain of firelight. “I was just a little nervous, I think. You aren’t going to stop kissing me, are you?”

He smiled and shook his head. She was every bit as passionate as he’d hoped. If he could keep his desire for her in check, the reward would be worth every moment of the torture. Her coaxing tone pleased him as well, and he decided to let her coax him a little more. “Are you warmer now?”

“Oh, yes. Much.”

“I’m very warm, too,” he said in a considering tone. “Would you mind helping me out of my jacket?”

The look she gave him was indulgent, one that said she saw through his game, but she nodded agreeably. He sat up and turned to one side as she slipped the jacket off his shoulders.

“I seem to recall loosening the buttons of your gown when you were uncomfortable.” He stripped off his cravat then ran a finger inside the collar of his shirt. “Perhaps you could return the favor. This shirt is extremely uncomfortable at the moment.”

Lily caught her lower lip between her teeth and reached for the top button. She undid the fastening very slowly, concentrating intently on the task. At the rate she was going, their wedding night would be over before she finished the long row of buttons. He untucked his shirt and began working on the bottom buttons, leaving her three in the middle. When the last button came undone, she held his shirt together by the edges. She hesitated and he tried to reassure her. “You saw me bare-chested that night in my town house. I’m no different now than I was then.”

“I know,” she whispered. “I’m just not certain I’m ready to see so much of you again.”

He wondered how she would react when she saw him naked. “Was the sight so ugly?”

She shook her head. “The sight was too tempting.”

He grasped her wrists and pulled her hands apart, opening the shirt, then he laid her hands against his chest. “I wanted you to touch me that night,” he admitted. “As much as I wanted to touch you. I wanted to explore your body with my hands. Is that what you found tempting?”

She stared at his chest with obvious longing. “Yes.”

He didn’t have to encourage her further. She removed the shirt by running her hands beneath the fabric, trailing her fingers over his chest to his stomach, then to his sides, up again to his shoulders until the shirt pooled onto the bed. His flesh burned everywhere she touched him. His hands moved to her gown and he caressed her shoulders and arms as he eased the gown to her waist. Only a delicate-looking chemise covered her breasts, and he took a moment to savor the sight.

His hands spanned her narrow waistline, and a smile began to tug at his lips. “I didn’t think you wore a corset.”

“I don’t wear one very often,” she admitted. “Do you mind?”

He shook his head as he reached for the straps of her chemise. A surge of modesty overcame her and she covered his hands, as if that small pressure might stop him. He placed his hands on top of hers, then closed them so her fingers curled around the small straps. His hands moved to her wrists to apply the gentlest pressure, urging her to lower the straps for him. He took over the task just below the curves of her shoulders, lowering the silk chemise in agonizingly slow degrees. She pulled her arms free of the straps, yet she made no move to cover herself.

For a moment he couldn’t help but stare, then he lifted her by the waist until she stood next to the bed. The gown and chemise fell in a pool of silk and satin at her feet. Then she did cover herself, her hair draped over her breasts, her arms crossed in an age-old gesture of maidenly modesty.

“Look at me, sweetheart.” The awe he felt lent a rough edge to his voice. Her eyes were dark with uncertainty when she met his gaze. He stroked her cheek with one finger, then reverently brushed her hair over her shoulders. “You are very beautiful, Lily. I would like to look at you.”

His gaze didn’t waver from her face as he waited for her permission. Very slowly, she lowered her arms to her sides. “I don’t feel especially beautiful right now. I just feel… naked.”