Season of Change (11 page)

S
ometimes I cry when I’m in church, when we sing or when the minister tells a story that touches me. I try not to let people see. This week, with everything going on, I was just a mess.

While I was in church, I said a prayer, feeling so thankful that Diana had been able to come and help me out last night. Grandma and Grandpa had been nice to me, and I was thankful for that, but I missed Daddy and Lynn and couldn’t wait to get home. I asked God to help me please make things easier for them.

After I said that prayer, I took a deep breath, and felt more peaceful.

As we were getting out of the car after church, suddenly, Diana said, “Grandpa and Grandma, I’m sorry about last night.” She closed the car door. “I know how irresponsible it was to take the car like that. I should’ve asked. It won’t happen again.”

Grandpa studied her as he put his car keys in his pocket, then put his hand on her shoulder. “I’m glad to hear you say that, young lady. You’ll still have to pay the consequences of your actions, but you are forgiven.” He smiled, and his eyes seemed full. “We only get angry because we love you so much.”

“I know.” Diana let him put his arm around her as we went up the wooden porch steps and into the house.

“That’s such a relief!” Grandma said, her eyes spark ling. She touched Diana’s arm. “Let’s have some lunch!”

Diana and I went upstairs to change out of our church clothes. I had worn an old sundress and let Diana borrow the new white sundress Mama had bought me yesterday, because it was the only one that fit her. Though it was just a little short.

“Thanks for the dress,” she said, handing it to me.

“Do you want it? It fits you.”

She considered. “No. If I go back to church, they’ll just have to put up with me in my blue jeans. But what
did you think of that story the minister told, about the boy who was burned?”

“It made me cry. Why?”

She shrugged. Had it touched her too?

After we set the table for Grandma, Diana warmed the goat’s milk, and I went out to the sun porch with her. Star struggled to her feet and tottered over to us.

“Maa!”

And then she licked my arm! Her little tongue was warm and smooth. “Hey, can I try giving the bottle to her?”

“Sure.” Diana handed me the bottle. “Just hold it up and kind of move it back and forth.”

I found I had to hold tight to the bottle. Star was so eager she almost pulled the bottle out of my hand. I pulled back on it, then gave it to her a little, then pulled back again.

“That’s good,” Diana said.

“Aww. Look,” I said. I watched the way her beautiful almond-shaped eyes closed as she drank. I stroked the edge of her pear-shaped ear, feeling the softness of her fur.

“Look at her face. Isn’t it beautiful?” Diana said.

“Yeah. Don’t you wish we could keep her?”

“Yeah.”

As Star finished the bottle, we laughed at the smeary places she had left on the windows by pressing her round nose to the glass.

“Come on, girls, time for lunch!” Grandma called.

We washed our hands and sat down with Grandma and Grandpa to a huge meal of salad, watermelon, and fried chicken that we’d picked up on the way home from church. When Grandpa suggested that we have a blessing, Diana joined hands without rolling her eyes the way she usually did. We bowed our heads. I was holding hands with Grandma on one side and Grandpa on the other.

“Dear Lord,” he said. “Thank you for the chance to spend time with our granddaughters and to share their lives.”

Warmth washed through me. He was calling me his granddaughter!

“Thank you for bringing Diana and Stephanie back safe to us last night. Help us to find a home for that little fawn. Thank you for this wonderful meal before us. For these and all our many blessings, amen.”

“Amen,” Grandma and I repeated. Grandma squeezed my hand.

And then, a second later, Diana said, “Amen.”

If Grandma and Grandpa noticed, they didn’t say anything.

“Well, we’ll address the consequences for last night
when your parents get here,” Grandpa said as he passed the watermelon. “Meanwhile, it’s a beautiful day for kneeboarding. Stephanie, want to give it another try?”

Diana grinned at me. “Sure she does, Grandpa! You were so close, Steph, you can’t give up!”

My heart beat hard a few times. No, I didn’t want to give up. Besides, Daddy would be proud of me if I told him I could kneeboard. “Okay!” I said. “I’ll try again.”

“That’s what I like to hear!” Grandpa said, clapping his hands together. “I’ll go down and get the boat ready after lunch.”

“Diana, do you want to invite your friend Noah over to ski this afternoon since he rushed off without getting a chance to yesterday?” Grandma asked.

“Oh, no, that’s okay,” Diana said quickly, with a quick glance at me.

After lunch, while we were helping Grandma clean up, Grandpa went down to the dock to get the boat ready, but was back within a few minutes.

“Come down and look!” he said, cracking the screen door and popping his head in.

“What? What?” said Grandma.

“I’m not going to tell you, you have to come see for yourself,” Grandpa said. “Hurry up!”

“Oh, I know, I know what it is! Oh, my, come on girls, let’s go!” Grandma’s voice got high and excited as she untied her apron and tossed it on the counter.

“Hurry up!” said Grandpa.

We dropped our dish towels and all followed Grandpa down through the back yard to the dock. And there, on the pontoon boat cover, sat the mother goose, and peeking from underneath her breast was one puffy little yellowish gray gosling, cheeping with all its might. The mother gazed at us with beady black eyes, a broad chest and obvious pride.

“Shhh! Don’t scare her!” Grandpa said. “Stay back.”

Small pieces of the broken eggs surrounded the mother. Just behind the mother, two more goslings struggled to get themselves hatched. The tops of the eggs were gone and they strained with their necks and wings to wiggle free. Their feathers were wet and slick against their tiny heads and stumpy wings. Their cheeping was constant, like a soft whistling.

“Will you look at that?” Grandma said. “Look what hard work it is to get hatched!” She and Grandpa stood and watched, holding hands. Not far away, the father goose swam around, peering at his newborn family and calling to them.

We were transfixed while the fluffy one cheeped at its mother and the other two gradually wiggled out of their eggs. The mother stood up, flapping her wings, and we saw four more broken eggs underneath her, all with little wet heads making their way out.

“Seven little goslings!” Grandpa said.

The mother nosed the babies with her beak, as if checking on them and counting.

“Like a miracle!” said Grandma.

We decided to give the geese some privacy, so, not long afterward, we took the boat out on the choppy water. Diana helped me with the clasps on the ski vest. Grandpa, at the wheel of the boat, turned toward us.

“Okay, Miss Stephanie, you’re going to get up this time,” he said. “Everything’s going to come together.”

“Yeah, it’s going to be great!” Diana said.

“I hope so!” Taking a deep breath, I dove in, the cool water soothing on my hot skin. The sun reflected in bright prisms from the surface of the water, making the water look as though it was sprinkled with glitter.

I treaded water while Diana tossed the kneeboard to me, letting it skim across the surface, and then threw me the ski rope.

“Remember what to do?” Diana yelled.

“I think so!” I placed my fingers carefully on the handle.

Grandpa gave the boat a little gas to put tension in the ski rope. “Ready?”

“Ready!”

He hit the throttle and the boat took off. I centered my body on the board, then got one knee, then the
other, in place. The board felt slippery underneath me, but I managed not to fall. Slowly, I let myself straighten up.

“Lean back!” Diana shouted.

I did, carefully, without disturbing my balance. And all of a sudden, I was kneeboarding! The water flew by at breakneck speed. The air blew into me and rushed past. I held onto the rope, my hair flying out behind me, feeling the pull in my arms.

“Ya-hoo! “Diana yelled, holding both thumbs way up.

“Way to go!” yelled Grandpa.

“Whoo-hoo!” I was flying along with this gigantic grin on my face!

I held on for dear life, keeping my eye on the boat ahead of me. Gradually I relaxed a little bit, and started looking around, at the wake unfurling beside me, at the glittering water, at the blue sky, and the houses and docks flashing by.

I was really kneeboarding! I drew a deep breath of satisfaction.

Should I try to cross the wake? The water behind the boat was churned up but the water on the other side of the wake was smooth.

I decided to try.

I pulled the ski rope to the right and leaned slightly right. I inched closer to the wake. I leaned a little more, and soon was next to it. It churned along, a roiling
hump or wave, on both sides behind the boat, like a “v.”

I leaned to the right just a little more, to see if I could slide over it and bam! The board slid out from under me and I wiped out, face-first in the water.

I came up, my face stinging, as the rope went skittering away.

The boat immediately began to circle back for me. I treaded water, realizing just how tired and shaky my arms were.

“Want to go again?” Grandpa asked as he drove up.

I shook my head. “I’ll come in.”

“Good try.” Diana helped me climb up the ladder into the back of the boat.

“I was trying to cross the wake.” I collapsed, water streaming everywhere, into one of the back seats, taking off the ski vest.

“Yeah, we could tell. You’ll get the hang of that next time.”

“The important thing is you were up!” Grandpa held his hand out to give me a high five. “Way to go!”

“I know!” I grinned at him, feeling dizzy with success.

After that, I wrapped myself in a big towel and let the sun warm my hair and face while I watched Diana kneeboard and then slalom ski. She zipped across the wake, out beside the boat, and then boomeranged back
around to the other side of the boat. She even did a three-sixty, showing off for me and Grandpa.

Finally, she clambered back into the boat, dripping and out of breath, and she dropped into the other back seat. “Whoo! That was awesome!”

“Good job, Diana,” Grandpa said, as he turned the wheel, heading back for home. “Hey, looks like somebody is standing out on our dock. And it’s not Grandma.”

Diana and I looked over and sure enough, someone was standing there. He wore blue striped board shorts and held a black wakeboard.

Diana’s mouth dropped open.

O
h man, what was Noah doing here? I thought about yesterday and felt my cheeks go hot.

Grandpa cut the motor so we wouldn’t disturb the mother goose and her goslings, and we glided up next to the dock.

“Caramba!” Noah said.

I started laughing.

“You invited me to come back and wakeboard, so I thought I’d take you up on it.” Noah held up his wakeboard.

“Come aboard!” Grandpa said.

Noah handed Stephanie his wakeboard and I grabbed his hand as he climbed on board. It felt electric when our hands touched. I tried to read his eyes, feeling a little breathless.

“It looks like you have some baby geese there on top of your pontoon boat!” Noah said.

“How about that, isn’t that great?” Grandpa said. “Wow, that’s a serious wakeboard, young man.”

“Yessir, I plan on doing some serious wakeboarding.”

“All right, then.”

Grandpa drove up to the larger section of the cove to give Noah plenty of room. “How fast do you like to go, Noah?” Grandpa asked.

“About twenty?”

“All right. Let’s see what you can do!”

“Yessir!” Noah put on a vest, tossed his wakeboard onto the water, and dove after it.

Stephanie touched my arm and whispered in my ear. “Don’t be nervous. He likes you!”

“Ready?” Grandpa called to Noah.

“Hit it!” Noah yelled.

And Grandpa took off, and Noah put on a show. He popped out of the water, jumped high over the wake, and then started carving the choppy water adjacent to the boat. He then did a three-sixty while skiing back over the wake in the other direction. Then he jumped
over the wake, high in the air, landed with a splash and kept on going. Wow, he was amazing!

He landed jump after jump, with Stephanie and me sitting in the back of the boat cheering for him. On one jump, he tried to turn a complete flip, and wiped out. But he came up laughing. After that, I skied again, and then Stephanie tried kneeboarding again, and she even managed to cross the wake before she wiped out.

When we were all completely worn out, wrapped in towels and lying across the boat seats, Grandpa brought us in, and we tied up the boat. Grandma met us on the dock, and we sat out there soaking in the sun, taking breaks to jump in the water and cool off every now and then. The floating dock creaked and rocked under us, making us so relaxed it was hard to stay awake. Noah was lying beside me on a towel on the dock, and when I closed my eyes I got goosebumps thinking about how close he was.

Stephanie was watching us, meeting my eyes and raising her eyebrows and giving me meaningful smiles. I was trying to ignore her.

Part of me wished I could just get a few minutes alone with Noah, and part of me was avoiding it.

The goslings, only a few hours old, were all fluffy now, with grayish-yellow down and little beige beaks.
They cheeped constantly, scooting around their mom, who remained sitting stoically on the nest and nuzzling them.

I was dying to pick one up, but thought I better not try with the mother and father goose so watchful.

“Let’s leave them alone for now, though I don’t know how they’re going to get down from that boat cover,” Grandpa said. “We may need to give them a little help once they’re ready to leave the nest.”

“When will that be?” Stephanie asked.

“I have no idea!” Grandpa said.

Noah was extremely polite to Grandma and Grandpa, saying, “sir,” and “ma’am.” Then Grandma gave him one of her famous interviews.

“Where do you think you want to go to college, Noah?”

“Well, my older brother goes to Wake Forest, so …” Noah kind of trailed off. “I’m not sure. I guess I’ll just have to see where I get in.”

“Grandpa taught at Wake Forest,” I said.

“Oh, really?”

“For thirty years,” Grandpa said proudly.

“What did you teach?” Noah asked.

“Physics.”

“Whoa. I’m supposed to take Physics next year. My brother said it was a bear.”

“What’s your brother majoring in, Noah?” Grandma asked.

“I don’t think he’s decided.”

I could tell Noah was starting to squirm. “Hey, come see the fawn,” I said.

“Su re!”

As we headed up through the back yard, I sneaked glances at Noah. His wet hair was starting to wave as it dried, and his silver earring glinted in the afternoon sun. In the kitchen, as I grabbed a bottle and heated it up, I felt hyperaware of him standing next to me, watching.

“Wow,” he said as he followed me out onto the sun porch. “You all sure have a lot of wildlife around here.”

“Maa!” Star tottered toward me the minute I came in with the bottle.

Stephanie joined us, and then we all sat on the floor, watching while Star drank her bottle, pulling hard.

“She’s so enthusiastic!” Noah said, laughing.

“I know! Isn’t she cute?” Stephanie said.

She drained the bottle in no time, and then we walked Star around the yard.

“So,” Noah asked, as we strolled through the grass, glancing at Grandma in the kitchen window. “You guys in trouble for taking the car?”

“Yeah, we’re grounded,” Stephanie said.

“Nice to go kneeboarding and have a friend over while you’re grounded!”

“Yeah!” I said. “You didn’t give them much of a choice since you just showed up.”

“Hey, they invited me yesterday!” Noah said.

As we came around from the back to the side yard, gravel crunched as a dark blue pickup truck pulled into our driveway. A pretty lady with blonde hair wearing overalls climbed out of the driver’s seat. “Hi, I’m Kirsten, the wildlife rehabilitator.”

My heart pounded once, hard. I had known this was coming, but I was filled with dread. She seemed really nice. I realized I had been hoping I could come up with reasons not to let her see Star. “Hi, I’m Diana, the one who called you.”

“So this is your orphaned fawn! What a sweetie!” She immediately came over and knelt next to Star, rubbing her hands over Star’s ears and face. Star licked her cheek. “They like the taste of salt on our skin,” Kirsten said. She ran her hands over Star, expertly checking for injuries.

“Oh!” I knelt, too. “I thought she was being affectionate toward me.”

“No, sorry, it’s just the salt,” Kirsten said, with a laugh. “This fawn looks to be about a week old. Really young. And you waited for the mother to come back?”

“Yeah, I found her in the woods and brought her
home, but then took her back and waited almost a whole day.”

Kirsten nodded, looking at me with kind brown eyes. “See, usually the mothers will have two babies. And they will stash them, a little distance apart, at dawn. They put them in a different place every day. And the does will be gone for most of the day, and then come back at dusk.”

“Her mother didn’t come back. I waited.”

“Maybe something happened to the mother.”

“I hit a deer when I was driving the day before I found her. It was near where she was. I thought it might have been her mother. It didn’t fall down when I hit it. It kept running.”

Kirsten’s eyes widened. “That could be. It might have had a lot of adrenalin in its system and been able to run a long distance with injuries.” Kirsten smiled and ran her palm over Star’s head. “But she didn’t make it back. You probably saved this fawn’s life.”

A warm feeling coursed through me.

Just then Grandpa and Grandma came out onto the porch, and I introduced them to Kirsten.

“She’s been giving the fawn a bottle of goat’s milk every three hours or so, just like we read online,” Grandpa said.

“Great. She looks good. You’ve done a good job,”
Kirsten said, with a smile that crinkled the skin beside her eyes.

I wanted to stall for time. “So, how many fawns have you taken care of?”

“Oh, dozens and dozens.” Kirsten went to the back of the truck and pulled out a large dog carrier and set it on the ground. “Sometimes I’m taking care of as many as eight or nine fawns at once.”

“How long do you keep them?”

“I keep them about a week. Then I pass them on to another rehabilitator who keeps them a little longer, and gets them on goat chow and sweet feed, and then releases them into the wild. They join existing herds.”

“Do the other herd members attack the new ones? I learned that horses sometimes do that.”

“No, deer aren’t like that. They don’t pick on a new member. They welcome them.”

“Oh, that’s good.” I racked my brain for more questions. She was going to put Star in that carrier and take her. I swallowed. “I can come to visit her, right?”

Kirsten’s eyes softened, and she looked down quickly. “No, Diana, I’m sorry, you can’t. Fawns imprint really easily on humans. She is following you like a dog, so it looks like she might have already imprinted on you. We need for her to have only one caretaker, and that has to be me. So, you’ll have to say your good-byes now, I’m afraid.”

Tears sprang to my eyes.

“You mean I’ll never see her again?”

Kirsten’s eyes teared a little now, too. “No, you won’t.”

I felt like sobbing. It wasn’t just saying good-bye to Star. It was everything.

“Listen, you’re doing the right thing, Diana.” Kirsten put her hand gently on my arm. “It’s illegal to keep a deer as a pet. This way she’ll be in good hands and she’ll find a herd to belong to.”

I knelt and took Star’s little body in my arms, feeling the beat of her heart in her chest. I touched some of the delicate, star-like white spots that lined her backbone and spread over her flanks. She stared at me with those almond eyes framed with the long lashes. Now I couldn’t stop the crying. “Bye, Star.” She nuzzled and licked the side of my face. Just for the salt, according to Kirsten. “You be good, now.”

I glanced up at Stephanie and saw that she was crying, too. So were Grandma and Grandpa. I couldn’t even look at Noah.

My vision was blurred as Kirsten put Star in the carrier and shut the door. “All set, then.” Kirsten put the carrier in the truck’s passenger seat.

“Maa!” said Star.

My heart jumped. I balled my hands into fists.

“Thanks for calling me. She’s in good hands,”
Kirsten said as she began to back out of the driveway. I followed her to the end of the driveway and watched as the blue truck wound around the corner and out of sight.

I wiped my nose on the end of my t-shirt as I headed back down the driveway. Grandma took my face in her hands and kissed me on the forehead.

“You did a good thing, Diana.”

“I better get going,” Noah said. He picked up his wake board from the porch where he’d left it.

Grandma and Grandpa and Stephanie told Noah good-bye and left the two of us out by the driveway alone. Noah leaned against the porch stairs. “I’m sorry you’re so sad about the fawn.”

“I know it was the right thing. I’ll get over it. I just … I don’t know.” I wiped my nose with the back of my hand. “I’m sorry to be so upset.”

“Don’t be. I like that about you. You get so into stuff.”

“Oh. Thanks.” I felt my cheeks flush with pleasure.

“Okay, well, I guess I’ll see you?”

I looked into his face, feeling a little out of breath. “I thought we weren’t going to talk. And now here you showed up today. What’s that about?”

He shrugged. “Maybe yesterday wasn’t a mistake. Maybe we can hang out over the summer and see how
it goes.” He bumped the wake board against his leg nervously a couple of times. “No pressure. What do you think?”

“No pressure?” That sounded pretty good.

Then he touched his index finger to the end of my nose. “No pressure.”

After he left, Stephanie and I went inside and cleaned up the sun porch. Moronic Mood-o-Meter zooming around at about a nine. “You were right. He likes me. But he says no pressure.” I dipped the mop in the bucket of vinegar and water to swab the floor.

“Awesome, Diana!” Stephanie was collecting the towels to put in the laundry. “That is so great!”

I wrung out the mop, and swabbed one section. “I thought he liked you at first.”

“No, look at the way he came out last night to bring you gas.” Stephanie went behind me, drying the floor with one of the towels. “Noah really cares about you.”

As I mopped another section of the floor, I said, “In the past, with guys, I’ve kind of messed things up. I don’t want that to happen this time.”

“It won’t,” Stephanie said. “You’ve changed. You’re more caring. You risked getting in trouble last night to come and help me out. Honestly, I’ll never forget that.”

I leaned on the mop, letting her words sink it. It felt like the sun was warming my face.

“I feel like, no matter what happens with Daddy and
Lynn, you and I will always be close. We’ll always be sisters.”

I felt tears pricking at the corners of my eyes. Would I ever have believed that this could happen, back when we were first together at the ranch?

I closed my eyes, letting a few moments spin by in silence.

“But there’s something else I’ve been wondering about,” Stephanie was saying. I opened my eyes.

“What?”

“Do you remember when Kirsten picked up Star, she said that usually the mother deer has two fawns?” Stephanie looked at me with fearful eyes. “Do you think there might be another fawn out there in the woods? Waiting for the mother to come back?”

I stared at Stephanie and caught my breath. Why hadn’t I thought of that? “There might! We have to go check!”