Second Chance Summer (Chance Series, #1) (17 page)

I look up at the house. The only light that’s on is the porch light that flickered when we first drove up, and for the first time in years the dark house seems ominous. Maybe it’s because I don’t know what I’m gonna find when I open the door, or maybe it’s because I don’t know what’s gonna happen the next time I come face to face with my mom.

I swallow. Reese reaches over the gearstick to take my hand, and I can feel his eyes burning holes into the side of my head.

“You don’t have to go home yet. You can stay with me tonight, or I’ll drive you to Luce’s. Wherever.”

I want him to take me to his place, but my head shakes in the negative. “I have to go home sooner or later, and as appealing as later sounds right now, it isn’t gonna do me any favors.”

He nods and lets my hand go. I slide from the truck, digging in my purse for my house keys. I unlock the front door and push it open, squeezing through when it catches on a pile of mail. She hasn’t even been home since Friday night…

I sigh, bending down to pick it up.
Here I am
, I think, flicking through the envelopes
. Here I am, playing parent yet again
. I take out the bills and rest them on the side, my eyes catching on a large envelope with my name hand-written. My eyes narrow as I run my finger along the flap, the handwriting vaguely familiar to me from ghosts of memories of years past.

I stop, my finger millimeters from the edge of the flap.

Dad’s writing.

Reese hauls my stuff into the hallway, talking about something. I stand still, staring at the envelope. I can barely breathe. For as long as I can remember, the item in my hand is the very thing I craved. The thing I needed and wanted more than the air I breathe every day… But now? Now I’m not so sure.

After all, didn’t I crave the truth about why he left? And look how well that went down…

“Kia?” Reese says my name softly, and I let my eyes slowly move to his. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s a letter,” I reply in a shaky voice.

“I can see that.”

“From my dad.” My voice cracks in the middle of the word “dad,” and I find myself swallowing again.

“Ah.” Reese shuts the door and leans against it. “And you don’t want to open it?”

“I don’t know,” I say slowly. “I think I do. No, I do. But I’m scared. What if it tells me everything I’ve always thought?”

“Even though you know the truth now?”

I nod, my thumb slicing the last of the envelope flap. “I guess I have nothing to lose.”

My shaky fingers pull the letter from the envelope. I let it drop to the floor as I unfold the piece of paper.

Kia,

I’m sorry for the way I showed up on Friday. If I could have, I would have explained more then, but I’m sure you know why I didn’t. I’d tried to call beforehand, but your mom obviously changed the number or she blocked mine.

I’m staying at the Eagle just outside the Grove – you know it. Your gran always used to stay here when she came back to visit before she died. I’m here until next Friday when I have to go back home, and I’d love if you could come and see me. I don’t think it’s wise for me to come back into town for a day or two.

I want us to talk – just me and you – so I can explain everything from my side. I don’t know what your mom has told you over the years, if anything, and if she has, how much of it is true. I hope you’ll give me the chance to tell you my side.

I never stopped missing you, Kia bear, and I regret that I didn’t try harder to keep in contact with you. I was a fool, and I hope one day you’ll find it in your heart to forgive me for not doing everything I could.

If you need me, call the Eagle and leave a message. I’ll check in with Clara on the bar a few times a day so I don’t miss it.

Love always,

Dad

Reese’s fingers swipe across my cheeks, and it’s not until I look at him that I notice I’m crying silently. I drop the letter and let him fold me into his embrace. I need the safety and comfort I can find in his arms, just for a second.

“Luce’s?” he whispers. I nod against his chest and let him pull me back outside to the truck.

I don’t understand the tears. Wasn’t it only yesterday I was vowing to myself I wouldn’t cry anymore? Yeah, that lasted long… But I can’t control them.

Call the Eagle Inn
, he said. He’s barely twenty minutes away from me, and it sets my mind whirring. Do we live that close to each other in New York? I know it’s unlikely given the size of the city, merely a childish hope creeping through, but that doesn’t change the fact he’s offering me everything I’ve wanted for as long as I can remember. Answers. The truth – and the whole truth.

Reese pulls up outside Luce’s house and looks over at me. “Come here.” He holds his arms out, and I undo my belt and lean over. His strong arms wrap around my body, tucking my head into his neck as he squeezes me tightly. I breathe in slowly, savoring the moment, savoring the momentary peace I feel with him because I know it isn’t gonna last long.

The front light switches on, lighting up the porch in front of us, and Luce’s mom opens the door. Faintly, I hear her call to Luce, and I sigh. I love Luce more than anything, but even she can’t give me the comfort I feel in Reese’s arms.

But Reese isn’t always going to be there. His arms aren’t always going to be open at the exact second I need them to be, and I don’t expect that. After all, I dealt with it all long enough by myself, and last year…

I shake my head to banish those thoughts and sit up. I slowly rub a hand down my face and let out the breath clawing up my throat.

“Okay?” Reese asks softly.

I nod, even though we both know it’s a lie, because I know I will be in the end. Because, goddammit, I am an independent woman, and as much as I need Reese, I don’t need him to make me okay. He takes away the pain I feel, but to be okay, I need to face up to that pain, which means I need to be alone right now more than I need him. I might be cheating by seeing my best friend, but that’s the beauty of friendship.

Love helps pain, but its friendship that puts it all into perspective, no matter how fucked up that perspective might be.

Reese leaves me at my best friend’s door with a tender kiss to my forehead. “I’ll call you tomorrow on my break, okay?”

I nod again and squeeze his waist quickly before Leo scoops an arm around my shoulders and whisks me into the house. He dumps me on the sofa next to Luce without any questions.

“Do we need to break someone’s legs?” Liam asks, walking into the room with Lucas on his heels. Luce rolls her eyes, but I crack a small smile.

“No, no leg breaking – or any other bone breaking – needed.”

“Dammit,” Lucas mutters, the three of them filing out of the room with a kiss to the top of my head. Who needs real brothers when I have these three adopted goons?

Their mom whips up a pan of homemade hot chocolate while I change into a pair of Luce’s pajamas and curl back up on the sofa with her. The television flickers soundlessly in the corner of the room, and I curve my fingers around the mug as I recap everything in great detail. I start with Dad’s appearance, skim my weekend with Reese, and finish with the letter. My best friend listens silently, only her eyes giving away how she feels about everything.

The anger at my parents. Relief I was safe with Reese. Disbelief at Dad’s letter.

And then she asks me the million dollar question.

“So what are you gonna do about it?”

I shrug, staring into my mug. “I have no idea. I want to hear him out, but then I ask myself if he really deserves it. And then I remember it wasn’t his fault, that it’s Mom’s fault that he could never contact me, so he does deserve his chance to speak. And
then
I remember he’s admitted he didn’t do as much as he could to see me, so he doesn’t deserve his chance. And then I don’t know because it’s such a fucked up situation.”

Luce taps her acrylic nails against her mug, the tapping grating against me slightly. I shoot her a look, and she stops with an apologetic smile.

“I wish I could tell you what to do, Kia. I wish I had the answers for you,” she says sadly.

I give her a small, broken smile. “I wish I had them, too.”

~

One of the best things about mine and Luce’s friendship is the fact we wear the exact same size and have a similar style, so impromptu sleepovers aren’t a problem. That and I feel totally at ease raiding her closet for something to wear.

“So… Reese. And you.” She smacks her lips together, blotting her red lipstick out on a tissue.

Despite myself, a smile creeps onto my face. I glance at her and nod. Luce grins widely.

“I take that to mean you’re finally official?” I nod again, and her grin widens even more.

“He decided it yesterday… After he found out about Jay and the plan for me to move into his place after the summer.”

“Typical males. Always needing to stake their claim.” Luce shakes her head. “So I guess he’ll go with you if you see your Dad?”

I shake my head and pull one of her tees over my head. “No. If I go and see my dad – and that’s one huge damn if – I’ll be going by myself. This is somethin’ I have to do alone. Reese can be there at the end of it to make it better, but he can’t be there to hold my hand the whole way through. Besides…” I shut the closet door. “…I don’t need him to hold my hand. I’m not broken or weak.”

“That’s my girl! I was afraid you were gonna become of those pansies in love.”

“Then you really don’t know me at all.” I grin.

“What are you gonna do today, Miss Independent Woman?”

“I was gonna drop by Patty’s. She said before I needed to find out the truth about my parents, and I’m guessin’ she knew it all along. She might be able to help me figure out what to do. I know it’s my choice and all that, but I just need to talk about it. Get it all out so it makes sense. It’s kinda jumbled in my brain.”

“That’s ‘cause your brain is jumbled, girl,” Luce replies. “And with damn good reason. You go do what you gotta do. You know I’ll be here if you need me.”

I smile at her as I make my way downstairs. Everyone else in her family is at work, and since Patty’s is only minutes away from Luce’s house, I walk toward there.

It’s only early but the temperatures are already rocketing up, and I feel a sheen of sweat coat the back of my neck as I reach the small grocery store. Thankfully it’s quiet, only one or two people in the aisle, and judging by the strained smile on Patty’s face, they’re tourists passing through.

Harlan Grove doesn’t get tourists. Not ones that stay, at any rate. After all, a bowling alley, one small grocery store, a garage, and a field used by the local teens for parties on a weekend doesn’t exactly scream, “Vacation hotspot!”

Okay, so the Grove has a few more things – High School, a couple local stores and a bar or two, but still. It’s not relaxation central and the only reason tourists stop by Patty’s is to ask directions to wherever it is they’re trying to get to.

I push my way inside as Patty rings up their order and takes their money.

“Have a nice trip!” she calls after them, waving her chubby hand. She turns to me, tucks a lock of hair behind her ear, and beams. “Kia!” Her smile becomes a frown.

“Um, hi.” I shrug sheepishly. “I’m sorry I disappeared this weekend.” She raises her eyebrows. “Real sorry?” I try.

“Mmhmm.” She links her fingers on the counter in front of her and sighs. “One problem fixed, and another started, right, sugar?”

“I know better than to ask you how you know,” I mutter.

“Luce came over here like her little butt was on fire when she realized you and Reese had both skipped town,” Patty explains anyway. “I told her to keep her panties straight, ‘cause you and he were probably livin’ it up on the beach somewhere away from our meddlin’.” She gives me an exaggerated wink, and I smirk a little.

“Close.”

“But I don’t know the reason you skipped town, so why don’t you sit down on this here seat and tell me everythin’.”

I tell her exactly what I told Luce last night, and she nods along. “And I know you knew why he left,” I accuse her. “Otherwise you wouldn’t have said what you did before – about findin’ out the reason why. Did everyone know?”

Patty shakes her head vehemently. “No, honey, not many people did know. The guy your momma cheated with wasn’t from this town.” She clicks her tongue. “That’s why I told you to find out before you made your impulsive teenage decisions about Reese. It weren’t your daddy’s fault, and now you know that. Question is, what are you gonna do about it?”

“I wish I knew.”

“If you ask me, and I’m assumin’ ya are since you’re here…” She chuckles. “I think you should go speak with your daddy. Your momma had her chance for six years, honey. She’s told you her side of the story, no matter how misconstrued it was, and now your daddy deserves the same chance.”

I open my mouth to respond, but the bell over the door rings. I glance over to see Pheobe and one of her friends, Janine, enter the store. Pheobe gives me a pitiful look, which I return, and stalks through the store.

Patty leans toward me, tapping her finger against my knee, and lowers her voice. “If she hadn’t have stopped him contactin’ you at every possible turn, you would have given him the chance, wouldn’t you?” I nod, and she sits back, a small, knowing smile playing on her rosy pink lips. “Well, what makes it so different now?”

CHAPTER 12

The Eagle Inn is a bar and bed and breakfast dating back to the early eighteenth century. Although it’s more modern now, it still retains most of its former characteristics. Not to mention its charm - if the building was a guy, it would charm the panties off the Ice Queen.

But I don’t see the charm. I don’t see the restored wooden panels on the front of the building or the rotted, paint-chipped sign hanging by the door. I don’t see anything that makes it charming, not today.

It’s been a day since I spoke with Patty. I let her words churn over and over in my mind before they finally sunk in. She was right – I would have given Dad the chance six years ago, and really, his silence wasn’t his fault. That’s why I called him this morning.