Second Time Around (10 page)

Tears filled Suzie’s eyes, but Nora wasn’t finished. ‘As far as everyone was concerned it was party time. But they were anxious, too, treating you like a piece of delicate
china and watching you like hawks when you fell asleep, checking that you were still breathing. When you came home they were nervous wrecks, especially Noel, as he was living with you.’

‘Noel doesn’t let anything rattle him,’ Suzie assured her.

‘He may play the clown, but, trust me, he worries about you just as much as the girls do. As the days rolled by, they began to notice more and more, the changes in you. The girls were a
bit shocked and embarrassed by your colourful language but Noel thought it was funny. He didn’t really take on board that the changes in your personality ran deeper than simply
swearing.’

‘They don’t.’ Suzie finally found her voice, her face flushed and angry. ‘I’m fine and getting better every day.’

Nora felt dreadful doing this to her friend but, now that she’d started, she had to finish it, even if Suzie wanted no more to do with her afterwards. ‘Physically, maybe, but
emotionally you’re totally unpredictable. You’re making hasty decisions and constantly lashing out at the girls without any thought of the hurt you’re causing. Once they had a
loving mother and best friend; now they’re trying to deal with an angry woman who criticises them and blows a fuse at the slightest thing. I’m sorry, but there’s no nice way of
saying it, Suzie: you’re hard to live with. But – and it’s very important that you hear this – it’s not your fault.’ Nora felt herself begin to tear up now and
she reached for Suzie’s hand. ‘It’s all down to that bloody fall. The thing is, that doesn’t make it any easier for your kids. You may have been the one to take the fall,
Suzie, but they’re victims of that dreadful accident as much as you are.’

At this stage, Nora expected Suzie to tell her to fuck off and walk out, but instead she sat there in silence, which was almost more alarming. ‘Suzie?’ The pain in her friend’s
eyes when they met Nora’s tore at her heart. ‘I’m sorry. I’ve probably said too much. But it’s hard standing on the side-line and watching your family go through
this.’

‘There must be something I can do,’ Suzie said looking shell-shocked.

‘I’m not sure that there is right now but, with time, you’ll probably make a complete recovery.’

‘Don’t.’ Suzie put up her hand and Nora fell silent, realising that it was too late to try to cheer her up after all that she’d said. God, what had she done?

‘They’d have been better off if I’d died.’

‘Don’t say that.’

Suzie carried on, staring into space. ‘It’s true. They’d have been able to mourn and then move on. Instead I’m making them hate me. I’m going to drive them away and
there’s not a damn thing that I can do about it.’

Feeling sick, Nora decided to try giving Suzie a taste of her own medicine. She topped up their glasses. ‘That’s a very melodramatic and pessimistic attitude. Cop on and have a
drink. I’m sure there’s plenty you can do. There must be support groups for people with TBIs – traumatic brain injuries,’ she added when Suzie looked blank.

‘Jess mentioned one a couple of weeks ago. I thought that she was suggesting it to make me feel better, but she wasn’t thinking of me at all, was she?’

‘She’s your eldest, Suzie; she knows you well and was the first to pick up on how your personality had changed. I’m sure that she thinks that talking to other people in your
situation would be as beneficial to you as the family.’

‘I have these dreams,’ Suzie declared.

Nora frowned at the sudden change of subject. ‘Oh?’

‘Nightmares, really. At least I think they are. I’m never sure if that’s all they are or if they’re memories of bad times.’

Feeling on decidedly dodgy ground, Nora shrugged. ‘I think we all have them.’ At least Suzie was having this conversation with her and not the dreaded Mandy. It occurred to her that
Suzie’s little sister might be planting ideas in her head. Nora would put nothing past that manipulative bitch. She considered warning Suzie about her sister, then decided against it.
She’d let Suzie come to her own conclusions as time went on. Hopefully it wouldn’t take long for her to remember what Mandy was really like.

‘So, am I still welcome to stay the night or do you want me to feck off back to Limerick?’ She said it with a smile but watched Suzie, anxious that she’d lost a friend.

‘Stay.’ Suzie took her hand, her grip so firm it hurt. ‘And, as I said to Aileen, please never stop giving it to me straight. Promise?’

Nora swallowed the lump in her throat and nodded. ‘Promise. So, what now?’

Suzie thought about that for a second. ‘I suppose I should check out these groups, maybe go along and talk to other weirdos.’

Nora smiled. ‘You’re not a weirdo, you’re injured; the walking wounded, I suppose. Ask Jess, I think you’ll find that she has the name and number of every organisation in
the country.’

‘I was horrible to her about seeing that man, Nora, but the thing is, I can’t guarantee I’ll be any nicer to her the next time I see her. I get so angry, and afterwards I feel
exhausted. Then I spend the night either lying awake replaying the row, or fall asleep and have these fucking nightmares.’

‘So, explain that to her, to the three of them. The more that they understand what’s going on in your head, the less chance there is of them feeling hurt when you lash
out.’

‘The priority has to be Bobby. I need to help Sharon sort that child out.’

Nora sighed, feeling as if her long, heartfelt speech had been a waste of time. Would Suzie even remember what she’d said tomorrow? ‘No, Suzie, that’s his parents’ job.
Your priority is to get better for the sake of all the family.’

‘I don’t fancy sitting in a circle and sharing.’ Suzie stuck her lip out like a stubborn child.

‘Wouldn’t it be worth it if it meant giving your kids back their mum?’

Suzie gave a heavy sigh. ‘I suppose, given that I survived, I owe it to them to try.’

‘So, you’ll do it?’ Nora persisted.

‘Fine. Yes, I’ll do it,’ Suzie said, scowling.

‘Good for you.’ Nora smiled and crossed her fingers.

Suzie was just putting on a wash when her mobile phone rang. She scanned the kitchen, trying to figure out where the ringing was coming from. ‘For fuck’s
sake!’ she muttered, finally locating it in the pocket of the jacket she’d left on the back of a chair. ‘Hello?’

‘Mrs Connors?’

‘Yes?’

‘Hi. My name is Mary. I’m calling from the DSPCA, the rescue centre.’

‘Oh, hello, Mary.’ Suzie smiled as she recalled her morning meeting all the lovely doggies. ‘How’s Percy?’

Mary laughed. ‘Well, funny you should ask, he’s the reason that I’m calling.’

‘Oh?’ Suzie settled herself at the kitchen table to listen. Twenty minutes later she was banging on Aileen’s back door. ‘Aileen? Aileen, are you there?’ she
shouted.

‘I’m coming, I’m coming!’ Her neighbour thumped down the stairs and threw it open, breathing heavily. ‘What is it, Suzie? What’s wrong? Your feckin’
house better be on fire after the fright you gave me.’

‘No, everything’s grand. In fact, it’s better than grand.’

‘Get in here and put on that kettle while I catch my breath. This better be good.’

Suzie did as she was told and, as they were waiting for the kettle to boil, she turned to look at her friend, sitting at the table, chest heaving. ‘I just got a call from Mary at the
rescue centre. Remember Percy, the assistance dog?’

Aileen smiled. ‘Aw, sure, who could forget that oul’ pet? He was almost human. What about him?’ Her eyes widened. ‘Ah, don’t tell me he’s died.’

‘Now how would that be good news? Of course he’s not dead, but his owner is.’ Suzie carried two mugs of tea to the table.

‘And that’s good news? That bloody head injury has knocked every ounce of compassion out of you, do you know that? May she rest in peace.’

‘Amen.’ Suzie crossed herself. ‘But don’t you see? It means Percy needs a new home. Mary remembered how fond I was of him and thought we would make a good
match.’

Aileen’s eyes widened. ‘Are you going to take him? Really, Suzie?’

‘I don’t know, maybe. Mary’s bringing him over tomorrow. We agreed that he could stay with me for a couple of weeks’ trial and then I could decide whether I want to adopt
him or not.’

‘That’s a good idea but where will you put him?’

Suzie frowned. ‘I’m not sure. He’s used to being indoors.’

‘You could put his bed in the porch by the back door, and, as he’s so obedient, you’ll probably be able to let him come and go the rest of the time. I’d keep him away
from Bobby in case he’s afraid of dogs.’

Suzie grinned. ‘Ah, Aileen, who could be afraid of Percy? There’s more chance of the poor dog being scared of that little demon. I need to make a list of stuff to buy. A bed and some
toys. Oh, and food.’ She frowned at Mary. ‘Feck! I never asked what he eats.’

‘Why don’t you put a list of questions together and phone Mary back? There’s no point in spending a fortune if you decide you can’t keep him,’ Aileen warned.

‘Yes, that’s a good idea, I’ll do that.’ Suzie hopped up and headed for the door.

‘What about your tea?’

‘I don’t have time for tea. I have to get ready!’

‘I hope it works out for you,’ Aileen called after her, laughing.

Mandy dropped the phone with a curse. This was the fourth time her sister had blown her off when she tried to discuss their New York trip, this time muttering something about
dog food. Mandy wasn’t impressed. She’d been on Douglas’s laptop all week checking out clubs and restaurants in New York that she wanted to try, and the shops that she wanted to
take Suzie and her credit card to, but her sister had been quite abrupt and wouldn’t even let her book the flights, muttering something about family and responsibilities. Perhaps her memory
was returning, which would be really bloody annoying. And it had looked as if things were going Mandy’s way. She sighed as she looked longingly at the image of the four-star hotel on the
screen before her. She’d been meant for greater things, she deserved better. She’d lost out in love, so she felt entitled to make up for it with material comforts, and Suzie could
easily afford it.

‘Very nice.’

Mandy jumped at Douglas’s voice behind her. ‘Isn’t it?’

He nodded at the screen. ‘Is that where you’re staying?’

‘We haven’t decided yet,’ she demurred. He would just love it if she told him the holiday was in doubt. It would give him a great laugh altogether. ‘We’re not sure
of our dates yet. Suzie has to get the all-clear from her doctor.’

‘But it is definitely happening?’

‘Of course, why wouldn’t it?’

He shrugged, his expression all innocence. ‘No reason, other than you’ve been mooning and sighing over that website all morning.’

She glared at him. ‘I’m going, Douglas. Nothing’s going to stop me.’

His eyes widened at her vehemence and she flashed him a smile to hide her anger. He was still her employer – well, for the moment. ‘Sorry, it’s just that it’s been so
long since I visited the States and I adore New York.’

‘Really?’ He blinked as if that made no sense to him at all. ‘Why?’

‘Because it’s exciting, it’s happening and there are opportunities around every corner.’

‘And muggers.’

‘You are such a cynic. Surely you’ve written about New York, about Greenwich Village, the Chelsea Hotel, Brooklyn, Central Park?’

He laughed. ‘Oh, please. Did you even visit any of those landmarks? I bet you confined yourself to the shops, bars and the clubs.’

Shit, he knew her too damn well. ‘And what’s wrong with enjoying the good things in life?’

‘You’re missing out on so much, Amanda. Art, music, history.’ He reached for his jacket. ‘I’m going out. Lock up when you’re leaving, would you?’

Mandy opened her mouth to ask where he was going but he was already halfway out of the door. Good riddance. If he could take the afternoon off, then she didn’t see why she couldn’t
do the same. She’d check his email, set the answering service and go into town. To hell with Douglas Thornton and his smart mouth. She quickly scanned the emails and then pulled up short when
she saw the last one from the Department of Tourism in Croatia. What the hell?

‘Amanda? What are you still doing here?’

She jerked up from the sofa. She’d been reading her novel and dozed off. Not because of the story, but more to do with the amount of Douglas’s wine she’d consumed.
‘You’re back!’

He picked up the empty glass and raised an eyebrow. ‘And you’re pissed.’

‘No! Well . . .’ She blinked, trying to focus on one of him. ‘A little tipsy, maybe. But I was celebrating.’

‘Celebrating what, exactly?’

‘You got an email from Croatia’s Department of Tourism. They want to honour you for the piece that you wrote about them. Apparently, you’ve contributed hugely to their country
being tipped as a top cultural and historical destination.’

Douglas wrinkled his brow. ‘Which publication was that in?’

She shrugged. ‘No idea. Who cares? They’re inviting you over to a special reception, all expenses paid.’

He tossed his jacket in a chair. ‘Draft a letter of refusal for me to sign, would you?’ He wandered into the kitchen and poured himself a glass from the second bottle of wine
she’d opened.

‘I don’t think so.’ Sobered by his reaction, Amanda swung her feet off the sofa and followed him, glaring. ‘You’re going.’

His eyes widened, incredulous. ‘Excuse me?’

‘No, actually, I don’t excuse you. This is a great honour and if you refuse it you are being insulting and condescending.’

‘It isn’t the big deal you think it is,’ he assured her. ‘I’ve been invited to awards ceremonies in several countries over the years, but there’s no such
thing as a free lunch or holiday. They’ll take me to visit all the sights they want to promote and expect me to write about them.’

‘And what’s wrong with that?’ she demanded, feeling really cross now.

‘Why are you so angry?’ He looked bemused.

‘Because you have so much and you don’t appreciate it.’ She flung her hands out and spun around, suddenly furious. ‘This gorgeous house, no money worries, the freedom to
go anywhere you want, whenever you want to. You spend your life cooped up inside like a geriatric. Why don’t you just move into a nursing home and have done with it?’