Secrets of the Heart (24 page)

“Oh God in heaven, it can’t be true. It mustn’t be true. Was I right to send him away after all? Is he like Vale and not to be trusted?”

Lightning streaked across the sky, briefly illuminating her path. The sea crashed against the rocks below. The rain soaked through her yellow muslin gown, and she shivered. Lady Darby’s spiteful words stung like the sudden pelting rain that mixed with her angry tears.

“God, why do You punish me? You have taken away everyone I have ever loved,” she shouted to the cloud-swept heavens. “I have fought the attraction I feel for Lord Ravensmoore. I have sent him away, not knowing if I could trust him, and yet even now, knowing of his mother, I feel like I’ve committed some grave error in judgment. Why do You turn Your back on me? You truly do not care for me...and once...a long time ago...I thought You loved me.” She dropped her head in her hands and sobbed.

C
HAPTER 15

The sun also shines on the wicked.

—S
ENECA
,
R
OMAN
P
HILOSOPHER
,
M
ID
-F
IRST
C
ENTURY

O
N THE JOURNEY
back home Madeline sank into melancholia. The weather did not help her mood with its slow, seeping, drizzle of rain. A thunderstorm or downpour would have been a welcome change from the incessant weeping of the clouds. Even Hally, usually a bright spot in Madeline’s life, couldn’t rouse her, so she took refuge in naps while Madeline stared, sleepless, out the carriage window.

After two long days of travel, the coach dropped Hally at Gilling, then entered the road to Richfield just before the afternoon meal. Madeline, relishing the idea of a hot bath, closed her eyes and breathed deep. It had finally quit raining.

The butler opened the door. “Welcome back, Lady Madeline.”

“Good afternoon, Phineas. Would you have the footman take my trunk to my room and fill a warm bath for me?”

He took her cape and hat. “Immediately.”

She passed through the elegant foyer and entered her mother’s library. Mother had always loved this little hideaway. Her escape from the world, as she liked to call it. A place to keep her books and correspondence. Madeline knocked on the door and entered without waiting for permission. “Mother, I—”

Strange. Mother always enjoyed reading here this time of day. Madeline looked about and noticed the drapes were drawn. “How strange,” she murmured. The drapes were rarely closed; Mother loved them open. Since it had finally stopped raining, perhaps her mother had decided to sit out in the garden. Madeline stepped out on the terrace leading to the gardens but did not see her mother anywhere.

Perhaps she and Lord Vale were out. But Phineas would have mentioned that to her. She ran up the stairs to her room, where the footmen were pouring water into a large tub. “Daisy? Are you in here?” she asked, looking about. “Have either of you seen Daisy?”

“Folding linens, I believe, yer ladyship. Shall I fetch her?” asked the taller of the two.

“Please.” After they departed her quarters, Madeline removed her gloves and unpinned her hair, which fell about her shoulders in tangled disarray. Wiggling her fingers in the water of the tub, she judged the temperature near perfect.

“My lady.” Daisy inched into the room, her arms full of bed linens and towels. “I didn’t expect ye.” She offered a small smile and set her load on the bed. “There now. Did ye have a nice holiday?”

“It left much to be desired, although the beach was lovely. I love the smell of the sea.”

“Let me help ye out of your travel clothes.” Daisy made quick work of discarding Madeline’s dress and underclothes and helped her into the tub.

“Ahh. Heavenly. Daisy, would you scent the water with my jasmine?”

Daisy picked up a glass container from Madeline’s vanity and poured a small amount of the perfume into the bathwater.

Madeline waved her hands under the water to disperse the jasmine. “Now, dear Daisy. Sit down and tell me where Mother is and what’s been going on since I left. You are being far too quiet, and I never even knew you possessed the ability.”

Daisy looked away. “I really must go, my lady. There is much to do, and I wouldn’t want to fall behind in my duties.” The maid placed the towels and linens in the appropriate drawers.

“
I
am your duty, Daisy. Why don’t you tell me what’s going on around here while you wash my hair? You haven’t looked me in the eye once since you entered my chambers, and you’ve never been shy about gossiping in my presence.”

Daisy lathered Madeline’s hair and rinsed it out. Madeline enjoyed this ritual so much that she nearly fell asleep as Daisy repeated the process. “You are not talking. That in itself tells me something is amiss. Out with it.”

“Now don’t go gettin’ yerself all ruffled. I’m sure it’s nothin’ too serious. Your mother is a bit ill, but I’m sure she’ll be up and about in no time at all.”

“What kind of illness? Nothing serious I hope.”

“She’s overly tired. My mother has been takin’ good care of her. You can go see her after yer bath.”

“I believe my bath is finished. Grab my dressing gown and slippers, Daisy. Where is Lord Vale?”

“I’m not sure where he is, my lady.” She held the rose-colored dressing gown out for Madeline, who slipped into it after drying off. “I’m going to see my mother right now. Pick out a suitable gown, Daisy, and I’ll be back shortly.”

Daisy nodded.

Madeline padded through two hallways that opened into an expansive atrium that led to her mother’s suite of rooms. She knocked and, hearing no response, walked in. Taking in the scene, she tried to control the panic that threatened to overtake her. “Mother?”

“Oh, Maddie dear. I’m so glad you are home.” She ran to Madeline and flung her arms around Madeline’s neck and cried.

“Mother? What’s wrong? Let me look at you.” Madeline immediately noticed dark circles under her mother’s eyes and a look of one lost. Not her mother at all. The drapes were drawn in this room as well. “Let’s get some light in here.” Madeline reached to draw back the drapes.

“No. Please don’t, darling. The sun hurts my eyes, and I have an awful headache. I think I’ll lie down for a while.” She crawled into her bed and reached for a bottle at the bedside. “My medicine will help.” She picked up a spoon.

“What medicine? What are you taking?” Madeline rushed to the bedside and grabbed the bottle from her hand. “What is this?”

“Laudanum. Now let me take my medicine so I can sleep for a while, Maddie.”

Not knowing whether she should or shouldn’t allow this, she slipped the bottle into the pocket of her robe. “I must speak to Vale first.”

Madeline raced back to her room where Daisy waited. “Help me dress quickly, Daisy. How long has Mother been like this? Why didn’t you tell me?”

Daisy looked at the ground. “Lord Vale told me not to. He’s been different since ye left.”

“I’ll take care of Lord Vale,” Madeline said, anger burning up her spine. “And where is Agnes? Where is your mother?”

“Fixin’ some food for the countess. She won’t even let Cook do it.”

Madeline didn’t bother putting her shoes on or asking Daisy to fix her hair. As soon as the last button popped into place she grabbed the bottle and went looking for Vale, finally finding him in the library.

“What have you done to Mother?” Madeline demanded.

Vale leaned back in the leather chair that her father used to occupy. “Welcome home, Lady Madeline. I see that your journey did nothing to improve your temperament.”

“Mother is not herself. She’s unsettled and restless. There are dark circles under her eyes, and she wanted to take this.” She held out the bottle of laudanum.

“Yes. Grace has been having headaches, so I obtained the laudanum from the apothecary. She has improved only slightly and has been talking out of her head. I’m making temporary arrangements for her to stay at Ashcroft until she gets better.” Vale closed the book that lay open before him.

“Ashcroft? Whatever for? It’s a lunatic asylum! She’s not insane. She suffers from laudanum poisoning, I suspect. If you believe I will let her go, you are mad and can take yourself off to Ashcroft.”

“Be reasonable, Lady Madeline. I’ve done nothing to your mother.” Vale placed his hands on her shoulders.

She shrugged him off and stepped back.

“We cannot care for her here. She needs the kind of treatment that Ashcroft offers. Perhaps they can bring her out of this stupor. Don’t you see, you would be helping her to get well, not remain like she is.”

Madeline pushed away from him when he dared step closer. “I don’t care what you say; I will take care of my mother. I will make certain she gets well. If you love her, you will not speak of Ashcroft.” Angry tears threatened. She wished that her mother had never married this dreadful man.

“I do love her. That is why I must insist that you do what is right.” He poured a glass of port.

Madeline studied him. “You insist? Has a physician seen her?”

“I know what she needs. I spoke to the apothecary in York. I have everything under control.”

Searching his expression, she found what she was looking for. Arrogance. “How dare you.” Losing control, she slapped him. “You’re a monster! Leave this house at once!”

Vale remained amazingly calm and sipped his port. “You don’t know me very well,
Lady
Madeline, if you think I would leave Richfield.”

Unperturbed, he continued. “You have a lesson to learn, and I am just the man to teach you. Richfield is my home now.”

Madeline stormed from the room.
I must be careful. I must use my common sense, or he will take it out on Mother. He is so devious no one would ever know what a fiend lurks behind his handsome face. Please, God, protect us from this evil.

Agnes wiped the tears from her eyes when Madeline entered her mother’s rooms.

“She sleeps again. She remains the same,” Agnes said, bitterly.

“The same as what? What happened while I was in Scarborough?”

“I’m not sure. I thought it a fever at first or the beginnin’ of a serious illness. She became weaker and weaker with each passin’ day. Talkin’ out of her head and then not talkin’ at all. Sleepin’ and then restlessly pacin’.”

Madeline sat down on the side of the bed and tenderly laced her fingers through those of her mother—a morning ritual they’d shared many years ago when her mother would wake her. “Mama, can you hear me?”

No response.

“No matter what happens, I will not leave you.” She squeezed her mother’s limp hand, then raised it to gently touch her cheek. “I will not let you go.”

No response.

Her mind searched wildly for answers. What to do? Ravensmoore. No. Perhaps. He offered the obvious advantage. His medical expertise, plus the added benefit of being on her side and willing to do anything to help her. The trip to Gretna Green had told her that much. She’d lost her father, and Ravensmoore had been unable to save him, but did she have any choice but to trust him now that Mother’s life was at risk? He knew her mother, he understood her situation, and he might be able to help her.

“Agnes, send word to Ravensmoore that he is needed immediately.”

“An excellent plan, Lady Madeline.”

“Be careful that Vale does not know. Send Donavan.”

Madeline climbed into bed with her mother and cuddled close. She began singing a lullaby, one her mother used to sing to her and her siblings at night. Only it wasn’t meant to rock her mother to sleep. It was meant to reach that place deep inside of her, where she would hear, hold on, and know she wasn’t alone.

“Don’t be afraid, Mama. Don’t be afraid. I’ve sent for Ravensmoore.”

She fell asleep praying,
Lord, save my mother. Vale must not succeed.

Madeline woke with a start as the door banged open and Vale entered his wife’s room. Upon seeing Madeline, he stopped short.

Agnes edged her way into the room. Vale turned to her. “Agnes, I want you to prepare a trunk for Lady Madeline and then ready her for a short trip.” He touched his wife’s forehead.

Madeline slapped his hand away. “What are you talking about?”