“Healing really isn’t my strong suit.” It sounded like a lame excuse, which we didn’t have time for. He was right. “I’ll try it. Are you sure you want to be here for this? It might get kind of intense.” There was no nice way to skate around the subject. Healing would require calling on the power I shared with Arys. The power would draw Kale like a moth to a flame.
“I’m fine, Alexa. Really. Besides, if anything happens, you’ll have more than enough juice to take me out.” He shrugged like it was no big deal.
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” I shook my head and held up a hand before he could fire back at me. “Forget I said that. You have to give me some space. Maybe go pour Jez some coffee. If you don’t mind.”
Kale didn’t argue. He allowed me to banish him into the kitchen. I knew he wouldn’t stay there long.
It was hard to get into the zone. Knowing Kale was so close made it difficult to let go of my fear and embrace the power. Jez was relying on me. I had to put the risks aside and deal with them as they came.
Placing a hand on her forehead and another on her side, I closed my eyes and focused on Jez’s scattered energy. It felt rough, lacking the strong, smooth flow it should have. I aligned my energy with hers, blanketing her brokenness with my wholeness. Then I called forth the power coiled in my core. It rose up like a soft breeze, ruffling my hair. Concentrating hard on my intent, I targeted her weakness and, with a gentle push, breathed positive healing energy into her.
I couldn’t do anything about the drugs in her bloodstream, but I was able to strengthen her body’s response to them. Shifters process drugs and alcohol faster than humans. For her to be this screwed up, she must have really partied hard.
Healing was still new to me. I didn’t use my power this way near as often as I used it to harm or defend. In that moment, joined to Jez by something bigger than us both, I could feel the power of the light. It felt right.
Being aligned with her aura the way I was, I could feel the spark of darkness burning like a hot coal, hidden beneath the raw power of her leopard. Jez’s demon paternity was likely part of this emotional rollercoaster she was on. She didn’t talk about it much, but the one time it had come up, she’d admitted to wondering how much of her father lay within her.
I had no answer to that. The dark entity inside her rested, quiet, almost as if it was dormant. Waiting. The prowling wildcat within Jez seemed unaware of it.
I opened my eyes to find Kale staring at me. He stood in the doorway between the rooms with a steaming mug of coffee in hand and an unmistakable hunger burning in his predatory gaze. He moved with a slow, even gait. He set the coffee on the table, careful to keep his distance.
“Sorry to interrupt.”
“No worries.” I broke contact with Jez, satisfied when her energy hummed with a strong vibe. Unwilling to take my gaze off Kale, I stood up to face him. “Are you ok?”
“No,” he admitted, looking conflicted. “But I’ve got it under control.”
I knew that look. There were many ways to sate that kind of longing. None of them were without an element of danger. It took so very little for self-control to slip when the power guided the craving. Guilt slithered through me. It was joined by shame.
“Willow said we should talk. Apparently, there is something you need to tell me.” Venturing into a potentially volatile subject was risky, but it was best to keep him talking.
“Did he say that? How nice of him.” Kale tried to hide a smile. He and Willow had formed their own odd relationship while I was away. It definitely piqued my curiosity.
“He said that you’re my second. And that Shya’s been sending you to look for the scroll. Willow thinks we need to talk about that, and as much as I’d like to avoid it, I have to agree with him. So…start talking.”
An amused grin spread across Kale’s handsome face. Mischief shone in his eyes. It was a good indicator that he was slipping into that strange place where vampires go to hunt and kill, an inevitable side effect of being around the power I’d called. I really hoped we could just talk without me having to knock him out.
Kale seemed to be weighing his words, considering where to start or how much to tell me. Finally he said, “I stopped an assassination attempt on Arys while you were both out of town. A rebel group formed. They were plotting to kill him upon your return home. I made sure they never had a chance to try it.”
He stopped, allowing me a chance to process this information. It wasn’t easy to take in. I sat heavily on the end of the couch near Jez’s feet and stared at him, stunned. “Why?” I asked, taking a deep, calming breath. “Why would you want to help Arys?”
“Shya instructed me to do it,” he confessed, hanging his head as if ashamed. “But I didn’t do it for him. I did it for you.”
I swallowed hard, “Is this why I found one of your victims propped up by the front door?”
“Shya said I should make it clear to the city that I’m your second in command. The most powerful next only to you and Arys. It felt wrong when he said it. Once I started killing the rebel group, that changed. I guess not everyone is happy with that. I do want to back you, Alexa. Which is why I’ve been helping Shya find the scroll. You need to find it first.” The smile faded from Kale’s face, and he gazed at me with thinly veiled adoration. “It’s not just him though. The vampires, the rebels, they’re unpredictable. That incident at the Kiss when you got up close and personal with a stake…that’s not over. Now that Lilah’s gone, they’re feeling liberated and anarchistic.”
I was bombarded by thoughts and feelings. It was disconcerting to hear about the rebel group. I’d seen it before though, when a vampire had violently tried to plunge a stake in my heart while vowing to never be my slave. “I’m not Lilah. I don’t want to rule over them. I just want to maintain a sense of order. It would be nice to have just one week where someone didn’t want to kill me.” I was overwhelmed by everything he’d just said. He could have let the rebel group take their shot at Arys. I wouldn’t blame him for wanting that. “Shya must know that he can’t trust you. Be careful, Kale.”
“That’s just another reason why we need to keep our distance. He’s watching us.”
“I know. He proved that earlier tonight when he sent Brook to Father Andrew’s church. He’s going to make it tough to hunt this thing down.” I chewed my lower lip, lost in thought. There had to be a way to escape Shya’s watchful eye. “He thinks I’m going to die before he has a chance to use me as a sacrifice. Is it wrong that I kind of want it to happen?”
Kale frowned. “You don’t mean that. Giving in isn’t like you. Don’t you dare go down without a fight.”
I laughed softly. “If it wouldn’t drive you crazy, I would hug you right now. Thank you for caring in spite of everything.”
“Don’t thank me.” He waved away my gratitude. “I’m not a good guy. I wanted to let them try for Arys. Believe me, it was hard not to join in on that action.”
“I know,” I said, nodding in understanding. “But you didn’t. So you are a good guy. Still.”
Kale smiled then, a wistful action that reminded me of the sweet-natured guy he used to be. “Let’s not kid ourselves. I haven’t been a good guy in over five hundred years.”
Before I could tell him how wrong he was, Jez sat up suddenly with a loud gasp. She groped about in a disoriented stupor. “I think I’m gonna be sick,” she groaned, falling off the couch with a thud.
Kale and I both sprang into action. We got her up and moving toward the bathroom. Her balance was off, and she leaned heavily on me.
“It’s ok. I’ve got this,” I said, waving Kale away. “I’ll take care of the hair holding. Do you have something she can wear after I throw her in the shower?”
“Yeah, no problem. I’ll put some clean sheets on the bed too.”
No sooner had I gotten Jez into the bathroom and closed the door than she proceeded to vomit. I stood close enough to hold her hair back while she clutched the toilet.
Jez struggled to catch her breath. “Oh my God. Am I dead? Is this hell?”
“Not even close. It’s Kale’s bathroom.”
Another round of vomiting had me cringing. It was amazing the things people would do to themselves in the search for escape. I was no exception. I’d done my fair share of stupid shit.
“I feel like death. I’m such a fucking idiot.” She clutched the porcelain in a white-knuckled grip. Her body trembled, and she moaned, “Just put me out of my misery, Lex. Please. I’m begging you.”
“You’re starting to sound like Kale.” I winced when my voice echoed in the acoustics of the bathroom. “Sorry, Jez. You’re going to have to suffer before you’ll feel like yourself again. Come on. Let’s get you into the shower.”
The sounds of agony and distress never stopped. Every move she made had Jez groaning and gasping with more than a little cursing thrown in the mix. I dug around in the cupboard under the sink and managed to find some mouthwash and a comb. Kale was definitely lacking in the way of female-friendly vanity items.
After getting Jez dressed in some sweatpants and a t-shirt provided by Kale, I dragged the comb through her hair while she sat on the closed toilet lid. “Are you feeling any better?” I asked, carefully picking my way through her golden tangles.
“I feel like I’ve been turned inside out. It’s unbearable.” Her voice was soft, lacking her usual feisty enthusiasm.
“You know, eventually I’m going to grill you about tonight. But I’ll give you time to sleep it off and recover first. Then I’ll expect some honest answers.”
“I suppose that’s fair.” Jez was quiet for a moment. “Thanks, Lex. For taking care of me tonight.”
“That’s what friends do. I love you, Jez. Which is why I’m so damn worried about what I saw tonight. You really scared us.”
She was quiet for so long that I grew worried. I finished up with her hair and stood there, searching for the right words. Jez turned to face me, tears glistening in her glassy, green eyes.
“I don’t know what’s going on with me. I don’t even know who I am lately.” Jez looked so forlorn, so lost. “I’m scared.”
I pulled her into a hug, clutching her trembling frame tight against me. My wolf was eager to soothe her. Our beasts shared a connection that required no words. I would have given just about anything to ease her pain.
“I’m here for you,” I promised. “So is Kale. We’ll walk with you through this.”
“I was just starting to let myself get used to the idea of having someone who understood me. Someone who I didn’t have to play human for. We had this connection. It was better than I could have hoped. And then it was gone.” Tears spilled down Jez’s cheeks, and she clung to me like a lost child.
It took all my strength to blink back the tears of empathy that welled up. I wanted to fall apart with her. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, stroking her wet hair. “I’m so sorry.”
The night was fading fast by the time I got her into bed in the guest room on the main floor. I knew that Kale had a downstairs bedroom, but judging by the heavily covered window, it appeared as if he’d been spending some time there.
Jez was still pretty out of it, mumbling things that made sense to nobody but her. Being in Kale’s bedroom was awkward. Even more so when Jez begged me to lay with her.
I glanced at Kale who stood silent in the doorway. He wore a pained expression as he gazed at Jez. “You should stay with her a while. I’ll wait in the living room.” He disappeared, leaving me staring after his shadow as it retreated down the hall.
Shrugging out of my jacket, I laid it and the Dragon Claw on a chair near the door. Then I crawled in beside Jez and pulled her close. She settled in against me, her fingers curling in my hair.
It shook me to the bone to see her this way. She was one of the strongest people I knew. Nobody was safe from the repercussions of love. Cheesy romance movies paint a picture of a big love moment followed by a happily ever after. That simply isn’t reality. Love comes at a price, and it is never without challenge.
Lying there in Kale’s bed with the feel of him all around me, I thought about the many trials and complications of love. If only it were as cut and dried as the whole boy meets girl crap.
Jez mumbled, a soft murmur into the pillow. “Don’t leave me alone with him. It’s not safe. He’s a killer.”
“Jezzy, your blood reeks like a cocktail of poisons. There’s nothing enticing about it. Besides, it’s Kale. Of course you’re safe with him. I promise.”
“He’s like Jekyll and Hyde. I never know which one I’m dealing with.” Her eyes were closed, and she began to breathe deeply as slumber dragged her under.
I said nothing, knowing that Kale could hear us. In no time Jez began to snore softly. I stayed until I was sure she wouldn’t wake up, then carefully disengaged myself from her grasp. Trying to be quiet, I moved with silent footsteps to gather my jacket and dagger. With a look back at Jez, I hoped I was doing the right thing by leaving her with Kale. He loved her like a sister, and though he’d hurt her once, I trusted his devotion to her was strong enough to keep that from happening again.
I hoped that when I was vampire I would still see her as family, as pack. Though we were very different beasts, we shared so much. I never wanted to lose that.
Kale was in the living room, staring out the window at the fading night. “Do you need a ride?” He didn’t look at me when he spoke. There was a hard set to his shoulders. He was stiff and uncomfortable.
“No, I’ll call a cab. You should stay with Jez.” I hesitated, watching him closely. “You know she didn’t mean that, Kale. She’s not really afraid of you.”
When he continued to avoid my gaze, I knew for certain that’s what had him so tightly coiled. “She should be. I’ve given her good reason to fear me.”
“It’s just the drugs talking.”
“Is it?” He did look at me then. His mismatched eyes were haunted.
“Who was that guy back at The Spirit Room?” I asked, hoping to redirect his focus. “Or more importantly,
what
was he? Is there something going on there that we should be paying more attention to?”
Kale shook his head. “Don’t worry about The Spirit Room. Things will take care of themselves there. Keep your attention on what matters. Shya and the rebel vampires. The guy getting high with Jez is a nephilim. The offspring of an angel or demon and a human. Nothing to worry about for the most part.”