Sex in a Coffin (Kismet Knight, Vampire Psychologist) (4 page)

Devereux joined me on the couch. He met my gaze, then pointed at Laurence and Elliott. “I do not know how to begin to apologize for their extremely poor judgment and atrocious behavior. I can only imagine what harm they have done to my standing with you and the trust we have been building. They will atone for their lack of civility and respect.” He glared at them. “Stand up!”

They stumbled to their feet, lips pressed tightly together, eyes wary.

“Laurence, tell Dr. Knight how sorry you are and be specific about what you are apologizing for.” Devereux’s tone of voice held a dangerous edge.

“I... I’m sorry, Dr. Knight. Uh, Elliott and I thought it would be fun to give you the wrong idea about the trip Father has planned. We lied about everything, well, except the part about him taking you to Paris. There is no dark ritual in the catacombs. You’re his first human girlfriend. I guess we didn’t think it through very well.”

“Elliott?” Devereux said in that same, ominous tone.

“Er, yeah, Dr. Knight. Sorry. We thought we could catch up with you and clear your memory before Father found out.”

“Are you saying you are only sorry that you got caught, offspring?” The pitch of Devereux’s voice rose and he stared daggers at Elliott.

“No! No, that’s not what I meant. Well, yes, it
is
what I meant, but now that you mention it, I see the problem.” Elliott twisted his hands. “We were stupid and thoughtless. We didn’t mean to hurt or upset you, Dr. Knight. We’re glad Father has found you, even if you’re not immortal. We told him a perfect woman existed for him, and here you are. There is only one true mate, and no murder ceremony involved. But we
are
vampires. You can’t expect us to act like humans...”

“Silence!” Devereux yelled, then returned his attention to me again. “I realize this is not nearly enough, my love, and I assure you they have not yet begun to feel the full extent of my wrath, which will be memorable and ongoing, but are you satisfied with their explanations for now? Are you willing to allow me to straighten out all the lies and misinformation they gave you?”

They all looked at me, waiting.

“We really
are
assholes,” Laurence said, trying to look serious.

“Yes you are.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

They nodded.

“And you manipulated me. You frightened me, made me doubt Devereux, and raised serious concerns about whether or not I ever want to see the two of you again, even if you are his offspring.” I was glad my voice sounded strong and steady. “I don’t usually condone violence, but in this case I’ll make an exception.”

“We’re sorry,” they said.

Elliott gave an apologetic shrug. “We don’t spend a lot of time around humans, so it’s easy to see mortals as food and playthings.”

“Elliott!” Devereux barked.

“It’s true, Father. She needs to know,” Laurence added.

Thanks to my clients, I’d already begun to figure that part out. “So, you’re saying you lied? Devereux never intended to hurt me?”

“Yes, we lied,” they said in unison.

“Father won’t even hurt humans he doesn’t like, much less one he loves.” Laurence’s lips spread in an ‘aren’t I charming?’ smile. “Please believe us.”

“You’ve got to be kidding.” Too tired to participate in their childish antics any longer, I wanted the night to end. If they thought they could continue to manipulate me, they were mistaken. “I’d like you to go now. I can wholeheartedly say it wasn’t nice meeting you.”

They opened their mouths to speak as Devereux, quick as lightning, appeared in front of them. Grabbing their hair, he ripped off their heads with a horrible, wet sound. Their bodies collapsed into bloody piles, their heads nearby.

Shocked speechless, I sucked in all the air in the room. Trembling, my eyes went wide, my gut knotted. I fought vomit.

He flicked his fingers nonchalantly at them. “Be gone.”

And they were – spewing blood and all.

“Jesus, Devereux!” I sputtered, looking at the massive red stains on my carpet and walls. “You just killed your children. What...” If my legs hadn’t been noodles, I’d have bolted out my front door. The smell was so overwhelming I gagged. What kind of horrible relationship did he have with his offspring if he could reduce them to headless corpses? I knew vampires were violent, but having it rubbed in my face was over the top.

Just as quickly he returned to sit next to me and gathered me into his arms. Overwhelmed again by vampire insanity – scared and disgusted – I fought to push him away. He clutched me tighter, murmuring softly. Blood glistened on his leather pants. “No. Please listen. Decapitation is a usual punishment for them. They expect no less.”

“Decapitation is a usual punishment?” My voice dripped incredulity. “In what universe?”

“In mine.” He radiated calm, as if we were discussing shoes.

“They actually expect you to brutalize them? To abuse them?” I couldn’t wrap my brain around the absurd concept. Although I did have clients who wanted the same.

He frowned and tilted his head, appearing confused. “Those words do not have the same meaning to vampires as to humans. I can say with certainty that Laurence and Elliott enjoy physical pain. I am not being facetious when I tell you they look forward to it. But, since I now see their elaborate performance for what it was – a way to achieve desired masochistic results – I will be more selective with their punishments. I fear I have reinforced a negative pattern, as your psychology says.”

I shook my head. “I’ve heard a lot of crazy things in my therapy office, but you’ve managed to raise the bar on lunacy. Why not just stake them, while you’re at it?”

He shrugged, as if that was a reasonable question, and actually answered. “I have staked them often, but beheading gives them time to think about their wrongdoing while they heal the wound.”

Heal the wound?
I tried to imagine them grasping around for their heads in whatever location he’d sent them to.

“I transported them to the cages underneath The Crypt. They can indulge their drama there,” he answered my unvoiced thought and gazed into my eyes. “Since it is clear I have frightened you, I apologize for not alerting you in advance of my plans. It was a spur-of-the-moment decision.” He stroked his hand down my hair. “It is easy to forget how different our two worlds are. I promise I will be much more thoughtful in the future. I will try very hard not to rip anyone apart in front of you without warning.”

I inhaled a deep breath, still trying to calm my thudding heartbeat and shaking hands. “Gee, thanks,” I said, sarcastically.

He leaned back and studied my face, having missed my snarky tone. “You are welcome. But I would not blame you for being even less trusting after this. Have I ruined everything?” He gave me his tortured, dark angel look.

Part of me wanted to scream ‘Fuck, yeah!’ because he
had
scared the shit out of me. Any illusions I’d had that vampires were merely humans with fangs, had long since evaporated, but I remained pretty clueless about the true alien nature of their reality. Ever since I met Devereux, I’d been asking myself if it was even possible for a human brain to process such a bizarre experience. Maybe we didn’t have the synapses for it. Was vampire research really that important to me? Was Devereux?

I looked at his worried face and my shoulders slumped. How could anyone be expected to deal with such horror? But in his defense, he’d been crystal clear about the differences between the living and the undead. He never tried to paint a pretty picture or deny the harsh truths. Had I been guilty of seeing only what I wanted to see? Could I hold him responsible for the sick actions of his vampire cohorts or the characteristics of vampires in general? Could I ever trust him?

I finally forced my body to relax and released a heavy breath with a sigh. “I don’t know, Devereux. My psyche might not be strong enough for all this madness. You don’t know what they said...” I was very fond of the Master, but the benefits of hanging out with bloodsuckers had taken a nosedive.

He looked at me, his expression sad. “I read the lies in their minds, and yours. I know what they told you.” He took my hand. “Even if they had not entranced you, the story might have been convincing to someone who is struggling to trust me and my world.”

“Why did you tell Luna
it was time
for you to take me to Paris? That seemed to fit with what Laurence and Elliott had said.” Remembering his words to his snarly assistant made my chest hurt.

“Tell Luna...?” He tilted his head and paused for a few seconds, looking perplexed. “When did I... oh!” He nodded, his brows raised. “Yes. I remember. She has been trying to convince me that this is not the best time for me to be away from the club, that she cannot run things without me, which is utter nonsense. She was being difficult. That is what I meant by saying it was time.”

“Did you really plan to take me to the catacombs?” My heart tripped at the memory of the offspring’s scary tale.

“No.” He shook his head vehemently. “I would never take you there. I have extremely unpleasant memories of that miserable site. It is indeed a place of death and torture, which I experienced first-hand. The hidden caverns are the stuff of nightmares for me, of which my troublemaking friends are well aware. That is probably why they chose that location for their deceit. But Paris is beautiful. I lived there many times and look forward to sharing it with you. Or at least I
did
before Laurence and Elliott’s interference.” He slowly blinked his turquoise eyes, then locked his gaze onto mine. “I never got the chance to ask you to come to Paris with me. And now you probably will not even consider it...”

We stared at each other for a few seconds. The scent of blood permeated the air.

He had the unfair advantage of being able to read my thoughts, but nothing in his expression or his energy set off my intuitive alarms. I was pretty sure he was telling the truth. And prior to hearing his children’s terrible story, I would have been thrilled to go to Paris with Devereux. We’d spoken briefly about traveling together when my schedule permitted. Did it make any sense for me to voluntarily join the terrifying world of the undead and then balk because of juvenile vampire trickery? I studied his perfect features and had to admit he was quite loveable. Now that I was calm and rational again, maybe it was time I took a step toward trusting him.

He must have heard something he liked in my head, because a wide grin burst across his lips. “You would do that for me?” He pulled me tighter against him again. “I am the luckiest male on the planet.”

I struggled out of his grasp and pushed him away. “Hold on! Not so fast. I have questions.”

He released me and leaned back into the couch cushions. “But of course. My apologies.” He gave a quick nod and tried to look serious.

Was I really considering this? Things moved so fast on Devereux’s side of the Looking Glass.

“First, I want to make sure nothing like what went on tonight with Laurence and Elliott ever happens again. I want assurances that no other vampires will use, humiliate or manipulate me in any way. Ever. I want you to set clear boundaries.” I glared at him. “Their behavior made me less than human, and that’s what I am, Devereux: human. They tried to make me a puppet, and I won’t let that happen, not for their amusement, not even for this... this
thing
between us.”

He nodded. “You have my word. In fact...” He closed his eyes for a few seconds then reopened them. “I just sent a reaffirming command to every vampire in Colorado, forbidding them from showing you any disrespect or harming you in any way. The consequence for breaking that command is too harsh to share with you. And I will convey the message to a wider audience over the next few nights. I personally guarantee your safety.” He looked so distraught and chastised, it was impossible not to believe he meant it.

But what if I’m being foolish?
“I don’t know...”

“You are right.” He gave a curt nod. “All is ruined now. I should never have introduced you to Laurence and Elliott. I will regret it forever.” He stepped away, all emotion wiped from his face. “I will leave now.”

“Leave? No, wait!” I moved toward him and grabbed his arm. What a moody guy! “I didn’t say everything was ruined. I just needed to think for a minute.”

His eyes widened as he obviously read my thoughts. “Really? You would be so forgiving? I am humbled.”

“Humble is good. I
want
to believe you...”

He tilted his head endearingly, and appeared to be holding the breath he didn’t need to take. “Please trust me. I cannot guarantee I will not make mistakes, but I am committed to learning from them.”

I gazed into his turquoise eyes and the remaining resistance melted away. “All right.” I relented, deciding to throw caution – and maybe rationality – to the wind. What was the worst that could happen? I’d be ritually sacrificed in a tourist attraction or drained atop a Parisian landmark. Nothing out of the ordinary. Just another insane day in the preternatural asylum. “I’ll hold you to that.”

“Thank you.” He leaned in and kissed me, long enough for me to worry about my ability to remain vertical, before letting go.

The muscles between my legs clenched and I fanned myself.
Best kisser in the universe.
“So, what’s the timing for the trip?”

 “Now. Tonight.” He grinned and clasped my hand, his eyes sparkling.

 “Now? But it’s daytime in France. How can you—”

“You forget that I am able to travel both through space
and
time. We can journey back or forward in time, as frequently as we wish, and see every landmark and point of interest you desire.”

I couldn’t help but smile at his hopeful expression and the possibility of visiting places I’d only read about. There was still nothing in his energy or his manner to raise concern. My intuition gave me a thumbs-up. I stared at him for a few more seconds, just to make sure I wasn’t missing any slow-arriving inner guidance, then nodded. “Okay. I’d love to go to Paris. I’m trusting you.”

Have I totally lost my mind?

“You honor me.” The muscles of his face relaxed. “I swear you will be safe and well. We will share an extended night in France and I promise to show you as much of the beauty there as possible before you get tired.”