***
Wynn stared at her pack, stuffed full of everything she would need for her journey. Clothes of all kinds; leggings, trousers, shirts, tunics, jerkins, socks and undergarments. Medicines for blisters, salves for wounds, needle and thread for darning and sewing up gashes. A range of daggers, thick ones, thin ones, tiny ones that could not really do much damage but would be easily hidden if the occasion arose. Then the things she had carried with her from the beginning, the rebec Medea had given her, the book of Necromancy and her outfit from Wolf. It was a strange collection, much more extravagant than what she had been used to. She had travelled vast distances with Arabella with much less than this and survived. It seemed preposterous that she would need so much, but she did not argue; she was not experienced enough for her opinion to count. All that was missing was food and water; she would collect them later, when Salina had finished preparing them.
Wynn pondered what she was facing. She would be leaving this life, this undoubted luxury for an unknown future, in a land she had never heard of, with a man she barely knew. By all accounts it was a terrifying and foolish prospect, and it was only because she could see the sense in it, and trusted Taien more implicitly than was probably reasonable that she had agreed at all. Taien had been vague on the specifics and Wynn wondered whether he knew himself. They were to travel east towards the coast, and from there board a ship to his homeland, from there the facts became slightly ambiguous. She had to force herself to just accept that she could not know everything.
At least I have somewhere to go, Wynn thought. She contemplated the students who now all had to find shelter and a place to stay. Some could return home to their rich and influential parents, but for most the journey was too long, they would have to pretend to be orphans and get jobs in the nearest towns, as prentices, in shops, in the dyer houses, anywhere they could find employment. From there it would be a waiting game, Irik had promised them resolutely when everything was over he, and the other professors would return to the Seminary and rebuild it and make it their home once more. It was a good plan on paper, but if it would work would remain to be seen. The key to its success was for the students to keep their magic hidden, magic was completely forbidden in the lands and if they wanted to be able to return to the Seminary they had to remain Free.
It was a sorry state of affairs. They were all separating to follow their own paths. Wynn pondered her friend Arabella; she had pledged herself to help Irik by travelling to the other Nations and begging or demanding for aid in the coming war. Wynn knew Arabella could be persuasive, whether through fear or her beauty it did not matter, either way having Arabella with him Irik was sure to get the help he required. Yet Wynn found it hard to accept, Arabella had always been with her through everything, the hard times and the happier times, protecting her, standing by her; their separation marked the beginning of the end. And of Nethali, she would have to go alone on her travels, as a representative of the Seminary and of Berhandril. It would do no good if she travelled with Irik, they needed her to go alone and bring reinforcements. It was a dangerous plan and one Irik disagreed with furiously, but they all saw the logic of it; Aerona had access to as many men as she wished, not to mention her army of Fallen and finding an opposing army would be difficult in Inlo and its neighbouring lands. They needed to travel further to places Wynn had never heard of.
All this because of Wynn; she still bitterly regretted her actions but she knew that in some way or another Irik, Nethali and Arabella would have left the Seminary to do just this. She had only speeded the process up. Wynn was beginning to accept that it was unavoidable, there could be no light without the dark and sad things would always happen no matter how powerful she became. Lady Fate had a plan, and Wynn would have to accept it.
Wynn sighed deeply and left her room in search of the kitchens to collect her supplies. The corridors had been patched up in the few days after the attack, the rubble was deposited and the whole place swept, but it was a mockery of what once stood. Wynn still could not quite bring herself to look at the destruction. She walked, head down, to the kitchen. When she reached it Salina greeted her warmly, she did not blame Wynn for what had happened to the Seminary, she had known Wynn before the darkness took hold and Wynn’s explanation had been more than enough to satisfy her questions. Wynn wished it had been as easy with the other servants and students.
“Hello Wynn!” Salina smiled, busy kneading dough on the counter, her hands and arms, and much of her face smothered in flour, “your supplies are over there, I have probably baked and cooked too much but I fear you will lose even more weight in your travels and I cannot have that on my conscious.”
Wynn laughed and looked at the pile of supplies, cooked meat – salted heavily to preserve them – crusty bread, nuts and berries, smoked fish, hard biscuits and a selection of spices to flavour the food. The meat and fish would have to be consumed hastily for they would not keep for long, but the bread and nuts and biscuits would last for many days. Wynn wondered if there was a town midway in their travels, she mentally logged it as a question to ask Taien. She gathered the supplies in her arms and turned to Salina.
“Thank you, I appreciate it Salina,” she said softly.
“Oh child, it is the least I could do,” Salina stepped away from the dough and placed her hands gently on Wynn’s face, “you are a good girl and have had such a hard life. I see only happiness in your future, when everything is done.”
Wynn smiled weakly and ducked her head so Salina would not see her tears, surprised they had come at all. It was all she could do not to weep, she mumbled a hoarse thank you and left hurriedly; she did not want their last meeting to be one of sadness. Wynn was sure of one thing, any more goodbyes and she would shatter, she was leaving everyone who she loved, or could eventually love behind and it was tearing her apart. Wynn walked through the corridor, forcing her tears to stop flowing; she knew it would be too hard to stop if she let them fall much longer. It was an effort but eventually they stopped and she was left to float through the halls, not really sure how she felt. All the students were in their room’s trying to pack their whole life in a small bag and she met no one for a long while. So when Taien turned the corner a long moment later Wynn did not really notice him.
“Wynn!” He called. She raised her head to the sound of her name and spotted Taien walking towards her. Wynn smiled weakly and nodded her head in response, shuffling her supplies in her arms so they were more comfortable to hold. When they got closer to each other Wynn could not help study Taien, in the light of the morning, his brown mop of hair that never really stayed where it should, his big brown eyes that were always watchful but seemed to hide a sadness, the stubble across his chin and jaw and his tanned skin. He was beautiful really, now that Wynn looked. As soon as she had though it Wynn glanced up to see Taien’s reaction, prepared for it, but he was not paying her thoughts any attention, instead he was stifling a laugh.
“What?” Wynn questioned, feeling self conscious.
“You were just with Salina?” He replied.
Wynn lifted her supplies, an obvious clue, “Yes, why?”
Taien laughed now, not bothering to hide it, clearly very amused, “You should go and find a mirror Wynn, you look decidedly funny.”
Wynn shifted the supplies to one arm and raised her fingertips to her face gingerly, not sure what she would find. Lifting her hand away she glanced at her fingertips and saw they were pure white. She frowned in confusion, then remembered that Salina had been kneading dough just a moment before and had touched her face when they said goodbye. Wynn flushed an impressive shade of red and could not decide whether to run away or stand and try and wipe it off, either option left the door open for further embarrassment. Taien laughed again, sensing her intentions and emotions. He stepped forward and gently using his thumb, wiped most of the flour away from both cheeks. Wynn’s eyes widened at the touch but she allowed it to continue, unsure exactly how it made her feel.
He stepped back after a moment, “I cannot get it all off.”
“Thank you,” Wynn said hoarsely and darted away to pack her things, feeling suddenly wobbly. Men did not touch her so gently; it was not the done thing. Taien challenged everything she believed, men were not so kind and respectful, she was so unused to it that it made her feel quite lost in the world. Griffin, Jareth and Byron had been kind to her, and protected her, but none had touched her like Taien just had, gently and kindly, it was so odd. Everything she thought she knew was all being proved wrong, women were not objects, and men were not in charge, magic was real and she could do what she wished with her life. It was not the Master’s choice anymore.
She walked a little taller as strode through the halls. When she reached her room she packed the supplies away and lifted the pack to test it.
It was heavy, and dug into her shoulder but it was nothing she had not experienced on the way to the Seminary and she would have to get used to it very quickly.
Arabella knocked on Wynn’s door late that evening, radiating so many emotions that at first Wynn was unsure exactly what was wrong. It was a violent and urgent knock, one not meant to be subtle and Wynn could not help but be concerned. Unconsciously, as she took a moment to collect her thoughts, Wynn surrounded herself in the different feelings, enjoying the sensation. She was around Taien and Irik too much, the silence of their bodies still managed to unsettle her, it was so wrong not to know exactly how someone was feeling, and have that feeling pressed upon you so that you felt it too. Wynn had to take a deep breath under the pressure of the emotions before she could make her way across the room.
The air blew Arabella’s hair around her face as Wynn opened the door; her face was etched in a frown. Wynn could not help, as she did almost every time she glanced at Arabella, but inspect her. Her soft olive skin and black cascade of hair that framed her face; her brown eyes that reminded Wynn of the many hued tree barks that surrounded the Seminary; her thin and lithe form from years of combat. She was a complete beautify, but now her face was twisted in a frown and she looked tired. Arabella strode into the room, not waiting to be invited and paced across the floor, arms folded across her chest. Wynn closed the door slowly and turned to face Arabella, leaning back on it and waiting for Arabella to calm down and for her emotions to solidify in one direction. Many things possessed Wynn in the time it took Arabella to calm down, anger, which frightened Wynn, her memories of rage were not happy ones and she had to force herself to push the emotion from her body; fear, gut wrenching terror that was so strong that she found it hard to breathe, despite not knowing why she was afraid. Sadness, a sadness that threatened to unbalance Wynn and drive her to sobbing, it was this emotion that was dominate and in the many moments it took for Arabella’s emotions to take a solid path Wynn could hear why. Arabella was practically screaming in her head, “
I don’t want to leave you
!” Wynn was surprised that Arabella’s emotions and thoughts had taken this direction. Arabella was the one that showed nothing, was unbelievably strong and private and here she was practically pouring her soul out in front of Wynn.
In the times Wynn had spent with Arabella, she was an unemotional mask, a lifetime of pain had taught her well enough that showing your sadness changed nothing, and revealing anything would be perceived as weakness in the wrong hands. It was safer to show nothing, get close to no one, and carry on life with a blank expression. Knowing this, Wynn understood this moment was too tender for words, and even though Arabella could feel Wynn’s surprise and slip of pity and understanding, it was not enough just to rely on that. She had to say something, so she sent her magic into Arabella’s mind and spoke to her through there, “
Arabella, I know how you are feeling, and I can assure that I feel it just as keenly, but tell me, why did you come
?”
Arabella stopped pacing just long enough to cast Wynn a withering look before returning to her frenzied walking, “
Wynn, I have never told you this, and if you repeat it I will gladly beat you to death, but I love you and the thought of leaving you kills me. I have seen you suffer and for so long did not know if you could pull through and now you are well and yourself again and we must part. My life has been spent getting close to no one, and it is no secret that when I first met you I disliked you intensely, how did you get into my heart?! I let no one inside but you found a way, I can’t even begin to – I mean – you don’t understand
...” Arabella trailed off inside her head and let her feelings and memories flow through the link so that both of them were surrounded. Wynn understood Arabella’s sadness, their friendship was one that had begun on such difficult grounds and yet they had come to love each other fiercely. They needed each other and depended on each other in a way that Wynn had never experienced. She had never had such a friend, save Braelyn, and it was a bittersweet thing. Wordlessly Wynn sent memories back and walked over to Arabella and embraced her. At the touch neither could keep their tears from falling. They fell to the floor, clutching each other and wept until they could cry no more.
Wynn woke at the light of the dawn, tangled together with Arabella, a mess of black hair and limbs. She sat up and glanced at her friend. How could she knowingly leave her? A friend that was so much more than that, a sister, part of her that could never be replaced, it hurt to even consider it and yet she was walking away from her. It took Wynn a moment to gather herself; she did not wish to cry again. When she was sure she was strong enough she detangled herself and walked over to the window to glance at the grounds. Being on the bottom floor all she should have seen was the curtain wall, but that was now crumbled leaving a view of the grounds. Past the rubble she could see they were still battle scarred and scorch marked, the trees nearest the grounds were scratched and broken, and behind that the forest stretched far into the distance, black and thick and ominous. It was through these woods that she and Taien would venture through, to a land Wynn had never heard of, not that that was a surprise, Wynn had only ever heard of Inlo, and the few towns big enough to be named. What of all those which existed but she never knew about? So much undiscovered because of her ignorance, what would she do without Arabella to guide her?
“Yes, what will you do?” Arabella said from behind her. Wynn smiled and turned around to see Arabella smiling back, but it was a smile hiding a great sadness and Wynn completely forgot that Arabella had answered a thought instead of something said aloud. It was the unspoken rules of etiquette that one did not answer a thought, and normally Wynn bristled at such a thing, for Arabella had a tendency to do just that, but at this moment it did not bother her, it was hard enough to speak aloud that she welcomed any conversation through her mind. She pondered Arabella’s question, what
would
she do?
“I suppose I will have to survive,” she said, her voice suddenly hoarse. It was too difficult to think about, she would have to survive and that was that. Subtly Wynn allowed Arabella’s emotions wash over her softly; Arabella was cold and tired but completely alert. She understood what she had woken to; the morning of their departure. Neither could say it but it hung in the air, after this morning who knew if they would see each other again? At this thought Arabella stood up briskly and nodded her head before striding from the room. Wynn let her go wordlessly, the moment did not need words, what was emanating from both of them was powerful enough to bring her to tears and she could not have spoken even if she had wished it. None wished for more goodbyes, it was too final. After this morning who knew if they would survive? Sighing Wynn too left the room, locking it, and made her way to the bathhouse for what would be the last time.