Shadowed: Brides of the Kindred book 8 (46 page)

Without waiting for a reply, she pushed him off her—out of her—and rolled away. Before he could say anything, she got off the bed and left the room.

Chapter Thirty-six

“Nina?” He followed her into the living area but kept his distance because she so obviously didn’t want to be touched.

She was standing across the room from him, beside the couch. She was still naked with her arms wrapped protectively around herself. He couldn’t help loving the view she presented—her full ass and hips with the tiny dimples just below her waist. He wondered if she had any idea how beautiful she was, how desirable.

He wondered if she’d meant what she said.

“Nina,” he began in a low voice.

“I shouldn’t have said that,” she said, still not facing him. “Shouldn’t have let myself feel it, and I sure as hell shouldn’t have said it. Never in a million years.”

“Yes, you should,” Reddix murmured. “Because I needed to hear it. And because…I want to say it back to you. Want to say I love you too.”

“Don’t.” She half turned her head, meeting his eyes briefly before looking away again. “Don’t. It only makes it worse.”

Reddix felt like his heart was in his throat.

“I’m sorry. So Goddess damned sorry I can’t give you what you need…can’t be the male you need me to be,” he told her in a low, choked voice.

“All I ever wanted was to heal you.” She looked down at the ground, her hair sweeping over her shoulders like a long, dark shawl. “I felt it from that very first dream we shared—felt that you needed something, something maybe only I could give you. Even Mehoo-Jimmy’s message to me made me think it. ‘Heal the bear’—that was what she said.”

“Nina…”

“But in the end, I couldn’t even heal myself.” Her soft voice was bitter and so filled with hurt he ached just to hear it. “Couldn’t stop myself from loving you or heal my heart when leaving you broke it.”

Reddix yearned to take her in his arms, to feel her soft form pressed against his both giving and receiving comfort. He wanted to stroke her hair and whisper in her ear that everything would be all right. That he would love her forever even if they couldn’t do anything about it. But he was frozen in place, paralyzed by the knowledge that she didn’t want his touch, that she didn’t need to be hurt any more than he’d already hurt her.

Still, he wanted to caress her so much, even in a small way. If he could just sweep the curtain of hair away from her face and see her expression.

If he could just
touch
her…

* * * * *

Nina felt his fingers brushing feather-light against her temple, stroking the hair from her face and sliding gently down her throat.

“Don’t,” she whispered, not looking at him. “Don’t do that—don’t touch me.”

“I’m nowhere near you.”

Nina had supposed he was right behind her, but surprisingly, his voice seemed to be coming from the other side of the room.

Turning, she stared at him. “Then what was that I felt?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know—what
did
you feel?”

“I felt your hands on me—your fingers—brushing my hair away from my face, stroking my neck.”

“You
what?”
His voice was slightly strangled. “Are you serious?”

She frowned. “Of course I’m serious. Why would I make something like that up? You even moved my hair…or
something
did anyway. How did that happen?”

He shook his head. “I don’t know. I was just standing here, thinking how much I wanted to touch you, thinking that I wanted to move your hair so I could see your face…” His eyes widened. “No…it can’t be.”

“Can’t be what?” she asked impatiently.

“Don’t move.” He looked at her intently, his silver eyes narrowed to slits. “Just stand there for a minute and don’t move.”

“Stand here and do what? What are you…?” Suddenly, she felt his fingers again, stroking over the side of her face and cupping her cheek. The sensation was as real as though he was actually touching her, yet, he was still standing across the room. “Reddix?” she whispered, putting a hand up to her face. There was nothing to feel, but she still had the sensation of invisible fingers stroking her skin.

“Did you feel that?” he asked hoarsely. “Gods, Nina, please tell me you felt that.”

“I felt…something. An invisible hand cupping my cheek?”

“That was no invisible hand—it was my
whisper fingers.
I
Touched
you, Nina. I actually
Touched
you.”

She knew at once what he meant and her heart started to pound.

“Quick,” she urged. “Do it again.”

“Close your eyes,” he instructed. “And describe what you feel.”

Nina closed her eyes obediently and clenched her fists at her sides, waiting. What would he do next? Could this really be happening? Could he really…

Then a gentle finger was sliding around her nipple, tugging it playfully and making her moan with surprised pleasure. Her hand went to her breast involuntarily and her eyes flew open.

“Reddix?”

“I can tell you felt that.” He grinned at her, one eyebrow arched rakishly. “How did you like it?”

“It feels amazing,” Nina said. “But what does it mean?”

“It means…” He took a deep breath. “I
think
it means my Touch Sense has finally turned itself around. It’s not inverted anymore.”

“So then your RTS…?”

“Is cured, if I’m right.” He closed his eyes. “Hold on a minute—let me concentrate. The people in the suite next to ours were having a fight earlier and I could ‘hear’ everything they were feeling. So let me just…” His voice trailed off, and Nina could see the intense look of concentration as he focused on the people in the next suite.

“Well?” she asked after a minute, unable to help herself anymore. “What do you feel? What do
they
feel?”

“I have no idea.” When he opened his eyes they were glowing with excitement. “It’s gone—it’s all gone. I can’t feel or hear any emotions anymore but my own.”

Nina shook her head in wonder. “That’s amazing. But how…?”

“I think you did it.” Coming forward, he took both her hands in his. “A pure heart and healing hands,” he murmured, leaning down to brush his lips gently over her fingers.

“I don’t see how I could have,” she objected. “I mean, I didn’t do anything on purpose…”

“Yes you did—you gave yourself to me. Don’t you see, sweetheart?” he asked. “You always had the power to mute my RTS, but just now when we were making love, when you opened yourself to me so completely…” He shook his head. “I don’t know how, but I felt something
shift
inside me. Somehow you healed me, Nina. Your love, your generosity and willingness to give yourself even when it hurt…you
healed
me.”

“And so then…that means…” She was almost afraid to say it, afraid to voice her hopes out loud.

“That means you’re mine, and I’m never letting you go.” Reddix pulled her close and enveloped her in a bear hug that nearly took her breath away.

Nina didn’t mind, she nuzzled close to him, pressing her face to his strong throat and breathing in the warm, spicy scent of his skin.

“Oh, Reddix,” she murmured, loving the feel of her bare breasts pressed to his broad chest. Though they had just finished making love, she felt her body reacting to his, making her want him all over again. Maybe the bonding fruit was still in her system. “I don’t know what to say,” she whispered breathlessly, rubbing herself against him like a cat.

“I do.” Pulling back a little, he took her mouth in a gentle but passionate kiss. “I love you, Nina of Earth. I think I loved you from the first minute I saw you in my dreams, but I didn’t want to admit it.” He shook his head. “I tried to think of you as just a means to an end, but I couldn’t…you’re more than that. You’re the female I’ve been waiting for even though I didn’t know I was waiting.”

“Oh, Reddix…” She snuggled closer to him, and he hugged her tight, crushing her to him, making her feel completely loved and secure at the same time. “I feel the same way,” she whispered at last, looking up at him. “Like we belong together.”

“Maybe because we do.” He ran his fingers over her bare shoulders and down her sides, ending by cupping her bottom in his big hands. “Mmm, I know we just finished but…”

“I’m ready for round two if you are,” Nina assured him breathlessly. “I think…think maybe there’s still some bonding fruit in my system.”

“It
does
take a long time to wear off, I think,” Reddix murmured with a smile. “But I have another reason to make love to you again, sweetheart.”

“Which is…?” Nina raised her eyebrows at him.

“To bond you to me.” Reddix kissed her again. “Now that my Touch Sense is fixed, I can give you the Deep Touch. And Goddess, you have no idea how much I want to do that.”

Nina’s breath caught in her throat. “The Deep Touch? So that means…we would be bonded together…forever?”

“Forever,” he assured her, a little grin playing around the corners of his sensual mouth.

“Then let’s go.” Nina grabbed his hand. “I love you, Reddix. I can’t wait to be yours forever.”

“I love you, too, sweetheart.” He pulled her against him for another hot kiss and then, swooping her up in his arms, he carried her into the bedroom.

Chapter Thirty-seven

“I’m so sorry—I really am.” Maggie looked so comically upset that Nina almost had to laugh.

“I told you—stop apologizing! If you hadn’t mixed up the signs for the cake layers, Reddix and I never would have gotten together.”

“She’s right you know, doll—they were tragically close to calling it quits for all time,” Kat murmured, smiling.

The friends were all meeting at Kat’s suite to give Maggie and Nina a going away party. Though the girls were going in different directions and saying goodbye their friends on the Mother Ship, both were excited to be leaving.

“I’m glad everything worked out for you and Reddix,” Maggie told Nina. “But I can’t help feeling like I caused a big problem for a lot of people—not just the two of you.”

“Oh please…” Olivia made a shooing gesture. “Baird loved helping me with my bonding fruit “problem.”

“And I got to keep little Daniel for the first time overnight.” Sophie stroked her baby nephew’s soft cheek, and he looked back at her with his strangely beautiful silver and gold ringed eyes. “Good practice for when my own two finally come.”

“I owe you one in the babysitting department,” Liv conceded, smiling at her twin. She looked at Maggie. “And I don’t think Lissa was too upset—was she?”

“Not from what I heard about how well the metal of the ship conducts their,
ah,
activities,” Kat said, smothering a smile.

Lissa blushed and smiled back. “Saber didn’t mind helping me out, and so far, our neighbors have no complaints.”

“Wait a minute—back up.” Nina held up a hand. “Are you saying that when you make love…”

“Everybody in the immediate area gets into a ‘loving’ mood.” Olivia nodded. “That’s right.”

“It seems to be how things work when a Touch Kindred and his bride make love on board ship,” Lissa said, her cheeks still pink.

“Oh my God.” Nina put a hand to her face. “Oh no! So
that’s
why all the people in the suites around mine have been staring and whispering at Reddix and me!”

“Probably so,” Kat remarked. “Though they should be thanking you. It’s not every day you get to experience actual bone fide sexual healing.”

“How
did
you heal him, anyway?” Sophia wanted to know. “Did the swamp witch Lissa told us about have anything to do with it?”

“I don’t think so.” Nina shook her head, frowning. “I don’t really think she had much interest in Reddix at all. She only wanted to heal him because she had this crazy idea that it would somehow free her son—who she seemed to think was Reddix’s half-brother.”

“His
what?”
Liv demanded. “You didn’t tell us all this.”

“It’s kind of complicated,” Nina said. “Honestly, I don’t know how much of what she told me and showed me was true. She showed Reddix a vision where I left him because he couldn’t bond me to him. Of course she neglected to mention that he
would
be able to bond us together after all.”

“Maybe she didn’t know,” Lissa said darkly. “Maybe she was just crazy. The rumors we always heard about her when I was growing up…” She shivered. “They don’t bear repeating.”

“She did show me some pretty wild things…a baby with red eyes…a man chained by a stream and covered in dust…” Nina shook her head, troubled. “It was so surreal…I don’t even know if it was magic or if I was just hallucinating from the fumes of the weird potion she was making.”

“And what does Reddix think about all this—the idea that he might have a half-brother somewhere?” Maggie wanted to know.

Nina shrugged. “To be honest, we haven’t talked about it all that much. I did get the impression he was going to confront his father about it, but that’s one family discussion I prefer to be left out of, thank you very much.”

“Well, it sounds to me like
you
healed him,” Sophia said decidedly. “The question is, did you do it on purpose?”

“No.” Nina shook her head. “And I have no idea how I did it. Mehoo-Jimmy—my adopted grandmother—thinks it has to do with the bear being my spirit animal.”

“Huh?” Kat frowned. “I don’t meant to sound dense, hon, but
what?”

Briefly Nina explained about how Reddix had always appeared as a bear—an animal with no words and a shadowed face—when she was dream sharing with him.

“I’ve had dreams about bears since I was a little girl,” she told Kat. “So Mehoo thinks I have a special connection with them—with Reddix. She feels like we were meant to find each other so I could heal him and we could make each other whole.”

“That’s so romantic.” Sophie smiled dreamily. “I like that idea. Out of the whole universe, you were the only one who could heal him.”

“Of course it could just be a matter of the right combination of chemistry between us or maybe being exposed to all those emotions on the planet of the Feeling People where we were marooned,” Nina went on. “But I’d like to think I had something to do with it. I wanted to heal him almost from the first moment I saw him—I can’t stand to see someone in pain, and Reddix was in agony when I first met him.”