I rested my
cheek against his chest. “I’m sorry. Jesus, what a nightmare, huh?”
“At least it’s over
, though,” he said into my hair. “And I didn’t lose you.”
“But I still lost Darcy,” I whispered
. “Scott was one thing…but Darcy, we were like sisters.”
“Hey,” he said, tilting my chin up towards his face. “
I bet your friend wouldn’t want you dwelling on her death. In fact, wherever she is, she’s probably satisfied that you took care of her killer personally.”
My lips trembled
. “Maybe, but it’s still hard to accept that she’s gone.”
“I know,” he said
. “But you don’t have to face her death alone. I won’t let you.”
I fell against him
and closed my eyes.
One Year L
ater
Lutsen
, Minnesota
“What do you think?”
I looked aroun
d the cozy cabin and smiled. “Jake, its perfect.”
His eyes sparkled
. “Wait until we go skiing. There’s nothing like the freedom of flying down the mountain on skis, especially after a fresh coating of snow.”
I laughed as I removed my jacket. “The only hill I’m flying down is the one with all the
children. I’ve only been skiing once and it was years ago.”
“Oh, you’ll graduate off that hill in no time
, and then I’ll take you down some of the tamer ones.”
“Look at you,” I said, moving towards him. “I haven’t seen you this excited…ever.”
He pulled me into his arms. “What’s not to be excited about? It’s our honeymoon and I have you alone for a full week, without kids or the station interrupting us. I’m ecstatic.”
Feeling his excitement pressed up
against my stomach I giggled. “Wow, I can tell.”
He released me and removed his jacket. “I think we should hit the slopes before it gets dark
and then I’m going to wine you, dine you, and then handcuff you to the bed for the rest of the night.”
My eyes narrowed. “I told you to leave those at home.”
He chuckled. “Still despise the cuffs, huh?”
“I just don’t like feeling powerless. I’d rather keep my hands free for other things.”
“On that note,” he said, slapping my butt, “I’m going to grab the rest of our suitcases so we can start skiing. The faster we get that over with, the faster you can show me what you can do with those hands.”
I
laughed. “I like that idea, Detective. Meanwhile, I’ll go get changed.”
An hour later, I stood on the B
unny Hill with three young children, re-learning how to snowplow while Jake went on to tackle the moguls. Fortunately, it didn’t take long to graduate to the “easy slopes”, and by the time we reunited an hour and a half later, I couldn’t wipe the smile from my face.
“
Having fun?” he asked, removing his goggles.
I nodded. “I forgot how fun skiing can be.”
“It’s a blast, isn’t it? So, how about a break? Care to join me for a hot drink in the chalet?”
“Sounds good.”
The chalet was busy but we lucked out and found an open table by the fireplace. Once seated, I stretched out my legs and let out a satisfied sigh. “This is wonderful, isn’t it?”
He grabbed my hand and squeezed it. “I couldn’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be
than alone with you. I’m a very happy man.”
I licked my lips. “Jake, there’s something I have to tell you.”
He straightened up. “This sounds serious.”
“It is.”
“Lay it on me.”
I smiled.
“I’m pregnant.”
Expecting him to be as excited as I was, I stared in surprise as his face fell.
“You’re what?” he asked.
I leaned forward. “Pregnant. I’m about six weeks. I know I should have told you
, but I didn’t want you to cancel the trip.”
He released my hand. “Are you supposed to be skiing when you’re pregnant?”
he asked tightly.
I tilted my head and studied him. He looked far from thrilled. “Well, I’ve been very careful and obviously, I’m not going down anything I can’t handle.”
He turned and stared at the fire without saying anything.
“What’s wrong?” I
asked. “I thought you’d be as happy as I am.”
He turned back tow
ards me, and for a minute, a spark of anger flashed through his eyes. “Sure, I’m happy,” he said.
I narrowed my eyes. “Well, you don’t look very happy.”
He scowled. “Would you prefer if I jumped up and down, shouting out to the world that my wife got herself pregnant without consulting me first?”
I stared at him in shock. “Excuse me?”
The couple at the next table glanced over at us and he shot them a threatening look. He then turned back to me. “I thought you were done having kids. You already have two,” he whispered, angrily.
My jaw dropped. “Jake? What’s gotten in to you?”
I’d never seen this side of him.
“You told me that you were on the pill.”
I nodded. “Yes, but there’s always a chance of getting pregnant, even on the pill.”
We stared at each other in silence for a few seconds and then he smiled. “Sorry. I just wasn’t prepared for that. Of course, I’m happy. It’s great news.”
The smile still hadn’t reached his eyes, which worried me.
“You’re sure?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Well, what’s done is done. There’s nothing we can do about it now.”
Wanting to throttle him,
I stood up. “This conversation is getting shittier by the minute. I’m going back to the cabin; I’m feeling nauseous all of a sudden.”
He pointed at my stomach. “See, another drawback of pregnancy.”
I glared at him. “No,
your
attitude is making me sick.”
“Lindsey…”
“Leave me alone, Jake,” I said, grabbing my jacket.
“You’re being silly.”
“Oh really? I just told you that you’re going to be a father, and from your reaction, it appears that you’d rather shoot yourself in the head. I guess I still don’t know what kind of a man you really are, Detective,” I spat.
He didn’t respond
, which made it even worse. Scowling, I turned and stormed out of the chalet, ignoring the curious stares of the people sitting near our table.
***
Back in the cabin, I took a hot shower and slipped on an oversized sweater and leggings. Still fuming about Jake’s reaction, I grabbed my Kindle and tried forgetting about it, but it wasn’t easy.
“Dammit,”
I muttered, slamming the thing against the cushion of the leather sofa.
I
still couldn’t believe Jake’s reaction. I’d expected the same kind of joy I’d felt when seeing the plus sign on the test strip. But his reaction appeared to be of disgust, which confused the hell out of me. He’d seemed so loving towards
my
kids that I’d only assumed he’d want one of his own.
Frustrated, I turned on the television and began flipping through the channels, waiting for Jake to return.
We definitely needed to talk about his attitude before our child was born. There was no way I’d raise a baby around someone who wasn’t interested in children. If that meant leaving him, well then, so be it.
Two hours later, after getting caught up in
an ‘Oprah’ marathon on cable, I fell into a troubled sleep.
Something was vibrating.
I opened my eyes and looked at the clock. It was almost midnight and Jake hadn’t yet made it back to the cabin.
Sighing,
I sat up and stretched my arms as one of Jake’s suitcases began vibrating. I unzipped it and found a cell phone inside of a brown leather jacket; a phone I didn’t recognize. It was an older flip phone, and when I opened it, I noticed there was a new picture-mail, sent by a number I did recognize.
Jake’s
.
Curious
as to why he’d be sending a photo to this particular phone, I opened up the message and stared at it in shock.
“What the hell?”
It was a photo of a naked woman, lying in the snow, her lifeless eyes staring past the camera, bruises around her throat.
I dropped the phone in horror and shuddered.
Obviously, someone in Lutsen had been killed and Jake was investigating the murder. Probably taking pictures as evidence.
But wasn’t he a Narcotics O
fficer?
I brushed it aside. I
t probably didn’t mean anything when you were one of the first detectives at a crime scene. Still, it seemed like quite a coincidence – that we were vacationing at the same time a woman was murdered, and that Jake was around to help. The real question was, why would he send a gruesome picture like that to this other phone he had?
I picked up
the phone once again, opened it back up, and went directly to the stored photos.
There were many
.
As I
began looking through the pictures, my blood ran cold. Most of them appeared to be of dead women. When I glanced at one in particular, I couldn’t breathe.
“Darcy?” I whispered in horror, staring
at her lifeless eyes under the bathwater. As I went back even further in the stored pictures, I noticed there was one taken of her sitting in the tub, very much alive, her face a mask of terror.
“No…” I moaned, dropping the phone.
Not Jake…please, God, don’t let it be so!
Sobbing, I rushed to put on my jacket and boots, needing to get out of the cabin before he returned. There was no way I wanted to confront him with this. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to understand the implication of those photos, especially the one
of Darcy right before her death.
I grabbed the truck keys
, my purse and threw open the front door.
“Whoa,” smiled Jake, standing on the other side. “I’m here. No need to send out the troops.”
I took a step backwards and stared at him in alarm.
He sighed. “I’m sorry. I know how worried you must have been. I went skiing and lost track of
the time.”
I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out.
“Excuse me, babe,” he said, brushing past me, carrying his skis.
“I was just going out,” I said
, hoarsely. “To get something to eat.”
He set his equipment down and began pulling off his boots. “
No need for that. There’s food in the fridge. I’ll make you something.”
“Um, that’s okay. I have a craving for some ice cream,” I said.
“We didn’t bring any.”
He walked over to me and put his h
ands on my shoulders. “We need to talk. Actually
, I
need to apologize. I was a total ass earlier. I know there isn’t an excuse but please, let me make it up to you.”
He stared at me with love in his eyes and my own filled up with bitter tears. How could someone so handsome and loving be so psychotic
? “It’s okay,” I squeaked. “Really.”
“
No, it’s not okay. I shouldn’t have said those things to you; they were horrible and totally unacceptable. I hope you’ll forgive me.”
“It’s fine.”
He sighed. “There’s something I have to tell you,” he said. “I know I should have told you before, but I didn’t want to scare you away.”
I looked past him at his other phone,
which was lying on the carpet. I knew I had to get the hell out of there before he noticed it. I forced a smile. “You know, it’s okay. Really, whatever it is.”
He shook his head. “No. It’s not okay. In fact,”
he said, removing his jacket. “It’s part of who I am and that’s why you should know.”
“I…”
He touched his stomach. “You know this scar on my abdomen?”
“Yes.”
“Well, it was given to me by my father.”
My eyes widened. “I thought you didn’t know your father.”
“Well, okay, my stepfather. He used to beat the shit out of me when I was a kid.”
“Oh.”
He nodded. “That’s why I’m terrified of having kids. I don’t know if I’d be any good at it and I don’t have a lot of patience as it is. I’d never forgive myself if I raised my hand or lost my temper.”
“
But if you realize its wrong, you don’t have to turn out like your parents.” I looked into his eyes. “And if you have certain urges, ones that aren’t normal, you should seek counseling, Jake.”
He smiled. “
I know. You’re right. That’s why I’m going to do everything it takes to be a damn good father. The truth is I’m excited about our baby, Lindsey. I was frightened at first, but now I can’t wait. I just really want you to know that.”