“You’re never going to get over him, are you?”
“Please.” Try though she might, Tessa couldn’t keep the sarcasm from her voice.
“You are never,
ever
going to be normal again.”
“Normal’s overrated.” She shoved the folders back into her desk and slammed the drawer.
One of Tiffany’s eyebrows lifted, her foot bouncing a saucy jig over her crossed legs. “It’s been three years. Just how long are you planning on letting this destructive behavior of yours continue?”
“I’m not going back out there, Tiffany. I told you. I simply refuse to put myself in that situation again.”
Tiffany’s blonde bob swayed when she shook her head, lips compressed in a firm hard line…but the dark-blue misery in her eyes told a different story.
And, unfortunately, those unspoken words were enough.
A string in Tessa’s heart softly snapped. Out of all the friends she and Michael had shared, out of the many acquaintances during their six years together, Tiffany was the one true friend who stood by her after he disappeared. For God’s sake, she’d hosted the bridal shower, attended every single fitting. The thought of causing a rift between them on top of the pain Michael had already inflicted… Tessa lowered her eyes and braced her forehead against her clasped hands. She didn’t want to hurt her best friend. Michael’s leave-taking had already caused enough heartache to last a lifetime.
“You think you know someone,” she said. “You think what you have with him is real and true, and then with nothing more than a wisp of breeze on your face, you’re proven wrong. It’s like everyone was in on some big secret and they forgot to include me.”
Tiffany tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, a troubled sigh slipping past her lips. “I just think you’re playing with fire, Tessa. I worry about the choices you make.”
She gritted her teeth, speaking past the stiffness in her jaw. “Yes, there’s a very good chance Michael royally screwed me up. And yes, it’s highly likely I may never recover. But the choices I make work for me. Don’t you see? I don’t have to worry about hurting anyone’s feelings. I don’t have to deal with any messy breakups, and I certainly don’t have to suffer that great worldwide fallacy called love.”
“It’s not a fallacy,” Tiffany whispered. “I’m in love.”
“I know.” Tessa reached her clasped hands across the desk in a show of support. “And I’m really happy for you. Really, I am. Maybe what I should say is love is a fallacy for me. There, does that make you happy?”
“No, that does not make me happy,” Tiffany snapped.
Tessa fell back in her chair. Love her business partner though she did, this reoccurring conversation would no doubt follow the same path as all those before—straight into an inescapable gridlock. “Can’t we please just drop it? I had a great time, he was really fantastic, I’m very happy with how everything turned out, and I’m home now and ready to get back to work, okay?”
She swung to her computer and filled her lungs, shaking her head as she exhaled.
“What category was he?”
Tessa snapped her chin over. “What?”
“What category?”
She frowned. “Why do you ask?”
“Because when you normally return from these rendezvous, or whatever the hell you want to call them, the very first thing you always tell me is their category.” Tiffany flicked her fingers in the air. “You dismiss them with a wave of your hand, grandly announcing what was wrong with them. You didn’t do that this time.”
Well, that didn’t sound right at all. “I do?”
“Yes, you do.”
“Huh.” She returned to her computer.
“Tessa.”
She refocused on Tiffany.
“What category?”
She dropped her gaze to her desk, pursed her lips.
Shit.
“I’m not sure.”
Tiffany sprang forward in her chair. “What do you mean ‘I’m not sure’?”
It was definitely strange. No matter how much she replayed their night together, Dibs just didn’t seem to fit any of the molds. “I thought about it on the plane, and I couldn’t figure it out.”
“You thought about it on the
plane
?” Blue eyes resembling dinner plates, Tiffany slowly edged back in the chair. She grinned.
Oh great. That was a sure sign of trouble ahead. “Get that goofy smile off your face.”
She nodded, pointing across the desk. “Not to mention the internet search.”
Gah! Talk about a stupid mistake. Now this would never end! Tessa dropped her forehead into her palm. “Can you
please
leave me alone so I can get back to work?”
“I’m just saying, it normally takes you maybe three seconds to figure out what category a guy is in, but this guy—no category.” Tapping out a beat on the arms of the chair, Tiffany glanced casually around the office.
“That’s so not true.” Tessa crossed her arms.
“What’s Kevin?” Tiffany pinned her with a calculated stare.
Her boyfriend of two years?
Pffft.
Easy. “He’s a two.”
“And Mr. Sandburg?”
Wealthy business owner. Another easy call. “A four.”
Tiffany arched a challenging brow. “And the UPS delivery guy?”
“A one, struggling inside a two,” Tessa said, aggravation knotting the muscles in her shoulders. “Is there a point to this exercise?”
“Yes, there’s a point!” Tiffany tossed her hands in the air. “This is the first guy in over three years you haven’t been able to fit into one of your stupid little categories!”
Tessa raked a hand through her hair. “It doesn’t matter. I’m still not interested.”
Closing her eyes, Tiffany muttered incoherently.
Why, oh why, did the woman refuse to see reason? “I’m
happy
with the way things are right now, Tiff. I don’t
want
anything to change. My life is wonderfully mess free and it suits me perfectly.”
“Oh, okay.” She rolled her eyes, pushed up from the chair and headed for the doorway. “By the way—” She stopped in the threshold and aimed a sharp finger at the folder on Tessa’s desk. “Your Mister No-Category man is worth over four hundred million.”
Tessa’s jaw dropped.
“Oh, and Tess?” She peeked around the wall. “Make sure you give my name to your pharmacist.”
Tessa squinted in annoyance as her friend smirked and disappeared.
A few hours later and a glance at her desk clock, and Tessa lifted brows in surprise. How in the world did it get to be eight o’clock? She stretched her arms over her head before covering an expansive yawn and shutting down her computer.
As she bent to retrieve her bags from the floor, a waft of Dibs’s cologne bathed her senses. His face flashed in her mind. She grabbed the edge of her desk, a blast of heat suffusing her cheeks as the kiss they had shared in the elevator became spotlighted center stage. The urgency of his lips, the deep moan of arousal from his chest, the passion darkening his eyes…She blinked, pressed a trembling hand to her forehead, and left the office for home.
The moment she entered her condo, relief flooded in. Her spine collided with the door as dropped her bags at her feet. At last she was home, the one place she didn’t have to put up a pretense with anyone. No smiling when she wanted to cry, no pretending to like someone when on the inside she could barely stand to be near them.
She tossed her keys onto the antique bureau, pausing a moment to enjoy the spectacular nighttime view of Lake Michigan through the eastern wall-to-wall windows of her condo. Inside the kitchen, she brewed some tea, and then sipped the cup down the hallway, past her office and a small half bath. She toed off her heels in the bedroom and continued into the master bath, lowered to the edge of the tub, and drew a hot bath. When she stood to remove her clothes, she caught her reflection in the vanity mirror.
The time had come.
Never had she imagined her life this way, roaming the empty halls of her heart. She and Michael had made plans, talked of a home and children. Three, he had said, two boys and a girl. Only so he could use up the best parts of her and then deny she ever existed. He promised to love her forever, damn it. Her life wasn’t supposed to be this way.
A small tear escaped and trickled down her cheek. She briskly wiped it away, turning her back on the image in the glass. What a fool she’d been, believing in something best left to fairy tales and romance novels. Love was a lie, spoon-fed to little girls. Happily ever after didn’t exist. Not in her world. Not anymore.
She eased into the bathtub and closed her eyes, her fingertips trailing over her shoulder. Dibs had touched that same spot. Standing before her in the hotel room, he’d whispered she was beautiful, made her feel special, but in truth, there was no such thing as special.
A dark stain crept across the canvas of her imagination, blotting out the image. She dipped a washcloth into the steaming water and placed it over the shallows of her eyes. A heavy pressure gathered in her chest. But she was home, no one could see. When bloated tears escaped, she let them come. Maybe just this once they would help. She would finally be able to reconcile her anger and fear of abandonment against the safety of being alone.
****
A flash of white snagged her attention and Tessa swiveled away from the RSVP list for the Sandburg wedding. Tiffany’s face remained hidden behind the huge bouquet of Asiatic lilies until she set the vase on Tessa’s desk.
“You got flowers,” she said dryly.
“I see that. They’re very beautiful.”
“Yes, they are.” She crossed her arms.
“Who are they from?” Tessa rotated back to her computer and pulled up the invitations list.
“I don’t know.”
She laughed. “I know you read the card. Who are they from?”
“I didn’t say I didn’t read the card.” Tiffany plucked a white envelope from the bouquet and tossed it onto the desk. “I merely said I didn’t know who they were from.”
Tessa frowned and tugged out the handwritten message. It read
Rex, Sorry I overslept.
Panic jolted her heart into overdrive like she’d just avoided a head-on collision. She reread the message and stood on a set of unstable legs. “Uh oh…”
“Who’s Rex?” Tiffany asked.
“Evidently, that would be me.” Cupping her forehead in her palm, Tessa leaned away from her desk to scan the large crystal vase. This could not be happening. Why? Why in the world would he send flowers?
“How come ‘uh oh’?”
“He found me.”
Tiffany’s eyebrows shot up. “The whack job?”
Tessa plopped into her chair, eyes darting around the office, as if the mahogany paneling would magically display the answers. What in world could the man be
thinking
? He’d been granted a clean get-away. Why purposely reinitiate contact? It just didn’t make any sense.
A wicked grin curved her friend’s lips. “Good.”
“Ah, not good, you mean.”
“No, I meant good. I couldn’t be happier that he found you. In fact, I’m sort of thrilled.” She sighed.
Tessa dropped her hand to her blotter. “Stop being such a snot.”
“It’s about time you paid for the consequences of your actions. I can’t wait to see how this all plays out.” A graceful pirouette on her toe, and Tiffany nearly waltzed out of the office.
Tessa huffed, picked up the vase and carried it into the small reception area. She didn’t want them in her office. The reminder was too distressing.
She chewed the inside of her cheek, centering the vase on the glass end table next to the couch. At least he hadn’t called. An involuntary shiver wrenched her shoulders when she imagined the discomfort
that
conversation would’ve caused. Perhaps he was just being polite? Yeah, that seemed like Dibs. First and foremost, he was a gentleman. He might totally send flowers as a thank you. And what a lovely thought…as long as his attentions ended there. She shook her head and returned to her desk.
A morning of client phone calls later, Tessa suggested meeting in Tiffany’s office for lunch and to go over the notes from her trip. Halfway down the list, she was interrupted by the ringing telephone.
Tiffany plucked the receiver from the base. “TNT Entertainment.”
Tessa tore off a huge bite of her sandwich.
“May I ask who’s calling?” She locked onto Tessa. “Just a moment.” She jabbed the hold button and balanced the receiver against her chest. “It’s him.”
The food in Tessa’s mouth assumed the flavor and consistency of damp cardboard. No. No way. She tried swallowing, but the sticky wad refused to budge. So now what? Maybe if she refused his call, he’d get the hint. Dibs was no dummy. And that seemed like a reasonable enough plan. “I’m not here.”
A full five seconds passed, Tiffany glaring across the desk. “Chicken.” She punched the hold button. “I’m sorry, she isn’t in right now. May I take a message?” She paused, jotting a number on a sticky note. “Okay, I’ll let her know…yep, sure thing.” She dropped the receiver onto the cradle and ripped the sticky note from the pad. “You’re supposed to call him.”
Yeah, right. Like that was gonna happen. Tessa balled up the paper and tossed it into the wastebasket. “Okay, let’s talk about the mother-in-law/weirdo-estranged-brother scenario.” She lifted her planner from the chair beside hers. “I’m worried—”
“That was one.”
One what? Strike? She dropped her shoulders. “Very funny.”
“I’m not kidding.”
“Be as serious as you want, it won’t change a thing. Now, about the mother-in-law and the brother...”
Exactly one hour later, the front doorbell rang. Tessa left her computer for reception, shifting her focus between the delivery man and two dozen pink tulips beautifully arranged in an iridescent vase. She fisted a hand on her hip. “You have
got
to be kidding.”
Tiffany appeared from behind as Tessa snatched the card from the bouquet. It read
I’ll buy you a steak
and showed a phone number. “I think I’m in trouble.”