Shifting Gears (17 page)

“Never mind. From the way you're blushing, I have a feeling I don't want to know.”

Annabelle grinned. “Welcome back. Did you guys have a nice long weekend?”

After this past weekend's race, Kerri and Ranger had gone from Dover over to Harrisburg to visit his mom and dad, taking an extra day for the visit. They'd flown in last night, and Annabelle hadn't had a chance to catch up with Kerri since she'd won the race at Dover.

Kerri nodded. “It was great. Except for the part where I never want to hear the word ‘wedding' again.”

“Are they still pressuring you to have a big event?” Annabelle had talked a little to Kerri last week about her engagement and had secretly thought that, despite Kerri's resistance to her mother's and her in-laws' preference for a large wedding, the sheer number of people that Kerri and Ranger would have to invite from the racing world would mean a huge party, no matter what.

“Yeah, but I don't mind that so much anymore. I mean, it's going to be big whether I like it or not.”

So she'd realized. Good. “So what's the problem?”

Kerri leaned against the side of Lee's truck chassis, which they'd put up on a hydraulic lift to make some other adjustments before it went out on the road for his race that coming Friday. “It's funny, but I actually like the idea of a beautiful ceremony and a long white dress, flowers, cake … the whole thing. I
like
it. But it's taken me a long time to be able to even admit that, because I've spent so many years building up this image of myself as a tough tomboy type that it's hard to wrap my head around the fact that I can be feminine, too.”

She grinned. “Although Ranger has been doing a good job of teaching me that part, as well.”

Annabelle laughed, but she was also feeling a bit unsteady. Though Kerri had been talking about herself, Annabelle could see similarities in her own life. She'd insisted last night to Grady that she wasn't very strong, but maybe that was more out of habit than it was true.

Maybe she could afford to stay with him for more than just one night. Maybe she didn't need to push quite so hard to find a place on her own just to prove her independence.

“What about you, did you have a big wedding?” Kerri asked.

Annabelle shook her head. “It was tiny. If I ever had the chance to do it again, I'd throw the biggest party that North Carolina has ever seen. Even if my as-yet-unknown future husband didn't want a big wedding. I'd do it for me.”

Kerri looked at her for a bit, until Annabelle started to feel a little uncomfortable. Was she thinking about Annabelle and Grady? Everyone knew by now that they were involved.

But then Kerri changed the subject, a bit abruptly, but Annabelle was too relieved to really notice. They talked for a while longer about the past weekend's race and Kerri finally headed off to go talk to Bit. As she walked away, she winked at Annabelle and said, “I'm glad you're a part of our family. And you're one hell of a crew chief.”

It nearly made Annabelle start crying again.

Do not cry.

She wasn't going to be that weak. But Kerri's words meant so much, especially on top of Grady's reassurances and support yesterday.

If there was ever a family she would want to be a part of, it would be the Harts. But she wasn't ready for something like that. Not yet. Not until she stood on her own first.

Otherwise, what would she really have to offer a family like that?

Annabelle worked for a few more hours, helping Bit and the crew to get Lee's truck up to speed. It was going out tomorrow with the transport driver to the next race in Florida, and Annabelle wanted to be sure she was on top of this one. Grady would be acting as crew chief again, with Annabelle assisting, but there was still no room for her to slack off. The sooner she took the lead in this area, the better for everyone.

In the meantime, though, she kept thinking about staying with Grady, and how maybe it wasn't such a big deal to sleep at his place.

Just for one more night.

The thought made her smile.

Around five thirty, she headed upstairs to wash up and change out of her coveralls, then stopped by Grady's office on her way out. She poked her head in the open doorway to find him focused on his laptop, brow furrowed in concentration.

“Hey,” she said softly, and he looked up, a smile breaking across his handsome face.

Yum.

“I, um, I think I'm going to take off for the day. Lee's truck is all set. Do you want me to brief you on it now or just before the race or—”

“Why don't we go over it a little later tonight?” He shrugged. “That is, if you don't mind staying over again.”

No. She didn't mind at all. And she was relieved that he was the one who'd brought it up. She nodded. “That would be really nice. And thank you, Grady.”

He shook his head. “No need to thank me. It's my pleasure.”

She decided not to argue with that. They couldn't have sex in his office again right this minute, after all.

“Do you remember the code to get in?”

She started whistling the tune to “Happy Birthday,” and he grinned.

“Sounds good, then. I'll see you in a bit.”

It was so easy, and yet it felt like a big step. Another night at Grady's house. It was such a relief to have somewhere to go, and they fit together so perfectly …

She had to stay on her guard, though. If she got too complacent, what would that mean for her dreams? She wanted to be able to live on her own at least once in her life.

Well. No use thinking about that now. They weren't even officially dating, as far as she knew. Right now, they were taking this one night at a time, and those nights were definitely the best she'd ever had. She was sleeping with a man she wanted, who wanted her back. That was pretty damned independent already … right?

Right.

Annabelle blew Grady a kiss and walked out, smiling to herself.

Chapter 15

He really liked seeing her things in his house.

After the first night that Annabelle had spent in his house and in his bed, he'd already wanted her to never leave. He'd tried to hold back his excitement, though, because it was still so early in their relationship, and he was still getting to know her.

But even despite the new-relationship factor, it had been fucking amazing.

The morning after, he'd tried to be as casual about it as he could. She was spooked about getting too involved with him, though he wasn't sure why, and he wasn't about to frighten her off.

So instead, he'd completely avoided the topic. They'd woken up, showered together, had breakfast and talked about the day ahead, then gone to work in their separate cars. He hadn't once mentioned how much he liked sleeping next to her in his own bed, or how it made him happy to see her toothbrush next to his. Not just because it would be a little creepy, either. He knew he could get too intense about things like that, but mostly he was trying to keep her comfortable.

She'd been through enough.

And that evening, when she'd stopped by his office to let him know she was leaving, he'd simply acted like it was no big deal when he asked her if she was staying over again.

Even though, inside, he was biting his nails.

He hadn't said, “home” or “my house” or anything that felt too domestic, either. It seemed to have worked, because she hadn't argued. When he'd gotten home about half an hour after her, she was in the middle of making dinner, and it was so goddamned
perfect
that he'd had to shut himself in his room for a few minutes, pretending he was just changing, to get ahold of himself.

Telling her he could see them like this forever was not going to help his case.

That second night had been just as good as the first, and that had turned into a third, and a fourth … and then they'd flown out together to Lee's race in Michigan. But she'd left a load of her clothes in his dryer and her shampoo in his shower, so he counted the time they were away from his house, too.

Which meant she'd already been staying with him for almost a whole week by the time they flew back in to Charlotte, amped up from another great finish—Lee had come in third this time—and she already felt like an integral part of his life.

He knew how she liked her coffee and which side of the bed she preferred to sleep on. He knew what she thought about politics and babies, that she'd had an emergency root canal right before she got married that left her mouth numb in the few photos that had been taken of that day, and that despite all the trials of her life these past few years, things in Texas had been okay.

She'd told him that there had been terrible moments that she didn't want to talk about, but there had also been wonderful things that she'd shared with him. And then she'd said that, if life was an average, then those seven years had been
okay,
and she was trying to find some measure of peace with that.

He'd found something with her that was better than peace.

It was fulfillment. It was feeling like he mattered to someone, that he was a success at just being
himself.
She'd become someone he looked forward to waking up to and couldn't fall asleep without. But after a couple more races, Annabelle would be ready to do it all on her own.

And then what would happen?

Would she still get her own place? She really seemed to want that. Would she leave him completely? He didn't like that idea at all, but he was reluctant to broach the topic with her just yet.

Sometimes, he wished he knew the future.

But then, what if it didn't include Annabelle?

And in that case … well, he rather not know a thing like that.

*   *   *

It had been nearly three weeks since her mother had kicked her out, and Annabelle had never been happier.

This
was what she'd been born to do.

She stood on top of the pit box, surveying the track. This was her first race as the lone crew chief on the pit box, and even though she was scared as all hell, she was finally okay with the fear. Because she couldn't stop the simultaneous feeling of pride that was threatening to well up and out of her. She knew a lot of the folks around here now. She had friends—or at least, friendly acquaintances. She had a team and a purpose, and she had Grady.

Somehow, that one night had become three weeks, and between spending every night together and seeing each other every day at work, Annabelle had come to know Grady better than she'd ever known her ex-husband, even.

Life was as good as it could get … for now.

Though she hoped it would be even better soon. Her attorney had called the other day and told her they'd set a court date for a hearing about the forged signatures, and that there was a strong chance she'd win the case. It would still take time for her credit to improve, but at least she'd no longer be on the hook to pay off all that money.

She'd already paid Momma. Dropped a big part of her first paycheck in the mailbox and driven away, feeling free instead of sad.

She didn't think she could have felt that way if it hadn't been for the way Grady had taken her in and given her a place to catch her breath while she figured out where to go next.

Staying with him was wonderful. If felt good. It felt right and it made her so happy … but she was growing too complacent. It was too easy, almost. Like it felt wrong that she wasn't struggling and suffering for the first time in years.

She was happy, and it felt wrong.

God, that was messed up.
She
was so messed up. Even if she did care so much for Grady, he didn't deserve to be saddled with a girl like her.

Yeah, but he actually seems to like you.

True …

No. No. She couldn't be thinking these kinds of things. Even if she didn't have to pay off the debt, she still wasn't in a solid position financially yet. She wanted to own her own home and have savings socked away before she thought about marrying again. And if that happened, then she'd insist on a prenup.

Of course, by the time she did all that, she'd probably be too old to think about getting married, anyway.

Kerri's voice came on through the headphones Annabelle was wearing. “Whaddaya say, chief? Are you ready to do this?”

Annabelle checked the clock. The drivers were lining up behind the pole, getting ready for the race to start in … four minutes. From here, she could see Kerri's number thirteen car, the blue one with sponsor logos plastered all over it.

She grinned. “Ready as I'll ever be. What about you? Feel like winning a race today?”

Kerri's snort was audible even through the headset. “We're the only women in this game, chief. Of course we're going to win.”

Annabelle laughed. “And maybe we can plan your wedding while you're putting in four hundred laps.”

Kerri groaned. “Don't get me started on wedding planning.”

She'd been complaining about it for the month that Annabelle had been working at Hart Racing, but at least she and Ranger had set a date, and despite the grumbling, Kerri actually had some very specific ideas about how she wanted the big day to go.

The line crackled. “Are you actually gonna wear a
dress
on your wedding day, Hart? I'd give up a win just to see that.”

Annabelle's eyes went wide. Who was on their channel?

“You don't have any wins to give up, Simms,” came Kerri's retort.

Someone else laughed. “Nice one, Kerri.”

That was something Annabelle was still getting used to. The drivers loved to rag on one another during downtime in a race, and she was still learning which voices belonged to whom.

“Shut up, Ty.” That was Simms. “You better—”

“Drivers! Start! Your! Engines!”

The line went very suddenly silent as the cars on the track all turned over at once, the screech of metal scraping metal and fuel combusting joining the roar of the crowd to create the most wonderful, welcome, deafening sound of all.