SHOOT: A Novel (14 page)

We left the
ladies’ room to find Brad waiting for us. The look in his eyes made it clear he
knew what was going on in there and he wasted no time walking over to stand
beside me, nudging my arm with his elbow. He leaned forward and looked at the
other three to brazenly wink at them.

They all giggled
before walking up to the bar, ordering a round of champagne in celebration.

Just as they were
holding their glasses up, Brad leaned in to me with a smirk, “Fashion Week has
inspired a new idea.”
 

The following
evening, I arrived at Amorous Productions for the newly inspired photo shoot
Brad mentioned at the after-party. Despite my questioning, he managed to remain
awfully mysterious about the nature of it. I closed and locked the front door
behind me before standing in the lobby feeling slightly nervous instead of
making my way back to the studio like I usually did. The mystery had been
nothing but compelling at first, but after Brad had told me in bed that morning
to “be open” to the shoot. My nerves had already buzzing throughout my body. He
was always finding new and provocative ways to push my buttons. Now I could
only imagine what was planned for me next.

I thought I had
been quite open in our past shoots already so I wondered what exactly he had in
mind if he was being so secretive and telling me to keep an open mind. It had
to be something extreme, I reasoned, and it made my head spin to think of what
could be more extreme than our BDSM photo shoot.
 

About a minute
later, Brad appeared to greet me in the lobby with a warm kiss. He hugged me
tight and gave me a soft peck at the corner of my mouth.

“Are you ready?”

I looked into his
eyes, pressing my lips together in a thin line. I inhaled deeply and nodded. Taking
my hand, Brad led me into the photography studio. As soon as I walked in I saw a
pile of props in the corner, but I wasn’t able to make out what they were. I
was too distracted by two other models standing nearby, both of whom were
wearing robes. Immediately I turned to look at Brad, question marks in my eyes.

“This is Penny and
David,” Brad introduced me. “This is Chloe; the gorgeous woman I mentioned
before.”

The two of them
stepped forward to greet me—with a kiss on the mouth.

 
I was stunned. I stood stock still, not
knowing how to react. Brad slid in front of me and placed his hands on my
shoulders, “Try to relax and be open to this. It will be a bit…
different
than the past shoots we’ve
done.”
 

“I need to talk to
you,” I told him. “Alone.” Brad nodded and led me to through the back room and
into another photo studio, which I had seen but not used.

 
“I never signed up for this,” I told him point
blank. Brad said nothing, making it clear he was there to listen to everything
and anything I had to say to him.

“I…” I paused,
hesitating for just a brief second, “I don’t think I want to do this.”
 

“What’s wrong?” He
asked, tone gentle and caring.

That was all it
took for everything to come crashing down over me in the span of a second,
sending me to have a near breakdown. I had to get everything off my chest. I
wanted to tell him everything that had been on my mind lately, including the
guilt and confusion. It was no longer just about this shoot he had set up; it
was about everything we had been doing together. It was about everything
I
had been doing since moving to New
York City.

“I’m just not sure
if this is me,” I told him truthfully. There was no better way to put it, at
least not any way I could think of. “Look, I’ve always loved the photo shoots
we’ve done. I was uncomfortable and shy at first, but you really helped break
me out of that shell and I’ve truly loved every shoot. Every one of them has always
made me feel sexy, confident, and empowered.”

“What bothers you
the most about it?” he asked me, trying to understand what was running through my
mind. I could see it in his eyes clear as day—he truly cared about me.

“I wouldn’t say
there’s a problem, I’m just not sure if it’s
right
.” There was a long pause where I looked everywhere except at
his eyes. When I finally met his gaze, I could tell he was trying to make sense
of everything while still being sensitive to me. He always tried to be so
understanding, but not coming from a small town in the Midwest made it
impossible for him to grasp some things.

“My mom once told
me there was nothin’ good being in the city. I’m starting to wonder if she
meant stuff like this. I’ve been wondering if I’m doing something wrong. I like
it all, a lot, but I don’t know if it’s right.”

Brad took a moment
to process everything I had said before moving forward in an attempt to comfort
me. He placed his hand gently on my forearm and looked deep into my eyes. His
beautiful, blue eyes were more full of kindness than ever.

“I can’t help but
ask, how can what you’ve been doing be ‘wrong’ if you’ve enjoyed it and nobody
is getting hurt?” I cast my gaze down and shrugged. I didn’t know how to answer
that question because it was one of the things I had been asking myself, just
not in those words.

“I think,” he went
on, “Sometimes it feels like something is ‘wrong’ because people like to impose
their judgments on others and we end up taking it to heart.”

I sighed and
leaned forward to rest my head on his chest. It relaxed me. There was something
to be said about his words. My mother was always strict and she raised me with
a very specific, stringent set of values and now that I was straying, I
couldn’t help but question everything.

“Honestly, I went
through that period in my life as well,” Brad admitted. “But eventually I grew
into a different person. I grew into the person I always wanted to be and I came
to terms with it being a great thing for me.” He ran his hand over my hair
softly a few times, “These shoots aren’t supposed to make you feel
uncomfortable in any way, ever. They are supposed to make you feel empowered
and sexy, just like you said they did.” He took a brief pause to pull me in
closer and allow me time to fully take in his words. “Even though your family
has a business and your mom doesn’t approve of you leaving, it comes down to
you
needing to live
your
own life. I do think you’re doing the right thing by sending
them money to help them out. Eventually your mother will come around, accepting
your new life once she realizes how happy you truly are.”

I sighed against
his chest, “I love how understanding you are. I just…I don’t want to talk about
it now.” The whole situation made it feel like there was a two-ton weight on my
chest.

“Do you want a
drink?” Brad asked, caressing each of my shoulders in his hands.

“God yes.” I gave
a little laugh.

Brad fixed me a
quick drink and told me to relax. “Don’t even think about the photo shoot. We
don’t have to do it. I’ll never push you beyond your limits, I only wanted to
encourage you to explore anything and everything.”

I took a small sip
of the strong liquor and leaned my head against his arm, reflecting on
everything he had just told me. The more I thought about it, the more I started
to agree with him. How could I be doing something ‘wrong’ if
I
enjoyed it? Was my mother really the
judge and jury to
my
actions?
 

“Is it alright if
I call them over here?” Brad asked a few minutes later after I had time to
think and calm down. I nodded.

I was done talking
about everything I’d been internalizing so far and needed to clear my mind. He
wrapped his arm around my shoulder and called out, “Penny! David! Come meet us
back here!” Then he turned me to the right and pointed at a couch behind a
coffee table. There was a plate of cheese and crackers that sat next to a
bottle of whiskey and three glasses. “How about we just hang out?”

I took another sip
of my drink and nodded. “Sounds good,” I told him with a smile.

 
It wasn’t until Penny and David walked in that
I actually noticed how attractive they were. I had been blindsided by their
presence, though not as much as their kisses, so I didn’t stop to look at them
earlier. David was a bit taller than me, though shorter than Brad, and sported
a full head of light brown hair. His eyes were so dark they looked black and
his lips were red almost to the point that it looked like he was wearing some
sort of lightly tinted lip balm. He had golden tanned skin that looked smooth to
the touch. I could tell, even through the robe, he was in great shape.

Penny’s skin was
fair and she had lovely caramel brown hair. It was full and flowed up to her
shoulders in volumes of natural waves, framing her beautiful face and hazel
eyes perfectly. Her breasts weren’t incredibly large, but they were perky and
round, definitely attractive, and they fit nicely on her slender body frame. There
was no denying they were both model material.

“Let’s have a drink
and enjoy?” Brad proposed.

I nodded after
giving him a quick peck on the cheek. I pulled off my spring yellow cardigan to
reveal a loose fitting, sheer white sleeveless blouse with a red bralette
underneath. I had paired that with simple but tight black skinny jeans and
black pumps to look casual, but still effortlessly sexy. Brad placed his hand
on my lower back under my shirt, thumbing the waistband of my jeans.

“You look good,”
he whispered against my ear. I suppressed a satisfied smile, taking my seat on
the edge of the couch. Brad sat on the armchair next to me and placed his hand
on my knee, watching as Penny and David sat on the couch as well.

Without wasting
time, Brad served us drinks. He told me all about how he’d met Penny and David,
including the tale of how he’d mustered up the courage to recruit them to
Amorous Productions. Penny had come along first; back when Brad was even more
secretive about his side project than he was now.

“I met David when
we did an off-Broadway show,” Penny recounted, the two of them chuckling. “I
told him he had model looks and he thought I was joking. Then I brought him to
my agency so he could see I wasn’t.”

“Penny was easily
the prettiest woman on the roster back then,” Brad commented. He turned to look
at me and gave me a kiss. Then he whispered in my ear, “But she pales next to
you.” He teasingly nibbled at my ear and I squirmed in her seat. “She really
helped me get Amorous Productions going, you know.”

“Brad likes to say
that, but the truth is he’s the one who really helped me out. He recruited me
and with the money I made I was able to get my family off the farm. In fact, I
even just bought an apartment for them in Chicago!”

“You got them off
the farm?” I asked, leaning forward. Out of everything that had been said that
night, it was what had caught my interest the most.

Brad leaned back
and watched us. “Yes,” Penny responded, “We had a family farm. I come from the
Midwest, didn’t you know? Brad mentioned you did too.”

I was floored. I
had never expected this gorgeous woman, who Brad brought in tonight for
who-knows-what, to be from the Midwest as well. I finally had in front of me
someone I never thought I would find– a woman who could understand on a
personal level the sorts of internal struggles I was facing.

“And you left to
be a model?”

“Not exactly, I’m
an aspiring actress just like David’s an aspiring actor. Modeling came to me
and I liked it, especially once Brad took me under his wing. I’m so grateful
for him discovering me and always pushing me just the right amount.”

“Do you ever miss
home?” I asked, wanting to pick her brain.

“Sometimes. But I
would never go back, I love it here in New York. You can be exactly who you
want to be without judgment. It’s so…freeing.” Her face lit up in the biggest,
most genuine smile I had ever seen.

I was touched by
Penny’s story, not to mention she was a beautiful and attractive woman. Her
story paralleled my own and I could have never put it better. New York was
judgment free. New York was the place you could go to be who you wanted to be.
It was the place where I could surround myself with likeminded people and not
follow a set of strict standards like my mother always wanted for me.