Sia (14 page)

“
Give us a little time, Dad?” I whisper into his ear. “Maybe I can reach her.”

He leans back and looks at his wife, eyes filled with pain. “I’d appreciate anything you can do. I’ll be in my office.” With that, he kisses my forehead and leaves.

I watch him go, and I nod at Beatriz when she lifts her brow in question. Then it’s just me and Mom, alone.

She slouches in the armchair with one elbow braced on the arm, her cheek resting on one fist. She looks dangerously close to falling asleep.

I pull another chair closer and lean forward. “Mom? You okay?”

She gives me a vague smile. “Mm-hmm.”

“
Can we talk about what’s going on?”

She wrinkles her nose, and her eyes twinkle. “Silly girl! There’s nothing going on. I just had a couple of drinks to relax. Your father always makes such a big deal about it. Can’t a person relax once in a while?”

“
Of course, Mom. But I think we all know that you’re having more than a couple of drinks a day.”

She rolls her eyes to the side to escape the accusation.

I suck in a breath. “And Mom, I want you to know that it really matters to me that you’re drinking so much. I’m worried about you.”

“
Don’t let it bother you, baby. I’m fine.”

I grab her hand and press it against my cheek. “I love you, Mom. But . . . I can’t live with you if this is how it’s going to be.”

“
So you’d leave me as well?”

“
If that’ll make you see how serious your condition is, yes.”

For some reason, those words strike a nerve. Her lips pull tight. “You sound like your judgemental father.”

“
Dad loves you, too. Really, Mom. We just want you to get better.”

She turns away. I’m losing her. “One week,” I suddenly say, grasping at straws. “That’s all I ask. Visit a rehab center for one week. If you think it’s useless after that time, we’ll come get you and figure something else out. Please?”

She scoffs. “One week, huh?”

“
Yes. That’s how long I was homeless.”

Now she faces me, speaking with remorse. “I should have protected you. My poor baby.”

“
Mom, you can’t prevent what you can’t predict. But you can do this for me. Please . . . it’s the only thing I want—for you to get better.”

She mulls it over before she sighs, rubbing her reddened eyes. “Fine. One week. That’s it. If that is what it takes for you to stay and see that I am okay, then fine.”

Hope roars into my heart. “That’s good, Mom! That’s
really
good. It won’t be easy, but I promise that Dad and I will be with you every step of the way.” I want to punch the air with excitement, but I have to stay calm. I don’t want to frighten her. I can see she’s really fragile. “You don’t know how proud I am of you for this. Dad and I can take you to a center tomorrow if you want,” I try, suddenly optimistic.

My mother turns her hand so it cups my cheek. Her beautiful eyes, rimmed with red from the booze, are drowning in sadness and regret. Finally, she nods and gives a little sniff. “Yes. Tomorrow.” She drops her hand. “You can tell your father, honey.”

Dad is down the hall in his large home office. When I arrive, he’s behind his mahogany desk. He has turned his chair so he’s looking out the window and into the Los Angeles night.

“
Dad?”

He spins to face me. I’m startled to see he’s been crying. He tries to hide the fact, but I see the evidence in his puffy eyes.

“
She says yes,” I tell him. I smile when his shoulders drop an inch, as if some heavy burden has been lifted off him. “I told her we’ll take her tomorrow. And she said she agreed.”

Smiling, he shakes his head. “You’re a wonder, Sia. Thank you.”

“
Let's just hope she doesn't change her mind.” I hesitate before continuing. “Dad, there’s something else I want to talk about. I know you’re having trouble with the business. I want to help. But I need to understand what’s going on.”

He sits a little taller and smiles dismissively. “Don’t you worry about that, honey. That’s just boring business stuff.”

“
Please, Dad. I told you: I can handle it. Who knows? Maybe I can find a way to help.”

He sounds hopeless. “I don’t think anyone can help us now, but if you insist. Business is bad, sweetheart. That’s the plain truth. We’re in way over our heads, and we can’t seem to catch a break.” He hesitates.

“
Go on, Dad,” I say.

“
We’re almost bankrupt,” he says quietly. “If we don’t find a way to turn things around, we’re going to lose our home and cars in two months. We’ll have to move outside of Beverly Hills, where the homes are cheaper. And we’ll get a much smaller house. I almost told Beatriz and John today, to give them notice that they’ll have to find other employment, but I just couldn’t. They’re like part of the family now. I . . . ” He drops his forehead into one hand. “It’s just so humiliating.” His eyes are glued to his desk. “I don’t know what we’re going to do,” he says softly. “How are we going to face our friends? No one will want to associate with us now. The Holloway name will be a joke.”

“
Dad, none of that matters.”

He makes a choked sound. “Sure it does.”

“
No, it doesn’t. It doesn’t matter what people say. And if your friends aren’t understanding when you’re going through hard times, then they weren’t real friends to begin with. So don’t be embarrassed. You’ve done everything you can.”

He leans back and raises his hands. “But the house. We could lose everything.”

“
Not everything. We’d still have each other. If we have to downsize to a smaller house—or even an apartment—it’ll be fine. We can even take the bus, like normal people have to all the time.”

He grins wryly. “Sia Holloway on public transit? My, my, what will Amber and your other friends say?”

“
I don’t care. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about my life these days . . . and I’m not even sure she’s a part of it anymore.”

That’s a sobering thought for him. “Wow. That’s huge for you, honey.” He grins suddenly, letting me see how handsome he was before all the world’s troubles wore him down. “When that car hit you, you must have gotten one heck of a bump on your head.”

I chuckle. “Yeah. Maybe that explains everything.”

His smile fades, and I’m determined to do something useful, even if it’s only to help him feel better. “Dad, I’m serious. It doesn’t matter if we lose the house and cars and whatever else. We’ll still have each other. I love you and Mom. You’re all I really need.”

Dad frowns, studying me. “I don’t understand, Sia. I’ve never heard you talk like this.”

“
I know,” I say quietly. “And I’m sorry for that.”

He stands. “Come here.” When we hug this time, he whispers into my ear. “You’re right, honey. We will have each other. And as for the rest . . . well, I guess we’ll cross those bridges when we get there. Together. As a family.”

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

I sit up in bed and stare out at the sunrise. It’s kind of mind-boggling, thinking about everything that’s happened over the past few days. And I’m not even talking about living on the streets and getting hit by a car. In just one day, I learned my friends are vicious and fake, my boyfriend is a jerk, my mother’s an alcoholic, and the family is about to go bankrupt. A lot for a person to take in all at once, but it’s not like I can set any of it aside to think about later. This is my life, for better or worse.

Now that I’ve learned the bad things, though, I have a chance to fix what I can. Life seems determined to beat me back, but I vow to stay strong. For my family. And for myself.

After showering and finding an outfit I’m not completely embarrassed in, I head downstairs.

The dining room is quiet, so I head into the kitchen.

Beatriz is already there, cleaning and humming to herself.

“
Good morning, Beatriz. Where is everyone?” I ask.

“
Your father took your mother to the rehab center this morning.” Smiling, she hands me a glass of orange juice. “She’ll stay a few days, maybe longer.”

The juice is delicious. Fresh squeezed from California oranges.

“
Miss Holloway—”

I hold up one hand. “Wait. Beatriz, do you think you could call me Sia instead of Miss Holloway?”

She frowns. “I’d have to ask your father.”

“
Oh, don’t worry about that. I’ll tell him.” I wink, making Beatriz laugh. A covered basket of freshly baked muffins sits on the counter, so I grab one. “Sorry, you were saying?”

“
Yes,” Beatriz says, her face relaxing into a warm smile. “I wanted to tell you, Sia, that I am really, really proud of you. I heard you say that same thing to your mother last night. I think that’s what
really
made her decide to do it. She needs someone to be proud of her.”

“
Well, I am proud of her,” I say. “Going to rehab takes a lot of courage.”

Beatriz nods. “Yes, it does.”

“
How did she look this morning?”

“
Very good. Like she was almost looking forward to going. She threw away all the bottles this morning. Your father looked better, too. He told me last night was his first good sleep in a long time. I knew that already because most nights, he’s up pacing in the living room, worrying. Not last night, though.”

I smile and nibble at the muffin. I’m glad I’ve helped my family in some way, and I have to wonder if I’ve ever felt this way before. Have I
ever
been kind to people before now? Have I ever considered others’ feelings over my own? The very idea of never having felt empathy toward anyone seems impossible. Yet that was the impression I got from my classmates. “
Worse than Amber . . . ”
they’d said.

I wonder if Amber has any idea how kids look at her. Even worse, does she
care
what they think? She acts as if she’s queen of the school, but everyone outside her little circle regards me, Amber, Stacy, and the others as nothing better than small-minded, selfish jerks. What if . . .

No. It’d be too hard.

But then again . . .

Can I possibly change what’s going on? Can I help my old friends gain some self-awareness? I know that’s quite a challenge, maybe even harder than getting my mother to attend rehab. Because not only are they so deeply entrenched in their way of living that they can’t see out, but none of them have been given the opportunity to step outside of their lives and evaluate themselves. Yes, I’m setting myself up with a big challenge.

Still, if
I
can change—and I’d been the worst of them all—anyone can change.

“
How was school yesterday?” Beatriz asks, sitting beside me with a steaming mug of coffee. She grins wickedly. “I didn’t get a chance to ask you before you left on your little adventure with the cute motorcycle guy.”

I blush. “He
is
cute, isn’t he? I actually didn’t plan on seeing him, but it worked out well, I guess.” I sigh, losing my smile. “School didn’t go so well, though.”

Beatriz pats the back of my hand. The look in her deep brown eyes tells me I have a friend. A real friend. “Maybe today will be better,
mija
.”

“
Maybe. But I’m worried about something else.”

“
What’s that?”

“
If we do lose everything, what will happen to you? Where will you go?”

“
Oh, dear Sia. Don’t worry about me. Another job will come along. Think about yourself and your family right now.” She glances at the clock. “Time to go. I hope you have a better day today.”

“
Thanks, Beatriz.” I hope so, too.

As the car pulls into a spot at school, Stacy comes tearing up to our door. Her tight expression shows concern.

Here we go. I bet a million bucks she’ll start with an “Oh my God!”

“
Thanks for the ride, John,” I say.

“
My pleasure,” he replies. “Have a great day.”

I smile, loving the way his attitude seems to have changed overnight. Maybe I’m achieving something positive after all. I grab my backpack and unlatch the door.

“
Oh my God!” Stacy shrieks as soon as I’m out of the car.

I have to smile. So predictable.

She’s bouncing on her toes with excitement, her fists clenched under her chin. “Your mom called me last night. She was freaked. She called Amber and everyone! She thought you were, like, dead or something. Are you okay?”

“
Yeah. Just went for a walk was all. I needed to clear my mind.”