Signs of Love (31 page)

"And through there is the master bath and that door leads to a walk-in closet."

Alana couldn't resist taking a peek at the bathroom. She'd come this far already... The bathroom was beautifully done with a huge Jacuzzi tub and a separate shower. At one time, this house wouldn't have wowed her. The house Craig had bought for them in Florida had been bigger and more opulent than this place, but after two years of small, cramped apartments, Justin's home did wow her. Or maybe it was because she could picture living there—if she allowed herself to. Which she couldn't.

After leaving the master bedroom, Justin showed them the basement which had a large rec room along with another bedroom, bathroom, and an office. When they were done, Justin locked the house back up again and they headed back across the cul-de-sac.

"So? What do you think?" Justin asked.

Alana kept her gaze on Beth and Daniel's house. "It's lovely. And I know Beth is thrilled to have you so close. I'm sure you'll be very happy there."

"I'm counting on it," Justin said.

When they got back to the house, Justin disappeared with Caden into the basement and soon Alana heard the sounds of a video game. She went into the kitchen and sat down on a stool at the counter and laid her head down on her arms. Her heart ached with what might have been. If only she'd been enough for him to want to make room in his life for both of them. Instead, he only wanted Caden and somehow she had to accept that.

Resolutely, Alana pushed herself up and took a deep breath. Pushing aside her thoughts, she began to work on the rest of the meal. By the time Daniel and Beth got home, everything was ready for dinner. She was pleased with how the meal had turned out and even more grateful for the opportunity to do something for the couple.

~*~*~

"So how was your day, Justin?" Beth asked as she cut up a piece of meatloaf for Genevieve.

"It was great actually. Spent most of it in meetings, in addition to getting the keys to the house."

Dan looked at him with an arched brow. "You spent most of it in meetings and it was great?"

"Yeah, I know, right? But the meetings were necessary. I met with my team this morning to let them know about some changes coming in how things are done at the compound."

"What sort of changes?" Beth asked, her brow furrowed. "Are you quitting?"

"No chance of that," Justin assured her with a grin. "But I'm going to start relying more on the competent people on my staff to take on more responsibilities. You know...delegate. I mean, if I'm going to come home every night I can't be doing the long training sessions like I have been. These past three weeks have shown me that."

Beth smiled. "It's about time! That's the best news I've heard in ages. Well, next to hearing you got that house."

"I also met with Marcus and Alex this afternoon to let them know how things were going to be changing."

Beth's expression dimmed a bit. "How did they take that?"

"Surprisingly well, actually. They've been after me for a while to use the people on my team more. It doesn't mean that I won't ever participate in the training exercises, but I will pick and choose which ones I do. They were very supportive of the changes as well."

"Well, it's about time, man," Dan said as he leaned back in his chair. "So what's prompted the changes? We've been after you to do this for ages."

"Guess I was just a little slow on the uptake." Justin managed to keep from looking at Alana. "I've realized that I need to make some changes in my life to make room for things that are more important than my job."

“I never thought I'd see the day," Dan said with a laugh. "But you're making the right decision."

Alana had remained quiet during the entire exchange and seemed intent on pushing around the food on her plate rather than eating it. As he watched her, Justin knew he wasn't going to be able to drag out the courtship the way he'd originally planned. Between Becca's stupid remark on Friday night and the fact that Alana had broken it off in the first place, Justin was afraid she wouldn't understand that he was doing this all for her. For them. The three of them. 

Suddenly, the idea of waiting to let her know was intolerable.

He chanced a glance at Alana and found her watching him. Their gazes locked, but he couldn't read anything in her expression. Did she understand? 

No, maybe she didn't. Maybe her past kept her from realizing that yes, she was
that
important to him. But he'd laid the groundwork with the changes he'd been making and with the house. Now—well, not right then—but soon, it would be time for words. She was ready for it.

Justin couldn't describe the feeling he'd had when he'd seen her arms that night at the barbecue. Bare. Her scars out there for everyone to see. And even now, she wore a short-sleeve T-shirt that fit her better than what she usually wore. Just as he was coming to terms with some things in his life, it appeared she was too. He just hoped it meant that she was open to hearing what he had to tell her.

~*~*~

Alana pushed a chunk of meatloaf around on her plate. What she'd already eaten sat heavy in her stomach. Justin's revelations had taken her completely off-guard, and she was a bit confused. That day in the park, he'd accepted her decision to end things between them. Hadn't he? Was he really making these changes in order to make room in his life for her and Caden? Or was he making these changes so that when the
right one
came along, his life was ready for her?

She really, really hoped it was the former. Every night she'd prayed that God would take away the feelings she had for him, but every single day they were still there, firmly ensconced in her heart. Maybe God hadn't answered her prayers because he had other plans for her...for them. 

Those thoughts just kept going around and around in her head as they finished eating and began to clean up. All of them pitched in—even Caden—so it didn't take long.

"Alana?" 

At the sound of her name, she looked over at Beth. "What?"

"Daniel and I are going to take Genevieve to get some ice cream. I just asked if it would be okay if we took Caden as well."

"Uh, sure." She motioned Caden over and explained to him about going to get ice cream. 

Is Justin coming too?

Was he? Alana had no clue. She had a feeling she'd been so caught up in her thoughts she'd missed part of the conversation. She looked over to where Justin stood, a hip braced against the counter, arms crossed. "He wants to know if you're going too."

"No. But I'll be here when he gets back."

Okay...

She signed Justin's answer and wasn't surprised at the disappointment that crossed Caden's face.
He'll still be here when you get back.
 

Alana pressed a fist against her stomach to try and contain her nerves. She wasn't nervous about Beth and Daniel taking Caden out. He'd gone with them on a few different occasions. Daniel had downloaded an app on his phone that Caden could use to communicate if signs weren't working.  No, she was nervous about why it seemed that she wasn't going and neither was Justin.

"Let's go, kiddo," Daniel said with a wave of his hand.

With one last look, Caden took Beth's hand when she held it out to him and followed Daniel and Genevieve to the front door. Even after it had opened then closed, Alana stood frozen in place but she managed to say, "Didn't feel in the mood for ice cream?"

She glanced at him, not surprised to find him watching her. 

Justin lowered his arms as he straightened away from the counter. "Not really. What I feel in the mood for is a bit of conversation with you." He jerked his head toward the back door.  "Join me on the deck?"

She nodded then followed him as he led the way out of the house. The warmth of the early evening air brushed across her skin once clear of the air conditioning inside. And yet a shiver raced up and down her spine.

Justin gestured to a couple of chairs that sat on the end of the deck opposite to the barbecue. He waited while she sat down and then he pulled the other chair so that it faced her. Her heart thudded in her chest as she watched him sit down, his long legs spread so that her knees were between his. She clasped her hands in her lap and took a deep breath.

He leaned forward, bracing his arms on his thighs, his blue gaze on hers. She studied the familiar angles of his face. Any woman would consider him attractive, but Alana knew that his true beauty came from inside. The protectiveness he had toward those he loved. The compassion and love he'd showed Caden.

"I know that you wanted to end things between us because you didn't I could make the necessary changes. As much as I didn't want that, I realized that I needed to show you—not just tell you—that you were important enough to me to make those changes. The house. The changes with my job. I've done it all because...." He stopped and looked down at his hands where they were interlaced nearly touching her knees.

Her breath seemed to catch in her lungs when she saw his jaw tighten right before he looked back at her. Though his expression was tense, his eyes showed the emotion he was feeling. When he reached out to cover her hands where they lay in her lap, Alana stared down at them then slowly loosened her clasped hands. His fingers slipped around to hold hers, his thumbs resting on the backs of her hands. When his fingers tightened momentarily on hers, Alana looked up. 

Justin cleared his throat as their gazes met. "I've done it all because I love you."

The air rushed from Alana's lungs. Was she dreaming? She realized she'd tightened her grasp on his hands when she felt his thumbs move across her skin. "Are you sure? I mean, we haven't known each other very long."

Justin's head dropped forward for a moment and Alana wondered if she'd ruined the moment, but when he looked back up, there was a smile on his face. "Yes, I'm sure, but I understand if you need more time. I just need to know that you'll give me a chance to show you how much I love you and that I'm more than willing to do what it takes to keep you in my life. I believe that God brought you into my life to show me that He had a much better plan for me than just focusing so much on my job. People are important.
You
are important. I don’t need more time to know that."

"What about Caden?"

"What about him?" Justin tipped his head. "He knows I love him. This right here isn't about him. It's about you and me. All I need to hear from you tonight is that you'll give me—us—another chance. Will you do that, sweetheart?"

Alana stared at him. Did she dare hope? Did she dare take the risk? Did she trust this man to take care of her heart? The answer, of course, was yes. She'd already trusted him with Caden and that boy
was
her heart. 

Freeing her hands from his, Alana reached out and cupped his cheek, feeling the roughness of the stubble there against her palm. His hand covered hers, trapping her hand in place. She smiled as she lifted her other hand and made a sign. 

Justin's gaze dropped to her hand momentarily before shooting back up to meet hers. When the muscles of his cheek moved, she felt as much as she saw the smile curve his lips. He lifted his hand and made the sign with his fingers and pressed them against hers. 

I love you
.

Then he leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers in a soft, lingering kiss. When their foreheads touched after the kiss, Alana gave voice to her sign of love. "I love you, Justin."

EPILOGUE

Alana smiled as she watched Than’s image on the large screen at the end of the room. She and Justin had been invited to celebrate Lindsay’s birthday along with other friends and family. Just a year ago she would never have imagined being part of a group like this. A circle of friends—not just acquaintances, but real genuine friends who knew all about her and loved her anyway and whom she loved in return.

Of course, the one she loved the best—aside from Caden—was the man sitting beside her. When the video had started playing on the far wall, Justin had scooted his chair beside hers so he could see. His thigh pressed to hers and he had an arm across the back of her seat. She could feel his fingers playing with a strand of her hair while he held her hand with his other hand.

What a difference a few months made. Since that night in late June when they’d shared their love on the back porch of Beth and Daniel’s house, things between them had only strengthened. She and Caden still lived in Beth and Daniel’s basement, but a lot of their time was spent with Justin at his house across the cul-de-sac. The result of them spending so much time together was that Justin’s ability to communicate with Caden through signs had improved significantly. Some days Alana was amazed at how easily Justin incorporated signs into his conversations with her and Caden.

A gasp from those around her drew Alana’s attention back to the present in time to see that Than had surprised by showing up in person. With a ring. When those around them surged to their feet to congratulate the couple, she and Justin did as well. He kept his hand on her lower back as they moved to where Than and Lindsay stood.

“Congratulations, man,” Justin said as he reached out to give his friend a quick hug. “You really managed to pull that off.”

“You knew about it?” Alana asked in surprise.

“Well, sure.” Justin smiled. “Than recruited several of us guys to help him with the idea.”

“And you didn’t tell me?”

“Ah…we were sworn to secrecy. Bro code.”

They laughed as Alana gave Lindsay a hug. “Congratulations, Lindsay. I’m so happy for the two of you.”

Before Lindsay let her go, she whispered, “Maybe you’re up next.”

Alana felt heat flood her cheeks as she pulled back and smiled at her friend. “You never know.”

Not wanting to monopolize the couple, she and Justin returned to the table they shared with Beth and Daniel as well as a Trent and Victoria and Eric and Staci. The conversation that flowed around her filled her with a peace and contentment she’d never imagined might be hers. She knew she was blessed and thanked God each day of her life for that.

~*~*~

Justin pulled his truck into the garage of his house. Some days he had to give himself a shake to make sure it was really real. The shift in priorities over the past several months hadn’t left him resentful like he’d worried it might. Instead, having the love of his life and her son at the top of that priority list had filled him with a joy he’d never thought was possible. Though there had been moments of frustration, they had pertained mainly to his job and the inability to track down the shooter responsible for the attack on the training exercise. But the joy in the other part of his life far overshadowed that.

“Want to come sit out back for a bit?” Justin asked as he turned off the truck.

Alana glanced at him as she undid her seatbelt. “What about Caden?”

“He’s asleep, right? And Dan and Beth will be there if he wakes up.” Justin opened his door which flooded the cab of the truck with light. He knew he wouldn’t have to work too hard to convince her.

He rounded the hood of the truck to open her door. Taking her hand, he helped her down from the truck and then they made their way into the house. “Why don’t you go on out? I’ll grab us something to drink and be right there.”

She flashed him a quick smile and squeezed his hand before walking out the back door to the steps that led down to the large deck. When he came out a few minutes later, he found she’d plugged in the little while lights that ringed the deck.

He joined her on the padded bench and set their drinks on the table at his elbow. “Did you enjoy tonight?”

She reached for his hand as she smiled. “I did. That was quite an elaborate thing Than pulled off to propose to Lindsay.”

“Yep. I didn’t expect anything less for those two.” Justin slid his arm around Alana’s shoulders, his fingers drifting across the soft skin of her shoulder.

When she turned and leaned into him, lifting her face, Justin didn’t waste any time lowering his head to press his lips to hers. One of the most beautiful things of the past few months had been seeing her confidence grow in their relationship. In the beginning, he’d been the one to initiate physical contact with her—even something so simple as grabbing her hand as they walked across the Walmart parking lot. Slowly but surely, however, she’d begun to reach out to him.

The first time she’d hugged him without him hugging her first, Justin had felt like his heart was going to explode. He knew then that the parts of her heart that she’d tried to protect were really and truly his. She trusted him. With her son. With her heart. With her love.

When he slanted his head to deepen the kiss, he felt her hand slide up along his shoulder until it cupped the back of his neck, holding him in place. He loved this woman so much. More than he’d ever thought possible.

Without breaking the kiss, Justin lifted her onto his lap, his hands resting loosely on her waist, enjoying the feel of the curves of her hips that had filled out once she’d begun eating properly. When she sat back from him a short time later, her quick breaths matched his.

“I love you, babe,” he said, his forehead pressed to hers.

“Love you, too.”

Shifting slightly, Justin reached into the pocket of the dress pants he’d worn for the party for the ring he’d placed there just before coming out on the deck. “I know this might seem less romantic than what we just saw with Than and Lindsay, but this isn’t a moment I want to share with anyone but you.”

Alana gasped as he held up a sparkling diamond ring. Her hands went to her mouth, her eyes wide.

“Will you marry me, babe?” He knew he should have come up with some flowery speech about all the reasons he wanted to marry her, but she knew them all already. Every day he told her why he was happy she and Caden were in his life. All he wanted right then was an answer to his simple question.

“Yes.” Her answer came without hesitation as she reached out to slide her arms around his shoulders and press her face to his neck. “Oh, yes.”

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, understanding that this moment would be emotional for her. After the horrors of her previous marriage, Justin knew it took a lot of strength to agree to enter into another one. But every day he showed her how he was different from her ex. And the fact that she’d answered so quickly showed that she knew he was different. That what they had together would be different.

“Let me put this on your finger,” Justin said and waited for her to sit back, her hands going to the dampness of her cheeks. “I feel like I’ve waited my whole life for this moment.”

Her smile as she held her left out hand to him filled him with contentment. “Me, too.”

“And I want you to know that this ring isn’t just a pledge of my commitment to you. It’s there for Caden too. I want to adopt him.”

If possible, her smile got bigger and tears spilled over. “He’s wanted that forever. For you to be his dad.”

“I know. It’s what I want too. I want both of you.”

After he’d slid the ring in place, Alana lifted her hand and made the
I love you
sign. Justin pressed his fingers to hers then leaned in to kiss her. It was the sign they used the most—the three of them—because it was the one they all understood and shared. A sign of love.

The End

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