Read Silken Dreams Online

Authors: Lisa Bingham

Tags: #FICTION/Romance/Historical

Silken Dreams (32 page)

“No, Jacob! I have to find him. I have to find him!”

“He’s dead, Lettie.”

She bucked against the restraint of his arms. “This is all your fault, Jacob Grey. If you’d simply trusted me—trusted him—none of this would have happened. But you wanted to settle a grudge.”

The words lodged in her throat and her body trembled, her knees giving way. Choking on the heavy dust and her own pain, she sank to the ground, great jagged sobs wracking from her chest and seeming to tear her heart in two.

“No,” she whispered again to herself. “No.”

Despite Jacob’s protests, she waited, huddling with her arms wrapped around her torso, until Mr. Sorenson came from the funeral parlor to poke through the rubble. When he emerged, sadly shaking his head, Lettie felt a numbness enter her limbs and spread through her entire body. And when her mother knelt in the dust beside her and held her close, she was forced to admit that Ethan was actually gone.

Gone.

Epilogue

At the bottom of a small dip of land on the far side of the city cemetery, a simple stone marker had been placed in the earth. Though no sod had been broken, the gathering of mourners was solemn nonetheless.

From her place in the center of the group of people who stood around the marker, Lettie McGuire wrapped her arms around her waist and numbly listened to the final words being spoken by Pastor Phillips. A hot wind blew against her cheeks, reminding Lettie of the fact that she hadn’t cried. Couldn’t cry.

From far away, she seemed to hear Pastor Phillips’s voice—“… ashes to ashes, dust to dust…”—but the words seemed to patter her consciousness like the hollow promise of rain to sun-baked earth.

On the one side, Lettie’s mother stood like a silent bastion of strength, her arm firmly circling Lettie’s waist. On the other side, Jacob stood tall and silent. Except for the Beasleys, Ned, Mr. Goldsmith, Abby Clark, and Mrs. Rupert, the gravesite was bare of any other mourners.

Though many of the townspeople sympathized with Lettie’s loss, a few still felt Ethan’s death had been justified.
Once a thief, always a thief
, a woman had muttered callously. Although Lettie knew that not everyone felt that way, she’d wanted this to be a private affair.

Now that the pastor had nearly finished his remarks, she wanted to grieve alone. The wind seemed to moan around her. The luff of the grass seemed to echo with the whispered promise of might-have-beens. And Lettie wanted nothing more than silence. Peace.

Soon the pastor’s words had melted into the rustle of the grass and a few of the mourners backed away. There was no coffin, no grave, no body. Only a marker placed on a flat expanse of ground in one corner of the cemetery. Yet the sadness of the group had not lessened because of that fact. Instead, their silent sympathy and support had settled around Lettie’s shoulders like the warmth of the sun.

“Lettie, it’s time to go home.”

Though she heard her mother’s words and understood her concern, Lettie shook her head. “I’ll come in a while. You go on ahead.”

Reluctantly, her mother stepped away and motioned for the others to follow her toward the buggy. Soon only Jacob remained behind.

“Come home, Lettie.”

“No. I need to stay. Just a little longer.”

“You shouldn’t be here alone.”

“Go home, Jacob,” she murmured softly. “I’ll be fine. Please.” She glanced up at her brother, and he studied her a moment before finally nodding.

Settling his hat on the top of his head, he glanced at the marker a moment before saying, “It’s better this way. Although Krupp and most of the Star have been taken out of state for trial, there are still a few members who haven’t been apprehended. If Ethan had been here, they would have killed him.”

Lettie didn’t speak. She couldn’t.

“You loved him a lot, didn’t you, Lettie?”

She nodded. “At first I thought I’d dreamed him. He was so… fascinating. So intriguing.” She swallowed against the tightness of her throat.

Jacob hesitated a moment before saying, “He arranged for a wedding gift. It came this morning.”

Lettie watched in confusion as her brother walked toward the buggy and withdrew a large, paper-wrapped parcel from the back. Returning to her side, Jacob placed it in her outstretched hands, waiting for her to adjust to its weight. Then his hand lifted, and he stroked the curve of her cheek.

“I never meant to hurt you, Lettie. Remember that. I only wanted to make things right.” Standing awkwardly before her, he glanced down at his boots, then looked up and drew her into a quick embrace. When he drew back, he planted a soft kiss on her forehead, then strode toward the buggy. Climbing inside, he slapped the reins over the horse’s rump, then guided the animal toward town, leaving his own horse for her to use when she felt like returning.

Lettie stood for long moments, staring at the ever-decreasing size of the buggy, then turned back to the simple marker. Moving forward, she brushed a faint skiff of dust from the top of the marker with one hand.

“I put you on low ground, Ethan. No heights. But, then, I guess it doesn’t really matter, since you aren’t really… here.” Her voice faltered, and she took deep drags of the hot summer air. Glancing up, she could see heavy clouds piling on the horizon. Already the wind was beginning to blow more fiercely, much as it had that night she’d first hidden Ethan in the cellar.

“I received a telegram from your mother, Ethan,” Lettie continued. “She seems very nice. She invited me to come and visit soon. Said she wanted to meet the woman who finally captured her son’s heart and made an honorable man out of him. Hear that, Ethan?
Honorable
. Your family thinks you’re honorable. Even the governor has granted your pardon, though I suppose he’s a little late.”

Her voice grew much softer and filled with regret. “Mama told me this morning that I should go to Chicago right away. She thinks I should get away from Madison and the talk. She even arranged my ticket. But I don’t want to go.” The wind tugged at her skirts and pressed the fabric against her legs. “The garret is lonely without you, Ethan. I think of you every time I step inside. But Chicago would be worse. So big … so empty.”

Glancing down at the heavy parcel in her hands, Lettie hesitated a moment, before tugging at the string and carefully folding the paper back. When she realized it was a thick, heavy book, she frowned in confusion, turning it sideways so that she could read the spine.

Webster’s Dictionary.

“Oh, Ethan,” she sobbed, and her shoulders began to shake as she fought to hold back the tears, but they cascaded over the dams of her lashes, falling with huge drops onto the cover of the book.

Taking a deep, shuddering breath, she tried to stop the sobs, tried to hold back the pain. But she couldn’t. Instead, she squeezed her eyes shut and sank to her knees, clutching the book tightly against her breasts.

The wind ruffled in the grass behind her. Then a deep voice seeped through her torment.

“If I’d known you’d be so upset after finally obtaining your own dictionary, I would have sent you a box of candy.”

Lettie grew still, quiet. Her eyes opened, staring out at the grass.

“Ah, Lettie. Have you spent so much of your life dreaming that you don’t know when fantasy becomes reality?”

Trying to think, trying to breathe, Lettie slowly twisted to look over her shoulder. A few feet away, Ethan gazed at her from a bruised and battered face, his azure eyes filled with tenderness.

“Ethan?” she murmured, in disbelief.

“In the flesh.” His lips tilted in the rare smile she’d come to cherish. One that held Christmas and the Fourth of July wrapped up in the tilt of his lips.

Clutching the dictionary against her chest, Lettie pushed herself to her feet. Still not believing the evidence of her own faculties, her eyes swept over his form from head to toe, absorbing the cuts and bruises on his face, the bandages peeking from the placket of his shirt, and the sling supporting his arm.

“You’re alive?” she whispered, stepping toward him.

“Well, nearly,” he muttered wryly. “With a broken arm and two cracked ribs, it’s a little hard to tell.”

“How?… Why?” She closed the distance between them and hesitantly lifted a hand to touch a gash over his eye. He flinched, then grew still, and a shuddering warmth filled her body when she realized the flesh beneath her finger was real. Very, very real.

“Jacob had a change of heart, Lettie. When he discovered the extent of the Star’s corruption, he found he couldn’t stomach their ways, despite the group’s original intent. He realized the Star was out for blood—my blood—whether or not they could prove my guilt, so he decided to arrange my ‘death’ before they could get to me.” He took a careful breath of air. “Since he had evidence against Krupp and several other members of the group, he thought it would be best if I disappeared until he could arrange for the Star Council’s deeds to be made public. Once he’d leveled charges against Krupp and Stone, he knew I would be a dead man. But if I were already dead…” He shrugged, then winced.

“Jacob was leading me out of the jailhouse so that he could hide me when you came barreling down the street.” His lips tilted in a rueful smile. “He thought you were being pursued by the Star. He couldn’t let them see me, so—luckily—he shoved me into the cellar before going outside again. Some of the floor collapsed, but I survived.”

A short cry of joy burst from Lettie’s throat and she threw her arms around Ethan’s shoulders, then sprang back at Ethan’s hiss of pain.

“Oh, Ethan, I’m sorry.”

“So am I,” he remarked, his voice husky and filled with a tender longing. His azure eyes became dark and serious. “I need to feel you, know you’re with me again.” He held out his good arm in a welcoming gesture. “Let’s try again. More gently this time.”

Slowly, tenderly, she eased into his embrace, resting her head against his chest.

“Why didn’t someone tell me?”

“Jacob didn’t dare tell anyone until Gerald Stone could be apprehended. He was arrested just a few hours ago in Harrisburg.”

Lettie’s hand ran up and down his back. “I love you, Ethan McGuire.”

He leaned back to gaze down at her face. “Do you love me enough to live with the shadow of my past?”

“Yes.”

“Enough to move to Chicago?”

“Yes.”

“Enough to put up with my job as head security for the Wallaby Banks?”

Lettie eyed him in astonishment. “Are you teasing me?”

“No. They seem to think an ex-thief would be an excellent man for the job.”

“Yes. Yes, yes, yes.”

Ethan’s expression grew solemn, and his eyes filled with a warm devotion.

“I love you, Lettie Grey McGuire.”

“Let’s go home, Ethan.”

Ethan smiled and whispered, “Home.”

Very slowly, he bent toward her. Careful of his injuries, Lettie slipped her hands around his nape and met his lips with her own. Softly, tenderly, they sealed their future together with a kiss. And as Lettie heard the distant rumble of thunder, she remembered her first encounter with Ethan McGuire in the barn so many months before.

At the time, she’d thought her fantasies had come to life. She’d thought she would savor a little of the adventure and excitement she’d found in Ethan’s arms, then remember it long after he’d gone. Little had she known on that rainy day so long before that she would emerge from her trials to be the woman of her fantasies. One who was strong and independent. One who had managed the impossible.…

And stolen the Highwayman’s heart.

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Now both Fiona and Jacob have more to lose than either of them bargained for— their hearts.

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To tame the beast in a man, one woman must unleash her own animal nature.

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