Chapter 23
The steamy morning grew hotter as the sun reached its mid-day peak. A.J. and Jason opted to spend the afternoon fishing, in hopes that being out on the water would offer some relief from the relentless heat.
Rain and Allie decided air-conditioned cars and stores were their best bet, so they drove off to visit the outlets a few towns over. They had both agreed that they deserved a little retail therapy.
When they arrived back at the house in the late afternoon, Allie sorted out her kids’ new clothing while Rain laid out strips of bacon in a frying pan. They exclaimed again over the cuteness of all the twins’ matching outfits. Allie laid out the two dresses that Rain had bought for her nieces as well. “Little girls’ clothes are so much fun. That was so thoughtful of you to buy them something. They will absolutely love these.”
“I hope so,” Rain fretted. “They look like the right sizes. I love shopping for both the girls, but I really want to put a smile on little Ella’s face. She’s been through so much.”
“She’s lucky to have such a great auntie.”
“Well, I wish I lived closer to them. Poor Ella has to stay quiet for the next two months while her spleen heals. Can you imagine trying to keep a 7-year-old from doing anything active? I don’t know how Mia will manage. I’m not sure how she lived through the scare, to be honest. Being a mom must be terrifying.”
Allie thought about it for a moment before she began folding the clothes back up. “It is, but it’s also amazing. The amount of love you can feel for a child can just take your breath away.” She laughed and added, “And then there are days that you just want to bang your head against the wall and ask yourself what you were thinking!”
The bacon on the stove began to sizzle and Rain used a fork to move the pieces around the pan. “I’m not sure I could do it. I’m not convinced I could handle the worry, the anxiety, and then the conflict of the teenage years. I mean, I know lots of people do it, but being a good parent requires a lot of strength and dedication.”
“You could do it, Rain, and I have no doubt you will,” Allie said firmly. She looked up from her folding and smiled as Jason came through the front door, carrying his cell phone in one hand and a bottle of water in the other.
“What could she do?” he asked, plunking his phone on the island and peering into the pan. He made an appreciative noise.
“Oh, Rain’s worried that she won’t be a good mom. Meanwhile look who’s taking care of all of us.”
Rain shook her head in disagreement as she opened the bag of plump red tomatoes they had purchased at a farm stand. “The only thing I’m taking care of right now is increasing the temperature in this house from a hundred degrees to a thousand. I don’t know what I was thinking, making the bacon on the stove in this heat. I should have used the microwave.”
Jason put a comforting hand on her shoulder. “You’re going to be a great mom, Rain,” he said with such sincerity it made Rain’s heart thump painfully.
She tried to laugh it off. “Yeah, well, first I’m going to have to find someone stupid enough to marry me.”
“I’ll marry you,” said A.J., coming rapidly down the stairs, fresh from a shower. “As long as you promise to cook like this for me every night.”
Jason’s fingers tightened on her shoulder before he dropped his hand and moved away. “I wouldn’t exactly call this cooking,” she commented. “It’s so hot, I decided on BLT sandwiches. And then of course I turned on the stove in an attempt to make it hotter than the sun in here. I’m going to have to take another shower.”
“Let me know if I can help,” A.J. said, fixing himself a drink. “With dinner or the shower,” he joked.
She rolled her eyes at him. “I think I’ve got it all under control, thanks. But while you’re over there, why don’t you make some margaritas instead. It may not be the best complement for BLTs, but I’m pretty sure frozen drinks are mandatory in this weather.”
By the time they sat down to enjoy the sandwiches, they were on their second round of margaritas. Rain noticed that A.J. was filling his glass only halfway with the slushy yellow mix. Then he was doing his best to be inconspicuous as he added extra tequila and mixed it around with his finger. She checked to see if anyone else noticed this behavior; she figured she was studying his actions a bit more closely since her discovery of the ring. She knew he could hold his liquor—that had become obvious. But the more time they spent together, the more it seemed like he was drinking to escape something. Or someone, she supposed. She prayed that encouraging him to come here hadn’t exacerbated some kind of drinking problem.
A.J. had just refilled his glass again when Allie announced she was going to bed. “Sorry to break up the party this early, but I’m beat.”
“You’re sleeping with me, right?” Rain asked hopefully.
“Again? Oh, fine,” A.J. cut in playfully. He winked as Rain made a face at him.
“I think she means me, A.J., but nice try,” said Allie, stretching her arms up in a dramatic yawn. “And yes, I’m sleeping with you. I don’t know why you even bothered putting fresh sheets on my bed. Remember your promise—you’re supposed to stick with me 24/7.”
Once they were in bed, Rain pulled a single sheet over herself and snuggled as close to Allie as the heat would allow. Having her friends under the same roof again brought her a comfort that was almost palpable. Although she longed for peaceful, uninterrupted sleep, she silently prayed that tonight Brandy would somehow manage to bring them closer to the truth.
****
A sudden shock of icy air surrounded Jason and pulled him out of his dream. A sex dream about Rain, he realized wryly, noting the frustrating signs of his physical arousal as he sat up and turned on the light. Another inexplicable wave of cold washed over him and he grimaced, more from confusion than discomfort. He frowned at the window fan that was struggling to make the room bearable by pulling in the slightly cooler night air. It seemed an unlikely culprit.
He swung his legs out of bed and jumped back when his right foot hit a puddle of chilly water. “What the hell?” he mumbled, looking around the room and finally up at the ceiling for the source. He got up more carefully this time, avoiding the curious puddle and reaching for a beach towel folded on the chair. He swiped at his damp foot, then threw it down on the floor to soak up the water. His full bladder was now his main concern, the memory of the icy blasts that woke him drifting away with the dream.
But as he quietly made his way down the stairs and across the living room to the bathroom, he pulled up short, still managing to stay silent. Rain was on the dark porch, her back to him in the silvery moonlight. She didn’t move; she just stared out toward the lake, looking very fragile in her tiny boxer shorts and camisole. Something about the way she was standing made his heart squeeze painfully, even as he felt the renewed stirrings of arousal. No, he thought to himself in frustration. He was going to leave her alone. Continuing soundlessly to the bathroom, he shut the door and used the toilet.
And then he found himself brushing his teeth and smoothing down his hair, although he knew it was still the middle of the night. Just in case she’s in the kitchen, he told himself. Otherwise I won’t disturb her, he insisted as he shut off the light.
He was halfway to the kitchen when he realized she was gone. Adrenaline shot through his body and carried him back toward the bathroom to check her room. But he saw her then, through the windows and the porch screen, walking toward the water’s edge. A moment of quick relief gave way to panic as he watched her step into the lake. What was she doing? He was literally on the beach before his mind made any conscious decision to go outside and check on her. “Rain!” he called, as he raced toward the pale figure standing in the inky water.
She whirled around, shrieking in surprise and dropping a plastic bottle as her hands flew to her chest. “Jesus, you scared me!” she managed to get out.
“
I
scared
you
?” He had reached her now, and he lowered his voice as the darkness seemed to dictate. “I thought you were going for a midnight dip with Brandy!” He blew out a breath, dragging his arm across the sweat that trickled from his hairline. The water bottle floated beside her ankles, and he snatched it up and handed it to her.
Uncapping it, she took a shaky swig and then replied, “No, I just had a dream and then I couldn’t sleep. It’s so hot. I was going to take a walk, but the water looked so nice and cool. What are you doing up?”
“Something woke me up, and then I saw you on the porch. And I’m not leaving you alone out here, so why don’t we take that walk? My heart rate is through the roof right now anyway.”
Rain glanced back at the house. “I guess a short walk would be okay.” The tremor in her voice betrayed her doubts, but she gave him a wan smile.
They walked side by side, Jason shortening his steps to keep pace with her. They didn’t talk, but just passed the water bottle between them until it was empty. When they were almost to the point where the beach gave way to the woods, Jason turned them around, this time linking his hand with hers.
This is different, Rain thought to herself as they walked in companionable silence. She couldn’t deny that it felt good, though. Looking at their twined fingers, she wished it was more than a simple gesture of comfort from her friend.
He broke the silence, his voice cutting through the thick, sultry heat. “You promised you wouldn’t come back here alone.” It wasn’t a question, just a statement that hung between them while she struggled to collect her thoughts.
“I know I said I wouldn’t,” she replied softly. “But I just kept thinking about Bandit.”
“Who is Bandit? Please don’t tell me we have another ghost.”
His tone made her smile, and the tension in her chest relaxed by a few degrees. “Bandit was my cat—when I was younger. Remember?”
“Sort of. Black and white?”
“Yes,” she replied, a twinge of sadness slicing through her. “I had that cat for five years. And then he disappeared. He just vanished, and I never knew what happened to him. I don’t know if he got hit by a car, or eaten by a predator, or just decided to move on. But I still get upset when I think about him.”
He squeezed her hand in the darkness. “I see where you’re going with this.”
“Bandit was a cat. Brandy was Mrs. Pierce’s flesh and blood. Claudia may not have been a great mother, but she loved Brandy. She has no idea what happened to her daughter, and now she’s running out of time.”
“I get it, Rain. But do you understand how much I worry about you?”
Her heart contracted painfully. “I’m sorry, Jay. I really am. I’m just not used to having anyone worry about me. Rick didn’t so much worry about me as worry about controlling me.”
Jason’s fingers tightened around hers. He started to say something, then stopped. Finally, he just murmured, “I’m sorry, Rain.”
“It’s not your fault. I’m responsible for getting myself into that situation. I was so blind. If I could go back, I’d—”
“What?” he asked in a low voice.
“Nothing. Sorry. I’m still a bit shaken up from my dream.” Her skin tingled where their hands met, and she fought to steady her nerves. “Did you have a dream?” she asked.
“Yeah, I had a dream.” He laughed without humor.
Her eyebrows pulled together in confusion. “Was it funny?”
“Only in the sense that it was about you,” he explained cryptically.
Her breath caught. She cleared her throat, struggling to keep her voice casual. “Uh oh. Was I driving you crazy in the dream as well?” He was pulling her along now, she realized. His steps had gotten longer and faster as they approached the house. “Are we in some kind of hurry?”
He stopped suddenly and spun around, and her forward momentum sent her crashing into him. “Yes, you were driving me crazy,” he said gruffly, as she simultaneously said, “Oops, sorry.”
She looked up at him, trying to keep up with this turn of events, but he didn’t give her time. His strong hands went to the sides of her head and tipped her mouth up to meet his. He kissed her hungrily, almost angrily.
Her thoughts swam incoherently as she felt his heart pounding under the hand she had thrown up to brace herself. Her other hand moved to join it, and they wound their way up his chest to the back of his neck as she lost herself in the bruising kiss.
His hands slid from her head to her waist, then down to the small of her back. She stood on her tiptoes, straining up to him as he pulled her body closer to his. The intensity of the moment was overwhelming her; it felt surreal. Perhaps she was still dreaming.
His roving hand moved under the elastic waistband of her pajama shorts and cupped her bare bottom. The unexpected intimacy made her gasp and break the kiss.
Jason pulled back, searching her face with a piercing gaze. “Do you want me?” he asked, dropping his hands so they were no longer touching.
She closed her eyes in defeat and nodded in the affirmative. “You know I do,” she whispered, but as she reached for him he just grabbed her arm and pulled her toward the house again. He opened the doors to the porch and the house and propelled her through them, then quietly led her up the stairs and into his room.
He pulled her gently through the doorway, turning and backing her against the door as he shut it. “Jason…”she began, but he gripped her arms fiercely and bent his head toward hers. “Rain, you are the
only
one I want,” he said in an achingly sincere voice.
She shook her head weakly. “We can’t. You’re…”
His hands moved up to cradle her face, and he silenced her protest by tenderly rubbing his thumb over her swollen lips. “No. Don’t say it,” he commanded, covering her mouth with his again.
So she didn’t.
Chapter 24
He pinned her against the door, pressing his body against hers and kissing her hungrily. She kissed him right back with the same intensity, dizzy with pleasure. Her desire for him was almost painful, and she wrapped her arms around his neck when he lifted her up and moved her to the bed, lowering their locked bodies down together.
Her tiny pajamas were off in seconds, and he was kissing his way down her body, nuzzling her tingling breasts and her fluttering stomach. When his kisses trailed to her inner thighs, she tensed. This wasn’t something Rick had done with her; the raw, potent intimacy released a shock of panic. She was suddenly reminded of the fact that she had only had sex with one man her entire life, and bitter insecurity sliced through her.