Sinful Resurrection (CSA Case Files 2) (23 page)

“Um, you know, a little bit of advice here,” Jessie said, holding her hand up as if they were in a classroom.  Jax stared at her, wondering if she was just damn naïve or just plain stupid to interrupt one of them when they were on a roll. 
He shared a look with Connor and Kevin, just in case he’d missed something.  No wonder Crest tried to stay out of her youthful grasp.  He’d likely have a heart attack trying to rein her in.  “Emily didn’t
get
that way because of you.  It took two.  As for the day-to-day stuff you’re referring to, she just wants you to be there for her.  It doesn’t take a dominant man to do that, just a decent one.  Women are not that complicated.”

“Really?” Connor asked, sarcasm dripping from his voice. 
He stared at her in disbelief.

“Just go with it,” Jessie said, giving Connor an irritated look.  “We know the facts, but that’s not what he needs to know right now.”

“It was supposed to be you,” Jax said, throwing his hand out to reference Connor.  He finally sat back down, feeling deflated.  “You and Lauren are supposed to get married, have a couple of kids while I looked on and enjoyed the view from the outside.  I was supposed to be the best damn honorary uncle in the Midwest, not a father who doesn’t know shit about babies.  Instead Emily and I are living together before you had the guts to move Lauren in and now you get to be the fun uncle.  That is fucking wrong.”

“Kevin.
Jessie.  Would you give us a moment?” Connor asked, leaning forward in his chair. 

Jax felt a twinge of guilt.  He knew they were worried about him, but there was nothing they could do that would
give him back control of his life.  Kevin just nodded, knowing that enough had been said and walked back to his cubicle.  Jessie twisted one of her brown curls, as if contemplating leaving them to themselves.  Eventually, she blew at her bangs and spun on her heel, heading back to the front of the office.  Jax once again ran a hand down his face feeling exhaustion set in.  He momentarily wondered what it would feel like when he had less sleep due to getting up for middle of the night feedings.  It amazed him how life could change on a dime.

“Jax, do you love her?”

It was such a simple question and one Jax knew the answer to.  But didn’t Connor know that loving Emily didn’t fix the current problems?  His feelings only exacerbated them. 

“You love Lauren, right?” Jax threw the question back at his friend.  He waited for Connor to nod in answer.  “I know that Ryland mentioned her name in Paris, but really stop to think what it would be like to have him target her and not know when, how, or where he would try to take her from your life.  Then
on top of it all, discover that she’s pregnant and throwing up morning, noon, and night.  And there is nothing you can do about any of it.  You can’t make it better, you can’t make it go away, you only get to stand back and watch it all fucking unfold.”

“
Would you rather not have the chance?” Connor said, his words meant to put things in perspective, but they were like fucking nails on a chalkboard. 

“I get it.  I do.”  Jax leaned his head back against the leather of his chair and stared at the ceiling.  “I’ll talk with Emily tonight, but you know that I’ve never been good at that sort of thing.”

“What?  Like I’m a poster boy for that myself?” Connor asked, obviously taking offense.  But then his voice softened, imparting how much he truly loved Lauren.  “I get that you feel vulnerable, man.  Emily is your Achilles heel and if there is anyone in this world that could get you to beg for mercy, it’s her.  Be glad that she wants it the other way around.  So be the man she needs right now.”

“I take
it you spoke with Lauren?” Jax asked, bringing his gaze back down and zeroing in on Connor.  He felt a little like his old self and the need to go home and be there for Emily.  Connor was right and it was time that he stepped up to the plate.  Maybe he wouldn’t wait for tonight.  “Do you know what their plans are for this morning?”

The way Connor just shook his head and shrugged gave Jax the indication that he didn’t want to know.  But now his curiosity was spiked and he turned in his chair, deciding to call her himself.  They had made an agreement that they would always answer each other’s calls, specifically due to Ryland still being out there.  He pressed the speed dial and listened to the ringing on the other end.

Emily didn’t pick up.  Fear, angst, and irritation all came together as a ball in his chest and he quickly disconnected as he heard her voicemail initiate.  Speed dialing one of the numbers he’d placed in his phone after being given it by Emily’s detail, the phone was answered on the first ring.

“Chuck, where is she?” Jax asked, leaning back in his chair and cross
ing his one arm across his chest.  He resisted the urge to tap his foot, just in case Connor was still watching.

“They’re in some hair salon.”  A slight muffling sound came from Chuck’s end of the line, indicating that he was outside on the street.  He must be facing the wind.  Jax wanted to turn and ask Connor what he thought he knew about the girls’ afternoon, but didn’t want to cave in and give him the satisfaction.  “They’re both getting their hair and nails done.  Lionel went into the alley, covering the back entrance.”

“Let me know when she heads home,” Jax instructed, hanging up and dropping his cell on the desk.

“I’m heading out,” Connor said from behind Jax.  “Kevin needs help on that case involving the
professional girls on the street corner.”

That grabbed Jax’s attention and he looked over his shoulder.  “Did the police
find that girl?”

  “Yeah,” Connor said, sorrow lacing his tone.  They dealt better with government contracts than the cases that hit so close to home.  “
It’s now ruled a homicide.”

Jax nodded, unhappy with how this was going to affect Elle.  It was actually her that had urged
the parents of one of the rape victims to contact CSA.  Kevin was just the likely agent to take the case since he worked the streets and had the snitches on speed dial.  This just upped the ante and he knew that Kevin wouldn’t rest until this killer was brought to justice.

“Let me know if you guys need any help.”  Jax waved a hand toward his monitor.  “I’ll just be here trying to make sense of
all the data that Taryn’s burying me with.”

Connor slapped him on the shoulder and then took his leave.  He could hear Kevin and Connor talking on their way out and wondered if he should give Elle a call now.  Thinking better of it, knowing she was probably just getting up for the
day, Jax would wait until this evening.  She was a night owl and with her added insomnia, the more sleep she was able to get the better.

Jax spent the afternoon sifting through data and sitting with Taryn as she’d enter the information into some program that was s
upposed to make any connections should they be there.  The only link they had so far was Ryland’s time in New York around Christmas, but Jax wasn’t comfortable waiting that long to try and nab the son of a bitch.  He honestly didn’t think Ryland would wait that long to come after Emily anyway.

“Ryland is good,” Taryn said, sipping on some tea that she’d gotten addicted to lately.  She set her cup back down on a heating tray that she had set up by her various monitors.  “I’ve been thinking it over and I cannot for the life of me figure out why he would attend a public function to get the hit information on Emily.  It doesn’t make sense.  He is so smooth and polished when it comes to these things.”

“What if those were his instructions?” Jax asked, playing devil’s advocate.  Taryn was smart and once she got a whiff of something, it was like a dog in search of his bone.  She wouldn’t let go until she’d figured it out.  He would just try to guide her to finding the bone they needed.  “What if in order for him to get that business, that’s how he had to get it?”

“He doesn’t need business.”  Taryn picked up one of the many pencils lying around and tapped it against the desk.  “Ryland doesn’t need anything. 
There has got to be a reason he went there, risking exposure.”

“Someone on the guest list?” Jax asked, throwing it out there.  “You say he doesn’t have any close connections with anyone, but what if he did in his former life?”

Taryn shoved the pencil behind her ear and Jax was amazed that the action didn’t move a strand out of place.  Her spikey blonde hair was set with some type of gel and he eyed it warily, wondering if the shit was made of super glue.  Her fingers flew over the keyboard as her glasses slid down her nose.

“What are you doing?”

“Going through the guest list.”  Taryn pointed to one of the screens, which now had three hundred names listed in front of them.  “No crumb is going to be left on the ground by the time we are done.  If we can’t investigate Ryland, then we investigate them.”

“Three hundred people?” Jax asked, raising an eyebrow.  He thought about Emily and if he hadn’t just had a come to
Jesus meeting with Connor, then he would have offered to pull an all-nighter.  As it was, he was anxious to get home to her…if she ever showed up.  He glanced at his watch.  “All right.  Print the list off and I’ll start looking into them tomorrow.”

“I’ll do it,” Taryn replied, shaking her head.  She hit the print button and rolled her chair to the side, waiting for the paper to slide out of the printer.  “Go home to Emily.”

“What?”  Jax shot her a look.  “Did everyone hear our conversation?”

“You have to ask?”

Jax laughed, knowing that private conversations didn’t take place in this office.  He stood up, watching Taryn as she started to dive into the potentially vital information.  They were assuming much…that Ryland had any sort of life before becoming a contractor, but it was better than nothing.  He did look at Taryn a little quizzically, not liking how much time she’d been putting in at the office.  He’d been working twelve hours a day but she’d been putting in more.  It was like she’d developed a fascination with Ryland.

“Split the list,” Jax instructed, walking to the door.  Her office, which had once been the conference room, was straight across from Crest’s.  His desk sat empty, but Jax made a mental note to speak with him tomorrow to ask if he’d heard from Schultz lately.  Maybe th
at was an avenue they could tap should the well dry up here.  “I’ll see you tomorrow.  Don’t stay late.”

Jax looked over his shoulder one last time to catch Taryn’s dismissive wave, already ca
ught up in her research.  Again he got a strange feeling that didn’t settle well over him.  He’d start checking in with her more often, making sure she was leaving at a decent time in the evenings.  Walking towards his cubicle, he felt his cell phone vibrate in the front of his jeans.  Pulling it out of his pocket, he saw that it was Chuck.

“Hey, everything all right?” Jax looked down at his watch, seeing that it read four in the afternoon.  “The women done with their spa day?”

“Um, about that,” Chuck said hesitantly, causing Jax to be instantly on alert.  “They’re entering your club…now.”

Jax had to have heard wrong.  “I’m sorry.  I thought you said they were going into Masters.”

“That is what I said.”

Jax stood there, staring at his monitor as if he could visualize
Emily and Lauren outside of the club.  It would be locked up tight.  Elle didn’t open the doors until eight o’clock at night, although sometimes six o’clock depending if they were having a social hour for the public.  There shouldn’t be anything to worry about, although he did have to wonder why Lauren would have even have taken Emily there to begin with.

“The place isn’t open,” Jax said with reassurance, dropping back into his chair.  He might as well finish up some loose ends until he knew that Emily was home.  “When they head back to our place, let me know.”

“I said they were walking in, not standing outside of it,” Chuck said, very specifically.  “Your pretty manager lady let them in already.”

Jax shot out of the chair, grabbing his keys and skullcap.  Son of a bitch.  What the hell did they think they were doing?  Emily was pregnant, for God’s sake.  If she’d wanted a tour, why didn’t she just fucking ask for it?  He winced, reality hitting him that she probably had and he’d swept her request under a rug.

“I’ll be there in ten minutes,” Jax said, walking through the expansive area and into the foyer of their offices.  “Keep them there until I arrive.”

Chapter Twenty-Eight

“
It’s nice to meet you,” Emily said, smiling at Elle.  She’d heard so much about this woman from Jax, Connor, and Lauren that Emily felt as if she already knew her.  What she hadn’t expected was for Elle to be so svelte and tall. “A little birdie told me this place wouldn’t run without you.”

A light laugh escaped Elle and the smile radiated her face as she shared a look with Lauren.  “I think that’s an exaggeration, but I appreciate the sentiment.  It’s nice to meet you as well.  When Lauren called, I was surprised you wanted to stop by.  Nothing happens until eight at night.”

Emily looked around the entry hall, although her eyes had to adjust to the dimness of the room.  The lighting was more golden, casting sensual shadows among the walls.  A hostess stand was situated before a door, its cherry wood color seeming alive with the swirls of reds and browns.  The area gave off such an erotic vibe she couldn’t wait to actually see the inside.

“I just wanted to see what it looked like,” Emily said, her smile falling just a bit.  She didn’t want to reveal too much of what she and Jax were going through right now.  Looking at Lauren and the box
that she held in her hands, Emily grabbed onto the other excuse as well.  “Plus, Lauren had to drop off some new implements that Connor had ordered for the club.”

Elle nodded her head in acceptance.  “Yes,
he mentioned something about that.  Let me give you the tour while Lauren goes and hangs up what she brought.”

With that said, Elle leaned over the hostess stand and must have pressed a button, for a slig
ht buzzing noise could be heard along with the clicking of a latch being released.  Elle walked to the door and swung it open, revealing an entirely different world to Emily.  She felt like she was stepping into Wonderland.

The walls were made of d
ark English walnut.  A specific fragrance hung in their air and it took a moment for Emily to figure out it was an orange scent mixed with leather.  Not wanting to miss a thing, she slowly followed behind Elle.  A bar lined up the left side of the area, with mirrors and lighting set up behind the counter.  Black leather stools were situated in front and the brass of their footstools glinted in the spotlights that were glowing down from the ceiling.  It had somewhat of a nightclub feel to it, although Emily had a feeling it wouldn’t seem like that during actual play.  

Her eyes followed along the path of what seemed to be a line of seating areas, separated with palms and ferns.  The plants acted as a screening and created an aura of privacy.  Emily
kept perusing the room and finally halted when her eyes landed on the right side of the room.  Red velvet ropes attached to brass poles cordoned off the play areas.  The gold stands gave off an antique appearance and somehow softened what she imagined actually took place behind them.

“I can see from your expression that this is not what you thought the club would look like,” Elle said, amusement lacing her tone.  “If you think it’s interesting now, wait until you see the action at night.  Your eyes will be glued to the stations.”

Emily gave her a smile, not wanting to really reply and not needing to, since she wasn’t asked a question.  Searching for Lauren, Emily saw that she had walked straight to the far wall and placed down the box.  The hooks held various implements which had obviously been adorned with gems by Lauren.  The array of items was fascinating, but Emily wanted to peruse the stations first.  As if sensing Emily didn’t want to get caught in too much of a personal conversation with Elle, Lauren walked back to them.

“Elle, can I have your help in arranging the new items?” Lauren asked, stopping in front of them.  “I also want to wipe them down one more time.  Do you have extra cleaning solution or should I use what’s over there?”

“I’ll grab another bottle from the back,” Elle replied, starting to walk towards a small room that was situated by the bar.  “Do either of you want something to drink?”

They declined and
both watched Elle walk across the room.  “Thank you,” Emily said.  “She doesn’t know who I really am and I really didn’t want to explain that Jax and I haven’t played in a club together.  All she knows is that I’m Jax’s girlfriend.  It might instigate her to ask more questions had I gone into detail and you know I can’t tell her.”

“I understand,” Lauren replied, placing a hand on Emily’s shoulder
and giving her a squeeze.  “Explore.  Honestly, I’d be surprised if Jax didn’t arrive within a half hour.  You know that Chuck called him.”

“
Good old Chuck.”  Emily shook her head, knowing the guy was just doing his job, but having him hang outside the salon doors was not a convenient thing for her.  “On the bright side, I was able to get my hair dyed back to my natural color.  Who knew that hair dyes weren’t dangerous to J.J.”

“You crack me up.  Even Connor’s taken to calling your baby J.J.”  Lauren looked up, causing Emily to do the same.  Elle was walking back toward them with a spritz bottle and a blue rag.  She lowered her voice.  “I personally think it’s a girl.  Now go see what you can before Jax comes and drags you away.  By the way, your hair looks fantastic!  Seeing you like this will certainly give Jax the kick in the ass he needs.”

Emily waited until the two women were back over to the far wall and pulling things out of the box.  Turning toward the play stations, her eyes zeroed in on the spanking bench.  She’d only ever seen one on the Internet and found the piece of BDSM furniture fascinating.  She and Jax had only ever played privately; those first seven days they were together was more of an introduction into a lifestyle he loved.  Since they’d been home, Jax hadn’t mentioned the club in relation to them and she hadn’t pushed.  After seeing this and recalling what he said outside of the United Nations’ buildings, maybe it was time to do so.

Closing the distance, Emily couldn’t prevent herself from reaching out and touching the black leather that encased the bench.  It tilted slightly downward, with four shelves that had straps, which she knew to be for the arms and legs.  A shiver of excitement ran through her at the thought of J
ax placing her on such a device, not allowing her to move and being at his mercy.  So many things had changed since their time at the cabin in Lake Michigan and she wanted what they had back. 

The hanging X in the corner garnered Emily’s attention and she walked over to it, following the chains with her
eyes as they went up and up, finding that they were attached to hooks in the ceiling.  It looked like a St. Andrew’s cross, only horizontal.  This section was larger than some of the others, giving a wide berth in which the Dom could play.  From what she gathered, the submissive would be lying on either side, wrists and ankles strapped to each end, keeping them spread eagle.  Emily had never given Jax the slightest hint that she wouldn’t want to play at a club and felt irritation start to flow through her at his obvious assumption.

The banging of the door had her drawing her weapon and facing the door within seconds.  Jax stood there, the brown of his hazel eyes seemingly flashing even at this distance.  Elle’s gasp was audible and Emily winced, wondering how she was going to explain why she was carrying a weapon, let alone her actions.  Shit.

“Elle,” Jax called out, his voice carrying across the room.  He never removed his gaze from Emily and she just knew that something was different now.  It seemed as if the old Jax was back and she would freely admit that her body responded in kind.  “Could I speak with you a minute?”

“Of course
.” 

Elle gracefully walked across the room, warily looking at Emily now.  The last thing she had wanted was to alarm Elle.
Emily quietly replaced her handgun in her holster, sensing Lauren coming her way.  He had told Emily some of Elle’s background and what the woman had gone through was something Emily wouldn’t wish on her worst enemy. When the tall raven haired woman finally reached Jax, they spoke in hushed tones.

“Don’t worry,” Lauren sa
id, finally standing beside her. “Jax will come up with a good cover story.”

“It’s hard,” Emily said, watching Elle as she listened intently to what Jax was saying.  “Remembering a past that doesn’t belong to me.”

“At least you are still Emily.  That’s got to count for something, right?”

Emily nodded, knowing she had a lot to be grateful for. 
“Why don’t you head on home?  I’m sure Connor is waiting for you and I’ve had you running around all day.”

“I kidnapped you, remember?”  Lauren bumped shoulders with her and got the laugh she’d obviously been hoping for.  “Besides, I had fun.  Be safe.”

“You, too.”

Emily watched her friend cross the r
oom and say goodbye to Jax and Elle.  Emily would really like it if she and Elle could be friends as well, but would wait to hear what Jax said to her before attempting another conversation.  They all needed to be on the same page. 

Another few minutes of conversation and Elle didn’t look too happy.  Emily tensed, thinking it had to do with whatever story Jax came up with in regards to her pulling her weapon. 
Her mind changed when Kevin walked in behind them.  Elle’s body language immediately altered.  Emily debated on whether she should cross the room and join in on the conversation, when Jax started speaking with both of them.  Within a minute, both Kevin and Elle were walking back out the door, although Elle didn’t look too pleased with the situation.  Emily wasn’t so sure what she felt at the precise moment.  Jax turned around, faced her, and then flashed that smile that she’d come to love but hadn’t seen in weeks.  This was her Jax and for the first time since they’d arrived in Minneapolis, Emily felt like she’d just been welcomed home.

* * * *

Jax waited until Kevin and Elle had left the main room of the club before facing the most beautiful woman he’d ever set eyes on.  Emily stood there, her newly chestnut colored hair shimmering underneath the spotlight above her, with a similar twinkle in her blue eyes.  Her pink lips were parted with a natural sheen on the plush flesh and her cheekbones were flush with color.  There was a radiance about her that called to every dominant gene inside of him and he wanted nothing more than to personally give her a tour of this place that he loved.

“Before I give you the personal tour, would you like to tell me why the hell you didn’t answer your phone like promised?”

“Lauren took me out for the day.  We had fun, and for the first time I feel somewhat normal.”  Emily gave a little toss of her hair and the long natural waves fell behind her back.  “I must have been sitting under the dryer because I didn’t hear your call.  I never even thought to check it when we decided to walk over here.  I’m sorry.”

Jax fisted his hands to prevent him from lecturing her
and ruining what stood to be a promising evening.  Walking the city streets?  Did she want to go around with a target taped to her back?  With the uncertainty of Ryland’s actions, they couldn’t be too careful.  On the other hand, he understood Connor’s sentiment that they still needed to live their lives.  It was such a fucking catch twenty-two.

“No morning sickness today?” Jax asked, focusing on her statement of feeling back to normal.  “Do you think it’s past?”

“I wouldn’t say that,” Emily replied with a half smile.  She still stood next to some of the play stations, so he started to walk slowly toward her.  “This morning wasn’t so good, but I’ve been doing okay this afternoon.  You know that the doctor said it would probably last throughout the first trimester.”

“I can keep hoping it doesn’t,” Jax said, returning her smile.  He stopped when he was a foot away.  Staring at her beauty made it hard for him to formulate the words, but he needed to wipe the slate clean.  “
If it feels like I haven’t been here for you, I apologize.”

Emily’s
blue eyes widened in surprise and if he’d felt like a heel before, he felt like one now.  Jax never meant to give her the impression that he wasn’t man enough to face his mistakes.  He was dominant by nature, but that didn’t mean he didn’t own up to his responsibilities.

“I could give you reasons, like seeing you sick day in and day out literally kills me on the inside.”  Jax was grateful she remained silent while he got this off of his chest. 
He wanted her aware of how every little thing she felt affected him.  “I’m helpless.  There is nothing I can do to make it better and being the man I am, I want to be able to do that.  I want to be your savior.”

“I just need you with me,” Emily whispered, taking a step closer to him.  “I want you by my side.  I don’t want to feel like we’re roommates.”

“Is that how I made you feel?”  Jax felt his chest tighten, hoping that he could fix the damage he’d caused.  He closed the distance between them and captured her sweet face in the palms of his hands.  “God, Emily, I never intended for you to feel like that.  I’ve been going into work early and staying late, doing everything in my power to track down Ryland. It’s all a vicious cycle.  I can’t locate him, we don’t know if he’s moved on, I can’t help you when you’re sick, and I feel completely helpless all around.  This is fucking with my brain and I feel like I’m out of options.”

Jax slid his right hand through her hair, feeling the silkiness
surround his fingers.  It made him think that’s what her soul would feel like should it wrap around his.  It was his fault that their connection was disheveled and he would be the one to mend it.