Skyjackers: Episode 1: A Proper Nuisance (Skyjackers: Season One) (2 page)

Jonathan straightened.
So the villain has been doing his
research
, he thought. “I am an officer of the Regency, sir. We do not cater
to pirates.”

“Pirates?” Caine laughed. “Heh. Awfully presumptuous. Don’t
you think, Lily-Billy?”

“Yes, Father,” Lily said. “I rather do.”

Jonathan touched the hilt of his rapier. “Nomenclature aside,
you’ve stolen from these people. Give back what you’ve taken, or I’ll be forced
to arrest you.”

Benedict groaned. “Ah, yes, this is all very dashing, Mr.
Thorpe. Now leave off, or I’ll have to see your threats and raise you a bit of
violence.”

“I’ve never been much for gambling,” said Jonathan. That was
when he caught sight of the most magnificent creature he had ever seen in his
life. A pirate host was coming down the gangplank of one of Caine’s larger
ships when Jonathan locked eyes with a vision. She was tall and fair-skinned,
with hair like liquid fire. The look she gave him might’ve stopped his heart,
if not for all the pounding it was doing instead.

“There you are, Viv,” Caine said, glancing over his shoulder
at the woman. “How punctual of you.”

“Is
he
the reason my card game has been interrupted?”
Vivian asked, jutting a finger toward Jonathan.

Caine smiled. “The very same. Thank you for your service to
the Regency, Captain Thorpe. My life wouldn’t be nearly so amusing without men
like you to assume deadly risk and long hours in exchange for low pay and
terrible benefits. I’m afraid I must be going now. Do enjoy a rousing, yet
life-threatening contest, compliments of my daughter Vivian. Good day.” With
that, Benedict Caine shuffled off toward his ship.

Vivian drew her cutlass and gave Jonathan a curtsy and a
flourish. “Your move, Captain.”

Jonathan lifted his hands. “There’s no need for bloodshed,
madam.”

She smirked. “Not mine, anyway.”

“I could never hurt a—”

Vivian’s blade flashed.

Jonathan leaned away, avoiding a cut to the face at the last
instant.

“That was smart,” Vivian said.

“
That
was a dirty trick,” said Jonathan, drawing his
rapier.

“I tend to prefer that sort,” Vivian said, before making a
low cut that sent Jonathan hopping backward a step.

Around them, Vivian’s pirates began to engage Jonathan’s
marshals.

“I’ll have you know you’ve just assaulted an officer of the
law,” he said, looking around. “Several, in fact.”

Vivian smiled. “That has a nice ring to it. Feel free to
recount my other misdeeds as they occur.” She lunged, but Jonathan knocked her
blade aside.

“I would prefer it if the misdeeds stopped now.” Jonathan
defended himself from another series of swings before going on the attack.

“You fight well,” Vivian said. “I’m beginning to think you’re
not as green as they say.”

“Who says I’m green?”

“Never mind,” she said, nearly running him through with a
stab.

What a strange and uncivilized woman
, Jonathan
thought. “You’re rather cheeky, aren’t you?”

“That’s what my father says. Though you hardly know me well
enough to make that determination.” She grunted as their swords met and skidded
off one another.

“I don’t know you at all,” Jonathan admitted. “I do know your
father has robbed these innocent people, however. So I’m afraid I’ll have to
ask that he not… do… what he’s doing right now.”

Caine’s ship was lifting off. A man with a paintbrush was
dangling from a rope at the stern, screaming up at the crew about something.
Vivian’s next swing came in low, forcing Jonathan to forget about the fleeing
ships for the moment.

They began to battle in earnest, and Jonathan soon found
Vivian to be more than a match for him. The way she danced, returning his every
stroke with one of her own, reminded him more of a ballroom than a battlefield.
Theirs was a delicate repartee, around tables and through clusters of
overturned chairs. Jonathan couldn’t help but be captivated by her.

“You’re wrong about three things, Captain Thorpe,” Vivian
said. “First, my father is a good man. Second, these wedding guests are far
from innocent.” She paused, breathing heavily.

“And the third?” he asked.

“The third, Captain Thorpe, is that you shall never take me
or any member of my family alive.”

“I’m afraid that’s where
you
are wrong, my lady. The
moment you are disarmed, I will have you clapped in irons and locked in my
ship’s brig, woman or no.”

She frowned. “What’s being a woman got to do with it?”

“Nothing at all. Though I will say—” Jonathan retreated a
step, then advanced again when Vivian stumbled over a downed folding chair, “—I’ve
never met a woman so…”

“Skilled?” she finished.

“I was going to say
impertinent
.”

Vivian knocked away Jonathan’s next two blows, then stepped
forward to drive a shoulder into his chest. He fell backward and landed on the
table behind him, tipped it over and slid head first to the ground on the other
side, legs flopping over him. “Nor have you ever met a woman so strong,
apparently,” she said.

Jonathan could only grunt, wincing at the kink in his neck
and the scrunched feeling in his abdomen. He opened his mouth to speak, but the
ground began to shake so violently it almost knocked Vivian off her feet.
Guests cried out and curled up in little heaps on the ground. There was a
piercing report, like thunder racing through the earth. Next Jonathan knew, the
grass between him and Vivian was splitting apart, a jagged crack that spread
across the field and began to open into a yawning chasm.

Jonathan watched Vivian slide away from him on the shifting
ground. Tables and chairs and wedding guests tumbled into the fissure and
disappeared from view. Vivian sheathed her sword and called across to him.

“We’ll meet again, Captain Thorpe. Best of luck.” She tipped
her hat to him before turning and sprinting toward her ship.

Jonathan picked himself up, careful to make sure he hadn’t
broken anything. He was about to summon his crew back to the
Maelstrom
to give the Caines chase when he noticed something rather peculiar. The patch
of earth on the far side of the chasm appeared to be
rising
. Startled
wedding guests dug their fingers into the grass and held on for their lives as
the rough oval of land beneath them began to lift them off the ground.

What in the heavens is happening?
Jonathan wondered.
He caught a glimpse of Vivian swinging onto the deck of her airship and giving
her crew a boisterous command. She was a wild one, to be sure; free-spirited
and crafty as ever. Had she not been the daughter of the world’s most dastardly
pirate, Jonathan would’ve sworn he was in love.

Screams filled the air as the floating land mass carried the
wedding guests ever higher. That was when Jonathan knew he couldn’t go after
the Caines, though desperate was his desire to do so. There were citizens who
needed saving, and the safety of the people always came first. And so the
pirates fled while Jonathan and his crew remained, using the
Maelstrom
to rescue the guests from their flying prison and return them to safer ground.

When he finally collapsed into his bunk late that night,
Jonathan couldn’t sleep. He kept thinking of Vivian, and of the bizarre
phenomenon that had sent an ordinary parcel of land floating into the sky. The
next morning, Jonathan would learn that the earthquake in Finustria had not
been an isolated occurrence.

Chapter 2

The Caine family congregated in their sprawling mansion
hideaway, deep in the sweltering jungles of Azkatla. Gertrude had commissioned
an extravagant feast to celebrate another successful caper. When the wine
glasses began to ring, she stood, smoothed her skirts, and cleared her throat.

“Isn’t it simply wonderful to be together?” she began. “We
really don’t do this often enough anymore. You don’t know how dreadfully your
father and I miss you when we’re apart.”

Lily reached up to squeeze her mother’s hand.

Junior broke the tenderness of the moment by prancing into
the room, decked out in the Archduchess’s crown jewels, earrings and all. The
family burst into laughter and applause. Junior took his seat with a smug grin—and
without removing a single accessory.

“My precious babies,” Gertrude continued, teary-eyed. “You
all mean the world to me, and your father and I are so proud of each and every
one of you.”

“Except you, June Bug.” Benedict put a teasing hand on his
son’s shoulder and gave him a shake. The girls laughed.

“They’re proud of me most of all,” Misty said. “Right,
Mummy?”

Junior looked at her. “You mean you
least
of all.”

Misty batted the pearl tiara off Junior’s head and sent it
sailing to the hardwood floor.

Junior’s expression passed from surprise to anger. He shoved
her. “You stupid brat.”

Misty upended his wine glass, spilling summer red across the
tablecloth and Junior’s lap. “Dad doesn’t like you the best. He likes
me
the best.”

“Now, children,” Gertrude tried.

The argument escalated, layered voices rising to a crescendo.

“Enough,” Benedict boomed. “Listen to your mother. And one of
you had better pick up that crown this instant, or Daddy is going to be very
unhappy.”

Misty scowled. Junior dabbed at his lap with a napkin.

In the end, it was Lily who slid from her chair and retrieved
the crown for her father. “Why isn’t Uncle Poleax here?” she asked.

Caine turned the crown over in his hands. Every pearl was
intact, thank the heavens. “Poleax isn’t your uncle, Lily-Billy. He’s Daddy’s
second cousin. That makes him your second cousin, once removed.”

“Yes, but Second-Cousin-Once-Removed Poleax doesn’t exactly
roll off the tongue, does it?” Misty said.

“That’s plenty out of you, young lady,” said Gertrude.

“I’m not quite finished, Mummy. Did you see how Vivian was
swooning
over young Captain Thorpe?
I
think she wants a bit of the old
slap-and-tickle from that fellow.”

Vivian frowned. “Do
not
.”

“Alright, that’s the end of it,” Benedict said. “Go to your
room.”

“Who, me?” Vivian asked, mouth agape.

“Not you, Viv. Misty… you heard me. Daddy’s going to be very
cross if you don’t do as he says.”

“But I’m hungry,” Misty complained.

“I won’t say it again.”

Misty mimicked him under her breath as she stomped off.

Caine collapsed into his chair with a sigh. “By all the gods
in the heavens… can this family spend one hour together without us all trying
to strangle one another?”

“I’ve got to go change my pants,” Junior said, stalking off,
pearl earrings still dangling.

“I’m off to find Mr. Mittens,” said Lily, slipping out of her
seat.

Vivian found herself sitting alone with her parents, who
looked at each other and then at her, but said nothing. Father cleared his
throat. Mother took a sip of wine.

“So, that Captain Thorpe is rather a nuisance. Wouldn’t you
agree?” Vivian finally said. “I think he’s dreadfully dull.” In truth, she’d
found him somewhat intriguing, if a bit too straight-laced for her liking. A
sky marshal was no sort of man for her to be thinking about, regardless of how
handsome he may or may not have been…

Vivian’s parents exchanged another look.

“You taught him a lesson, I trust?” said Benedict.

“Yes, Dad. Only… a strange thing happened before we set
sail.”

“What’s that, sweet peach?”

“There was… an earthquake. The ground split open. And then… I
dare say, it started to fly.”

Benedict’s eyebrows went crooked. “The ground?”

“Believe me, it was every bit as strange as it sounds.”

Caine rubbed his mustache. “I’ll have Parsons look into it
first thing in the morning. In the meantime, I want you to take the crown
jewels to Gil Hill and see what you can get for them.”

“Yes, Father.”

***

Later that night, Benedict was nursing a cigar on the
veranda outside the bedroom. He had just begun to doze off when Gertrude found
him.

“You look sleepy, darling.”

Caine twitched awake, dropping the cigar into the folds of
fabric over his belly, where he spent several seconds fumbling for it. “Sweet
giblets
.”

Gertrude sat in the slatted lounger beside him. “Language,
dear.”

“I do believe I nearly burned myself down,” he said, tossing
the cigar into the decorative green ashtray Junior had sculpted for him when
the boy was nine.

“Oh, don’t be so dramatic. It isn’t my fault you’ve got the
hearing of a garden snail.”

“What are we going to do about these children of ours,
Gertrude? They’re unruly. Churlish.”

She looked at him. “They’re exactly the way we raised them.”

“Bollocks. You’re right,” Benedict said, folding his arms.
“Who could’ve imagined it? They’re all perfect scoundrels. The world appears to
be coming apart at the seams, and so is the family we’ve created together. Oh,
Gertrude…”

“The world may be coming apart, Benedict, but this family is
not,” Gertrude said. She softened. “So the children are squabbling. Let them
express their differences. It’s healthy for them.”

“I’m not talking about that little tiff before dinner. I’m
talking about this new infatuation of Vivian’s.”

Gertrude giggled. “Oh, Ben. It’s hardly an infatuation. She
is
getting to be that age, you know.”

Benedict frowned. “What
age
? I know of no such age in
all the world.”

“She’s growing up, dear.”

“Nonsense. I won’t allow it.”

Gertrude smiled. “You’re a capable man, my darling. But
you’re not capable of stopping a girl from becoming a woman.”

Benedict grunted his displeasure. “Bah. Poppycock.”

“Language, dear.”

***

Vivian found her brother beside the swimming pool,
hands folded behind his head, gazing up into the night sky.

“The cosmos are a baffling, wonderful mystery,” Junior said.
“Don’t you think?”

Vivian hadn’t given the cosmos more than a moment’s
consideration in all her life. “Not really,” she said.

“Oh, ye of small mind,” said Junior, less concerned with her
level of interest than with sounding intelligent. “I assure you, you are
mistaken. For instance, did you know shooting stars are actually airships that
flew too close to the sun and caught fire?”

Vivian rolled her eyes. “Let me guess… Father told you that.”

“No,” Junior said defensively. “Why would you assume that?”

“Because whenever you think something’s true, and it isn’t,
it’s always something Father told you.”

“Well… so what if it is? Who are you to say it isn’t true?”

“You shouldn’t believe everything Father tells you, you know.
As a matter of fact, you shouldn’t believe most of it. These ‘
little-known
facts
’ of his are seldom facts. More often, they’re fabrications.”

“That doesn’t make any sense. Why would Father lie to me?”

“Well… because he’s a pirate, for one. Also, he isn’t awfully
fond of you.”

“Rubbish. I’m Father’s favorite. He’s told me so. On several
occasions.”

Vivian laughed. “I seem to remember an occasion very recently
when he said as much to me. Now I think of it, I do believe he used those
precise words. ‘
Viv
,’ he told me. ‘
Among all my children, you are my
absolute favorite
.’”

Junior looked surprised, then angry. “You’re lying.”

“I wish I was, June Bug. I wish he’d stop paying me so much
attention and furnish more of his overbearances on the rest of you.”

“How can we both be his favorite?”

She sighed. “Oh, Junior. Don’t you see? We are
all
his
favorite.”

“I don’t like that,” Junior said with a frown.

“I didn’t expect you would. It’s about time you got a taste
of the real world, little brother. By the way, I don’t suppose you’d mind
giving me the crown jewels. Father has asked me to dispose of them.”

“Oh. Yes, of course.” Junior removed the earrings, necklace,
bracelet, and rings, and handed them to her.

***

Second-Cousin-Once-Removed Poleax Longworth was like a
glass vase—stout in shape, fragile in build, and shiny in complexion. He turned
the doorknob counter-clockwise five times, touching his forehead between each
turn, then opened it to let Lily Caine into his bedroom. She stood beside his
dresser, hands folded, and took in her surroundings while Poleax closed the
door. His room was organized like a rainbow color chart, everything from books
to clothing arranged by letter, size and hue.

“I wanted to make sure your feelings weren’t hurt that Father
didn’t invite you to dinner,” Lily told him.

“Invite me? For heaven’s sake, child. I wouldn’t have
attended that dinner in a suit of armor.”

“Why ever not? Father’s given you your own airship… your own
room in our house… he even let you sort the moveable type for his printing
press after Misty knocked the table over. He knows how you like sorting things.
Attending family functions seems only polite.”

“The
Hummingbird
is a fine vessel,” Poleax agreed, running
a hand over a thinning head of oily yet meticulously combed hair. “And I was
honored to sort your father’s letters.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“You’re all stark raving mad, is the problem.”

“Don’t you like living here? Don’t you enjoy working with us
and Father?”

Poleax hesitated. “I’m very fond of you, Lily. You’re a good
friend. And your parents have always been kind to me. But I otherwise prefer
the Caines in small doses. Your younger sister Misty is… how shall I say this?
She is terrifying. And then there’s your brother, who’s frightening in his own
way. Vivian would be a chum, I suppose, if not for all the spitfire and
bravado.”

“Viv always was the tomboy of the litter,” Lily said.

Poleax winced when she sat on the edge of the neatly made
bed. He sat beside her, knees at right angles to the floor, and retrieved
something green and lumpy from a pocket. “Would you care for a cheese? I’ve
been saving it.”

Too polite to refuse him, Lily took it. “Thank you.” It
squished between her fingers. It didn’t look like any sort of cheese she had
ever seen, though it did smell somewhat of feet.

“Aren’t you going to eat it?”

“I’m still full from dinner,” she lied.

“Quite right. So… where will old Ben have us gallivanting off
to next, I wonder?”

“Nowhere for a while, I hope.” She turned toward him. “I’ve
something to tell you, Poleax. Something important. It’s a secret I’ve been
carrying with me for far too long.”

“What is it, Lily?”

“I have decided… that I don’t want to be a pirate anymore.”

Poleax furrowed his brow. “Did I hear you correctly?”

“I’m afraid so.”

“Do you know what your father would say?”

“Why do you think I haven’t told him? Oh, Poleax… whatever
shall I do?”

“Seems to me there is only one thing
to
do about a
problem like this.”